Josie Quotes

[GiRTh]

On John-James - 'When he's in a foot ball kit I really fancy him.

On depression - 'When I'm feeling low I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a Chimpanzee'

LOL

She's cracking me up. Post your fave Josie quote.

[emilslattery]

I loved the chimpanzee on......priceless

[bansheewails]

To JJ 'You are like pastry, you roll and roll until you are to thin to use as a pie crust' :D

[AtomicKitty]

"I'm the most layback person.. I'm so layback I might be horizontal"

[bbfan1991]

"I've been living in a false sense of brain!"

:D

[Stacey.]

Can't think of any right now but there's been quite a few which have made me laugh over the last couple of days.

[bbfan1991]

“Oh great, I can just feel my fanny flaps flashing out of my knickers to the whole world"

Josie just before going to bed

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

"My claim to fame is that Ian McCaskill once gave me an award for designing a recycling bin"

Josie competes with Ben and Mario's celebrity friends

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

"I wonder if the outside world know that we're smoking dog-ends?"

Josie wonders if the tobacco shortage has been shown on TV

:laugh:

[JTM45]

“Oh great, I can just feel my fanny flaps flashing out of my knickers to the whole world"

Josie just before going to bed

:laugh2:

That's the one that caught my attention too:joker:

[bbfan1991]

"I'm cool as a cucumber and you've just made me look like a complete turnip"

Josie to John James after he "humiliates" her while playfighting

[serensilver]

When she was nominatign she said " dave because he always asks nathan when his dinneerrrrrrrrrr will be done, if he wants dineerrrrr he should cook his own dinnerrrrr!

loved the way she said dinneeeeeerrrrrr

[bbfan1991]

"I can't believe that your toes are actually attached to your feet. They look like they should be on their own"

Josie comments on Caoimhe's flexible joints

[bbfan1991]

"I know this sounds really cheesy but I feel like riding a horse on a beach"

Josie, not understanding the restrictions of the Big Brother house


PMSL:laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

"My breath smells like a portaloo"

Josie charms Ben and John James


LOL:D

[bbfan1991]

"I'm gonna bust more moves than Shakira"

Josie gets ready for her 'Day of Heaven' wake-up call

[MusicMan]

I love Josie!!
She's brilliant!
Love the chimpanzee one :D
Some great quotes in this thread :)
Can't think of any of the top of my head myself though

[daniel-lewis-1985]

"OO do yew think yew arrrrr"

I know she allways says it but it cracks me up everytime

[bbfan1991]

"I can't wait to see you in something other than your Peter Pan shorts"

Josie looks forward to seeing John James not wearing his ripped jeans

[bbfan1991]

"I've got a thing about blokes in a football kit"

Josie jokes with Nathan, Ben and John James ahead of the football task

[bbfan1991]

"You look like the Man from Delmonte"

Josie comments on Govan's outfit

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

“I had one black eye once and it looked really nice”
Josie

[MusicMan]

I love the way she says "cheeky bugger" haha
And when she said something along the lines of "I'm such a randy mare" :D

"Hey Big Bro, I'm up the duffer" :joker:

[bbfan1991]

"I didn't realise you had a John Travolta chin, Nath"

Josie comments on Nathan's features

:joker:

[Stacey.]

I love the way she says "cheeky bugger" haha
And when she said something along the lines of "I'm such a randy mare" :D

"Hey Big Bro, I'm up the duffer" :joker:

:laugh: I love it too just hearing it, but I couldn't put up with that accent for too long.

[bbfan1991]

What is wrong with me, I don't give a toss about this!"


Josie doesn't see the problem with Ben's nomination of Sunshine


:hugesmile:

[bbfan1991]

"You see! Up there for thinking, down there for dancing. Well done, my love!"

Josie congratulates Govan's puzzle skills

:D

[bbfan1991]

"I didn't want to live to an old age anyway"

Josie reveals that she is hoping to pass away before her 65th birthday

[GiRTh]

:laugh: I love it too just hearing it, but I couldn't put up with that accent for too long.Dont ever move to Bristol. They all taaaalk funny in them paaarts.

[bbfan1991]

'' I failed my driving lessons 72 times''

[daniel-lewis-1985]

'' I failed my driving test 72 times''

Im sure she actually said she had taken 72 driving lessons not tests

[bbfan1991]

Im sure she actually said she had taken 72 driving lessons not tests

Correction:blush: *goes to edit*.

[Firewire]

Nominating Sunshine 'For the sheer fact that she's tighter than a duck's ass, she gets my vote.'

[bbfan1991]

Nominating Sunshine 'For the sheer fact that she's tighter than a duck's ass, she gets my vote.'

I loved that:).

[Jordan.]

Loving the Josie quotes, everything she comes out with is hilarious :joker:

[GiRTh]

On wanting to ring John James neck - 'Thats baaad innit'

OMG she's lush. I love this girl.

[cookiemonster]

i know this has already been put in here but it was a bit longer than that.

"you're like a bit of pastry John. you just roll it and roll it and roll it until it's too thin to put on your ****ing pie"

[GiRTh]

On the incident with Sunshine - '"John, all the way from Australia, the BB beaver spotter"

[janaddy86]

I might be paraphrasing slightly here but it was something like this...

"You know what the most dangerous animal is? - Shetland pony, no kidding"

[bbfan1991]

"You've got about as much energy as a roasted chicken"

Josie on her fellow housemates' stamina levels

[nutty322]

Josie has totally got to win! so makes me laugh so much!
Loved the one about John James being like pastry.
But one that sticks in my mind, was when she said something along the lines of:

'i just realised my bum is so hairy!':joker:

[Deliverance]

Ah she is brilliant. She could have a career as a stand up comedienne.

[bbfan1991]

Do I smell?

John you're a little drama Queen:joker:.

[bbfan1991]

Some Josie quotes from a while back..

Shabby: "I've just found one of my cat's hairs on my knee"

Josie: "What...does your cat squat as well?"

"I'm a night owl..not a chicken".


They took all my knickers off me.”
Josie reacts to the opening of her suitcase

"Horse poo to me smells comforting"
Josie on her favourite scents


"I only have to look at a digestive and I put on 5 stone."

Josie talks about her difficulties with biscuits.

[NettoSuperstar!]

Ah what a great thread excellent

[bbfan1991]

About Ben's task

Josie: I've never heard of rent a crowd. Can you rent a crowd?

:joker:

[GiRTh]

'Which smells worse my feet or my breath'

[bbfan1991]

Josie telling Mario "if you get a boner don't stick it in my back"

:D

[bbfan1991]

Mario stripping to get ready for bed.. Josie : "Mario..? You're not gerrin' nakered are yew?"

[bbfan1991]

'' They could give Shabby a gold bar and it wouldn't be shiny enough'':D.

[bbfan1991]

''Is your vagina designer?"

Josie asks Caoimhe a personal question

[bbfan1991]

"I'm really good at noticing bogeys and spots"

Josie comments on her grooming skills

[JustKaz]

oops I just far ed

[Forever_Young]

Had a good laugh reading these quotes, she is so funny and don't think she realises it most of the time!!

[nutty322]

im not used to having a drink bought for me on a night out, let alone two men sat beside me

[nutty322]

haha love josie punching john james for hiding her blanket

[vesavius]

Had a good laugh reading these quotes, she is so funny and don't think she realises it most of the time!!

Thats half of her charm :)

[bbfan1991]

im not used to having a drink bought for me on a night out, let alone two men sat beside me

Bless her:blush:, she really isn't used to a so called pretty boy like JJ really liking her because he would be suited to pretty girls.

Josie is pretty:).

[vesavius]

Bless her:blush:, she really isn't used to a so called pretty boy like JJ really liking her because he would be suited to pretty girls.

Josie is pretty:).


Yeah, she has been pretty to me all series, but y'know what?

On LF today, watching her in the garden I actually started to think 'blimey...'

She looked radiant.

[bbfan1991]

I think now Josie sees JJ as a friend really:hugesmile:, he's lucky to be really close to her LOL.

[XxShortyxX]

Josie is the funniest HM in there by far, she makes me laugh sooo much :laugh:

[serensilver]

"john do you like yer teeth" claiming she'd punch him if he didnt stop tickling her!

"for the sheer fact that sunshines tighter than a ducks ass she gets my vote!

Talking to JJ " people say i look like the squirrel from ice age"

:joker::joker: gotta love her :joker::joker:

[bbfan1991]

"Oh my God, John, what are you gonna do if the bottle lands on me, you lucky bugger?"

Josie asks John if he has thought about the outcome of tonight's spin the bottle game

ROFL:D.

[vesavius]

John: "Have you had many men cum on your face Mario"

Mario: "Pretty much all of them *laughs*"

John: *laughs* "Have you had that much Josie?"

Josie (in a Southen Belle accent): "Well, I 'aint got this skin for nothin y'all..."

:joker:

[vesavius]

A bit of a paraphrase, but when she told JJ to "stop bein harsh to my lady garden" when they were talking about if she needed a trim :joker:

[vesavius]

Btw, 'Who do you think you are?", in our thickest Bristol speak, has become a pretty standard phrase around our house, and it's only week 4 :joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie asks JJ if he thinks the Rock would like her: 'He might like chunky girls and freckles"


JJ "Yeah i'll just stop by Megan Foxs house and see what's cracking"


:joker:

[bbfan1991]

'' Get your arse in her you Australian bugger''.

''He's a fully pledge Bristolian''

'' I got a brand new combine harvester and i'll give you the keys'' JJ

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie: ''I know why I'm riled up, I've needed a **** for 3 hours''.

:shocked::laugh2:

[InOne]

"Theres a troublesome Bristolian In here Big Brother what we gonna do with her"

[vesavius]

Josie: "I like strange looking men..."

Caoimhe: "what did your ex look like?"

Josie: "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle."

[toothpick]

who cares what the fat munter says, shes a thick fool

[serensilver]

who cares what the fat munter says, shes a thick fool

well you must care a bit otherwise you wouldnt have come in a thread about josie :joker:

[Kazanne]

"we get on because we both have freckles" Josie to Mario

[bbfan1991]

"You can hang around me if you want, obviously it's going to be hard for me, putting up with you"

Josie comforts Caoimhe in her own unique way following Shabby's departure

[vesavius]

Ben: "do you want to come and sit to have a cup of tea?"

Josie: "nah, we *really* need to do this"

Ben: "You can have a jaffa cake"

Josie: "OK then"



Josie showing fortitude as Ben tempts her away from cheerleader practice :D

[bbfan1991]

josie to ben - a loonatic - they go funny on a full wind....
ben to josie - on a full MOON it does things to peoples stomach like the tides that makes them go a bit funny
josie to ben - on a full moon they have extra police and nurses and stuff

:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie - I'm sick of looking like a tramp

:nono::shocked:

[bbfan1991]

'' I feel like someones just died''

:shocked::laugh:

[vesavius]

josie to ben - a loonatic - they go funny on a full wind....
ben to josie - on a full MOON it does things to peoples stomach like the tides that makes them go a bit funny
josie to ben - on a full moon they have extra police and nurses and stuff

:D


The thing is they do! lovely exchange though :D

[bbfan1991]

Josie: My Fing lady garden, is not a garden...

:laugh:

[bbfan1991]

JJ and Josie play fighting
Josie: Is that how you kick you look like a little shetland pony

:D

[vesavius]

there you go Nett :D

Wheres the Josie quotes thread gone??

"i'm havin bit of a dilemma myself..... i just had an accident in my panties" Brilliant

[NettoSuperstar!]

Ahhh been looking for that ta

[NettoSuperstar!]

Ben: "do you want to come and sit to have a cup of tea?"

Josie: "nah, we *really* need to do this"

Ben: "You can have a jaffa cake"

Josie: "OK then"



Josie showing fortitude as Ben tempts her away from cheerleader practice :D

haha yeh liked that

[-Sue-]

Josie 'keev Ive got a wedge' (robot task)

[bbfan1991]

"I'm a robot and I'm freezing cold"

Josie admits that she is feeling the chill inside her robot costume

"Can I sleep in your bed, John? It's cleaner than mine, and it's made"

Josie asks John James whether she can have a nap under his sheets

It's not about pooing yourself on Big Brother, is it?"

Josie talks to Nathan about having an accident

"You can hang around me if you want, obviously it's going to be hard for me, putting up with you"

Josie comforts Caoimhe in her own unique way following Shabby's departure

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

Josie: I don't look at John like 'oh yeah, I fancy him' but I do like having a flirt with him. He's playful, like me.

Josie: I'm so horizontal I snap on the outside world:D.

[bbfan1991]

Josie licking a large ice cream lid while John James is having a shower...

"This is like making love."


:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie Diana Shirley Gibson is Josies full name.

:laugh::)

[bbfan1991]

Josie's mum is a gypsy. She's not like an Irish traveller, but she went out with one for ten years but she couldn't travel too much because the kids are in the school. she wheels and deals in horses.


:)

[bbfan1991]

"Half a larger and lime and im anyone's"

What Josie said in her sleep:shocked::laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie "I feel like ive just been born"

LOL:laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: Custard and dragon fruit; my faaaaaaavourite!


:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie "That reminds me I should have brushed my teeth''.

:joker:

[Ithinkiloveyoutoo]

Ben" why does josie sound like she's got a snotty nose all the time?"

[bbfan1991]

'Benjaminge with a very tall fringe'

:laugh:

[vesavius]

"I'm a robot and I'm freezing cold"

Josie admits that she is feeling the chill inside her robot costume


"Can I sleep in your bed, John? It's cleaner than mine, and it's made"

Josie asks John James whether she can have a nap under his sheets


:laugh2:

two of my more recent faves :D

[bbfan1991]

"That's amazing, you're savoury on one side, you're sweet on the other. You don't have to wait for your pudding in a restaurant, bang, it's there!"

Josie praises Andrew's innovative approach to pies.

:laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

"I reckon he's a right Barry Smoothie"

Josie's thoughts of Andrew in the outside world

:D

[bbfan1991]

"You would have made a wicked Viking"

Josie wants to send Steve back in time

:laugh:

[bbfan1991]

"Mario, have you ever seen Dumb and Dumber?"

Josie to Mario after he told her he couldn't think why housemates had nominated John James

[bbfan1991]

Josie: ''I love making a ***** out of myself!''

I fake love her:D.

[bbfan1991]

"All you're doing is setting me up for ******ing humiliation"

Josie tries to halt Rachel and Caoimhe's plans to test the waters with John James

[vesavius]

"That's amazing, you're savoury on one side, you're sweet on the other. You don't have to wait for your pudding in a restaurant, bang, it's there!"

Josie praises Andrew's innovative approach to pies.

:laugh2:.

shamefully missed off the HL show, along with a couple other lines from her :joker:

[lynz]

Is this thread for particularly interesting quotes or just anything Josie says?

Today she said "Has anyone seen my jeans shirt"
Josie said. "I will wash the dishes:
Josie said: "Nathan sometimes looks like Mel Gibson"
Josie said: "I fancy JJ"

[bbfan1991]

Is this thread for particularly interesting quotes or just anything Josie says?

Today she said "Has anyone seen my jeans shirt"
Josie said. "I will wash the dishes:
Josie said: "Nathan sometimes looks like Mel Gibson"
Josie said: "I fancy JJ"

Anything really (well not everything), thanks for the quotes:).

[vesavius]

Anything really (well not everything), thanks for the quotes:).

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie to Ben about David: "I don't pretend I'm being nice & try and murder you with a sock or a Bible .... no serious, he tried to murder me ..."

:laugh2:.

[vesavius]

random girlie: "look how hot we look"

Josie: "You lot look hot, I look like a viking"


bitter funny moment they talk about their superhero poses... she has no self confidence :(

[bbfan1991]

random girlie: "look how hot we look"

Josie: "You lot look hot, I look like a viking"


bitter funny moment they talk about their superhero poses... she has no self confidence :(

I know:(. Jose needs to start thinking she is beautiful, looks aren't everything or being thin, it's what is inside what counts:blush:.

[Hero1]

I loved the comment about Keeley being superwoman, but wonderwoman is coming out and she is going to clean the bathroom till it looks newly fitted LOL

Chimpanzee comment, CLASSIC!

[bbfan1991]

Josie: "I'm going to get straight to the gym after this!"

:)

[vesavius]

What did she call them 'ladycows'? lmao

Cool yer udders! :joker:

[bbfan1991]

What did she call them 'ladycows'? lmao

Cool yer udders! :joker:

Ha Ha yes and cowbags:D.

['Conor]

(about the whole Dave saying shes fat thing"

"Maybe i overreacted because im on my period" hahaha

[vesavius]

Ha Ha yes and cowbags:D.

yes :D

[bbfan1991]

"You reckon if i make John James wife whites whiter than white, he might fancy me?"

[bbfan1991]

Josie says she was miserable when she was a size 10.

Josie: I'm doing it for the bigger ladies.

[Simone.]

"He's one sandwhich short of a picnic! He's bonkers" - about Dave!

[bbfan1991]

"You can't try and make someone feel that way about you when they obviously don't"

[Hero1]

This is my quote; Anyone who can have their on thread on a long list of their quotes is the winner of BB to me.

[bbfan1991]

Josie might get a job in an old peoples home when she leaves the house.

[Hero1]

Josie might get a job in an old peoples home when she leaves the house.

Nah, she should have her own comedy show.

[bbfan1991]

Josie to Andrew "I'm doing it for the big girls and you're doing it for the gingers"

Josie to Andrew about JJ

''No good putting butter on his penis , he wouldn't taste any better''

:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie says '' "You could get a few ladies pregnant with that bad boy couldn't you. Oh **** im supposed to be speaking posh"- to Mario

:D:joker::laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie to John James "SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!!!!!!!!!":laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie to JJ: ''I've never been a friend with a p*ick like you. I like having relationships with people who are positive...you are not that''.

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Ben: Josie do you have a question?
Josie: Do you know any Wurzel songs?

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

"I've always wanted a camera man"

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

J "Is there a name for that?"
C "Strange"

J "Is there a technical name for that?"
C "Bloody strange!"

Josie and Corin about John James saving every text and recording phone calls:D.

[LemonJam]

I loved last week with the Superhero task when she kept screaming "C'mon ya cougar bitch!" <3

[bbfan1991]

I would've run you a bath, but the bloody plug's broke!

[bbfan1991]

Phew John James is with Mario in the bathroom.. Jose is around somewhere:D.

[bbfan1991]

Josie and Corin about Andrew Stone

''Hes that one off Steps''

:joker: Wrong.

[WOMBAI]

On John-James - 'When he's in a foot ball kit I really fancy him.

On depression - 'When I'm feeling low I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a Chimpanzee'

LOL

She's cracking me up. Post your fave Josie quote.

Don't how anyone can find those funny - particularly the chimpanzee one, it makes no sense, not at all witty! She clearly said the first stupid thing that came into her head! :sleep:

[BigBrotherfan4ever]

Josie and Corin about Andrew Stone

''Hes that one off Steps''

:joker: Wrong.

Do you know something, when i first saw him yesterday, i thought that it was him.:blush:

[bbfan1991]

"I'm like Bristols biggest molester in the BB house!"

:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie to Andrew "There is no way you're a virgin. You're too dirty and too smooth."

:laugh:

[bbfan1991]

Josie to Andrew “If you weren’t 19, you’d be in a lot of trouble, young man”

:p:D

[charmingmissc]

Don't how anyone can find those funny - particularly the chimpanzee one, it makes no sense, not at all witty! She clearly said the first stupid thing that came into her head! :sleep:

it reminds her there are people worse off than she is.

[WOMBAI]

Josie to JJ: ''I've never been a friend with a p*ick like you. I like having relationships with people who are positive...you are not that''.

:joker:

She just lusts after the 'negative' ones - especially if they are a good-looking Aussie! :sleep:

[WOMBAI]

it reminds her there are people worse off than she is.

I know what it means - but people talk as if her quotes are funny - that wasn't at all funny, just silly!

[charmingmissc]

you are right, it is not funny.

[ange7]

Josie to JJ in snug after Keeva left
:"I don't hate keeva...I do feel for her"
JJ"I'll admit I thought at first she was a bitch like everyone else did but I grew to like her"
Josie:"I didn't, I thought she was nice then I realised she was a bitch"
http://s3.amazonaws.com/gc-bigthumb/coverfuH7c_1lcTe.gif
Congrats Josie. 1st, 2nd and 3rd to stick the boot into Keeva after she left.

[bbfan1991]

''I think I might be a little bit gay sometimes''...

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

"John James is as about as romantic as a fish"

:D

[bbfan1991]

Josie apologises to JJ: "Sorry if I keep accidentally touching your didgerdoo".

Probably deliberate:shocked:.

[bbfan1991]

"I have laughed so much in here. Quite a few times I've laughed till I'm crying."

:) Awww.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: Even if every one hates me out there I know every one in here loves me. Probably didn't do meself any favours with the old jealousy thing.

:(

[bbfan1991]

Corin: You cant think like a looser
Josie: Have you seen that badge up there
C: That was a one off
J: No it's not I've been locked in the bedroom since I got here

:D

[bbfan1991]

To Corin about JJ: Its not like you grabbed and aand sucked him behond a bush or anythink

:shocked::joker:

[Irishguy16]

"I'm cool as a cucumber and you've just made me look like a complete turnip"



"You know what the most dangerous animal is? - Shetland pony, no kidding"



"Oh my God, John, what are you gonna do if the bottle lands on me, you lucky bugger?



Josie: "I like strange looking men..." Caoimhe: "what did your ex look like?"
Josie: "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle."




"i'm havin bit of a dilemma myself..... i just had an accident in my panties"




"Times like this I wish I was an ostrich"

[fizzy]

don't know if it's been posted but:

"Oi Keevs, I've got a wedge"

and

"I'm a size 18 now, Dave would have you believe"

"I'm doing it for the big girls, I like to think I cater to the other end of the market"

[yellowzebra8]

My faves...

On her friends: I said to my friend, he can sell a story if he wants, because he wants to buy a sex swing

On getting old: I don't want to live long, maybe 68

On positive mental attitude (aka the best quote ever): Do you know what, when i'm feeling a bit low I always remember that woman that got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee

On horses: I had these friends at school... when they came round, the horse got a hard-on and chased them round the garden. Chad was his name. He's dead now, bless him.

On her pets: I used to have a billy goat. It wasn't a normal one... he had fire in his eyes

On sex: I didn't realise oral was just with your mouth

On booze: I'm a right randy mare when i've had a few largers

On fashion: I'm not one of those fashion types, because I couldn't give a sh*t. No style, I just wear whats been marked down in the shop

On big nights out: When i'm really out of it, I turn into my alter ego... a cross between a b*tch and Stacey Solomon

On her time in the house: This is the longest detox i've been on since I was 12

On missing Govan: Govan, if you're watching this, then I want my little man back. Try and break through the back door. I'll let you in. Come back to Mummy, quickly.

On pregnancy: Big Bro, I'm up the dufferrrr!

[bbfan1991]

Thanks!:D:hugesmile:.

[bbfan1991]

To Corin: "You're looking pretty darn fine - you should be issued a parking ticket."

Josie tells Laura: "I won't have Davina, I'll have men in white coats waiting for me."

:D

[bbfan1991]

''Andrew, I don't want Social Services knocking at my door, stop it!''


:joker:

[fizzy]

''Andrew, I don't want Social Services knocking at my door, stop it!''


:joker:

classic

[bbfan1991]

"I turn into a randy mare when he touches my arm. He accidentally stroked my boob last night. I thought a firework went off."


TMI:joker:

[bbfan1991]

"Bring it on Pepper, you're messing with the Gibson now"

"You only bin 'ere five mintues, stop messing with my yard"

:D

[oddballmisfitsFTW]

My faves...

On her friends: I said to my friend, he can sell a story if he wants, because he wants to buy a sex swing

On getting old: I don't want to live long, maybe 68

On positive mental attitude (aka the best quote ever): Do you know what, when i'm feeling a bit low I always remember that woman that got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee

On horses: I had these friends at school... when they came round, the horse got a hard-on and chased them round the garden. Chad was his name. He's dead now, bless him.

On her pets: I used to have a billy goat. It wasn't a normal one... he had fire in his eyes

On sex: I didn't realise oral was just with your mouth

On booze: I'm a right randy mare when i've had a few largers

On fashion: I'm not one of those fashion types, because I couldn't give a sh*t. No style, I just wear whats been marked down in the shop

On big nights out: When i'm really out of it, I turn into my alter ego... a cross between a b*tch and Stacey Solomon

On her time in the house: This is the longest detox i've been on since I was 12

On missing Govan: Govan, if you're watching this, then I want my little man back. Try and break through the back door. I'll let you in. Come back to Mummy, quickly.

On pregnancy: Big Bro, I'm up the dufferrrr!


none of them are funny in the slightest

the chimpanzee quote that she repeats over and over is a gimmick she thought of before she went in

part of her sh***y gameplan

[bbfan1991]

"Look at loverboy, grinning like the cat that got the cream waiting for me"

[bbfan1991]

Josie accuses Sam of putting garlic back in her pillowcases. He comes over and burps very loudly in her face. She shouts: "Sam! Don't do things like that, that's disgusting!" As the two trade jibes,

Josie says: "You're going down. I've got five brothers, I could go all night!"

:joker:

[ashlee-s-]

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000878606384#!/pages/JOSIE-TO-WIN-BIG-BROTHER-11/134851126525674?ref=ts please join and support josie and invite your friends please xxx

[bbfan1991]

Josie "You know in Thailand they eat cockroaches"

John James "What you trying to say"

J "You'd be pretty nice fried in sugar"

[bbfan1991]

Josie- Dont try to get round me (as he snuggles her neck and kisses her cheek)
John James (into her mic) I love you Josie
Josie- Oh ok then - I'm so easily pulled round

[bbfan1991]

J: ''Not the batty whole''

:joker:

[Forever_Young]

Love this thread! Some classic quotes :)

what was the one when dave was pretty naked, think he'd been getting spray tanned and she got too much of an eyefull when he bent over and said something like

'dave I know your holy but thats taking the piss'

haha!

[bbfan1991]

"Got to put conditioner on my hair or it goes well wild...bit like myself"

:D

[bbfan1991]

"John James looks so angry, sort your boat race out...."

:joker:

[yellowzebra8]

none of them are funny in the slightest

the chimpanzee quote that she repeats over and over is a gimmick she thought of before she went in

part of her sh***y gameplan

Why are you even on this thread if you don't like Josie and don't find any of her quotes funny?
Last time I looked this was a thread for Josie's memorable quotes and these were the ones that made me laugh. Just because your sense of humour is different to mine doesn't give you the right to quote my favourite lines and try and make me feel dumb.
Lighten up.

[Forever_Young]

I agree yellowzebra8. No reason for the haters to even come in here and mock. some are just so obsessed with Josie.

I find her one liners so funny, love this thread :)

[bbfan1991]

"I don't know how I got my job. I haven't got a GSCE. They didn't know that...well they do now."

Lmao:laugh:.

[tomato ketchup]

"

"Times like this I wish I was an ostrich"

This one is my favourite :D Haha
She better win :)

[bbfan1991]

The only people who know my real name are the police:joker:.

Josie Diane Shirley Gibson

[bbfan1991]

I know you share a bed and all that.....but I dont think I've even looked at it in that much detail...

About Andrew's spray paint picture of Mario:joker:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: Steve, what are you doing in the toilet for so long, having a baby?
Steve: No I'm trying to put my leg back on.

PMSL:laugh2:.

[Braden]

'Can I have a Magnum...please?'

[bbfan1991]

Sam gets in bed with Josie and John James and asks them why they haven't snogged yet

Josie's response: "I try and dish them out...it's like trying to feed a vegetarian meat''

:laugh2:

[WOMBAI]

Sam gets in bed with Josie and John James and asks them why they haven't snogged yet

Josie's response: "I try and dish them out...it's like trying to feed a vegetarian meat''

:laugh2:

Which only goes to prove - he doesn't want to kiss her. Don't blame him!

So much for the 'romance'!

[Showstopper]

Which only goes to prove - he doesn't want to kiss her. Don't blame him!

So much for the 'romance'!

Once John James leaves the house (either as victor or evicted) and if he turns around and says he does fancy Josie and wants a relationship, will you then accept the romance is real ?

[Forever_Young]

Which only goes to prove - he doesn't want to kiss her. Don't blame him!

So much for the 'romance'!

Oh Wombai, you seem to appear on every single thread about Josie and say the same thing!! :nono: This is a thread where we appreciate all the great things she says that make us laugh :) Non of your biased negativity please!!!

[bbfan1991]

JJ2 - you're the biggest lightweight in here Josie!

J - Yeah I give it Charlie Big Bollocks

:D

[ashlee-s-]

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/pages/JOSIE-TO-WIN-BIG-BROTHER-11/134851126525674?ref=ts please join and support josie and invite your friends please :) xx

[bbfan1991]

"It's not about flicking bogies in the love of your life's shoes is it?"

:joker:

[Strictly Jake]

im a one woman man- hahaha

[bbfan1991]

''OMG thats like something out of a horror movie'' About a box suspended on a lever in the garden.

[astrozombiee]

Bb: You have to choose between the two love's of your life.
Josie: Wat, food and John James?
Not sure if thats already been posteed

[astrozombiee]

On the Davinna McCaw task:
BB: Corin said John James was like a giant what flying around her head?
Josie: Cock!

[astrozombiee]

I posted this in the "epic josie quotes" bit - Most of them have been put her but oh well..
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Im not a pahticular josie fan butttt:::
On her kissing abilites: It's probably like kissing a chopped turnip.
On her weight - Do you think a wasp flying into my cereal is a sign I need to stop eating?
To JJ - If this show went on for anothe 6 months I would probably sexually harrass John James.
To JohnJames - would you still share a bed with me if I had no top lip?
On After BB - When I come out I might just be hippy for a bit.
To Andrew, in the panto horse task- Your like Mr Ed gone wrong
To JohnJames, natch - Where's your didgeridoo?
To JohnJames - Some days you look mega young; like I feel a bit wrong, young.
To JohnJames - Are you shampoo-ing and conditionin your armpits?
To JohnJames - Do you want a drink, something to eat, a massage... massage ... massage...get a haircut?
Last night I would have given the top of my index finger to have been somewhereelse
To Rachel & Caomihe - All youre doing is *******in setting me up for humiliation
To Andrew - That's amazing, you're savoury on one side, you're sweet on the other. You don't have to wait for your pudding in a restrant, bang, it's there!
On Andrew - I reckon he's a right Barry smoothie.
To Steve - You wouldave made a wikid Viking.
To Ben - Whats Catholicism?
To JohnJames - When we're lying in bed it's like Beauty &+ The Geek
To Caomhie - I can't believe Caoimhe that your name is spelt the way you spell it. Thats mad innee?
In the robot cozzie - I'm a robot and Im freezin cold!

[bbfan1991]

"You can suck my balls!" when arguing with John James:joker:.

[NettoSuperstar!]

And people wonder why we love Josie! Anyone who doesnt piss themselves at them quotes has sense of humour issues

[bbfan1991]

"I don't like you 16% of the time"
Josie has a very precise idea of her feelings for John James

"Pepper pot, keep an eye on this one; he's the best mole in the UK right now."
Josie tells Sam to make sure Mario the mole doesn't sabotage the briefcase task

"It's probably like kissing a chopped turnip."
Josie on her kissing abilities

Do you think a wasp flying into my cereal is a sign that I need to stop eating?"
Josie worries about the meaning behind a recent visit from a wasp

"If this show went on for another six months I would probably sexually harass John James"
Josie to JJ during a discussion about the show being extended

"Would you still share a bed with me if I had no top lip?"
Josie leaves John James speechless after her unusal question

"When I come out I might just be a hippy for a bit"
Josie plans her post-BB life

"You're like Mr Ed gone wrong"
Josie teases fellow horsemate Andrew

"Where’s your didgeridoo?"
Josie wants to get acquainted with John James's down under

"Have you been shampooing and conditioning your armpit hairs?"
Josie notices John James's body hair is unusually soft

"Do you want a drink, something to eat, a massage... massage... massage...get a haircut?"
Josie offers her services to John James


:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

" Andrew you've got more moves than Usher !"


As Andrew, Mario and JJ recreate the Consider Yourself routine:D.

[bbfan1991]

Josie complains about putting on weight. "It goes all to my legs and my bum," she says. "I'm built like a Christmas tree."

[Jackie]

Josie complains about putting on weight. "It goes all to my legs and my bum," she says. "I'm built like a Christmas tree."


:joker:

[reece(:]

In the diary room what's the 2 things you love the most?
"john james and food"

[have a laugh]

Josie on her "ladygarden"
"its like a bushtucker trial down there" lol this was last night on live feed when she was talking to jj

[bbfan1991]

Josie: "I’d rather someone give me a real beating than break my heart."

[bbfan1991]

Josie on her "ladygarden"
"its like a bushtucker trial down there" lol this was last night on live feed when she was talking to jj

PMSL I did hear that one:joker::laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: "I bet [Corin] is down the hairdressers today getting herself some proper hair extensions."

Lmao:D.

[bbfan1991]

Dave "Would you move to London if he moved to London?"

Josie "I would move anywhere if John James was there.."

"Even Iraq"

:nono:

[bbfan1991]

Josie nominating biscuits.
'I nominate the Rich Tea because when you dunk it you're always on edge... the other day I dunked it and half fell off in my tea.'
'So my first nomination is a custard cream and my second is a rich tea.'

Ha Ha:joker::laugh2:.

[bbfan1991]

''It's a greedy little bastard it's got two waffers but still wants to be filled with custard cream it's greedy I dont like greedy bastards. Yip my nomination is gonna be for the custard cream''.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: ''My second nomination a rich tea...I dont wanna do it I dont wanna do it.... there is nothing on top no chocolate on top no smarties nothing....there is nothing very rich about having nothing on top''.

[bbfan1991]

Josie on Their Perfect Day: ''Lets not get our hopes up that tree is ****er he'd probably have us shoveling **** around the garden''.


:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie: They dont call me the South West sex pest for nothing
'Lick my batty crease monk face'

:joker:


We used to have horse **** fights all the time....can't beat a bit of horse ****.

:D

J: I cant wait to get out to wash my minge
JJ2: ****ing hell Jose!

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

On the messiness of the house "I'm a bit muddly but I'm not durrrttty"

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

Josie saying she loves Larry Lamb too and she couldn't choose between him and George.

[bbfan1991]

"Did you watch that programme about men that like hairy women? Went abroad and everything to find them. "


:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

Jo the Hairdresser: What are you gonna do when you get out?

J: See John James, see my friends and family and get a job!

[have a laugh]

Josie: They dont call me the South West sex pest for nothing
'Lick my batty crease monk face'

:joker:


We used to have horse **** fights all the time....can't beat a bit of horse ****.

:D

J: I cant wait to get out to wash my minge
JJ2: ****ing hell Jose!

:laugh2:






Hillarious I sdaw that on LF

[bbfan1991]

LOL Josie on setting up a Barber's Shop

J: ''I'd love that, chatting to people all day. Obviously you'd have to cut a bit of hair''...

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie thinks UBB starts 3 days after the final.

Little does she realise:laugh:.

[bbfan1991]

LOL Josie: John James tried to run away once


Shouldn't that be more than:D:joker:.

[bbfan1991]

Josie: They should get a before and after picture...

Definetly:hugesmile:.

[bbfan1991]

Dave: 'No wonder that Australian was kissing you under the dooners"
Josie: "I smoothed him over with my humour"


:joker:

[bbfan1991]

''Do you like a finger up the bum, Andrew?"

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

Josie: Simon from Blue singing my name in an exclusive song!

:D

[bbfan1991]

"Cor, even thinking about tomorrow my heart is about to jump out my chest," Josie says. "I don't think I'll piddle my pants this time though."

LOL:joker:.

[bbfan1991]

''Imagine John James taking you out on a date, it'd be the Drive-Thru at McDonalds"

:joker:

[bbfan1991]

Josie: I think I need to get some practice in I nearly crumbled even then (on her interview with Davina McCaw)

[bbfan1991]

"I can't wait to get out of here now"


You'll hopefully win and be going back in there:p.

[bbfan1991]

J:"I'll share a hotel room with John James....If his mum lets us"

LOL:joker:

[astrozombiee]

Last night was the best food I ever eatann', this is the best haircut and the best colour I ever had, these are the best sunglasses I ever owned, this is the best nail polish I ever wore...SIMON from BLUE took off his RayBans & gave them to me...
JJ: I'd never have known.
Josie: Sorree :D

[bbfan1991]

Josie asks Brian if he still sees Nadia.

"She's over there" he says.

Josie meant Narinder

:joker:

[astrozombiee]

When Andrew, Andrew Stone & Dave were singing their song,
Josie: Know any songs by The Wurzels?

[bbfan1991]

When Andrew, Andrew Stone & Dave were singing their song,
Josie: Know any songs by The Wurzels?

LOL:D.

On tonights show: '' I watch shark attack videos on Youtube''

:laugh2:

[bbfan1991]

From Josie's interview with Emma Willis on the BB website:

" I was just going to the pub. I knew that you just got out of here and turned right. Then i would have to convince the barman i had one a bit of money and that i would pay him back."

:laugh:

[bbfan1991]

In interview just with Davina

dav: Is it love?
Jose: Yeah I think so
Dav: We're all so happy for you
Jose: What about George? (Lamb)

:D