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View Full Version : The Chat-Up Line Thread

Benjamin
13-10-2010, 10:44 PM
A place for everyone to leave their best (or worst) chat-up lines for those less lucky in pulling.

(keep them clean!):hugesmile:
Niamh.
14-10-2010, 09:12 AM
Chat up lines are awful but here's one anyway to get you started Mr.Turtle!

Excuse me I lost my phone number can I borrow yours?
Fetch The Bolt Cutters
14-10-2010, 09:45 AM
ooh ooh ive got one....

GET IN THE VAN IVE GOT A KNIFE!
Niamh.
14-10-2010, 09:45 AM
ooh ooh ive got one....

GET IN THE VAN IVE GOT A KNIFE!

:joker: I bet that one always works!
Jessica.
14-10-2010, 10:17 AM
ooh ooh ive got one....

GET IN THE VAN IVE GOT A KNIFE!

omg :love:
ILoveTRW
14-10-2010, 10:22 AM
"I may not be the best looking guy in this club, but I'm the only one talking to you"
Niamh.
14-10-2010, 10:31 AM
"I may not be the best looking guy in this club, but I'm the only one talking to you"

aw, that's awful!!
Fetch The Bolt Cutters
14-10-2010, 10:33 AM
'scream and il break your neck'
Josy
14-10-2010, 02:01 PM
ooh ooh ive got one....

GET IN THE VAN IVE GOT A KNIFE!

:joker:
Benjamin
14-10-2010, 09:07 PM
ooh ooh ive got one....

GET IN THE VAN IVE GOT A KNIFE!


:laugh2:
Legend killer
14-10-2010, 09:15 PM
The two most sucessfull for me are

Your name must be Gillette? the best a man can get
Are your legs hurting cos you've been running threw my mind all night long(the one i used on my girlfreind)

And if i am feeling extra confident i whip out
If you were my homework I'd be doing you rite now all over my desk
Tom
14-10-2010, 10:20 PM
nice legs, what time do they open?
MTVN
14-10-2010, 10:28 PM
"Nice shirt, it would look better on my bedroom floor"

"Do you work for Royal Mail? No? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package"

I'm clearly a master :hugesmile:
Twilight
14-10-2010, 10:31 PM
nice legs, what time do they open?
ROFL :love:
Miss Ivy Balls
14-10-2010, 11:08 PM
"Can I buy you another drink? Don't worry, I won't spike it. ;)"

My names bond, love-bond.

You smell, fancy a wash? I've got a double shower back at mine.

Fancy Sex On The Beach?
Stacey.
14-10-2010, 11:16 PM
You smell, fancy a wash?

I think they'd be saying this to you.

Then just exit the bar and leave you there. :pat:
Ithinkiloveyoutoo
14-10-2010, 11:20 PM
Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?
Miss Ivy Balls
14-10-2010, 11:28 PM
I need the toilet, on your head or in your mouth? :0 :L
Ithinkiloveyoutoo
14-10-2010, 11:30 PM
I need the toilet, on your head or in your mouth? :0 :L

Response-what the hell first you tell me i smell and ask me if I fancy a wash then you want to **** in my mouth?!?:shocked:

[slaps him, then knees him in the nuts then pours drink on his head]
King Gizzard
14-10-2010, 11:52 PM
Your eyes are like a spanner everytime I see them my nuts tighten
GypsyGoth
14-10-2010, 11:53 PM
If you are what you eat, I could be you by morning.
Ithinkiloveyoutoo
15-10-2010, 12:03 AM
Boy-"There's a bomb!"
Club shouts and evacuates. Boy grabs girls hand. He stops her
"Girl YOU'RE the bomb!" he clarifies.
Girl slaps boy and tells security it was a false alarm. Boy gets kicked out and banned for life.
Miss Ivy Balls
15-10-2010, 12:46 AM
On a note, I don't chat people up.

I don't go out enough to do it, and don't go the right places. If I go out then it is most probably a country pub or mates.

Secondly, I wouldn't know what to say and probably say something wrong.
King Gizzard
15-10-2010, 12:47 AM
You just use the Leamington charm to lure people in
Josy
15-10-2010, 12:49 AM
Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?

:o :laugh:
Miss Ivy Balls
15-10-2010, 12:50 AM
You just use the Leamington charm to lure people in

What is that?

My mum and dad have a business in Leamington and I have mates there, but don't really see them - if that makes sense. :/

I just stay in my room most of the time and go work. That is about my life. :joker:
Benjamin
15-10-2010, 12:51 AM
LOL, Thomas, please tell me you never use those chat-up lines :)
Miss Ivy Balls
15-10-2010, 01:15 AM
LOL, Thomas, please tell me you never use those chat-up lines :)

No. I don't chat up people anyway. I flirt, sometimes. I don't really go out much. I don't like nightclubs because you're crammed in by big fat blokes who smell of BO. Just too busy and really loud music that is often ****.

I just like doing my own thing.

So, no, I don't use those chat up lines. Stuff just normally comes out of my mouth. I say stuff before I think, but most of the time I know the wrong and right stuff to say. I just make myself look a fool most of the time, but I don't really care. :)
Ithinkiloveyoutoo
15-10-2010, 12:11 PM
Did you fall from Heaven? Because you might be Satan and I like a bit of devil me I do!
Niamh.
15-10-2010, 12:16 PM
funniest story I heard about chat up lines was this one.You just reminded me of it IThinkILoveYoutoo. A guy I worked with years ago was telling me that he went up to a girl and asked "did it hurt?" and she said "What? When I fell from heaven? No." and he said "well it looks like it did!!!":laugh2:
Ithinkiloveyoutoo
15-10-2010, 12:29 PM
funniest story I heard about chat up lines was this one.You just reminded me of it IThinkILoveYoutoo. A guy I worked with years ago was telling me that he went up to a girl and asked "did it hurt?" and she said "What? When I fell from heaven? No." and he said "well it looks like it did!!!":laugh2:

lmao. Massive fail. :joker: In that case it makes it sound like he's saying she looks rough.

Men shouldn't bother with chat up lines it's a huge turn off for me....unless he's so fit and beyond my league, I forgive him then. :D
Niamh.
15-10-2010, 12:32 PM
lmao. Massive fail. :joker: In that case it makes it sound like he's saying she looks rough.

Men shouldn't bother with chat up lines it's a huge turn off for me....unless he's so fit and beyond my league, I forgive him then. :D

Yes he was because she was not very nice about him chatting her up!

lmao yeah, whatever happened to "Hi" would work just fine as long you liked the person and if you don't a chat up line isn't going to change that!!
Jordan.
15-10-2010, 12:37 PM
I think they'd be saying this to you.

Then just exit the bar and leave you there. :pat:

funniest story I heard about chat up lines was this one.You just reminded me of it IThinkILoveYoutoo. A guy I worked with years ago was telling me that he went up to a girl and asked "did it hurt?" and she said "What? When I fell from heaven? No." and he said "well it looks like it did!!!":laugh2:

:joker::joker:
Legend killer
15-10-2010, 03:13 PM
There are 256 bones in your body! Would u like another

I've just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot
Benjamin
16-10-2010, 12:44 AM
There are 256 bones in your body! Would u like another





LOL, I have never heard that one before, and I have heard many :)
Iceman
16-10-2010, 12:46 AM
I used some horrendous ones last night.......actually not even chat up lines, just nonsense
Josy
16-10-2010, 12:46 AM
There are 256 bones in your body! Would u like another


:joker:
Benjamin
16-10-2010, 12:51 AM
I used some horrendous ones last night.......actually not even chat up lines, just nonsense




:laugh2: Same for me, I try and speak and it just comes out as verbal poo, and yet somehow it still works. God knows how.