Messed Up Feelings..

[Munchkins]

I'm copying my posts from the sexuality thread and adding some more, but i really feel like making a thread about how i feel, to see if anyone else feels the same, it's just so odd
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I absolutely love men ok, that's clear, i am so attracted to them :hugesmile:
However though as much as i like men, i dont ever think i want to date and its really difficult. The thought of me succombing and allowing myself to completely be someones other half, makes me just feel ill, i just never want to give myself to someone.. and it's not just about being scared of getting hurt, which i am! i just could never desire to wanting to be someones forever.. and having that full time commitment which is just awful, i like my independence, and i just don't think id ever fit a relationship.

Also my OCD is so bad, and i think i'd always judge someone? id never feel they were good enough, i'd always pick faults in either them, to get myself out of the situation, or would think i'm not good enough, no matter how much they liked me.. and im just too clingy id either be standoffish in an effort not to be.. or would just be an irritant.
basically im not cut out to date someone, and thats just how it is
And it all just hit me last night, i was just laying in bed and i just thought omfg i never ever want to date someone? even if someone was perfect in every shape or form, id never want to be with them romantically or anything, yeah i may find them sexually attractive, but thats all, i still wouldn't do anything with them, it just repulses me :(

People may say you're only 16 you can't know for sure, but i do and its quite a depressing thought that i will live alone and eventhough i'm fine with it, it is going to be odd and i don't know how people will react. I can't define myself as Asexual i dont think, because i do find people sexually attractive just i'd never want to be with someone, like i could kiss someone, but i would never want it to go further than that ever, and so i dont even want to kiss people as its leading them on? as i will never go further. People know they're gay at 16, so how can i know i dont want to be with someone
No-one else i know feels the same and this thread is so incoherent but still:(

If you read this essay i applaud you LOL

[Drew.]

you need to applaud me

[Apple202]

tl dr :sleep:

[Apple202]

oj love you x

[Ninastar]

when I was 16, I said if I was gay i'd kill myself

honestly, don't worry about it. things like this take a long ass time to sort out

[Stu]

You're a late bloomer. You're not going to be the person that's in a different relationship every year. Every few months. That's far from a bad thing.

All these fears you have about being too critical of people, not thinking you're good enough etc ... that's all the stuff that vanishes when you do eventually meet someone you really give a damn about.

I know it's hard to imagine but unless you plan on spending the rest of your life alone in your bedroom you will eventually run in to someone who will challenge you and change you for the better.

[Kazanne]

You're young yet and it's good to be independant at such a young age and nothing wrong with not wanting to give yourself to anyone yet,when you meet the right person that will all come,hats off to you for your saying what is on your mine,Do whatever makes you happy,whether it fits in with the stereotypical teenager or not,be youself,be different ,just be happy.

[Munchkins]

You're a late bloomer. You're not going to be the person that's in a different relationship every year. Every few months. That's far from a bad thing.

All these fears you have about being too critical of people, not thinking you're good enough etc ... that's all the stuff that vanishes when you do eventually meet someone you really give a damn about.

I know it's hard to imagine but unless you plan on spending the rest of your life alone in your bedroom you will eventually run in to someone who will challenge you and change you for the better.

I've been with one person for a while (well i was only like 14/15 but still!), and after he cheated on me and stuff, ironically because i wouldn't do anything sexually, it repulsed me (tmi) that probably did make me critical of everything, but i just genuinely do think i will never want to go with someone
it would be nice to change though, but i doubt it

[Jack_]

There's no use worrying about it cause you'll only make yourself feel worse. Just take life as it comes, the chances are highly likely that one day you'll meet someone who you'll just have a connection with, and it'll get to the point where you'll either be so far ahead of where you are now that you'll go with it anyway or you won't be able to help going with it even if you don't want to. I genuinely believe that. This is long-term I'm talking here, not in the next year. But then who knows?

Just accept how you are for now and understand that in the future things will come along that'll question what you've instilled in yourself and could possibly change all of this completely. There is nothing to gain from thinking twenty, thirty years ahead about the possibility of being alone because of the feelings you've described. Nobody can see that far into the future.

[Munchkins]

Thanks everyone who commented :love:
good to know some people actually took the time to read it, ive tried to explaining to real life friends but they think its slutty not wanting commitment :L

[Marcus.]

Thanks everyone who commented :love:
good to know some people actually took the time to read it, ive tried to explaining to real life friends but they think its slutty not wanting commitment :L

it your choice for what ever you do

[Mystic Mock]

I'm copying my posts from the sexuality thread and adding some more, but i really feel like making a thread about how i feel, to see if anyone else feels the same, it's just so odd
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
I absolutely love men ok, that's clear, i am so attracted to them :hugesmile:
However though as much as i like men, i dont ever think i want to date and its really difficult. The thought of me succombing and allowing myself to completely be someones other half, makes me just feel ill, i just never want to give myself to someone.. and it's not just about being scared of getting hurt, which i am! i just could never desire to wanting to be someones forever.. and having that full time commitment which is just awful, i like my independence, and i just don't think id ever fit a relationship.

Also my OCD is so bad, and i think i'd always judge someone? id never feel they were good enough, i'd always pick faults in either them, to get myself out of the situation, or would think i'm not good enough, no matter how much they liked me.. and im just too clingy id either be standoffish in an effort not to be.. or would just be an irritant.
basically im not cut out to date someone, and thats just how it is
And it all just hit me last night, i was just laying in bed and i just thought omfg i never ever want to date someone? even if someone was perfect in every shape or form, id never want to be with them romantically or anything, yeah i may find them sexually attractive, but thats all, i still wouldn't do anything with them, it just repulses me :(

People may say you're only 16 you can't know for sure, but i do and its quite a depressing thought that i will live alone and eventhough i'm fine with it, it is going to be odd and i don't know how people will react. I can't define myself as Asexual i dont think, because i do find people sexually attractive just i'd never want to be with someone, like i could kiss someone, but i would never want it to go further than that ever, and so i dont even want to kiss people as its leading them on? as i will never go further. People know they're gay at 16, so how can i know i dont want to be with someone
No-one else i know feels the same and this thread is so incoherent but still:(

If you read this essay i applaud you LOL

I get what your saying Munchkins, but I don't think people would give up on you due to your OCD behavior, and also you've got more of a chance of getting boyfriend than me ever getting a girlfriend as I'm just too weird for people.:hugesmile:

But then me and other people have said I'm a bit messed up anyway.:joker:

All I can say is Munchkins is that you'll find yourself eventually.

[Stu]

It's quite possible of course that you're completely normal and simply reveling in your own image as a mental nutter, Mock :joker:.

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

In Year 1 of Primary School I smashed a girls head down on the table for no reason whatsoever

.

[Mystic Mock]

.

See even Scott knows I'm nuts, although that was a behavior of a thug what I did, I would never do that again.

[Apple202]

.

:joker:

[Munchkins]

I threw sand from the sandpit in someones eyes in year reception :pp and i'm not a nutcase ;) (or maybe i am)

[Stu]

Year one of primary school. So one would be what ... 5? 6? Boys and girls always beat each other up at that age.

Relax. You're not exactly Virginia Tech.

[Jake.]

Aw Munch, you're not going to feel like that forever, you will eventually get to a stage where it all goes

[Munchkins]

Aw Munch, you're not going to feel like that forever, you will eventually get to a stage where it all goes

Hmmm maybe, its just quite depressing and it keeps hitting me! D;

[armand.kay]

I feel you! I don't really trust people enough to get in a proper relationship I've only been out with one person and that was just a physical attraction I've never really opened myself up to anyone. I also think I have commitment issues coz the thought of being in a serious relationship is scary :/

[Jessica.]

I don't think anyone needs to define themselves tbh, I think you should just go with the flow and be yourself and don't stick with thinking you will be alone forever, if you think like that then it's more likely to happen, just be open and do whatever you are comfortable with, also, you shouldn't think all guys are the same from your bad experience. Good luck! :D

[InOne]

Who is the girl in your avatar Munchkins?

[smeagol]

you wont always feel that way one day your meet someone and everything else wont matter. and one day you may wish you still did feel like you do now lol
you seem a nice person . be happy first the rest will follow naturally .

[Novo]

Mock is probably planning a mass murder spree as we speak whilst Stu is trying to reassure him that he is perfectly Normal

[Legend killer]

Age 16

http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b460/gifpro95/684utw.gif






Feels old man

[michael21]

I'm copying my posts from the sexuality thread and adding some more, but i really feel like making a thread about how i feel, to see if anyone else feels the same, it's just so odd
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
I absolutely love men ok, that's clear, i am so attracted to them :hugesmile:
However though as much as i like men, i dont ever think i want to date and its really difficult. The thought of me succombing and allowing myself to completely be someones other half, makes me just feel ill, i just never want to give myself to someone.. and it's not just about being scared of getting hurt, which i am! i just could never desire to wanting to be someones forever.. and having that full time commitment which is just awful, i like my independence, and i just don't think id ever fit a relationship.

Also my OCD is so bad, and i think i'd always judge someone? id never feel they were good enough, i'd always pick faults in either them, to get myself out of the situation, or would think i'm not good enough, no matter how much they liked me.. and im just too clingy id either be standoffish in an effort not to be.. or would just be an irritant.
basically im not cut out to date someone, and thats just how it is
And it all just hit me last night, i was just laying in bed and i just thought omfg i never ever want to date someone? even if someone was perfect in every shape or form, id never want to be with them romantically or anything, yeah i may find them sexually attractive, but thats all, i still wouldn't do anything with them, it just repulses me :(

People may say you're only 16 you can't know for sure, but i do and its quite a depressing thought that i will live alone and eventhough i'm fine with it, it is going to be odd and i don't know how people will react. I can't define myself as Asexual i dont think, because i do find people sexually attractive just i'd never want to be with someone, like i could kiss someone, but i would never want it to go further than that ever, and so i dont even want to kiss people as its leading them on? as i will never go further. People know they're gay at 16, so how can i know i dont want to be with someone
No-one else i know feels the same and this thread is so incoherent but still:(

If you read this essay i applaud you LOL

1.start applauding me now
2.i no every one different but a girl at school use to think like you and quess what she marry with two kids and really happy
3.try not to worry to much about it and have fun you should start worrying at 30 :idc:

good post jen :hug:

[Ammi]

Age 16

http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b460/gifpro95/684utw.gif






Feels old man


..that gif is creepy LK...

[Mystic Mock]

Mock is probably planning a mass murder spree as we speak whilst Stu is trying to reassure him that he is perfectly Normal

How did you know?:suspect::joker:

[the truth]

I'm copying my posts from the sexuality thread and adding some more, but i really feel like making a thread about how i feel, to see if anyone else feels the same, it's just so odd
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
I absolutely love men ok, that's clear, i am so attracted to them :hugesmile:
However though as much as i like men, i dont ever think i want to date and its really difficult. The thought of me succombing and allowing myself to completely be someones other half, makes me just feel ill, i just never want to give myself to someone.. and it's not just about being scared of getting hurt, which i am! i just could never desire to wanting to be someones forever.. and having that full time commitment which is just awful, i like my independence, and i just don't think id ever fit a relationship.

Also my OCD is so bad, and i think i'd always judge someone? id never feel they were good enough, i'd always pick faults in either them, to get myself out of the situation, or would think i'm not good enough, no matter how much they liked me.. and im just too clingy id either be standoffish in an effort not to be.. or would just be an irritant.
basically im not cut out to date someone, and thats just how it is
And it all just hit me last night, i was just laying in bed and i just thought omfg i never ever want to date someone? even if someone was perfect in every shape or form, id never want to be with them romantically or anything, yeah i may find them sexually attractive, but thats all, i still wouldn't do anything with them, it just repulses me :(

People may say you're only 16 you can't know for sure, but i do and its quite a depressing thought that i will live alone and eventhough i'm fine with it, it is going to be odd and i don't know how people will react. I can't define myself as Asexual i dont think, because i do find people sexually attractive just i'd never want to be with someone, like i could kiss someone, but i would never want it to go further than that ever, and so i dont even want to kiss people as its leading them on? as i will never go further. People know they're gay at 16, so how can i know i dont want to be with someone
No-one else i know feels the same and this thread is so incoherent but still:(

If you read this essay i applaud you LOL


Hi Munchkins

I read every word of it and I applaud you for the most honest and sinecer post Ive ever read on this website. I dont think many people on this website are particularly honest and sincere (they hide behind predictable snide humour) tbh but you are genuine and I like you (as a friend).

I like the fact you have your own mind and opinions. Its good to question things its healthy. I also think the reason youre questioning things is simple, youre intelligent. youre learning and growing and open minded.

I also find its important not to get ahead of yourself in anything you do, just one step at a time. whether its a job or a relationship, or even simple basic things like buying goods etc if you learn piano you learn one scale at a time, if you run on roads get the right trainers first etc Its always best to look at your options etc its common sense stuff but 99% of people do not follow common sense principes. I think its very smart to come on here and have a conversation about these issues. at least we can share ideas and life stories. perhaps we can all learn from each others mistakes too. but Id suggest against meeting people off here or the internet.

fail to prepare and you prepare to fail. or as peter gabriel wrote, simply, "you can build yourself a steam train, if youd just lay down your tracks.....less than 1% of people lay down their tracks, then they wonder why their train keeps crashing.:joker:

as for relationships. I dont like sharing my home with most people. but if you meet someone you trust totally. only then you may let them in. firstly as friends and maybe something more. Theres no pressure to do anything at all....no one has to have a relationship, no one has to date, you can do anything, be anything, just be careful who you trust and dont be kind to the wrong people...if you put a beggar on your horseback he can drive you to the devil

I personally feel deeper emotion when I see people with integrity and especially when you see 2 people with integrity who love each other, it doesnt matter it ifs a man and woman, father and son, man and dog, it doesnt matter, when 2 people trust each other totally that my friend is a soul mate, sex has nothing to do with it really

take a look at hitchcock the movie to see a special relationship, whether its paul newman and joanne woodward, movie director john ford and john wayne, laurel and hardy , morecombe and wise, scorsese and deniro, elton john and david furnish, alex ferguson and ryan giggs (giggs is more loyal to fergie than hiw own lovers)or an old man with his guard dog...this is true love. My favourite sporting relationship is between joe and enzo calzaghe. those guys lived the dream together , they would die for each other too. take the movies, why does everyone love rocky for 30 years? boxing? Nope. Its the love between stallone and his wife and stallone and his manager, thats the real power of these movies.
l
one thing Ive noticed too, is when you back your own talent and go with it 100% its amazing how many likeminded people you will meet along the way who will somehow become either friends or associates and you will help each other out....its like an invisible safety net you didnt know was there...ultimately you have to answer to yourself and to what makes your soul rest easy....in the mean time you wont go far wrong with roy orbison and stevie wonder!

:wavey:

[Munchkins]

Mhm.. Reading back through this thread and my feelings are more ****ed up than ever..
I'm starting to categorise myself as Asexual, or something inbetween. Basically i never want sex, and i'm not sexually attracted to anyone, the thought of sex is repulsive, and i cant imagine anything worse :/
I can be attracted to guys like say they're hot and stuff, but its never sexually? it's just oh they have a nice face/body etc, anymore than that doesn't go through my mindset

why:bawling:

[Munchkins]

No-one really understands either.. it's like everyone just says you're too young etc and doesn't listen to me, so i'm just keeping it bottled up and not bothering to tell anyone tbh

[Legend killer]

Don't know why any girl would want sex anyway TBH. Us guys wham , bang and 15 seconds later all is good but you ladies I feel for you

Maybe a sex change could be your best approach

[Munchkins]

Don't know why any girl would want sex anyway TBH. Us guys wham , bang and 15 seconds later all is good but you ladies I feel for you

Maybe a sex change could be your best approach


Ew god no

[LemonJam]

I believe there is actually another member on here just like you Jenna. :)

[Sam:)]

Maybe your just not a horny person? I'm sure after a while you'll figure out what you want

[Munchkins]

I believe there is actually another member on here just like you Jenna. :)

One of my greatest friends :lovedup: