Zombie Attack!!

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

http://fabakis.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/zombies.jpg

OH MY GOD! I have just seen on the news that the world is being overun by Zombies. Its happening people – as such what are you plans??

Mine are simple, I'd go downstairs and clear everything and anything that would be of use, and take it all upstairs when I would cram as much in as I could, providing if I knew the garden was safe I would run out and over turn a plant pot or two, emptying said plants and drag them up the stairs as well. Stripping all and anything that would be use and get it all upstairs, i'd raid the fridges and freezers for any supplies and empty and fill all containers I could with water, any food stuff is upstairs, whatever furniture etc ccouldn't be moved would be smashed up and to barricade any entrances other bits for fire wood. All things flammable would be dumped in garden, Im going to block myself in, dont want to burn to death as well, im sure zombies can't build fires, but they might knock a flame over (or I just make sure as not to leave a lit candle about). I would then take all internal doors off the hinges and cover the stairs, so as to block any way in. I would then start work on smashing a hole through the wall of the bedroom into the bathroom so I could still use them both without actually leaving either of the two rooms (hallway) and then, repeating the same process downstairs as upstairs, I would then get comfy, watch the news and cook some hearty grub in my makeshift ovens out of burning furniture in my nice oven made from a plant pot (did you wonder why I'd get that). Checking on my defences often, and pleased at the amount of crap I can stuff in my new studio apartment.

I would then last out the zombie attack and wait for the nice men to come and save me.

I would then have fun looting.

[arsenalforever]

i would go Shaun of the dead on their Arse with a cricket bat and save some babes:joker:

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

i would go Shaun of the dead on their Arse with a cricket bat and save some babes:joker:

Are you mad (I mean I know you support Arsenal but still)? I saw that documentary you mentioned, the survival rate was low, unless of course you were in the other better group they passed in the alley.

I would not dare go out in public, until I needed some rizla or tobacco.

[Lee.]

Firstly, I would go all "Home Alone" on them and booby trap my house and garden to make entry as tricky as possible, including running high amounts of electricity to all exterior door handles...

Then I would move everything in the house (that would fit through hatch) into the attic including all food and drink and a hammer.. I would then climb into attic myself, ensuring that I pulled the step ladder up with me and get comfy whilst I awaited attack.. For food, I would microwave soup/beans/peas/sweetcorn.

If said zombies were to get past my clever booby traps, I would see them coming through hatch and simply throw everything I had taken up with me at them from a height.. Obviously I would begin with heavy items of furntire but if they kept coming even after I had dropped everything, I would use my hammer to hammer them as they tried to reach hatch...

I've just realised I'm not so sure if I have plug sockets in my attic, so my microwave plan may have to be ditched.. I would still take it mind you as it is quite heavy and I am sure would do a lot of damage..

[Tom4784]

I'd grab all the food and supplies in my house and hide up in the attic until it all blew over.

[Dr.Gonzo]

Rollerblades and sumurai swords is the way to win this war.

[Enid]

Awesome picture.

My strategy is simple. Death is inevitable, so I would let them disembowel me then come after you.

[Dr.Gonzo]

I would let you eat me, Enid :D

[Enid]

I would let you eat me, Enid :D
Well you live closer so I guess you would be my first target. :D

[Sir_Diary_of_Roomus]

Go get a push bike and bladed weapons, as well as a suit of chain mail and ride off to a huge open area with plenty of hills for vantage points. Defend position until the Winchester is deemed safe.

Anyone else own Max Brooks' Zombie Survival Guide/WWZ? :)

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Happyland and Dezzy, I too have given thought about the attic, but it wouldnt be very homely up there, and no mattress either, let alone a window to see when safety was coming, I would need to be able to watch to see if anything was happening outside, and to watch the tele, providing power wasnt cut (and why microwaves might become obsolete very quickly). Plus I know I can't get the TV up there as I tried to keep the box it came in but it would fit through the hatch.

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Rollerblades and sumurai swords is the way to win this war.

You have these items? being a Hunter fan I can believe you just might....

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Awesome picture.

My strategy is simple. Death is inevitable, so I would let them disembowel me then come after you.


Thats a bad strategy you know, plus a helluva zombie stumble/walk to get to me (and you'd have to go through or around London, it might be fairly busy)

Either way you'd just be pacing about in my garden, I'd wave as I ate something from my garden pot stove.

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Go get a push bike and bladed weapons, as well as a suit of chain mail and ride off to a huge open area with plenty of hills for vantage points. Defend position until the Winchester is deemed safe.

Anyone else own Max Brooks' Zombie Survival Guide/WWZ? :)

What would happen if you were forced off one hill, you'd cycle down, take a few out but then you'd be in the valley and have given up such a vantage point, seems crazy that soo many people would go outside instead of waiting for people with guns.

[DrunkerThanMoses]

Why dont zombies each other? Its not fair they rip alive people apart and eat their guts?

[MiuMiu]

Di anyone see "Zombieland"?
It was supposed to be epic!
And really funny too.
:)

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Why dont zombies each other? Its not fair they rip alive people apart and eat their guts?


maybe the guts need to be fresh, or better fresh, you know like with pasta.

either/or

wouldnt it be sort of cannabalism to eat their own (zombie) kind

and

if zombies are the undead, when Jesus was killed and came back, does that make him a zombie?

[Lee.]

Happyland and Dezzy, I too have given thought about the attic, but it wouldnt be very homely up there, and no mattress either, let alone a window to see when safety was coming, I would need to be able to watch to see if anything was happening outside, and to watch the tele, providing power wasnt cut (and why microwaves might become obsolete very quickly). Plus I know I can't get the TV up there as I tried to keep the box it came in but it would fit through the hatch.

Homely?? I won't bother about homely when the living dead come for me! Plus I don't really see the advantage of having a window.. you may be able to see them coming but they would be able to see you and the window is also another easy point of entry! Attic for me!

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Homely?? I won't bother about homely when the living dead come for me! Plus I don't really see the advantage of having a window.. you may be able to see them coming but they would be able to see you and the window is also another easy point of entry! Attic for me!


Lol, Im one floor up though and its double glazing, plus I'd have the curtains shut (they normally are anyway, until recently that is, for some reason). So they wouldnt be able to attack.

What would you do about bodily functions though? (is that too personal) have I given this far too much thought?

I would need something with more than one exit as well, though I suppose I could crawl through into the neighbours house but they'd probably be zombied as they aren't the most street wise. (lol, nor am I, but they are much worse)

I would have everything below window level, I would wait to look out for planes and 'copters and the such like.

[DrunkerThanMoses]

maybe the guts need to be fresh, or better fresh, you know like with pasta.

either/or

wouldnt it be sort of cannabalism to eat their own (zombie) kind

and

if zombies are the undead, when Jesus was killed and came back, does that make him a zombie?

I suppose it will be cannabalism.

Jesus as a zombie would be cool, the main relgion in the world read their teachings from a zombie.

SOunds good for a a movie title.

Passion Of The Christ 2 : Zombie Jesus' Revenge!
Passion of the Christ 3 : Zombie Jesus Lives!

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Di anyone see "Zombieland"?
It was supposed to be epic!
And really funny too.
:)

Not me.......but watching a film about them is hardly a plan. You'd be one of them in no time and then Dr Gonzo might skate past you and end you (before Enid eats him that is)

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

I suppose it will be cannabalism.

Jesus as a zombie would be cool, the main relgion in the world read their teachings from a zombie.

SOunds good for a a movie title.

Passion Of The Christ 2 : Zombie Jesus' Revenge!
Passion of the Christ 3 : Zombie Jesus Lives!


and just for you a crossover film

ZOMBIE JESUS VS MOSES - let the battle commence

[MiuMiu]

Not me.......but watching a film about them is hardly a plan. You'd be one of them in no time and then Dr Gonzo might skate past you and end you (before Enid eats him that is)

Ya lol, that's true haha.

Can you just pretend your a Zombie?
I mean, theres a big crowd of Zombies walking down a street ok?
All wailing and moaning and dragging their feet.
Couldn't you just slip in there, maybe tear up your clothes a little, start maoning like a porn star and dragging one of your feet?

They'd hardly notice would they....? If you were a brilliant actor like. Meryl Streep all the way.....
:conf:

[Lee.]

Lol, Im one floor up though and its double glazing, plus I'd have the curtains shut (they normally are anyway, until recently that is, for some reason). So they wouldnt be able to attack.

What would you do about bodily functions though? (is that too personal) have I given this far too much thought?

I would need something with more than one exit as well, though I suppose I could crawl through into the neighbours house but they'd probably be zombied as they aren't the most street wise. (lol, nor am I, but they are much worse)

I would have everything below window level, I would wait to look out for planes and 'copters and the such like.

One floor up or not, I still think it is safer to be as high as possible. Have you considered possible attack from the actual attic? I think not...

Bodily functions, I have sorted. I would break a hole in attic floor down to bathroom and barricade bathroom door..

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

One floor up or not, I still think it is safer to be as high as possible. Have you considered possible attack from the actual attic? I think not...

Bodily functions, I have sorted. I would break a hole in attic floor down to bathroom and barricade bathroom door..

Thankfully its hard enough now to get up into the attic, so thats not an issue about a zombie attack from that direction. It might get cold up there as well, especially if you are living on top of all the insulation, the house would be warm but you cold.....

I assume that you would also be making some form of ladder to go up and down to the bathroom rather than taking aim from a height? That could prove to be messy after a very short while....

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Ya lol, that's true haha.

Can you just pretend your a Zombie?
I mean, theres a big crowd of Zombies walking down a street ok?
All wailing and moaning and dragging their feet.
Couldn't you just slip in there, maybe tear up your clothes a little, start maoning like a porn star and dragging one of your feet?

They'd hardly notice would they....? If you were a brilliant actor like. Meryl Streep all the way.....
:conf:

You could take you chances I guess, but what happens if you were to stumble past a zombie film critic, who saw through your bad acting (or good acting, but critics are rarely happy) and then bit off half your face and neck in true zombie style.

What would you even go out for? A stroll round the park?

Or are you just trying to loot all the good stuff before I come out of my hole?

[Lee.]

Thankfully its hard enough now to get up into the attic, so thats not an issue about a zombie attack from that direction. It might get cold up there as well, especially if you are living on top of all the insulation, the house would be warm but you cold.....

I assume that you would also be making some form of ladder to go up and down to the bathroom rather than taking aim from a height? That could prove to be messy after a very short while....

I wouldn't need to make a ladder, I would have the one I used to climb into the attic.. But aiming from a height might keep me amused for a while as you were right about the telly being too big..

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

I wouldn't need to make a ladder, I would have the one I used to climb into the attic.. But aiming from a height might keep me amused for a while as you were right about the telly being too big..

You should get some power extension cables as well, so you can have the laptop up there. (I assume laptop) they are so much cheaper than an actual computer and they are the pretty much the same, I dont know what a PC does differently than a lap top?) or maybe my PC was just that old. lol

[Lee.]

You should get some power extension cables as well, so you can have the laptop up there. (I assume laptop) they are so much cheaper than an actual computer and they are the pretty much the same, I dont know what a PC does differently than a lap top?) or maybe my PC was just that old. lol

Oh I hadn't thought about extension cables!! My microwave idea is now valid again!

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Oh I hadn't thought about extension cables!! My microwave idea is now valid again!

See, this is exactly why I started this thread, I feel I made your world a little safer now. Its good to plan these things out.

My work is nearly done.

[Lee.]

See, this is exactly why I started this thread, I feel I made your world a little safer now. Its good to plan these things out.

My work is nearly done.

Oh I agree... these things have to be given thought!

I used to work in a pet shop when I was young and I used to plan if (sort of) the same thing happened and I was trapped in the shop, what I would eat first..(not the animals you understand)

I decided on the dogs choccy buttons first, followed by the (plain) bonio biscuits..

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Oh I agree... these things have to be given thought!

I used to work in a pet shop when I was young and I used to plan if (sort of) the same thing happened and I was trapped in the shop, what I would eat first..(not the animals you understand)

I decided on the dogs choccy buttons first, followed by the (plain) bonio biscuits..


Haha I know what to get you for Xmas now.

At work we sell chew things for pets - including a bag of pigs ears, hmm, so so wrong.

[Jords]

Id go outside and greet these zombie people, then become friends with them and teach them to jump through hoops of fire and juggle with chainsaws, that is, if they decided I was allowed to live :D

[MiuMiu]

You could take you chances I guess, but what happens if you were to stumble past a zombie film critic, who saw through your bad acting (or good acting, but critics are rarely happy) and then bit off half your face and neck in true zombie style.

What would you even go out for? A stroll round the park?

Or are you just trying to loot all the good stuff before I come out of my hole?

I forgot about the looting.
How cool would that be???
You could just nab whatever you wanted.
:D

But, DAMN YOU!
You're so right.
Those damn critic zombies!
:(

But i'd give it an owld go anyways lol.
:joker:

[Lee.]

Haha I know what to get you for Xmas now.

At work we sell chew things for pets - including a bag of pigs ears, hmm, so so wrong.

Oh I know.. we used to sell all types of pig body parts for dogs to chew on ; ears, trotters, penises! It is wrong, I used to hate handling them!!

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Id go outside and greet these zombie people, then become friends with them and teach them to jump through hoops of fire and juggle with chainsaws, that is, if they decided I was allowed to live :D

Well thats nice to see some compassion, but the odds are you're not going to survive, and as such be a zombie as well.

Dr Gonzo, Enid and now Jords are definately dead,
MiuMiu and Sir Dairy of Roomus are hanging on
Its only Dezzy, Happyland and I that are safe so far (hoping I havent forgotten anyone).

Risky risky plan.....

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

I forgot about the looting.
How cool would that be???
You could just nab whatever you wanted.
:D

But, DAMN YOU!
You're so right.
Those damn critic zombies!
:(

But i'd give it an owld go anyways lol.
:joker:

What would you loot first, I'd go for the obvious appliances and food, but then would go for odder items that you wouldn't ever actually buy.

Like a trouser press (although I kinda have one already) and a pinball table.

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

Oh I know.. we used to sell all types of pig body parts for dogs to chew on ; ears, trotters, penises! It is wrong, I used to hate handling them!!


The other day I was down in pet food aisle and I was just finishing it off for someone else, and I had a box, I went into another aisle and got them to come round and put it on.

[Lee.]

What would you loot first, I'd go for the obvious appliances and food, but then would go for odder items that you wouldn't ever actually buy.

Like a trouser press (although I kinda have one already) and a pinball table.

I used to think about this too.. Sometimes when walking at night, and everything is silent, I used to imagine where I would go first if the whole population had been wiped out... A kids soft play area would be one.

[Appearance_Of_A_Junky]

I used to think about this too.. Sometimes when walking at night, and everything is silent, I used to imagine where I would go first if the whole population had been wiped out... A kids soft play area would be one.

I remember once when I went to Chessington World Of Adventures as a mate worked there so got some free tickets, and I was appalled at the fact I wasn't allowed on their climbing frames and ball pits etc, it was only meant for children, I didnt even want to play near any, and it was term time so there were none there, except some angry looking clown type man that was telling me I can't.