Survivor: Thailand
Survivor Thailand is finished! It was my least favourite series so far but not unwatchable either. When put like that, it sounds a bit like BB2? I also sorted out a few of my Edgic charts from previous seasons, especially Borneo, as I watched that season without knowing the elimination order, and there were a lot of ratings that needed fixed. I’ll also add a cast ranking for Borneo soon.
Edgic
1.
Shii Ann - Shii Ann was a fun narrator for the first half of the season, and this season was already dull as it was, but it became even duller once Shii Ann left. Her sarcastic comments, and her hilarious confessionals were missed.
“He is messing with the wrong girl. You do not mess with the Shii Girl and not get the horns.
”
“Food is one of the things which human beings share to show affection for each other.
”
“Robb is an idiot who talks too much with no logical thoughts.
”
(voting out Robb) A wise man knows much but says little; a fool knows little but says far too much.
”
“Penny, you are manipulative, I know that’s not a pleasant word but that’s just the way it is.
”
I am looking forward to watching her in All Stars.
2.
Helen - Same idea as Shii Ann in that Helen’s confessionals were good to watch as she would sit back and talk **** about her tribe-mates all day long.
Helen on Jan: “She’s a nightmare. At one point, I was about ready, if I had a pistol in my pocket, I’d have shot her first and shot me second. That’s why I don’t carry a gun.
Helen on Jan’s pet bat who died: “I feel bad if a kitten dies, but I’m looking at this slimy bat going uhhh yeah that’s real sad, bury that thing before flies get all over it.
”
Helen on how much she likes her tribemates: “Hehhh I guess so as much as you can like STRANGERS.
”
Helen on Clay: “Quite frankly, Clay does SQUAT in camp. He has gone on ONE water run in 33 days and he swamped the boat when he went. That stuff goes right up my hnnnnnnn HELL NO.
”
3.
Clay - Probably not a good person irl but he was funny to watch because he was such an asshole who thought he was above everybody else, but was actually quite pathetic, as reflected by Robb strangling him and Clay’s natural reaction is to flap his arms like a bird and go “HRGHHHHHHHHH”
Everybody hated him, and he hated everybody
Moments from The Clay Jordan Experience include but are not limited to,
- Bringing in a golf club as his luxury item and raging when people want to use it.
- Comparing Helen to an encyclopaedia, because she is not fun and there is nothing fun in there to read, and you only open it up when you want information.
- Writing down “Bye Bye Denver Diva”, to evict Ghandia and getting a warning from Jeff Probst that nicknames were not allowed (although strangely he was fine with Ted voting off Ken as “NYC” in the same season but anyway)
- Saying he would rather eat a hamburger, fries and apple dumpling than have sex with his wife.
- Giving the camera the most unimpressed look when Jan got excited about the Survivor Auction.
- “Penny is a cute sweet little girl. She thinks that her looks and her little talent can get whatever she wants from men, well, I am 46 years old and she ain’t getting **** out of me!”
- His Jake impression
“HeY i’M jUsT a GoOd OlD mOuNtAiN mAn WhO gOeS oUt AnD kIlLs ThEm ElEpHaNtS aNd FaLlS dOwN tHem MoUnTaInS aNd I fIgHt OfF mEn WiTh AlLiGaToRs AnD… if he thinks we’re buying that, he’s crazy.”
- Refusing to answer Helen’s jury question after he watched her shout at Brian, because no answer in the world would satisfy her, so why try?
4.
Ghandia - GHANDIA JOHNSON! 33! LEGAL SECRETARY! (Holly Allen 24 Wyoming left shaking) Ghandia was a scream and I wish she lasted longer. Wanting to punch Clay in the ass and the eye
Screaming LUCKY BASTARDS at Sook Jai after Chuay Ghan lost a comp
Getting so frustrated with Grindgate that she went to the ocean and screamed at the top of her voice, only to be referred to as “Ugh, crazy lady” by Clay
Calling Ted “stupid, asinine and crappy”
BYE BYE DENVER DIVA x
5.
Jan - Ever so slightly overrated but still very good nonetheless. Jan was the MORP happy-go-lucky person who shines very brightly because they are cast in a **** season but we still appreciate them anyway, eg Helen Adams. Basically, Jan was a very kind-hearted, slightly crazy grandma who loved alcohol, got upset over a dead bat which she went on to name Oscar, and said stuff like “First thing I’m doing when I get out of here is having 4 beers, 2 in each hand and a big fat pizza, that’s exactly what I’m going to do, and find some sucker with a cigar and con it off of him. AND LAUGH.
”
6.
Robb - I could not stand Robb at the beginning because he was far too obnoxious, but I ended up liking Robb in the end. Ordinarily I’d have rolled my eyes at someone “going on a journey” in 6 episodes but I didn’t mind it? I also liked that he voted off Shii Ann because she was annoying but assured that it was nothing personal
7.
Stephanie - I kiiiiind of like Stephanie because she went from being “the fun one who is full of life and goes skinny dipping etc” to hating everybody and just wanting the whole experience to be over with
But overall, an inconsequential ep 5 boot who I wouldn’t have minded if she stayed, but wasn’t bothered if she went either.
8.
Jake - Came across like a very nice man
9.
Jed - Lmao he was only on the show for 3 episodes and all 3 of them were just people moaning about how lazy he was
10.
Ted - I don’t really care for anybody from #10 downwards, but Ted was the more likeable one out of this group so here he is...
11.
Penny - Ehh I think she’s liked among Survivor fans, and if so, then I think she’s overrated because I don’t really get the Penny thing at all. She was just kind of, *there*, and her tribe-mates didn’t like her. For a CPN, not very exciting at all imo.
12.
Ken - was a contestant on Survivor Thailand.
13.
Tanya - Seemed to have potential but then she got ill and was voted off, shame.
14.
John -
https://survivor.fandom.com/wiki/John_Raymond
15.
Brian - A smug, arrogant, dick and not even in a funny way either. Helen summed it up when she described him as “the epitome of a used car salesman.” I don’t dislike him though because he at least brought something to the series but **** me he was sleazy as.
16.
Erin - Really boring, and also made some pretty questionable comments about Shii Ann’s culture and how repulsed she was by Shii Ann eating the neck of the chicken.