My greatest quality is that I am sooooo honest and my reasons for wanting to enter the house is so that I can showcase the ever so phoney but memorable and likeable personality which I have spent years cultivating so that - win or lose - I am assured of gaining a new life of glamour and wealth without working.
I am versatile and can show my bits
Piss the bed or have fainting fits
Pretend a stammer or nervous stutter
Do wonderous tricks with a knob of butter
But most of all, if I get the chance
I'm up for the sleaziest fake showmance.
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"Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but they are not entitled to their own facts". Daniel Patrick Moynihan (1927-2003)
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