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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #626 | |||
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¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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would it not
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #627 | |||
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like the boys
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #628 | ||
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Adios
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Not us letting jarrod and Tom stay up late for Eurovision and them both misbehaving
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #629 | |||
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folklore
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oh yes a new page
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #630 | |||
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¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Featuring the heart-wrenching tale of a lone egg’s battle against the over-sexualisation of the music industry. And also mayonnaise, because Belgium. I don’t know either. In homage to these complete and utter choons: Spoiler: The Chandelier Bit A faint spotlight is cast on Siegg. It’s an egg. Spoiler: Listen up, I’ve got one concern Hear me out now, it’s time for my turn I’ve a point to make, a point to make Don’t zone out ‘cause my country’s small We TiBBsters know size isn’t all ‘Cause we’re a chode (metaphorically, y’know) One can see, it’s affecting me, me I can’t stand feeling this guilty So now I’m going to come clean And I guess all of Europe’ll see that I’ve eaten all of the mayonnaise, all the mayonnaise This has been eating at me for days, that I ate mayonnaise I’ll have to buy more but I can’t face the shame All of Bruges knows my name Even if I’m now a cannibal, I’m still being paid… As Siegg (funny rite?) sings this touching ballad, a montage showing the impact that mayonnaise has had on culturally significant events throughout the course of history is played: Spoiler: ~end slideshow~ How could it just disappear? I suppose I’ll just have to stay clear Of the rest of my waffles and beer And chocolate, I guess they make that here Please believe me, I’m being sincere Don’t believe me? Just look at my tears My poor fries are as bare as- The backing track cuts out suddenly. Siegg looks up from her overextended metaphor to see four interchangeable, slightly insanitary women (The Real Official™ Pussy Popping Eggy Sluts Sponsored By Hellman’s Light Mayo) strutting onto the stage to Spoiler: The Pretty Girls Bit Hey girl, wipe your mind Of mayonnaise Let it go, like Elsa says Crying just won’t get you laid (it’s Eggy-Eggs) This song’s so witty! This parody’s for All the gays So drop that mayo, on the floor We’ll need a clean-up in aisle four Now here’s our titties! Hey Don’t you know I was singing ‘bout pain? Well, the pain of losing mayonnaise For god’s sake you scrubbers, just turn that tempo down A sad song always gets you a cheer It’s what got that Sam Smith a career Now excuse me 'cause I’ve got Mayo on my mind (Girl please shut up) It’s just one jar, hey? (Listen to us) Wasn’t that a good segue? (Mayonnaise?) So yesterday, please (Salmonella teas) All around the world We can name… …like, two countries? We’re not ashamed Don’t get the D by knowing Spain Or maths or history! While we’ve still got boobs And a foof We’ll market them and that’s the truth No more tears, just waffle* (*blue) Belgium reference! Tell me, can you at least go put on some bras? As I go cry for my mayo jars Every time I try to leave, girls, you just interrupt me Cause this is my personal hell I can still see your fried eggs as well And hang on, what’s that fishy smell? (Sorry, that’s me) (Girl, just chill out) Have a sit down (My boob fell out) Something something noun (We got a good plan) Don’t lose your hair, hen (…that’s not to you, Glenn) Right, now, here’s our plan Little egg Give some cleavage, show some leg Take your chance while in your prime #sexydairytime Girls, wait, don’t you think That’s perverse To flash my yolk? There’s nothing worse Where should I go with this verse? Buy Jackie on iTunes ~exeunt the pussy poppers~ It’s now the part of the song to kill some hussies I’m not selling out to some pubic lice posse I think it’s icky-icky to give ‘em one more chance Especially with the hygiene of a guy from France I’m a classy lil’ egg, you won’t see my lil’ chest And I know my soufflé’ll keep the whole world pressed I’m sure nobody’s still reading this crap by now So I’ll use this line to ask all my Irish followers to vote #no on 22nd May, keep those feckin’ gays out ergh it’s Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve All across the globe (France excepted) Where I go, I be respected Well, if an egg can be respected Don’t mess with me How has this song turned Into one All about egg feminism? Germaine Greer would simply jism And that’s the image I’ll end on! Siegg slays the Sluts (with her back turned to them in a final tribute to Sia, obvs) with her…. erm… magical egg powers for suggesting that she'd sell her shelly body for cash, in a fight of, like, Serious Debates & News proportions. A nation weeps for music. The screen fades to black and the credits roll, to a backdrop of rapturous applause. In order of appearance: Spoiler: ~fin~
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #631 | |||
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like the boys
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(...soz Belgium)
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16-05-2015, 07:29 PM | #632 | |||
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I Love my brick
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16-05-2015, 07:30 PM | #633 | ||
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Banned
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I don't know what I just witness but I'm pretty sure it was spectacular.
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16-05-2015, 07:30 PM | #634 | ||
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Adios
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Slay at my (loss of) hairs impact
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #635 | ||
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omg what
i love it well done |
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #636 | |||
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folklore
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Spectacular
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #637 | ||
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the one on the far left giving me ben christmasvision teas |
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #638 | |||
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Life imitates art
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best one so far well done MB
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #639 | |||
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Texas Forever
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Brilliant
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16-05-2015, 07:31 PM | #640 | |||
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Quand il pleut, il pleut
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..MB..wow, that's spectacular, I love the lyrics.....
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16-05-2015, 07:32 PM | #641 | |||
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Like a fine whiskey
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Just jealous you would never look that fine in a mayo bottle
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16-05-2015, 07:33 PM | #642 | |||
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I Love my brick
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Amazing MB
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16-05-2015, 07:33 PM | #643 | |||
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Hakuna Matata
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MB
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16-05-2015, 07:33 PM | #644 | ||
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Adios
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That was great MB
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16-05-2015, 07:33 PM | #645 | |||
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Like a fine whiskey
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MB
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16-05-2015, 07:34 PM | #646 | |||
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x
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Well done MB
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16-05-2015, 07:34 PM | #647 | |||
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Mokka
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Wow .... MB.... just Wow
I feel like i need to re-discover it a couple of more times to fully appreciate
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16-05-2015, 07:34 PM | #648 | |||
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¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I love a good doge meme! That was not one of them. Will you lighten the fuck up, Augustine! NO. I WANT DENMARK NOW NOW NOW.
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16-05-2015, 07:35 PM | #649 | |||
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like the boys
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For all being so kind (apart from that slut Augustine), here you go: (nsfw)
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16-05-2015, 07:36 PM | #650 | ||
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