Insults

[Sophii3x]

Post your fave insults here! :tongue:

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Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege!

I heard that you went to the haunted house and they offered you a job.

You've got the perfect weapon against muggers - yer face.

You should learn from your parents mistakes - try using some birth control.

Listen, are you always this stupid or are you just making a special effort today?

Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?

[Dr43%er]

Not so much insults, but 2 great retorts by Winston Churchill.

Could a world leader get away with that now?



Lady Astor: Winston: If I were married to you, I'd put poison in your coffee.
Sir Winston Churchill: Nancy, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.


Wife of prominent politician to Winston Churchill (with disdain in her voice): Mr. Churchill, you are drunk!
Mr. Churchill: Yes, madam, and you are ugly. But in the morning, I will be sober, and you will still be ugly.

I think they are class.

[SiMoN!]

you fell of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way done

[Chrizzle]

Not so much an insult but its pretty mean:

*to someone with a mole on their face*
Excuse me,you have a face on that mole!

[andybigbro]

Originally posted by Chrizzle
Not so much an insult but its pretty mean:

*to someone with a mole on their face*
Excuse me,you have a face on that mole!

LMAO

[Mrluvaluva]

Very funny!

[Siouxsie]

I dont know any cos im a nice girl :joker::laugh3:

[Emilee]

LOL..... Mine isnt really an insult its a comeback.
If a girl comes up and asks you:

"Are you a lesbian? (which for some reason hsa happened to me a lot of times) Say:

"No - Why? do you fancy me?" :blush2:

[Chrizzle]

Some funny insults:

I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!

I think you should live for the moment. But after that, I doubt I'll think so.

Man alive! But I wish you weren't.

I believe in respect for the dead; in fact, I could only respect you if you WERE dead.

Is your name Maple Syrup? It should be, you sap.

You spent so much time trying to get rid of that halitosis that you had only to find out that you are not popular anyway.

You are the kind of person who, when one first meets you, one doesn't like you. But when one gets to know you better, one hates you.

We know that romance brings out the beast in you -- the jackass.

I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.

There are several people in this world that I find obnoxious and you are all of them.

All of your girlfriends kiss you with their eyes closed. Considering your face, that's the only way they could.

I hear that when your mother first saw you, she decided to leave you on the front steps of a police station while she turned herself in.

Would you like to replace my business partner who died this morning? I'll arrange it with the undertaker.

People say that you are outspoken, but not by anyone that I know of.

Your conversation is like the waves of the sea. It makes me sick!

We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.

When you get to the men`s room, you will see a sign that says, "Gentlemen." Pay no heed to it. Go right on in.

The only things you ever make are mistakes and cigarette ashes.

You always manage to keep your neck above water. We can tell by the color of it.

All that you are you owe to your parents. Why don't you send them a penny and square the account?

I heard you have hair on your chest, and that`s not your only resemblance to Rin Tin Tin.

No one should be punished for accident of birth, but you look too much like a wreck not to be.

There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it.

Sit down and give your mind a rest.

[andybigbro]

Originally posted by Chrizzle
Some funny insults:

I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!

I think you should live for the moment. But after that, I doubt I'll think so.

Man alive! But I wish you weren't.

I believe in respect for the dead; in fact, I could only respect you if you WERE dead.

Is your name Maple Syrup? It should be, you sap.

You spent so much time trying to get rid of that halitosis that you had only to find out that you are not popular anyway.

You are the kind of person who, when one first meets you, one doesn't like you. But when one gets to know you better, one hates you.

We know that romance brings out the beast in you -- the jackass.

I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.

There are several people in this world that I find obnoxious and you are all of them.

All of your girlfriends kiss you with their eyes closed. Considering your face, that's the only way they could.

I hear that when your mother first saw you, she decided to leave you on the front steps of a police station while she turned herself in.

Would you like to replace my business partner who died this morning? I'll arrange it with the undertaker.

People say that you are outspoken, but not by anyone that I know of.

Your conversation is like the waves of the sea. It makes me sick!

We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.

When you get to the men`s room, you will see a sign that says, "Gentlemen." Pay no heed to it. Go right on in.

The only things you ever make are mistakes and cigarette ashes.

You always manage to keep your neck above water. We can tell by the color of it.

All that you are you owe to your parents. Why don't you send them a penny and square the account?

I heard you have hair on your chest, and that`s not your only resemblance to Rin Tin Tin.

No one should be punished for accident of birth, but you look too much like a wreck not to be.

There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it.

Sit down and give your mind a rest.


i am liking these one lOL

[Sophii3x]

I keep on telling people to 'Go sex yourself' instead of 'Go **** yourself':joker:

(Great insults Chris)

[andybigbro]

LOL I SAY sHAG OF

[Chrizzle]

The other day this fat little brat who got suspended for chasing me and my friends with a compass was puling faces at me at the end of the day. and she pushed Lindzi lmao. Shes younger than me so I went
"Oi listen, Im in yr 11, your in like Yr 2 , so ******* off." Then walked off. That shut her up.

Shes actually in yr 10 but nvm:joker:

[Sophii3x]

Go sex yourself Andy:bigsmile:

[andybigbro]

$hag off Soph :hugesmile:

[Sophii3x]

Originally posted by Chrizzle
The other day this fat little brat who got suspended for chasing me and my friends with a compass was puling faces at me at the end of the day. and she pushed Lindzi lmao. Shes younger than me so I went
"Oi listen, Im in yr 11, your in like Yr 2 , so ******* off." Then walked off. That shut her up.

Shes actually in yr 10 but nvm:joker:

PMSL!! I always do that to youynger students, it's hilarious! (but onl;y if they do something to me or a friend)

Tell little kids to sex themselves, they get totally confused!

[andybigbro]

Originally posted by Sophii3x
Originally posted by Chrizzle
The other day this fat little brat who got suspended for chasing me and my friends with a compass was puling faces at me at the end of the day. and she pushed Lindzi lmao. Shes younger than me so I went
"Oi listen, Im in yr 11, your in like Yr 2 , so ******* off." Then walked off. That shut her up.

Shes actually in yr 10 but nvm:joker:

PMSL!! Tell litle kids to sex themselves, they get totally confused!
SOPHIE :shocked: You say that to lIttle Kids :nono: LOL

[Sophii3x]

Are you done sexing yourself yet, Andy?

[Emilee]

LMAO.... You guys are so funny. :laugh2: