For my breakfast

[Jesus.]

I will be serving Jewish Kryptonite on a bed of thick bread, and served with a cheeky little Ketchup jus.

http://i.imgur.com/JWnBql3.jpg

The first bite is always with the eyes, so the presentation is critical. I've used a very-recently-invented culinary dressing technique, called rustic symmetry. I've also used some of the crumbs from the bread as an additional texture on the plate.

http://i.imgur.com/tjLIZQk.jpg

As an accompanying beverage, you need something to counter balance the saltiness of the smoked bacon, and to accentuate the little kick of sweetness you get in the back of the pallet from the jus. Something like strong (not watery - there is a difference) tea with 2 sugars will elevate this dish another 10-15%

[AnnieK]

Ah...my breakfast date was cancelled this morning so I'm starving....send one my way please (minus the sugar in the tea....but strong is good)

[thesheriff443]

more brunch than breakfast, your bread looks like its on the turn, but good effort.

[Jesus.]

Moo and Ziz not behaving?

[Jesus.]

more brunch than breakfast, your bread looks like its on the turn, but good effort.

The bread is perfectly fresh. I don't eat it once it starts to firm up, unless it's for toast.

[AnnieK]

Ziz is sick....but no Moo is not behaving....he just lay in an aisle in Tesco like a starfish and refused to move....I wonder if he's still there...

[Lee.]

Ketchup on bacon is wrong! It has to be HP!

I've nothing for breakfast! :sad:

[Ammi]

..your kitchen units look quite nice...

[AnnieK]

Ketchup on bacon is wrong! It has to be HP!

I've nothing for breakfast! :sad:

I have this argument with everyone...I have ketchup but everyone calls me for that and says it should be HP

[Drew.]

4 bits of bacon on a sandwich is quite impressive

[thesheriff443]

Ketchup on bacon is wrong! It has to be HP!

I've nothing for breakfast! :sad:

you cant argue with him, you have no breakfast and he does.
ten points to jesus.

[Jesus.]

Bacon is smokey/salty, so it needs ketchup. Sausage and HP sauce are much nicer together.

[thesheriff443]

4 bits of bacon on a sandwich is quite impressive

i thinks its 8 slices of bacon and four slices of bread:shocked:

[Jesus.]

To keep a machine like me running, it needs fuel.

[Me. I Am Salman]

that's like 800 calories http://atrl.net/forums/images/smilies/images/smilies/noparty.gif

[thesheriff443]

To keep a machine like me running, it needs fuel.

have that on a daily basis and you wont be running any where!, more of slow waddle.

[Jesus.]

that's like 800 calories http://atrl.net/forums/images/smilies/images/smilies/noparty.gif

What's the daily allowance? 2500?

[Jesus.]

..your kitchen units look quite nice...

Thanks. Not sure how you see much of them, but I'll take it nonetheless.

[Me. I Am Salman]

idk it depends on your height/weight/level of activity
In order to lose like 2 pounds a week most people need to have 1300

[thesheriff443]

What's the daily allowance? 2500?

thats about what those sisters where spending:joker:

[Ammi]

Thanks. Not sure how you see much of them, but I'll take it nonetheless.

..I was just averting my eyes from the greasy bacon sandwich and looking down at the front of the units which was much more pleasing....

[Lee.]

I just cba going to the shop.. The kids have eaten all the bread, and my rolls are frozen.. So here's my breakfast...

http://i.imgur.com/wzFSLJc.jpg

[Jesus.]

******s sake lee. Resize that bitch.

[Jesus.]

And I'm talking about your vagina. Not that picture.

[Lee.]

******s sake lee. Resize that bitch.

It's so big!! I don't know what to do with it!!

said none of Jesus' girlfriends ever

[Jesus.]

It's so big!! I don't know what to do with it!!

said none of Jesus' girlfriends ever

What about the picture?

I've done it for you. Just change the links.


http://i.imgur.com/wzFSLJc.jpg


Edit: thought the spoiler was the picture again, and not about my pitifully small manhood. So I didn't look the first time.

[Lee.]

:joker:

What do you mean change the links??

[Jesus.]

:joker:

What do you mean change the links??

Right click on the resized prawn picture, and copy image location. Then go into your original post with that picture and edit it. Then paste the new link in where your one was, between the [IMG]'s

[Lee.]

Done :)

[Jesus.]

Done :)

The good thing about you eating prawns for breakfast, is if you need the toilet half way through, you won't need to wash your hands.

[Alf]

Ketchup on bacon is wrong! It has to be HP
I'll second that

[Shaun]

*likes your plates*

[Z]

All these anti-Jew breakfasts - bacon, prawns...

[Jessica.]

I'm having some nice healthy porridge (made with water). You should take a leaf out of my book.

[Z]

I'm having some nice healthy porridge (made with water). You should take a leaf out of my book.

Does it not taste a bit odd? I've never tried it with water before

[Jessica.]

Does it not taste a bit odd? I've never tried it with water before

No, you can always make it with either milk or water, it does taste different because the only flavour you get is the oats really, it's still the same texture, just tastes a bit less creamy and is a lot healthier.

[Me. I Am Salman]

How is it healthier though you need to have milk

[Jessica.]

How is it healthier though you need to have milk

Because milk is really fattening and there are other ways to get calcium than from dairy products.

[Me. I Am Salman]

having milk with porridge/oatmeal isn't going to kill you.

[Jessica.]

having milk with porridge/oatmeal isn't going to kill you.

I didn't say it was going to kill anyone, I often have it myself, I was just stating the fact that it's healthier. :joker:

[Josy]

4 sandwiches for breakfast? with 4 slice of bacon on each of them too you are one greedy bastart you do know this?

Agreed with Lee too you can't be having bacon with anything other than HP Brown Sauce.

Also white bread eurgh

[Me. I Am Salman]

fried stuff on white bread >>>> fried stuff on brown bread

[Josy]

fried stuff on white bread >>>> fried stuff on brown bread

Wholemeal bread>>>>>>>>>anything you just said

And fried bacon is a greasy horrible mess, grilled>>>>>>>>>>>

[Vanessa]

If i'm having a bacon sandwich i prefer white bread. For anything else i use brown one.

[Vicky.]

Cant stand brown bread. Always has little bits in :yuk:

Also this thread has made me really hungry for bacon but I cba going downstairs...my heart will thank me in the long run

[Vanessa]

Cant stand brown bread. Always has little bits in :yuk:

Also this thread has made me really hungry for bacon but I cba going downstairs...my heart will thank me in the long run

I like white bread, but i'm trying to be healthier. :joker:

[Jessica.]

How can you eat bacon that's not grilled? :yuk: I do prefer sausages or bacon in white bread though, because when I have wholemeal bread it slightly masks the smokiness, I usually use tortillas and wholemeal bread for everything else though.

http://puu.sh/3ORyo

[Jesus.]

After receiving criticism for greed, I decided to sort it out. Mainly to keep Josy from unleashing another torrent of abuse my way.

So my bacon sandwich recipe for those on a diet:

Firstly, instead of using 4 pieces of bread, use 3 cobs. Absolutely no difference in terms of calories (probably), but you can tell people you're cutting down, and technically it's true.

http://i.imgur.com/E0xeguT.jpg

The picture doesn't show it too well, but throw on some small, roasted vine tomatoes. Tomatoes are a fruit, so what you have here, is now somewhere between a fruit salad and a sandwich.

http://i.imgur.com/m8WRgfk.jpg

Presentation is still critical, and 3 cobs uses up less room on the plate than 2 sandwiches.

You're welcome.

http://i.imgur.com/RVC9i0t.jpg

[Z]

You have nice plates

[Lee.]

I take it "cobs" are what us normal people call rolls?

[Livia]

I will be serving Jewish Kryptonite on a bed of thick bread, and served with a cheeky little Ketchup jus.



Jews don't have hell. But if we did... you'd be going!

[Livia]

All these anti-Jew breakfasts - bacon, prawns...

It's racist, isn't it Zee. I might report him...

[Ammi]

You have nice plates

..oh yeah, I like the plates as well, let's steal them, Zee...