Kate Middleton is not a role model

[Z]

So Kate mania is upon us. Every woman I know is beside herself about the Duchess of Cambridge and her visit to Australia – what she wears, what her son wears, where she goes. These are some of the things I hear women say about Kate every day:

“She’s so normal.”

“She’s so classy.”

“She’s such a good mum.”

“I just want to be her friend.”

“She seems so nice.”

“She’s just like me.”

I have nothing against Kate. I am sure that she is nice, that she is a good wife, a good daughter, a good person, and of course, a great mother. But I do have a problem with her being held up as an ideal of exemplary womanhood, a wonderful role model for our daughters, an antidote to the Kim Kardashians of the world.

Because this outpouring of adoration is for a woman whose job description is basically:

“Be pretty.”

“Be thin.”

“Have some babies.”

“Don’t rock the boat.”

History is littered with cautionary tales of women who did not follow the above script. One word in particular springs to mind: Fergie.

I know, I know, the royals have learned so many lessons since the Diana-Fergie days. Kate and Wills, the story goes, are a love match. I’m sure they are, but it was a love match for which a woman had to to sacrifice her freedom, her youth, her independence and, many would argue, her personality. To marry the man of her dreams, she had to change who she was, give up her privacy, paid employment, ensure her 20s were entirely scandal-free and lose half her body weight. This is not something I would wish for my daughter.

By all accounts, it wasn’t something Kate was certain she wanted either. Despite the patronising ‘Waity Katie’ tag she earned from the British tabloids, royal experts have always said that Kate and William both wanted to be certain that this was a challenge Kate was ready for, and that by the time the carefully orchestrated engagement was announced, after eight years in the glare of the world, Kate had been fully prepped, trained and given many chances to back out. How very fairytale. This princess business is so romantic.

Kate is absolutely brilliant at being royal. She makes it look so easy. She is fantastic at making small talk with dignitaries from a zillion charities from a thousand countries around the world. She is excellent at smiling at the ‘real’ people, shaking hands and posing for selfies. She has perfected being just accessible enough for people to like her but never actually saying anything or giving anything away. She could have been born to it. But she wasn’t, she had to learn how to do all that and she was committed enough to that job to give it her all.

But that’s what it is: it’s a PR exercise and a professional veneer. She and her hubby were charged with salvaging the British royals from lurching from one PR disaster to another and they’ve pulled it off, because the royal fantasy is as tantalising as ever. Maybe more so.

And that’s why Duchess Kate is dangerous for our daughters. She has revived the idea that women being defined by who they marry is a positive life choice. Let’s remember that in her unimaginably privileged life – where she has to do nothing for herself if she doesn’t choose to – every designer dress, every luxury hair treatment, every palace and mansion and expensive baby buggy has been paid for by people with ‘normal’ jobs.

So I’m sorry people, she’s not just like you. And I don’t want my daughter to be like her.

http://www.mamamia.com.au/social/kate-middleton-not-a-role-model/

What do you think? I agree with the author of the article, I don't think she's a good role model for any little girl. She might be a kind person and she might be gracious and charitable but at the end of the day she was a normal girl with ambitions and hopes and an education and she chose to put all of those things into a little box and lock them away in favour of never having a hair out of place, a toe out of line and never giving much of an opinion on anything. Her role is to provide children and be a trophy bride. I wouldn't want any little girl to grow up wanting to be like Kate Middleton, Kate Middleton's life harks back to an era when women were not treated as equals and while I don't doubt that Prince William and his wife have a loving relationship, ultimately I think it's a very old fashioned type of relationship that's sort of sad to see. After the tearaway controversial brides that some of the older generations have had (Diana, Fergie...) it's obviously even more important to the royal family to have the most subservient, beige, people pleasing woman they can find to be admitted into the fold.

I don't have a problem with Kate Middleton. She seems lovely enough - but that's the problem - she manages to somehow be everywhere without ever really saying or doing anything of interest, and that's exactly how the royal family want and need her to be. I wonder if she's happy with her life?

[Brother Leon]

Michelle Obama>>Middleton

[Tom4784]

Bit of a poor article I thought, a lot of assumptions about her life, choices and relationships with very little to back it up.

The whole idea of Role Models and their supposed impact is ridiculous to me, Kate Middleton's popularity will not bring back the middle ages. Women won't suddenly wish to be nothing more than housewives because of one person, anyone who is that easily led is not worth worrying about.

[arista]

Kate works well around the World
Its helping
look here she is today in a Killing machine
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/04/19/article-2608185-1D31313100000578-880_964x564.jpg


Feel The Force

[Samm]

I love Kate :love:, she's the only one I like from the royal family

This must be one off them anti royal family websites

[Brother Leon]

Either way though it's abit silly to see her as a role model. She's just someone who married a royal. Big meh.

[Brother Leon]

I love Kate :love:, she's the only one I like from the royal family

This must be one off them anti royal family websites

Harry>>

[Z]

Bit of a poor article I thought, a lot of assumptions about her life, choices and relationships with very little to back it up.

The whole idea of Role Models and their supposed impact is ridiculous to me, Kate Middleton's popularity will not bring back the middle ages. Women won't suddenly wish to be nothing more than housewives because of one person, anyone who is that easily led is not worth worrying about.

Progress can only go at the rate of the slowest person, though. I think their relationship is a perfect example of how a relationship would and should have been according to the standards of a century ago - nowadays women could, should and do aspire to be more than just somebody's child bearing wife whose only purpose is to look beautiful and be appreciated solely for that reason. It's not so much an attack on Kate herself but of the media portrayal of her and of the Royal Family as an institution and the way it controls every person within it and dictates how they must behave and be perceived.

Edit: Say what you like about Sarah Ferguson but she's a three dimensional person who isn't afraid to speak her mind. I'd be surprised if Kate Middleton could find it within herself to give an opinion on anything that wasn't prepared by a team of fifteen people beforehand.

[MTVN]

Because this outpouring of adoration is for a woman whose job description is basically:

“Be pretty.”

“Be thin.”

“Have some babies.”

“Don’t rock the boat.”

Problem for me is that the article is pretty much arguing that these should be considered inherently undesirable traits for a woman. Hardly Kate's fault that she's pretty, if she's thin well then good for her, childbearing is generally pretty commendable, and so what if she isn't controversial? It shouldn't be assumed that her true personality and character is being suppressed just because she doesn't 'rock the boat'

Sure it's great if a woman wants to be outspoken, ambitious and a bit radical, but not all women are going to have the same aspirations or the same views on life, as this article seems to think they should. The writer mocks how easy and privileged a life it is being a royal but also concedes that creating a good public image can be very difficult, a lot of people wouldn't have the energy or the ability to do a lot of the tasks and fulfil a lot of the obligations that Kate does as a royal

[Tom4784]

Progress can only go at the rate of the slowest person, though. I think their relationship is a perfect example of how a relationship would and should have been according to the standards of a century ago - nowadays women could, should and do aspire to be more than just somebody's child bearing wife whose only purpose is to look beautiful and be appreciated solely for that reason. It's not so much an attack on Kate herself but of the media portrayal of her and of the Royal Family as an institution and the way it controls every person within it and dictates how they must behave and be perceived.

Edit: Say what you like about Sarah Ferguson but she's a three dimensional person who isn't afraid to speak her mind. I'd be surprised if Kate Middleton could find it within herself to give an opinion on anything that wasn't prepared by a team of fifteen people beforehand.

Nowadays women should make their own decisions, telling a woman they have to be outspoken and career minded isn't all that different to telling them they have to focus on being a pretty housewife and nothing more. It's two sides of the same coin. It's still attempting to dictate what women should or shouldn't be.

At the end of the day it's their choice, if a woman wants to focus on her career then that's her choice, if she wants to focus on her family that's fine too.

[AnnieK]

Problem for me is that the article is pretty much arguing that these should be considered inherently undesirable traits for a woman. Hardly Kate's fault that she's pretty, if she's thin well then good for her, childbearing is generally pretty commendable, and so what if she isn't controversial? It shouldn't be assumed that her true personality and character is being suppressed just because she doesn't 'rock the boat'

Sure it's great if a woman wants to be outspoken, ambitious and a bit radical, but not all women are going to have the same aspirations or the same views on life, as this article seems to think they should. The writer mocks how easy and privileged a life it is being a royal but also concedes that creating a good public image can be very difficult, a lot of people wouldn't have the energy or the ability to do a lot of the tasks and fulfil a lot of the obligations that Kate does as a royal

Well said....

[Z]

Nowadays women should make their own decisions, telling a woman they have to be outspoken and career minded isn't all that different to telling them they have to focus on being a pretty housewife and nothing more. It's two sides of the same coin. It's still attempting to dictate what women should or shouldn't be.

At the end of the day it's their choice, if a woman wants to focus on her career then that's her choice, if she wants to focus on her family that's fine too.

I'm not telling anybody to do anything - my issue isn't even with Kate Middleton's life choice, it's the media portrayal of this as being something to aspire to and the consequential admiration of Kate as a person and by proxy of her lifestyle. That, I find damaging. They've elevated an unlikely romance into a real life fairytale and she's more than willing to play along with that which I think is dangerous when it's then plastered all over the papers in favour of more pressing issues in the world. To reiterate, I don't think she's in any way a bad person, just that what her marriage represents is unrealistic and potentially damaging to young girls and young women. It's not that she's pretty, it's that she's dolled up to unrealistic standards, dressed in the nicest clothes and always looks immaculate to a point that no other woman could do on a day to day basis. There is a team of people dedicated to making her out to be a Stepford Wife, essentially, and I find it a bit troubling.

[Livia]

I like Kate. She's the complete antithesis of Diana.

[AnnieK]

I'm not telling anybody to do anything - my issue isn't even with Kate Middleton's life choice, it's the media portrayal of this as being something to aspire to and the consequential admiration of Kate as a person and by proxy of her lifestyle. That, I find damaging. They've elevated an unlikely romance into a real life fairytale and she's more than willing to play along with that which I think is dangerous when it's then plastered all over the papers in favour of more pressing issues in the world. To reiterate, I don't think she's in any way a bad person, just that what her marriage represents is unrealistic and potentially damaging to young girls and young women. It's not that she's pretty, it's that she's dolled up to unrealistic standards, dressed in the nicest clothes and always looks immaculate to a point that no other woman could do on a day to day basis. There is a team of people dedicated to making her out to be a Stepford Wife, essentially, and I find it a bit troubling.

I can't agree with Greg. As a country with a monarchy Kate and William are perfect. Yes, she has an army of personal assistants etched but she is approachable and finally giving people something to talk about the monarchy positively. She is down to earth too and approachable. You are kind if condemning ther relationship in my opinion. She is no more really going to influence kids than a Disney fairy tale.

[AnnieK]

I like Kate. She's the complete antithesis of Diana.

Exactly....she is genuine

[Z]

I can't agree with Greg. As a country with a monarchy Kate and William are perfect. Yes, she has an army of personal assistants etched but she is approachable and finally giving people something to talk about the monarchy positively. She is down to earth too and approachable. You are kind if condemning ther relationship in my opinion. She is no more really going to influence kids than a Disney fairy tale.

She's not really got a personality though, she's a blank canvas that people are painting on - oh she's nice, she's approachable - she smiles and waves at people, she's just learned what not to do and has been very good at that. She's an educated woman from an upper middle class family, I highly doubt her life ambitions were to get married and be a ribbon cutter for the rest of her life - I mean I'm sure it's an enjoyable lifestyle and they seem like a lovely couple; but I just take issue with the idea of a trophy wife in the twenty first century. William still has a job, no matter how ceremonial it might be, it really just makes me think of decades gone by where women were housewives and that was all they could ever be. Disney fairy tales are really influential, though. Most little girls I've ever known want to grow up and be a princess - and Kate Middleton did just that. But the reality is she's not her own person, she doesn't do what she wants, she's an extension of the Royal family and I just think it's a bizarre culture and it's weird that she's elevated to the role of a role model for eradicating every trace of anything that doesn't conform to Royal family standards.

[AnnieK]

Yes most little girls want to grow up to be a princess....then they do exactly that, grow up. Kate is just one person. I actually think the Queen is that keen on repairing the royal image that if Kate wants to work she will be able to in some way shape or form. Let's face it, George is less than a year old many women with children if that age would still be on maternity leave. You are making a lot of assumptions on her personality which it's impossible to know.

[Crimson Dynamo]

i would and she and wills are lovely

[Livia]

Yes most little girls want to grow up to be a princess.....

I wanted to be a princess and low and behold, I grew up into the Queen of *******ing Everything.

[AnnieK]

I wanted to be a princess and low and behold, I grew up into the Queen of *******ing Everything.

And I bet you never doubted that for even a minute did you LOL

For the record, I didn't want to be a princess....I thought they lived in castles with no windows and had no tv. I've no idea why but the thought horrified me. I think my parents must've subliminally convinced me I wasn't princess material.

[user104658]

She's there to look pretty and keep her mouth shut. I would be very, very concerned if it was one of my daughters.

Having an opinion - especially a political one - if off the table for her. Many of the decisions regarding her child/ren/s lives will also be out of bounds (they've probably been made already). She isnt stupid, so she'll inevitable grow bored of being a well dressed mute manequin, and we'll have Diana Mk.II. Althooough... Given how that ended... maybe we won't, if Kate indeed "isn't stupid".

[user104658]

In all seriousness: can anyone find me a Kate Middleton quote showing an opinion, any opinion, on anything, that isn't fence-sitting PR rhetoric? I'd be flabbergasted.

Pre-William doesn't count, btw.

[Marsh.]

Of course she has opinions. Broadcasting them publicly I doubt is something she'd bothered about doing anyway.

[MTVN]

Everyone moans when Prince Charles or Princess Anne get involved in politics and express opinions, now they moan when Kate doesn't?

[thesheriff443]

I wanted to be a princess and low and behold, I grew up into the Queen of *******ing Everything.

bigger queens than you!, on here:joker:

[thesheriff443]

if she is happy, then that's all that matters.

[Marsh.]

Everyone moans when Prince Charles or Princess Anne get involved in politics and express opinions, now they moan when Kate doesn't?

Exactly. Damned if they do, damned if they don't.

Not broadcasting every brain fart to the world doesn't mean she doesn't have thoughts and opinions.

Are people genuinely interested to hear what they are?

[InOne]

I watched The Graduate recently and it reminded it me of this thread. Mrs Robinson is extremely bitter because she was an intelligent woman and basically got pregnant and had to give up her hopes and dreams to get married. So she ended up a bored, resentful alcoholic who doesn't sleep with her husband and seduces young men.

Kate would make a good Mrs Robinson :amazed:

[Crimson Dynamo]

I watched The Graduate recently and it reminded it me of this thread. Mrs Robinson is extremely bitter because she was an intelligent woman and basically got pregnant and had to give up her hopes and dreams to get married. So she ended up a bored, resentful alcoholic who doesn't sleep with her husband and seduces young men.

Kate would make a good Mrs Robinson :amazed:

I have been actively targeting that type of women for a long time

but using charm and humour and not electrical wire and duct tape

[lily.]

She's not really got a personality though, she's a blank canvas that people are painting on - oh she's nice, she's approachable - she smiles and waves at people, she's just learned what not to do and has been very good at that. She's an educated woman from an upper middle class family, I highly doubt her life ambitions were to get married and be a ribbon cutter for the rest of her life - I mean I'm sure it's an enjoyable lifestyle and they seem like a lovely couple; but I just take issue with the idea of a trophy wife in the twenty first century. William still has a job, no matter how ceremonial it might be, it really just makes me think of decades gone by where women were housewives and that was all they could ever be. Disney fairy tales are really influential, though. Most little girls I've ever known want to grow up and be a princess - and Kate Middleton did just that. But the reality is she's not her own person, she doesn't do what she wants, she's an extension of the Royal family and I just think it's a bizarre culture and it's weird that she's elevated to the role of a role model for eradicating every trace of anything that doesn't conform to Royal family standards.

This. 100%

[Kizzy]

I feel sorry for anyone that gets mixed up with that lot.. It never ends well.

[arista]

if she is happy, then that's all that matters.


Yes

[Livia]

Kate is different from Diana in many ways. Diana was twenty when she married Charles who was a couple of decades older. Diana had hardly any qualifications, Kate graduated from St Andrews. Her parents aren't aristocracy, so she's had a relatively normal upbringing.

Frankly, of all the skanks, photogenic sluts, famous shaggers, general wastes of space, footballers, talentless kids of famous parents, reality TV "stars" and tit-birds who are held up as role models, I don't see the trouble with a beautiful, educated young woman who married a prince. But hey... not all role models can be Katie Price, right?

[lily.]

To be honest, the best role model children have is their parents. Once we stop becoming children, we realise that in the real world, the only thing that counts is the values and standards we have for ourselves. These values are mostly taught to us by our parents.

The biggest problem with people who think Katie Price and co. are something to aspire to is that they have been dragged up instead of brought up.. so they don't really have any good standards to begin with.

And, yes, this is a massive generalisation, but I stand by it.

[Crimson Dynamo]

huge swathes of England look at her as the perfect princess to aspire to.

[anne666]

She's as good as any and infinitely better than the current plague of trashy media *****s.

[Z]

Kate is different from Diana in many ways. Diana was twenty when she married Charles who was a couple of decades older. Diana had hardly any qualifications, Kate graduated from St Andrews. Her parents aren't aristocracy, so she's had a relatively normal upbringing.

Frankly, of all the skanks, photogenic sluts, famous shaggers, general wastes of space, footballers, talentless kids of famous parents, reality TV "stars" and tit-birds who are held up as role models, I don't see the trouble with a beautiful, educated young woman who married a prince. But hey... not all role models can be Katie Price, right?

You're not wrong. But I don't think she should be regarded as a role model. What sort of message does that send out to little kids? Be beautiful, get a degree from a top university and then be somebody's wife and never have a life of your own even though we've provided you with everything you needed to be your own person and you were on course to do just that. Say what you like about Katie Price but she made her own way in life, she scrapped and posed and fought for every last penny she's earned from being a somebody despite not having any discernible talents. Sure, I'd rather my daughter grew up to be more like Kate Middleton than Katie Price but I certainly wouldn't want her to grow up thinking she should be like Kate Middleton - some man's trophy bride who doesn't have an opinion on anything, her only function is to have children and be seen constantly smiling and being a caricature of a human being.

[Livia]

You're not wrong. But I don't think she should be regarded as a role model. What sort of message does that send out to little kids? Be beautiful, get a degree from a top university and then be somebody's wife and never have a life of your own even though we've provided you with everything you needed to be your own person and you were on course to do just that. Say what you like about Katie Price but she made her own way in life, she scrapped and posed and fought for every last penny she's earned from being a somebody despite not having any discernible talents. Sure, I'd rather my daughter grew up to be more like Kate Middleton than Katie Price but I certainly wouldn't want her to grow up thinking she should be like Kate Middleton - some man's trophy bride who doesn't have an opinion on anything, her only function is to have children and be seen constantly smiling and being a caricature of a human being.

There are women who want to be a wife and mother, the fact they've had a good education and got a decent degree doesn't mean that being a wife and mother is a step down. What's more, Kate is patron for a whole host of charities so she does have many functions. And furthermore, I'm not at all sure Kate IS a trophy wife; it's not like William couldn't have had his pick of women and/or married another royal. But he didn't, he married the woman he loved. I'd say he's more her trophy husband.

Katie Price may have made her own way in the world but does that make her a role model? I'm not sure it does.

[Z]

There are women who want to be a wife and mother, the fact they've had a good education and got a decent degree doesn't mean that being a wife and mother is a step down. What's more, Kate is patron for a whole host of charities so she does have many functions. And furthermore, I'm not at all sure Kate IS a trophy wife; it's not like William couldn't have had his pick of women and/or married another royal. But he didn't, he married the woman he loved. I'd say he's more her trophy husband.

Katie Price may have made her own way in the world but does that make her a role model? I'm not sure it does.

It's not a step down, it's not a step anywhere - I would ask the question, what was the point in getting an education if you're not going to do anything with it. I don't really consider being a ceremonial figurehead for a variety of charities purely because you're the Prince's wife as being a legitimate job though. I don't really know much about her, I don't know if she actively does charity work or if she just cuts ribbons and appears places but I would hazard a guess at the latter, not the former. As I've said already in the thread, I think their relationship is genuine, it's just I agree with the author of the article who says that what their relationship represents is not something to be admired because it harks back to an era where women were not equal to men. I never said Katie Price was a role model, I don't think she is one, but I'd rather my daughter had the initiative to go out and make her own way in the world and learn to stand on her own two feet than have her be well behaved and gracious but go on to just be a child bearer and be applauded for looking pretty and wearing nice clothes. That's just my view. I don't dislike the woman or have any issue with the Royal Family.

[Livia]

It's not a step down, it's not a step anywhere - I would ask the question, what was the point in getting an education if you're not going to do anything with it. I don't really consider being a ceremonial figurehead for a variety of charities purely because you're the Prince's wife as being a legitimate job though. I don't really know much about her, I don't know if she actively does charity work or if she just cuts ribbons and appears places but I would hazard a guess at the latter, not the former. As I've said already in the thread, I think their relationship is genuine, it's just I agree with the author of the article who says that what their relationship represents is not something to be admired because it harks back to an era where women were not equal to men. I never said Katie Price was a role model, I don't think she is one, but I'd rather my daughter had the initiative to go out and make her own way in the world and learn to stand on her own two feet than have her be well behaved and gracious but go on to just be a child bearer and be applauded for looking pretty and wearing nice clothes. That's just my view. I don't dislike the woman or have any issue with the Royal Family.

There's only one way we can settle this, Zee. We must wrestle...

[Z]

There's only one way we can settle this, Zee. We must wrestle...

I'll get my bikini, you get the mud

[lily.]

I'll get the video camera.

[Marsh.]

I'll get the lube. :umm2:

[AnnieK]

I'll get the popcorn....

And the emergency services on standby for Greg.....

[Livia]

He won't show up. He's all talk....

[Z]

"Oi! Princess!" -runs away-