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Joe.
23-10-2011, 07:33 AM
Absolutely cracks me up-

here's some of her highlights-

The python I am performing with later has just tried to swallow the sloth like one from Rhythmix.

Stress can kill me, if you don't vote for me, you are basically trying to murder me!! #Xfactor

I'm singing 'Oh so quiet' apparently it's how they anticipate the voting lines being #Xfactor

I'm doing a survey this morning, if you like cats then text KITTY to 88333. This is legitimate research and nothing to do with the X Factor!

To knock me out of the show text KITTY to 88333 (5-10 times to be sure)

Competition time. 5 letter word meaning 'a fund of money for communal use'. Text your answer to 88333

Competition time. 5 letter word for 'a child's name for a kitten or cat'. Text your answer to 88333

Jonathan Ross has forgotten his daughter's name. He knows that it's Betty something. If you know what it is, text him on 88333 to tell him

I've just spoken to Justin Bieber, he wants his fans to text the word KITTY to 88333 to prove their love for him

Thank you so much for your votes, the goldfish lives for another week x

Received a sweet gift in the post from someone called 'Die Bitch!'. Nice gesture but unfortunately the rat appears to have died en route.

Hi @Cher, I'm a big deal in the UK and soon to be a big deal in the US too. I need a backing singer on my world tour, Interested?

Hi @TheRealXtina, are you willing to audition to become an official Kitty Brokenail impersonator? Need it sorted b4 I hit the big time.

I've just beat Marcus Collins and Craig Colton at arm wrestling. Might not be so lucky with Sami Brookes

Hey @LadyGaga, do you want to sing a duet with me in the final of X Factor? Hope you don't mind playing second fiddle to a true star.

Janet Devlin going to get the sympathy vote after her grandad died. I'm trying to find a relative willing to make the ultimate sacrifice too

:joker::joker:

Jordan.
23-10-2011, 10:14 AM
Frankie Cockooza is funny too


FrankieCockozza Frankie Cockozza
This week has been all about charity. Yes, I ****ed the ugly one from Rhythmix. Very charitable of me.

:joker:

Marc
23-10-2011, 11:27 AM
I love this page :laugh:

Black Dagger
23-10-2011, 11:28 AM
Nobody beats Katie Weasel in her prime...

Some amusing tweets though.

Marc
23-10-2011, 11:30 AM
Nobody beats Katie Weasel in her prime...

Some amusing tweets though.

She's still amazing! I love her :laugh:

FrankieCockozza

My voice might not be perfect but I've got a very talented tongue...just ask Janet!!:joker:

Lewis.
24-10-2011, 08:31 AM
There is a Sami shaped hole in the mansion this morning. Either that or that's where they're putting the swimming pool.

:laugh:

Dear of her!

Marc
24-10-2011, 08:37 AM
There is a Sami shaped hole in the mansion this morning. Either that or that's where they're putting the swimming pool.

:laugh:

Dear of her!

:laugh2: that one's brilliant! ^

Have woken up this morning with a massive weight off my shoulders. Yes, now Sami is gone, I no longer have to give her piggybacks

Marc
24-10-2011, 08:40 AM
Hey @kylieminogue, call 09016161607 now or I might be forced to tell people that we share a botox doctor

[Sami's going to regret leaving her phone lying around. I managed to call my voting number 83 times before she realised it was missing

[If your parents won't let you call 09016161607, they don't love you FACT! #XFactor #teamkitkat

I have a call centre in India calling night and day!! RT @PerrieEdwardsx: @KittyBrokenail 09016161607 have you called it yet? #XFactor

.@BrunoMars honey, you will need to call 09016161607 so that security will know to let you in for the show #XFactor #teamkitkat

Hey @FrankieCocozza apparently your STD test results are through, call 09016161607 to get them! X #teamkitkat #XFactor

.@janetjealousy sweety Frankie said you should call him on 09016161607 apparently he reeeeally like you :-) xx #XFactor #teamkitkat

:laugh3:

Marc
24-10-2011, 08:48 AM
KellyPoundland :

I've just hidden Tulisa's tracksuit. Girl is pissed!

I was gonna steal Tulisa's loyalty card for JD Sports but thought that might be going too far.

PUT IT DOWN... if you pick up the phone to vote for Kitty. RT "@cillfly: @KellyPoundland any words of wisdom for the voting public?"

Was walking down the street when this girl called Sophie Habieber or something came up to me. I was like "Am I sposed to know who y'all are"

(n'awww :( the last one)

Jordan.
14-11-2011, 07:47 PM
KittyBrokenail
If you believe that Justin Bieber did NOT father that baby, then text the word 'Kitty' to 88333

KittyBrokenail
To vote for Marcus, text 'Kitty' to 88333


KatieWeasel
Frankie said he did 6 lines during his time on the X Factor, that's more than Wagner managed to sing last year!

KatieWeasel
Dramatic news: Little Mix replaces one of it's members....
http://p.twimg.com/Ad0zWxaCEAAX9RU.jpg


FrankieCockozza
Amelia is grateful to be back in the competition. I was grateful to be back in Amelia #xtrafactor

KellyPoundland Kelly Rowland
Who the **** were those girls that just performed? Whoever they were they got confetti in my weave. Mama is pissed.

MishaQueenB
Lady Gaga was planning on singing 'Marry the night on tonight's X factor.. Until I decided I wanted to sing that one.. I made her change

:joker::joker:

Saph
14-11-2011, 08:36 PM
are they real twitter accounts? :laugh2:

Harry!
14-11-2011, 08:50 PM
I love Misha B's one


We've been asked to donate anything that we don't need anymore to be burnt on the bonfire later. I've given them Kitty's clothes.



Just helping Janet practice bobbing for apples for tonight's Bonfire party at @XFactorMansion. So far I've ducked her head under 670 times.



Janet is now bald.. And i have a lovely new ginger weave.. She kindly agreed to donate her hair..after I'd pulled it all out




For some reason these bitches from Rhythmix are refusing to carry me around the studio on their backs. They need to be punished.




That awkward moment when Lady Gaga met @LittleMixx and asked "can I pet your sloth"


<3

https://twitter.com/#!/MishaQueenB

Jordan.
02-12-2011, 05:14 PM
http://i.imgur.com/Solvn.png

:joker::joker::joker:

Firewire
02-12-2011, 05:17 PM
KatieWeasel is better.

KellyPoundland is great too.