[Cherie]

Originally Posted by rusticgal

No it’s not...what makes you think people dont read the comments on here ffs?

We used to have family members come on during BB, and a lot of housemates read the forums after they leave, pretty sure family members will look at the LI threads as well, it’s not any different to post abuse indirectly, I haven’t watched this, but heard an interview she did about it, she got horrendous abuse because she didn’t conform to the perceived norm of what a pop star would look like, most would have been throw away comments like those that were made on here over and over during the BB years, I hope her doing this will help raise awareness that words can really hurt no matter what age you are, I doubt it though

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...I guess for me, I would have to reason my dislike for someone...so that’s something I don’t find easy to understand...people generally do have a reason, even if it’s something that’s very specific to them and hard for someone else to understand or agree with...

People dislike people in real life in work and social situations, they learn to manage their dislike by avoiding them or not interacting with them, if I don't like a celeb I don't go running to their twitter account to tell them I hate them, there is little to understand for me apart from the fact they are emboldened to say what they like by having their identity hidden

[James]

I haven't seen this show, but social media and the Internet in general is a complete mess when it comes to people giving opinions.

When someone can be anonymous or even just unknown or Twitter or Instagram there's no adult responsibility or accountability. It basically turns people back into children and brings out their inner bully.

A lot of people who are active on social media can't handle different opinions to their own. I noticed yesterday the celebrity chef James Martin was trending on Twitter - he made some comment about political correctness - when you look at the comments in response he was getting all sorts of personal abuse said about him and sent to him.

With reality shows like X Factor there's many who take it too far in supporting or criticising contestants. Little Mix are lucky in the respect that they are one of the few acts to gain fame and fortune over the years from X Factor, so they have access to the media to get their story out. There are probably many other contestants who suffered through horrible comments made about them and disappeared from celebrity after 3-6 months and wouldn't be featured in the media.

Originally Posted by LukeB

Difference is people sent Jesy she should die on her social media accounts and she had no choice but to see them but if she saw stuff on the forum then she has a choice to see comments because she's looking herself up,it's different

as horrible as it is and i don't agree with comments about peoples looks etc, it would be better if people put these comments on a forum or a tweet that doesn't @ them than actually searching for their social media accounts and messaging them abuse. Gives them control on what they see because the only way they would see the nasty messages is if they search for themselves.

Both of these aren't great.

One is equivalent to an abusive letter sent to a person through their front door.

The other is equivalent to posting an abusive message about someone on a supermarket's community notice board, for hundreds or thousands of people that the person might know, to share and laugh at.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Amy Jade

She's such a beautiful girl I'll never understand how anyone could call her the 'ugly one' honestly

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...can you imagine posting a photo of something that you’ve done or an event you’ve been to etc...and feeling quite happy about it because it was something you thought of with fondness...and then getting comments after comment after comment of nasty comments...both of how you look and of the person you are.....

I don't need to imagine that.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...the parts of her that she doesn’t like are a huge part of her strength that have helped her get to where she is...

Her legs?

[Nicky91]

on twitter, facebook you got plenty of nasty attention seeking trolls out there


i can understand social media's being used and being very useful for promo work, for musicians, actors but yeah between every good person on there you also got disgusting hate trolls

same on YouTube, in the comments you got the positive comments and you got negative comments and you got horrible hate, thankfully these days YouTube's officials are moderating way more and giving permanent bans to some of those haters and/or trolls who spread negativity, racism, sexism

[Strictly Jake]

Not watched this yet I'm going to watch it shortly

I've always been a massive fan of Little mix they are all lovely girls and I always loved their personalities and they are so talented. So it's infuriates me that so many decided to attack jesys looks poor girl

But I want to applaud and thank jesy for making this and I hope quite a few more celebrities make documentarys like this because in this social media generation its needed

What it makes me think of is my 14 year old niece. I see her all the time she is like a little sister to me she always had a lot of confidence she had a really goofy personality which was great. She was always really athletic always liked her sports. But in the last couple of years I have seen that change in her. She is always looking at her phone, always she doesn't seem to look up anymore, along with a lot of high school kids, as I work at a high school I always see them all coming out of school all looking down at their phones tripping each other up and pushing past one another in the process. The amount of kids I have seen almost be run over due to looking at their phones is ridiculous

But back to my niece, when she comes to stay at ours she barely eats she seems glum she definitely doesn't seem to want to be active. Due to her eczema she gets quite bad outbreaks from time to time and is really self aware of it

But recently my sister told me she has been picked on by one of the lads in her year(I was shocked a lad would talk to a girl like that) she was told she had awful skin she was ugly she was fat.... She is one of the skinniest people I know and is a pretty girl

It made me want to go and find the guy and punch him in the face but then it made me think where has this guy learnt to do this, how many more people that age are like that, how many teenagers are being bullied and feel insecure on a daily basis

And with so much access to their phones how much are they seeing this on social media, its normal for them to see people being bullied on these platforms and it makes it trendy to be like that

And that scares me. Technology is great when used correctly but with stuff like fake filters on Snapchat and Facebook and Instagram making cyber bullying an easy hobby how much worse is it going to get its a scary thought

So hopefully this documentary will help people to think about the words they use to one another

It's certainly opened my eyes. I say things on here for instance I wouldn't say to any of you if I saw you face to face. I wouldn't say I'm a nasty person on here but it can be easy to say not very nice things to each other on platforms like this as you don't see the feelings of the person on the other side of the computer

I think as a forum we should take the lead in just being nice to each other it can be quite a nasty place sometimes

Anyway that's my essay over

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Strictly Jake

Not watched this yet I'm going to watch it shortly

I've always been a massive fan of Little mix they are all lovely girls and I always loved their personalities and they are so talented. So it's infuriates me that so many decided to attack jesys looks poor girl

But I want to applaud and thank jesy for making this and I hope quite a few more celebrities make documentarys like this because in this social media generation its needed

What it makes me think of is my 14 year old niece. I see her all the time she is like a little sister to me she always had a lot of confidence she had a really goofy personality which was great. She was always really athletic always liked her sports. But in the last couple of years I have seen that change in her. She is always looking at her phone, always she doesn't seem to look up anymore, along with a lot of high school kids, as I work at a high school I always see them all coming out of school all looking down at their phones tripping each other up and pushing past one another in the process. The amount of kids I have seen almost be run over due to looking at their phones is ridiculous

But back to my niece, when she comes to stay at ours she barely eats she seems glum she definitely doesn't seem to want to be active. Due to her eczema she gets quite bad outbreaks from time to time and is really self aware of it

But recently my sister told me she has been picked on by one of the lads in her year(I was shocked a lad would talk to a girl like that) she was told she had awful skin she was ugly she was fat.... She is one of the skinniest people I know and is a pretty girl

It made me want to go and find the guy and punch him in the face but then it made me think where has this guy learnt to do this, how many more people that age are like that, how many teenagers are being bullied and feel insecure on a daily basis

And with so much access to their phones how much are they seeing this on social media, its normal for them to see people being bullied on these platforms and it makes it trendy to be like that

And that scares me. Technology is great when used correctly but with stuff like fake filters on Snapchat and Facebook and Instagram making cyber bullying an easy hobby how much worse is it going to get its a scary thought

So hopefully this documentary will help people to think about the words they use to one another

It's certainly opened my eyes. I say things on here for instance I wouldn't say to any of you if I saw you face to face. I wouldn't say I'm a nasty person on here but it can be easy to say not very nice things to each other on platforms like this as you don't see the feelings of the person on the other side of the computer

I think as a forum we should take the lead in just being nice to each other it can be quite a nasty place sometimes

Anyway that's my essay over

great post Jake, we have all said and done stuff on here we are not proud of, but we can make that change, it's all in our own hands so to speak

MJ make that change is now playing in my head

[Strictly Jake]

I have just looked at it and had the fright of my life

The very school I work at, the very school my niece goes to, and is bullied at. Is the school where sian went. The school was absolutely devastated by it. The teachers I speak to on a regular basis that taught her they were brokenhearted. But it's still carrying on. My niece is being bullied at the same school as sian. I can't take it! I'm gonna talk to the teachers today, they are the life and philosophy teachers and one of them teaches my niece I'm gonna make damn sure this documentary gets shown which I'm sure it will be with the connections to sian

But Im at that part of the programme now and it made me shudder in my chair. I don't want my niece to go through the same thing or any other of her friends to. My niece was upset when sian passed because she had spoken to her a couple of times at school

[Nicky91]

Originally Posted by Strictly Jake

Not watched this yet I'm going to watch it shortly

I've always been a massive fan of Little mix they are all lovely girls and I always loved their personalities and they are so talented. So it's infuriates me that so many decided to attack jesys looks poor girl

But I want to applaud and thank jesy for making this and I hope quite a few more celebrities make documentarys like this because in this social media generation its needed

What it makes me think of is my 14 year old niece. I see her all the time she is like a little sister to me she always had a lot of confidence she had a really goofy personality which was great. She was always really athletic always liked her sports. But in the last couple of years I have seen that change in her. She is always looking at her phone, always she doesn't seem to look up anymore, along with a lot of high school kids, as I work at a high school I always see them all coming out of school all looking down at their phones tripping each other up and pushing past one another in the process. The amount of kids I have seen almost be run over due to looking at their phones is ridiculous

But back to my niece, when she comes to stay at ours she barely eats she seems glum she definitely doesn't seem to want to be active. Due to her eczema she gets quite bad outbreaks from time to time and is really self aware of it

But recently my sister told me she has been picked on by one of the lads in her year(I was shocked a lad would talk to a girl like that) she was told she had awful skin she was ugly she was fat.... She is one of the skinniest people I know and is a pretty girl

It made me want to go and find the guy and punch him in the face but then it made me think where has this guy learnt to do this, how many more people that age are like that, how many teenagers are being bullied and feel insecure on a daily basis

And with so much access to their phones how much are they seeing this on social media, its normal for them to see people being bullied on these platforms and it makes it trendy to be like that

And that scares me. Technology is great when used correctly but with stuff like fake filters on Snapchat and Facebook and Instagram making cyber bullying an easy hobby how much worse is it going to get its a scary thought

So hopefully this documentary will help people to think about the words they use to one another

It's certainly opened my eyes. I say things on here for instance I wouldn't say to any of you if I saw you face to face. I wouldn't say I'm a nasty person on here but it can be easy to say not very nice things to each other on platforms like this as you don't see the feelings of the person on the other side of the computer

I think as a forum we should take the lead in just being nice to each other it can be quite a nasty place sometimes

Anyway that's my essay over

amen to that

[rusticgal]

Originally Posted by Cherie

We used to have family members come on during BB, and a lot of housemates read the forums after they leave, pretty sure family members will look at the LI threads as well, it’s not any different to post abuse indirectly, I haven’t watched this, but heard an interview she did about it, she got horrendous abuse because she didn’t conform to the perceived norm of what a pop star would look like, most would have been throw away comments like those that were made on here over and over during the BB years, I hope her doing this will help raise awareness that words can really hurt no matter what age you are, I doubt it though

She will raise some awareness for making this programme...sadly it wont stop it.

[Swan]

She was ridiculously hot before the surgery, she really didn't need it. Not really interested in watching, but yeah hope she got the help she needed etc.

[Strictly Jake]

So I talked to the teacher about the documentary. She used to teach sian. She hadn't watched it yet but I said you need to show it in class she said yeah she can do and it's a good idea. Hopefully every school does the same

[Strictly Jake]

I still can't believe the impact this show had on me. A few unkind words we use and can easily forget about others can carry around with them for the rest of their lives and it can have a severe impact on them

I wasn't badly bullied in school but because I'm more feminine than other lads and hung around with girls(much better company) lads would trip me up slap me spit on me etc call me horrible words beginning with F and I wasnt gay.

I have a feeling that bullying at school has got worse now as there is more stuff for people to pick on

I really want to champion the anti bullying and online trolling thing and I'm not sure how I go about doing that

But Im going to just try setting a lead on here for starters and hope people can learn to be more kind but I think I need to set up some local club in my hometown like they had in the documentary

[Amy Jade]

Jake

Hope you speaking out to a teacher can help your niece. I was heavily bullied in high school too, holds some really bad memories for me. Hope things turn around.

[MB.]

Originally Posted by James

A lot of people who are active on social media can't handle different opinions to their own. I noticed yesterday the celebrity chef James Martin was trending on Twitter - he made some comment about political correctness - when you look at the comments in response he was getting all sorts of personal abuse said about him and sent to him.

I think James Martin going on an unhinged transphobic rant about a cartoon character and then accidentally coming out as an otter is a slightly different case to Jesy Nelson getting death threats for being a woman in the public eye

[Strictly Jake]

Originally Posted by Alf

You'd be surprised, it's worse than how he looks, (Orange man, Shredded Wheat head) they actually say that he is sexually attracted to his own daughter.

I'd say the same thing to them then. People should be judged on the actions they take not on the way they look

Bullying shouldn't be allowed. I don't want this social media generation to get worse it scares me. I have young kids to think about I don't want them to grow up in a cruel social media generation

Which is why I'm begging as a forum we all come together to combat attacking people. Yeah it might not make much of a difference but think of the amount of members we have on here think how many guests view the forum. If we all changed our viewpoint and just take a second thought that could prove to be a very powerful thing...

Also remember how many people that are on here are still at school let's give them a positive platform to be on and as older members set them an example

[parmnion]

To take alfs point up...

Trump will receive far more abuse than this normal young lassie.

It's all down to how the individual deals with it..

So i find her actions very extreme...


...but then you have a young head to take into consideration. ..and that for me is where the Internet fails. .it should never have been made available for all.

.

[Strictly Jake]

Originally Posted by parmnion

To take alfs point up...

Trump will receive far more abuse than this normal young lassie.

It's all down to how the individual deals with it..

So i find her actions very extreme...


...but then you have a young head to take into consideration. ..and that for me is where the Internet fails. .it should never have been made available for all.

.

Just wondering what extreme actions you are referring to. Because how do we know these politicians haven't tried the same and I guess the environment they have worked in and the job they have they are used to dealing with it and expect it

Jesy was a bar maid went on x factor straight into the media. Maybe that's where the problem lies people aren't prepared for it. But it's still no excuse for people to say those things about others and I don't understand why people do it?

[James]

Originally Posted by MB.

I think James Martin going on an unhinged transphobic rant about a cartoon character and then accidentally coming out as an otter is a slightly different case to Jesy Nelson getting death threats for being a woman in the public eye

I thought it was about 'Fireman Sam' being dropped by a fire service.

But whatever it was they should have criticised his opinion rather than sending personal insults. Many of them would likely say they were appalled by the abuse Jesy from Little Mix got, but then people online don't live up to the standards they set for others.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Strictly Jake

Just wondering what extreme actions you are referring to. Because how do we know these politicians haven't tried the same and I guess the environment they have worked in and the job they have they are used to dealing with it and expect it

Jesy was a bar maid went on x factor straight into the media. Maybe that's where the problem lies people aren't prepared for it. But it's still no excuse for people to say those things about others and I don't understand why people do it?

By extreme I mean attempting suicide.


And I think she did that because her mind wasnt mature enought to just shake these insults off like trump or someone else elderly..


Let's say you post something you like. ...and all you get is abuse...Im sure even you and me at your age and my age have felt a little bit cut to the core...imagine how she felt with such a young head where life hasn't already tossed crap like that at her year after year..


Imo..the Internet or social media, fails because it allows strangers to actually have and air an opinion of you...directly to you...when that is at times, the last thing and also at times the first thing you are looking for...

Only difference is the age of the brain and how it works the scenarios it is looking for.
.

[Strictly Jake]

Originally Posted by James

I thought it was about 'Fireman Sam' being dropped by a fire service.

But whatever it was they should have criticised his opinion rather than sending personal insults. Many of them would likely say they were appalled by the abuse Jesy from Little Mix got, but then people online don't live up to the standards they set for others.

The thing is it can be all to easy to say personal insults without even realising its personal. But the other person can be so badly affected. Its such a dangerous world online!

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by James

I thought it was about 'Fireman Sam' being dropped by a fire service.

But whatever it was they should have criticised his opinion rather than sending personal insults. Many of them would likely say they were appalled by the abuse Jesy from Little Mix got, but then people online don't live up to the standards they set for others.

... not always living up to the standards being set for others isn’t an online thing though, it’s quite a common human characteristic...in fact it’s inherent in all of us to one degree or another...we scream hypocrite at others, while adjusting our own hypocrisies to fit our judgements, we are all hypocrites...but own behaviour will always or often feel a justification...humans have always done this...how Jesy was targeted and attacked though, is an entirely different thing...all of her beauty has been stripped from her ...(...in her own mind..)...because the voices telling her she’s beautiful have been drowned out by those telling her something quite cruelly different...words have always carried much weight and responsibility...and hypocrisy has always been a thing...

[Ammi]

...I’m so glad that your niece has such an uncle as you, Jake.....already that will have made such a difference to her life in so many great ways...