[Maru]

Knowing nothing about you and your mom's relationship, I would ask yourself if she's a good judge of character on this particular issue. You only met him 2 weeks ago and were pretty hasty to bring him to the house, so maybe it is seen as jumping the gun (or been seen that way)... and if he was actually "cocky" with such a short relationship, maybe the relationship has gone to his head quite a bit for such a short period and she may see it as a red flag

Mothers are protective of their kids, but maybe consider with how short the relationship is, him being cocky may not have been OK for someone she (and you) barely know in this way. Some people really value their family's opinion, to the extent they will break up with folk... others, they don't have that kind of family anyway. So consider where her opinion matters for you.

I almost always think it is worth an argument to speak with someone I care about about issues between us. The exception is when the person is already well aware of the conflict they are causing or if there are emotional problems that cause them to act a certain way...

The other possibility. If you've had a string of bad relationships, then your mother may be overly protective and erring on the side of viligence. It's stressful to see someone we care about get hurt over and over again... and if he's cocky, and she's seen you've been majorly mistreated, then she may be drawing boundaries where she can in order thinking hopefully you'll get the message... after all, if you're old enough she can't tell you what to do, then this may be her way of not only warning off the bf but you for who you bring home... (again knowing nothing about your history) ...

If you really feel it will risk a major argument, then consider that there is more going on with her opinion than just the bf... if she is just this opinionated in general, then obviously the context would be very different... some people are just judgemental, but because of how blunt she was, maybe he did something that she felt went way over the line... and she is not good at putting that into words except for sounding overly critical. Sometimes that's not clear what is really felt when people are upset... you could wait until she's less upset.

If this is your mom, then I think give her the space "to be" who she is, and maybe respect her wishes... at least until until (and if) the relationship is far more serious... maybe also give it more time before bringing someone home, that way you have more experience with that person, you can use that to explain some of their behavior if your mom is a nit-picker... again, all depends on context and a ton of variables ... it could just be that they're oil & water... it happens.

[michael21]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

I’d have a bet with you that they are not together in less than six months.

I have some of that

[AnnieK]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

I’d have a bet with you that they are not together in less than six months.

Not particularly classy betting on someone's potential happiness and relationship. You don't know Amy any more than I do, seems kind of crass to me

[Zizu]

Originally Posted by Maru

Knowing nothing about you and your mom's relationship, I would ask yourself if she's a good judge of character on this particular issue. You only met him 2 weeks ago and were pretty hasty to bring him to the house, so maybe it is seen as jumping the gun (or been seen that way)... and if he was actually "cocky" with such a short relationship, maybe the relationship has gone to his head quite a bit for such a short period and she may see it as a red flag

Mothers are protective of their kids, but maybe consider with how short the relationship is, him being cocky may not have been OK for someone she (and you) barely know in this way. Some people really value their family's opinion, to the extent they will break up with folk... others, they don't have that kind of family anyway. So if her opinion doesn't really matter here (or she is wrong).

I almost always think it is worth an argument to speak with someone I care about about issues between us. The exception is when the person is already well aware of the conflict they are causing or if there are emotional problems that cause them to act a certain way...

The other possibility. If you've had a string of bad relationships, then your mother may be overly protective and erring on the side of viligence. It's stressful to see someone we care about get hurt over and over again... and if he's cocky, and she's seen you've been majorly mistreated, then she may be drawing boundaries where she can in order thinking hopefully you'll get the message... after all, if you're old enough she can't tell you what to do, then this may be her way of not only warning off the bf but you for who you bring home... (again knowing nothing about your history) ...

If you really feel it will risk a major argument, then consider that there is more going on with her opinion than just the bf... if she is just this opinionated in general, then obviously the context would be very different... some people are just judgemental, but because of how blunt she was, maybe he did something that she felt went way over the line... and she is not good at putting that into words except for sounding overly critical. Sometimes that's not clear what is really felt when people are upset... you could wait until she's less upset.

If this is your mom, then I think give her the space "to be" who she is, and maybe respect her wishes... at least until until (and if) the relationship is far more serious... maybe also give it more time before bringing someone home, that way you have more experience with that person, you can use that to explain some of their behavior if your mom is a nit-picker... again, all depends on context and a ton of variables ... it could just be that they're oil & water... it happens.

See post#8
Don't know if it effects your post but she's known him for ages ..


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[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

I’d have a bet with you that they are not together in less than six months.

About two people who you don't know?

Go ahead.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

Not particularly classy betting on someone's potential happiness and relationship. You don't know Amy any more than I do, seems kind of crass to me

Well from Amy,s previous boyfriends she don’t pick one of a very few good ones.

I’m not being crass, bring your personal life to the forum and it’s open to anyone’s opinion positive or negative.

By the way I like Amy.

[Maru]

Originally Posted by Zizu

See post#8
Don't know if it effects your post but she's known him for ages ..


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

Not really, no. Most of my post focuses on Mom & Daughter.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

About two people who you don't know?

Go ahead.

We are now in age were marriage has a short shelf life, young people are having more partners, so the odds are in my favour

Plus I’d like to ask how long has her longest relationship been.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Well from Amy,s previous boyfriends she don’t pick one of a very few good ones.

I’m not being crass, bring your personal life to the forum and it’s open to anyone’s opinion positive or negative.

By the way I like Amy.

I'd say making jokes about a young girl on a forum having anal sex is extremely crass.

[Maru]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Well from Amy,s previous boyfriends she don’t pick one of a very few good ones.

I’m not being crass, bring your personal life to the forum and it’s open to anyone’s opinion positive or negative.

By the way I like Amy.

Yeah, but there's something to be said about tactfulness, sheriff... otherwise I agree with your point. Making bets they won't last is a bit snarky.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

I'd say making jokes about a young girl on a forum having anal sex is extremely crass.

That’s your opinion but it is only a joke, so lighten up.

[Epic.]

Maybe just ask her upfront what her opinion of him is amid mid conversation? That way it's casual, you get answers and she's not being put on the edge

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Maru

Yeah, but there's something to be said about tactfulness, sheriff... otherwise I agree with your point. Making bets they won't last is a bit snarky.

If you take what’s said on here as gospel then you need a wake up call.

If her mum is so against him, the cock remark is probably her being tacfull

[thesheriff443]

Also Amy is a young woman not a young girl marsh

[Maru]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

If you take what’s said on here as gospel then you need a wake up call.

If her mum is so against him, the cock remark is probably her being tacfull

I don't really understand what the first sentence means. I barely read/post in Chat.

The second, we don't know that for sure. We're effectively spreading hearsay rather than gospel... if that's what was meant.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

That’s your opinion but it is only a joke, so lighten up.

I don't need to lighten up.

I'm pointing out your crass comment, when you said you're not being crass.

Be crass all you want, I don't care, but don't deny it.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Maru

I don't really understand what the first sentence means. I barely read/post in Chat.

The second, we don't know that for sure. We're effectively spreading hearsay rather than gospel... if that's what was meant.

It was ment as gospel, none of us know what’s really gong on in her mums head just the same as none of us are relationship experts.

We are all just voicing our own opinions

It’s just how the forum is.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Also Amy is a young woman not a young girl marsh

A girl is a young woman.

Being picky about my choice of word doesn't change the point I made.

[michael21]

Amy gone to bed she got work tomorrow

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

I don't need to lighten up.

I'm pointing out your crass comment, when you said you're not being crass.

Be crass all you want, I don't care, but don't deny it.

The crass comment was a reply to Annie comment not yours.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

A girl is a young woman.

Being picky about my choice of word doesn't change the point I made.

Of course it does, Amy is an adult not a school girl, she said in the sex thread abouthaving sex she would rather have a rub, so I’m happy with my joke to m21 you want to go all moral as you usually do.

[Maru]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

It was ment as gospel, none of us know what’s really gong on in her mums head just the same as none of us are relationship experts.

We are all just voicing our own opinions

It’s just how the forum is.

Ok.

[Zizu]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Of course it does, Amy is an adult not a school girl, she said in the sex thread abouthaving sex she would rather have a rub, so I’m happy with my joke to m21 you want to go all moral as you usually do.

Wait ... .. there's a sex thread ?!?!


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[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

The crass comment was a reply to Annie comment not yours.

I never said it wasn't?

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Of course it does, Amy is an adult not a school girl

I never called her a school girl.

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

as you usually do.

I'd make a comment in kind but I really have no interest in what you "usually do".