[zakman440]

Big Brother has been an absolute hoot this year. The housemates have been cast brilliantly, Annihilation Week got everyone talking, and from facial expressions to one-liners, we've had plenty to get stuck into.

But while this series has been one of the best for ages, there's still one problem: tasks. The show is just not living up to its glory years when it comes to setting the housemates challenges, and it's infuriating.

So here, Digital Spy puts on a stern face and tells Big Brother how to fix its task problem in eight easy steps:

1. STOP THE VOMITING



Look, we get it. People gagging is funny (unless you're an emetophobe who has to hide behind the sofa/fast forward/scream into a pillow because you can't bear people barfing on screen).

Alright, so that might just be us, but surely everyone's tired of the standard fish guts tasks by now? There's only so many times you can see someone reaching for the sick bucket before you've had enough, and we've had enough. It's easy to create drama by making people feel queasy, but it's just not all that entertaining. Especially when we're watching with our dinner.

2. BE STRICT WITH THE RULES AND STRICT WITH THE CONSEQUENCES



In one of the more general problems Big Brother is facing at the moment, the housemates know they can essentially run riot. What's BB going to do to them? Turn off the hot water for an hour? Big deal. And this is now invading the tasks.

In the good old days it would be obvious how the group failed or passed a task - three rule breakages, no matter how minor, and you were done. Now, it's a huge number of fails in an envelope that makes it easy to pass, or Big Brother ignores some of the housemates' transgressions. And even if they do fail, it's not like they suffer: Big Brother finds a way for them to supplement their basic shopping with takeaways and treats. Be strict - make them work for it, and if they fail, banish them to the chickpeas. Heck, bring back them betting a proportion of their shopping budget on whether they'll pass, that was always good for a laugh.

3. STOP MANUFACTURING DRAMA WITH MEAN TASKS

We hardly ever get proper, creative, varied Big Brother tasks any more. Instead, we're always treated to thinly-veiled excuses to get the housemates to bitch about each other, choosing the "biggest backstabber" or "least genuine" or... sorry, we fell asleep for a moment there.

The fact is that you don't need to manufacture this artificial drama when the tasks can create much more interesting conflict all on their own. Whether it's someone not pulling their weight or the stress of a challenge getting to someone, there'll always be something going on. We long for the days of Michelle Bass wearing her Boot Camp outfit with her breasts hanging out, screaming blue murder at Ahmed. Those were the days.

Oh, and while you're at it? Stop the outside contact, BB, ta.

4. BRING BACK THE THREE-DAY LONG CHALLENGES - AND THE OUTFITS, OBVIOUSLY



This series of Big Brother almost tried to replicate the classic tasks of yore with the BBCorp task, but it's nothing compared to what we used to get. The tasks would last for days, with outfits and various challenges. Now, they're almost a distraction - over in a flash before we can even really remember what the housemates had been asked to do.

Whether it was the Fast Food task, the Zoo or the Big Brother Hospital, these themed tasks, with lots of different things for the housemates to take responsibility for, still make us giggle when we think about them. And while you're at it, BB, bring back the overnight challenges. People having to stay up all night (and we mean all night) is always a treat - think of the simple challenge to keep a fire going, or Imogen's amazing milk sabotage. Alternatively, make them do something whenever a sound is played into the house and get it going at all hours. We want to see sleepy-eyed housemates blundering their way to a rollerskating rink like they used to.

5. GIVE THEM A CHANCE TO ACTUALLY ACHIEVE SOMETHING



At the moment, the housemates basically see the tasks as something to bear so that they can get back to gossip and booze. But perhaps that's because they're not being given the chance to really stretch themselves. Whether it's learning another language or training a dog, there's something uplifting and special about seeing housemates' hard work pay off. Big Brother doesn't always have to be about arguments and strife. We want to cheer along with the group, too.

Just think back to the days when Big Brother housemates worked long and hard and actually managed to break some Guinness World Records. We just can't imagine that ever happening now.

6. HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOUR

Big Brother tasks have always been at their best when they're just plain old silly. There can be real wit and humour to the show, whether it's small things like Big Brother challenging housemates to name the horse he's thinking of to win some toilet paper, or people dressing as seals and listening to 'Kiss from a Rose', some of the later series have been lacking that nonsense. And we love a bit of nonsense.

7. TAKE A LESSON FROM THE UNITED STATES AND GO BIG



When we still weren't sure what was going on with the second house this year, rumours began swirling that Big Brother was getting a "task arena". We're not going to pretend this didn't make us seriously excited at the thought of what we might be in for - only for our hopes to be dashed. But for a lesson in what tasks could be, the producers wouldn't hurt themselves by casting an eye over at the American version of the show.

We still want our long, three-day tasks, obviously, but the one-off challenges and competitions could do with some serious investment. In the States, the housemates get raised in the air and blasted with water during physically draining endurance tasks which can see them last for hours; they face obstacle courses on a ginormous scale. BBUS has its own problems with competitions - they basically have the same ones every year, with just a slight change of theme - but the investment and cash is clear (as is how seriously the housemates take them). Go big, Big Brother.

8. BRING BACK THE LIVE SATURDAY NIGHT TASKS

Hell, why not? It's not like we get much live feed…

Big Brother airs on Channel 5.

Some good points raised in here - especially the one about taking inspiration from BBUS with larger tasks

[Natalie.]

Love this
Would love the hnd to become a big task room

[Rob!]

Great article. The tasks are the only thing that have let this series down really.

[Jordan.]

All perfect points but it'll just fall on deaf ears so w/e