Quote:
Originally Posted by Twosugars
I don't know how why they didn't specify. But the fact is, ECT is administered very conservatively and I mean very.
If nothing else (and there's plenty of medical reasons), it is a very expensive treatment requiring hospital stay etc. No doctor would dream of recommending it if there were alternatives.
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There you go then you just answered your own question as to why you weren't offered it, there are lots of avenues out of it...and as glib as it sounded it can take longer than 5yrs to dig your way out. Now you've decided you want to live start living... find a purpose. Work, hobby, family, friends, lovers. Routine is your friend, have an achievable goal... Even if it only washing your clothes and taking then out of the washer before they start to smell.
Baby steps, natural highs ... go to the lakes, laugh at the sheep, work on your self esteem, make yourself look amazing then go out and smile at people just to watch them smile back.
Confront your issues, write them down, make amends with yourself, move on.
Don't waste any more time, your doctor, ECT, ketamin ... can't help they are things from outside going in, to heal you need it to radiate from within moving outwards.
This might make sense it might not, it helped me and is still helping me, if someone 5yrs ago had told me I could get (and keep) a job or buy a house I would have laughed in their face ( then gone home and cried myself to sleep)
From what I've seen of you on here you seem sensitive, socially aware and morally strong maybe the times we live in are taking their toll... I'm not sure how deep your personal issues pool is but even that's enough to tip some over the edge I guess?
I'm willing you well... I'm sending you all the strength I can muster in the hope it gives you a seizure... (kidding)