Health visitors

[Vicky.]

Why are they such *****?

Been to get Skye weighed today (14lbs 1oz now :D ) and was asked if shes on solids yet. I said we have tried her with rusks and baby rice, and the occasional bit of icecream or chocolate..and I swear you would think I had been poisoning her or something. Apparently it is very detrimental to childrens health to begin any kind of solid food before 6 months old (shes like..2 weeks away from 6 months :rolleyes: ) and she should not have anything like chocolate or icecream until she is at least 3 years old..or it could make her allergic to milk later in life

She then asked if she was sitting up on her own yet, and when I said no she made me feel terrible..said I should be spending the majority of her waking hours trying to teach her to sit. Sorry..I prefer playing with her and talking to her than just plonking her upright over and over again. Sitting properly isnt really that high on my list of priorities tbh, when shes ready she will do it.

Then she started having a go at me for having Skye in her own room. Apparently being in your room helps them control their breathing and stuff and being on their own can cause cot death :bored: Shes on her own room as she was getting woken up all night with Gavins coughing...she now sleeps a solid 12 hours every night...

It feels like they ask you stuff JUST to tell you off for it. It really pisses me off because 9 times out of 10, these nosy twats dont have kids of their own and just learn everything from a book. About time they realised that babies develop at their own rates and whats good for one might not be good for another, rather than classing them all as textbook :rolleyes:

Rant over.

[arista]

Have they Changed?

[Niamh.]

:laugh2:

I remember the health nurse for when Luke was a baby was an old bitch, everytime she sent out an appointment as well she'd get his surname wrong and everytime I went to see her I'd tell her but the next time it'd be wrong again, I wouldn't mind it was never the same wrong name, it was a different one eachtime....a more paranoid person might think she was doing it on purpose :suspect:

[Livia]

I don't know much about babies... but I reckon there are enough poor, neglected children in this country that the health visitors seem to miss. It surprises me why they would waste time trying to teach an obviously loving mother how to care for her own baby.

[Tom4784]

What a bitch, you should have uppercut (upercutted? IDFK) her.

[Lee.]

It's all a lot of crap. Your baby tells you what she wants/needs, not se bloody textbook.

My daughter was a hungry baby and by the time she was 4 months, milk wasn't satisfying her any more and she started waking during the night hungry. I started giving her a tiny bowlful of baby rice with her last bottle and she absolutely loved it. She came on leaps and bounds and has always been perfectly healthy.

[Niamh.]

It's all a lot of crap. Your baby tells you what she wants/needs, not se bloody textbook.

My daughter was a hungry baby and by the time she was 4 months, milk wasn't satisfying her any more and she started waking during the night hungry. I started giving her a tiny bowlful of baby rice with her last bottle and she absolutely loved it. She came on leaps and bounds and has always been perfectly healthy.

You definitely have to go with your instincts I think, plus no one knows your own baby better than yourself

[Cherie]

I totally agree. When my kids were small you could start giving them solids at 4 months, I think 6 months is along time to wait,. My niece has a 3 month old and she mentioned something about fruit before veg when weaning, or it might have been the other way round.:joker:.what!!! never did any of that, they had what ever was in the fruitbowl or veg basket and nine times out of 10 they spat out what they didn't like. It's all very well bringing them up by the book but it is not very practical, and I agree alot of the time it's people with no kids of their own who have this idealistic view on having a baby.

[Vicky.]

Have they Changed?

No..I wish. Its the same one I have had since she was a week old. The very same one who said she wasnt putting on weight fast enough and I should force feed her. The same one who told me not to bother trying to breastfeed as formula milk is exactly the same(Total lie). The same one who told me that if I didnt WAKE HER UP in the middle of the night for a bottle, she would end up back in hospital with jaundice..as all babies have to eat every 3 hours...

She talks utter **** and I wouldnt even bother going along if I didnt want to check her weight and stuff. Then again if I stopped going along they would probably start coming out to visit me :bored:

[Livia]

Didn't Vicky go into labour during the last Most Loved? What is she planning for an encore this time, I wonder?

[Vicky.]

Didn't Vicky go into labour during the last Most Loved? What is she planning for an encore this time, I wonder?

:laugh2: I did. I had forgot about that.

[Livia]

:laugh2: I did. I had forgot about that.

You're going to have to think of something BIG to top that...

[arista]

What a bitch, you should have uppercut (upercutted? IDFK) her.



Dezzy do not give Vicky Ideas
she is Fit

[arista]

No..I wish. Its the same one I have had since she was a week old. The very same one who said she wasnt putting on weight fast enough and I should force feed her. The same one who told me not to bother trying to breastfeed as formula milk is exactly the same(Total lie). The same one who told me that if I didnt WAKE HER UP in the middle of the night for a bottle, she would end up back in hospital with jaundice..as all babies have to eat every 3 hours...

She talks utter **** and I wouldnt even bother going along if I didnt want to check her weight and stuff. Then again if I stopped going along they would probably start coming out to visit me :bored:

Yes I see the Problem.

[Lee.]

No..I wish. Its the same one I have had since she was a week old. The very same one who said she wasnt putting on weight fast enough and I should force feed her. The same one who told me not to bother trying to breastfeed as formula milk is exactly the same(Total lie). The same one who told me that if I didnt WAKE HER UP in the middle of the night for a bottle, she would end up back in hospital with jaundice..as all babies have to eat every 3 hours...

She talks utter **** and I wouldnt even bother going along if I didnt want to check her weight and stuff. Then again if I stopped going along they would probably start coming out to visit me :bored:
I actually just stopped going eventually. I could tell my baby was healthy and happy, so I didn't need to go and get made feel ****e on a regular basis.

They did come to the house to do Lara's 2 year development check.. The hv showed her a book to see if she could say any of the words and she went through the whole book and said every word. The hv said her speech was very advanced for 2 yrs old . Lara disappeared and came back with her dummy in her mouth (which I'd hidden as they were a big nono at the time) The hv's face fell and she questioned me about it, made me feel crap, then said "no child should use a dummy at 2 years old as it stops their speech developing properly"

Wtf.. She had just said her speech was advanced

[Vicky.]

I actually just stopped going eventually. I could tell my baby was healthy and happy, so I didn't need to go and get made feel ****e on a regular basis.

They did come to the house to do Lara's 2 year development check.. The hv showed her a book to see if she could say any of the words and she went through the whole book and said every word. The hv said her speech was very advanced for 2 yrs old . Lara disappeared and came back with her dummy in her mouth (which I'd hidden as they were a big nono at the time) The hv's face fell and she questioned me about it, made me feel crap, then said "no child should use a dummy at 2 years old as it stops their speech developing properly"

Wtf.. She had just said her speech was advanced

Ahhh the dummy thing. Yes I have got wrong for that too. Even though we started using a dummy on the recommendation of our pediatrician who said often it helps with colic. Which it did.

[AnnieK]

My HV was lovely but I was warned by friends on things to not tell them. My son was a hungry baby - he was on the stage 2 milk at 4 weeks and was more or less fully weaned by 4 months....he has never had any problems and all his developmental milestones are well in advance. My friends all warned me to tell the HV what they want to hear - ie he no he only has milk, he's not in his own room (which BTW Vicky - my son was in his own room at 4 weeks due to him and I being disturbed all the time and he slept so much better than being disturbed). The doctor told me they have very black and white rules when I queried something my HV had said that I wasn't sure about.

Don't feel like **** - if Skye is happy and healthy - that's the only thing to go off IMO.

[Patrick]

omg.

Vicky oh my lord - one of my bestfriends had a baby girl, called Skye. I was up in her house about an hour before this thread was made, and she was talking about the Health Visitor coming out.

idk ah.

[Lee.]

Ahhh the dummy thing. Yes I have got wrong for that too. Even though we started using a dummy on the recommendation of our pediatrician who said often it helps with colic. Which it did.

Avh, they change the "rules" constantly.. There's 2 years 8 months between my two and the difference in what I was told was right was unbelievable. Just go with the flow, listen to Skye and ignore the old craws.

Thank god for dummies, that's all I have to say on that subject

[Suze]

I'd just nod and say yeah to everything she says, then just ignore her advice and do your own thing, Vicky. As others have said, Mums usually know best.

[Ammi]

Why are they such *****?

Been to get Skye weighed today (14lbs 1oz now :D ) and was asked if shes on solids yet. I said we have tried her with rusks and baby rice, and the occasional bit of icecream or chocolate..and I swear you would think I had been poisoning her or something. Apparently it is very detrimental to childrens health to begin any kind of solid food before 6 months old (shes like..2 weeks away from 6 months :rolleyes: ) and she should not have anything like chocolate or icecream until she is at least 3 years old..or it could make her allergic to milk later in life

She then asked if she was sitting up on her own yet, and when I said no she made me feel terrible..said I should be spending the majority of her waking hours trying to teach her to sit. Sorry..I prefer playing with her and talking to her than just plonking her upright over and over again. Sitting properly isnt really that high on my list of priorities tbh, when shes ready she will do it.

Then she started having a go at me for having Skye in her own room. Apparently being in your room helps them control their breathing and stuff and being on their own can cause cot death :bored: Shes on her own room as she was getting woken up all night with Gavins coughing...she now sleeps a solid 12 hours every night...

It feels like they ask you stuff JUST to tell you off for it. It really pisses me off because 9 times out of 10, these nosy twats dont have kids of their own and just learn everything from a book. About time they realised that babies develop at their own rates and whats good for one might not be good for another, rather than classing them all as textbook :rolleyes:

Rant over.

..the thing about health visitors and nurses Vicky is that they tend to worry parents..or make them feel that they're doing something wrong etc...I've seen endless mums upset because they've been told their child is underweight/overweight..and really they're not at all..I think people can see clearly when a child has a weight issue or something that has to be addressed..and it just causes so much stress, when being a new mum is stressful enough already...there is no 'ideal' in my opinion because you know your Skye better than anyone, so you know what is her 'ideal' in everything...you know when she's ill, you don't need a doctor to tell you that..you just need him to confirm a diagnosis...if you fed her ice-cream all the time and that's all she ate, then any extreme wouldn't be good..but you're not...and she'll sit up when she wants to sit up..there isn't a specific age when she has to do it...you know that she's happy and healthy and you're taking care of her...please don't worry about anything that health visitor says...you know Skye, she doesn't know her at all....

[Ammi]

..or what Suze said..but with a lot less words...

[Cherie]

:suspect: who decided to move weaning from 4 to 6 months anyway?

[Vicky.]

The weight thing I do not understand at all. They moaned at me because she was in the '9th percentile'..which apparently means 91% of babies her age are heavier than her. So how on earth does that make her underweight? Do they moan at everyone who isnt spot on in the middle?

My mum told me not to listen at all on the weaning thing. I was weaned at 3 months, as were my brother and sister. Apparently the guidelines were 3 months when I was a baby, then 4 months when my sister was, then 6 months for my brother. I dont think they actually have a clue to be honest :S

I was in my own bedroom at 10 DAYS old..and my brother and sister were in their own from birth.

I know I shouldnt listen to her and I should let it all go over my head, but it does get to you a bit when someone is standing telling you you are doing everything wrong and could be harming your child.

[Cherie]

Nobody ever tells anyone how hard it is to be a parent. I think everyone feels the same especially with a first baby, so much advice, and most of it should be ignored!

[Ammi]

The weight thing I do not understand at all. They moaned at me because she was in the '9th percentile'..which apparently means 91% of babies her age are heavier than her. So how on earth does that make her underweight? Do they moan at everyone who isnt spot on in the middle?

My mum told me not to listen at all on the weaning thing. I was weaned at 3 months, as were my brother and sister. Apparently the guidelines were 3 months when I was a baby, then 4 months when my sister was, then 6 months for my brother. I dont think they actually have a clue to be honest :S

I was in my own bedroom at 10 DAYS old..and my brother and sister were in their own from birth.

I know I shouldnt listen to her and I should let it all go over my head, but it does get to you a bit when someone is standing telling you you are doing everything wrong and could be harming your child.


..yeah, of course it gets to you Vicky, she's your first child and you're a good mother so you want to do everything that's best for her..but just because they say you're doing certain things wrong, doesn't mean you are..it's all on a written page for them, a tick list..?...but that doesn't apply to babies or any of us..everyone is different and as Skye's mum, you know her better thanj anyone, so please don't think you are doing anything wrong because you're not...I remember when my first son was born and I worried about so much and wanted to do everything just right for him..and the first summer he was crawling, he crawled outside into the garden...and my dad said to me, 'oh, you've done a good job of making sure he eats all the right balance of food, and look, he's in the garden, eating sh*t, the first chance he gets...and he was, because we'd had a cat come into the garden, who'd left something behind...

..I'm not sure what relevance that has at all lor even why I said it..but my dad was a very wise man....I think the moral of the story is, don't listen to health visitors..