Shaun ranks: every RuPaul's Drag Race queen (50th place)

[Shaun]

This is something I've been wanting to do for a while since I'm sure I've probably spat acid at everyone at some point in the main thread and until we get a subforum where we can have threads specifically devoted to Akashia, this is a compromise, but also because I've now rewatched each season probably 4 times or more.

The entire thread is, of course, subjective, so don't get too pressed if I put Alyssa Edwards way down in 79th (spoiler: I don't). I will try to take as much into consideration as I can, but I'll happily admit I've not seen a single one of these queens live and as such can't testify to their full potential. The show & untucked, their social media presence, and also interviews on shows like Hey Qween and What's The T, are pretty much my resources here.

Without further ado... the queen I am putting rock bottom is...

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/7/7e/8F2B06BC-745D-4E99-A2DA-09B292918AFB.gif/revision/latest?cb=20180506072610
126th Place: Vivienne Pinay (Season 5) - finished joint-10th

Finishing rock bottom is never a good look and there really aren't that many queens I feel strong negativity about, so the first few writeups here are going to be my most hateful and then I'm going to gush from, like, 110th upwards :laugh:

Vivienne entered, and indeed exited, season 5 proclaiming herself the fishiest queen that had yet been cast, which is quite cute when you consider she was in a cast with Monica Beverly Hillz, Jade Jolie and Penny Tration Alyssa Edwards. Let alone in the season directly after Kenya Michaels, Our Lord and Fishiness. This should go some distance into explaining the level of delusion with which we are dealing, here, people.

Her elimination of course is what she's most remembered for, on account of it being the first ever double-elimination, but I think that speaks for itself; how do you make "Oops! I Did it Again" boring? It might have been more poetic, though, if Honey had won it since she technically did anyway (even if it was a case of, like, Honey delivering a 3/10 and Vivienne a 1/10)

What makes her the WOAT for me though is her personality. She had this constant stink-face on, and each talking-head she showed was to slag off another competitor: she particularly hated Roxxxy Andrews for being "loud and obnoxious" when they were paired together for Roxxxy's breakout Tossha Salad performance, all the while delivering... well can you remember a Vivienne moment?

All of her runways were short-skirt affairs that might've been cute on Tatianna.

And finally there was controversy when she was found to be ripping off people with a wig company (https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/comments/5n5twa/vivienne_pinays_wig_meltdown/). If there's a better metaphor for a queen thinking she's the ****, and having her ass handed to her by a bunch of actual princesses, I have not seen it.

She might be affiliated with the Haus of Edwards now but honestly, unless there's been a seismic turnaround, I can't see myself ever liking her. Just... really toxic.

Memorable quote(s): "Of course it's a double elimination. Why wouldn't it be?" (fair point sis, at least you worked out your potential after you were eliminated)
Best Runway(s): I guess her "Pretty in Pink" was perfectly fine if you cut out her caked face
Best Moment(s): ...this segment will be used better later in the rankdown.

[RileyH]

Wow perched for this :clap1:

I forgot Miss Pinay even existed :skull: trash

[MB.]

I was expecting to see Delta behind that spoiler tag (if not just because her recent... efforts with Ru have tanked her stock even further), but I've absolutely no qualms with Vivienne being bottom! they're all bottoms

[MB.]

Also iirc the Haus of Edwards cut their ties with Vivienne after princesswiggate

[Tom4784]

I only have the vaguest recollection of her so I assume that means she was trash.

(I'm working on getting the subforum, give me time to plead the case)

[Braden]

I remember Vivienne refused to join the other queens for Miley's performance at the VMA's because she was upset she didn't get a close-up during the rehearsal. The best thing about Vivienne was Porkchop's rants on Periscope about her unwarranted diva attitude throughout the ordeal.

I'm so excited for this, Shaun. I'm ready for some of my faves (mainly Cracker and Milk) to be slain early on this ranking. I forgive you already, lmao.

[Shaun]

I don't think there's a MAJOR cull (like, anyone beyond episode 7) until.... oh 103rd. Turns out I am hateful after all.

[Braden]

Please be Derrick Berry.

[Braden]

Actually, please be Pearl.

[TomC]

What happened with Delta Work? I really liked her in Season 3.

[MB.]

Beside the obvious candidates who seem to exist only to populate the bottom tenth of these lists (the Phoenixes, the Venus D-Lites, the Alisa Summerses of this world), I'm rooting for Tempest, Carmen and Charlie to sashay out of this ranking as soon as possible

And then there are the likes of Pearl, Milk, Cracker (...any synonym for 'white', basically), Trixie, Dela, Pandora, Detox and Raven who I don't particularly care for at best, but deserve at least top 100 because despite my best attempts, I can't begrudge their talent. And Pearl.

[arista]

3mdhRvDeuDk


Way back in 2014
He/She got on a Canada Ad.

[Smithy]

Adoré screAMING at how she said it :joker::joker:

[MB.]

3mdhRvDeuDk


Way back in 2014
He/She got on a Canada Ad.

Thanks! I hate it

[Mokka]

Oooo... pearched for this Shaun!!!

[RileyH]

Actually, please be Pearl.

No

[Braden]

No

Yes.

[ethanjames]

hype!

[Shaun]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/17/48/81/1748819b8247e70223016ac915c84cba.gif
125th Place: Venus D-Lite (Season 3) - finished last

My first "first eliminated" mention goes to Venus D'Lite, hands down one of the most uncomfortable pathological liars to emerge from the circuit and a weird self-aggrandizing ego to boot. On the show, you may have missed her... in her first episode she was only shown in the Workroom really throwing shade at Phoenix for copying her idea of crushing up baubles and using the glass as decoration for their outfits. She was then told by the judges she had over-accessorised and presented an underwhelming mess.

The lipsync with Shangela - to Vanessa Williams' "The Right Stuff", in front of Vanessa Williams herself - is one of the show's messier and this is from a season that includes India/Mimi. Venus essentially stalks Shangela around the stage, grabbing parts of her costume and trying to choke her with them, and then throws her own ponytail towards the back of the stage at the other girls (prompting Mariah to quote, "if she'd-a hit me with that hair, I'd probably have to sock her.") RuPaul says he's uncomfortable at the end. By all means, it's an awkward hit! But for all the wrong reasons.

On the subject of Mariah actually:

z7O8sHA0DfU

:flutter:

Venus D'Lite has spent tens, or hundreds if you believe her, of thousands of dollar on cosmetic surgery to look like Madonna. The final result, you ask?

https://peopleysk2.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/person-images%2FVenus+D+Lite_5ac6680039b0b416003f4399.jpg ?versionid=piAQ0zpxzjzviU0ESJ1wtYX2x8BKQpmy

Hmm!

Recently she has appeared on 'My Strange Addiction' (with aforementioned Madonna surgery), taken shots at Milk for booking a collaboration gig with Madonna, implied that she, alone, was responsible for Shangela being cast again on Drag Race by saying it "was her biggest fear" :crazy: and... oh yeah, exploited a fan's suicidal thoughts to try and look like a hero (https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/comments/5yhuin/venus_dlite_exploiting_suicidal_people/). I don't know if I "hate" Venus D'Lite, because it's almost comical really, but I just get an overwhelming impression that she is, 100%, not a good person. And a pretty lacklustre queen to boot.

Memorable quote(s): "You can be my friend or you can be my enemy, just say it to my face." (this is... 12 minutes into a season. Really girl.)
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): Santino saying she looks like "a sad Christmas elf".

[TomC]

Mariah :love:

[Braden]

As far as first boots go, Venus isn't my least favourite. I'm glad she left first, though. In a season as fantastic as S3, I don't see what more Venus could've contributed to its quality. I want to say that she's generally harmless, but then I remember that horrific (yet hilarious, sorry) moment you mentioned with the suicidal fan.

I’d probably have a bit higher in my ranking, but only because I know there are a few more queens I genuinely dislike more than Venus. Also, part of me does appreciate the absurdity of having three or four different Madonna looks for a Hey Queen interview. I can imagine Jonny and Lady Red just sitting there awkwardly waiting and then pretending to care when she comes back.

[MB.]

I can't Ripley's Believe It or Not that Venus is out so early!

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

Roxxxy out next

[Braden]

Roxxxy out next

:joker:

[Mokka]

Roxxxy out next
:joker::joker:

[RileyH]

Roxxxy out next

:joker:

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

:joker:

:joker::joker:

:joker:

https://memegenerator.net/img/images/14524032/black-guy-at-the-podium.jpg

[MB.]

:joker:

:joker::joker:

:joker:

All these other hoes
But they're all the same

[Shaun]

you'll be waiting a while for Miss Andrews, trust and believe!

[Tom4784]

Venus was a horror.

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/5/59/Tumblr_inline_n1xt7l57891qcim7t.gif/revision/latest?cb=20140313023614
124th Place: Magnolia Crawford (Season 6) - finished joint-last

Sometimes I - and I'm sure you, too - wonder who would have gone home first if season six had started with all 14 queens together, tackling a TV shows-inspired sewing challenge. Would Kelly Mantle really have been B2 over Joslyn, Laganja, Adore and Darienne? Who knows. One thing's for sure though: Magnolia Crawford emerged from season 6 as the biggest loser, with the absolute worst attitude.

The owner of a real name that's far more interesting than her drag name (and indeed a male face that's far more appealing), Magnolia reportedly quit drag after her disastrous S6 showing and the negativity from the season spilled into what is probably the most awkward finale interview of all time. Claiming she hadn't watched the season prompted a rare moment of upfront shade from RuPaul ("I can't... I can't with her.")

She spent Untucked and her lipstick message interview saying she was only there for exposure, and that any publicity is good publicity... which is perhaps why we keep hearing about that Magnolia Crawford four years down the line!

Memorable quote(s): "I'm Magnolia Crawford and I am Seattle's sexiest dr- no I'm not sexy. I am Seattle's funniest- well I'm not funny, either." (At least she had a disclaimer!)
"I'm not changing for no mother****in' Michelle Vie-sarge."
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): "I've got a god-damned bow on my ass!" followed by immediate rejection from Santino/Michelle.

[Mokka]

I'm holding out for a Miss Vanjie win tbh

[RileyH]

Bye Magnolia was a scream

[Wizard.]

Perched for this :love: let Magnolia live god damn it!

[Braden]

"Yes, I should've kept my big fat ****ing mouth shut. I can't, though. I like how I sound."

I'm not gonna lie, I did like Magnolia for the soundbites she provided during her only episode. I think she had potential, but she was out of her depth in such a strong cast. The whole exposure thing was an attempt to retain dignity and power over the situation because she knew she was going home. Another one of my underrated favourite's:

(Magnolia walks over to Joslyn who has almost finished her dress)

"Oh. You've created a production."

[MB.]

Magnolia :love:-ish

Apparently she's started doing drag again? whew look out AS4!

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/9/91/Dax%27s_Entrance.gif/revision/latest?cb=20160506223823
123rd Place: Dax ExclamationPoint (Season 8) - finished joint-last

Some of these rankings may look a little harsh and in all good conscience I am quite aware that they're all capable of good things and good art, so please don't construe these low positions for disrespect (unless I out-and-out trash you, I guess?)

Dax ExclamationPoint... my recollection heading into season eight was that she, one of the early rumours of the cast, was hyped a lot because she was the drag-mother of Violet Chachki. Now, whilst Drag Race has a penchant for tearing down the queens with the most hype and most obvious path/connection to success, I really didn't expect Dax's performance to be what it was.

The editing was extremely dirty in episode two, and that huge prefix of the lipsync with Lucian Piane and RuPaul saying it's the biggest gay anthem of all time, it can't *not* be good, etc., was completely unnecessary and was only included to serve as a big smack for underwhelming. Because there have been far more boring lipsyncs since then that didn't result in a double-sashay (Shea/Nina, Jaymes/Kimora, Farrah/Cynthia) and it's already a kick in the teeth to go home early on, without this insult to injury.

That said, it's hard to feel that bad for Dax when even her exit interview was just... blasé and negative (even pretending to not know what Laila's name was, despite them exiting together).

She was read for having misshapen padding and managed to make a Hello Kitty runway - the same theme her bloody daughter CAME THRUUUUU in!!! - look boring and then had an ugly seaweed/yellow dress combo afterwards that couldn't even be saved by her ripping the yellow off and waving it around in the lipsync.

I will say this in her defence though: that Bitch Perfect challenge was terrific and it sucked that someone had to go home for it, let alone two people.

Memorable quote(s): "I look forward to a nap. And vodka. Lots of vodka."
Best Runway(s): n/a (both sucked, sorry :( )
Best Moment(s): The look of dissatisfaction on Mathu Andersen's face when she goes "YAY!" as her idea of being 'bigger' in the Winners' Circle photoshoot.

[MB.]

I knew I'd meant to include someone else in my Tempest/Carmen/Charlie trifecta... turns out it was Dax, so good call!

To her credit, I guess she 'won' the infamous I Will Survive lip sync, but even that's in the same, very notional way that Honey 'won' against Vivienne

[RileyH]

Excuse you I enjoyed the Farrah/Cynthia lipsync

[MB.]

Excuse you I enjoyed the Farrah/Cynthia lipsync

Well this is certainly one of the most baffling Drag Race opinions I've seen in a while on here

[RileyH]

Farrah better be Top 10

[Shaun]

https://i2.wp.com/towleroad.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/6a00d8341c730253ef00e54f2991958834-640wi.jpg?w=740
122nd Place: Penny Tration (Season 5) - finished last

There is absolutely no justice in the fact that one of the greatest 'names' on the show of all time ended up performing as badly as Penny.

Two queens have made it onto the show as a result of an online voting contest by the fans. One performed pretty well: Darienne Lake made the top four! The other was Penny Tration. And she beat Adore Delano to it. :joker: (disclaimer: I may be wrong but I'm fairly sure it was JUST two online votes)

Indeed, it does seem she was cast for the name alone. The opening episode's underwater mini-challenge of course prompted the customary "deeper, Penny Tration! Deeper!" quips, and Mike Ruiz managed to wrangle in a lame double penetration joke on her only runway.

She was absolutely not cast for learning her words, apparently, and those tricky lyrics to Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA" turned out to be her downfall, and she was sent packing by literature enthusiast Serena Cha Cha (consequently upsetting all of the other queens). She's also potentially the queen who delivered the absolute worst finale/reunion look of all time, rocking up in a reworking of the dress she was eliminated for (embellished with a tiny silver top-hat glued to her face).

She apparently quit drag for a while, but now seems to be back and making pretty good wigs, so it's not all doom and gloom :love:

Memorable quote(s): "To my dear, dear Serena... I would read you but it does appear life already has."
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): Her Mae West runway walk.

[Shaun]

Farrah better be Top 10

She won't even be top ten of AS4 :oh:

[MB.]

Two queens have made it onto the show as a result of an online voting contest by the fans. One performed pretty well: Darienne Lake made the top four! The other was Penny Tration. And she beat Adore Delano to it. :joker: (disclaimer: I may be wrong but I'm fairly sure it was JUST two online votes)

Yessica Wild did not die at Stonewall to be forgotten like this! (iirc Nina Flowers was also a fan vote)

And Adore actually beat Penny by some way, but the producers disregarded the final vote because Adore wasn't ready for season five/they wanted a battle of the Idols on season six :laugh:

[MB.]

(again, out with Phoenix, Alisa, Tempest, Carmen and Charlie. Maybe throw a Delta or a Sonique or a Pearl or a Jaymes Mansfield in there if you fancy. kthxbye)

[Shaun]

I knew I couldn't remember one from S4 so I assumed the idea started in S5, what with the vote being present for AS1 (Mimi Imfurst, number third in the voting? I could not believe it.) :worry:

[Braden]

Dax: Bless, I agree that Ru's commentary before the lip-sync was unnecessary. It felt like the double elimination had been planned in advance.

I don't remember there being any hype around Dax, but she certainly was underwhelming on the show. Part of me wanted her to do well because I liked her entrance look and her drag seemed fun and different, but her personality was flat and she never excelled on the runway.

I do have a bit of pity for Dax, considering she left early in such a cruel way and her drag daughter had just won the season before. I feel like she deserved recognition in the edit for being Violet's drag mother, at least.

Penny: Penny would low on my own ranking. I'm sure she's great live performer, no disputing her abilities as a drag queen. I just didn't care for her on the show at all.

[RileyH]

She won't even be top ten of AS4 :oh:

This is cancelled :idc:

[Headie]

Dax: Bless, I agree that Ru's commentary before the lip-sync was unnecessary. It felt like the double elimination had been planned in advance.

I don't remember there being any hype around Dax, but she certainly was underwhelming on the show. Part of me wanted her to do well because I liked her entrance look and her drag seemed fun and different, but her personality was flat and she never excelled on the runway.

I do have a bit of pity for Dax, considering she left early in such a cruel way and her drag daughter had just won the season before. I feel like she deserved recognition in the edit for being Violet's drag mother, at least.

Yeah I would've liked Dax to have stayed a little longer, I think there was potential hidden away somewhere

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_luq2i9OkeI1qbzqexo1_500.gif
121st Place: Alisa Summers (Season 4) - finished last

A queen for every season, but not this one.

In the hectic cluster**** of Season 4 drama, Alisa is quickly forgotten and it seems a shame really, because of all of the first-boots it certainly seemed that Alisa was one of the more polished and "ready" to compete. Idk why I'm writing that with a hint of regret when I've put her this low but... eh.

Plenty of queens delivered a post-apocaloctic look that was far too clean and pristine; certainly in contrast to Sharon's blood-dripping demon that still, to this day, is one of the show's strongest. The Princess had whiter-than-whites, Madame LaQueer just had a foot on a plate, Kenya Michaels wore a phoenix diaper. So it does seem a shame to pick on poor Alisa for having exploding titties and a fly-swatter (let alone decide to make Kenya one of the top three of the week :umm2:)

I have absolutely no regrets about her going so early since this is one of the rare seasons where everyone else, bar Princess/Lashauwn, had a distinct personality (whether it was good or bad) and both of those two performed well in the challenge that Alisa did not. So... them's the breaks.

All I otherwise remember about Alisa is that she told a story about how she was arrested for driving under the influence, in drag, and had to strip in a police station in front of everyone. She had one line in Untucked and it was "I'm prepared to lipsync just in case" :skull: like I said... completely outshone and sadly left behind in season 4.

Memorable quote(s): "Baked potato couture!"
Best Runway(s): I did actually like her only one, so...
Best Moment(s): Elvira stanning her titties. <3

[RileyH]

Alisa :love:

[Tom4784]

I'd agree with all these tbh.

[Braden]

Yeah, I think Alisa might be my least favourite first boot because I don't have anything to say about her whatsoever. All I remember her for is being monotoned and boring.

[Smithy]

Why is serena cha cha still to come tho

[MB.]

On a more positive note than me constantly baying for the blood of, say, Milk, I'll name a few queens who I'd personally like to see finish considerably higher than where I imagine they'll end up: Kimora, Alexis Michelle, Farrah, Laushauwn, The Princess, Porkchop, Sasha Belle, Mayhem, The Vixen, Vivacious

[RileyH]

On a more positive note than me constantly baying for the blood of, say, Milk, I'll name a few queens who I'd personally like to see finish considerably higher than where I imagine they'll end up: Kimora, Alexis Michelle, Farrah, Laushauwn, The Princess, Porkchop, Sasha Belle, Mayhem, The Vixen, Vivacious

Not Alexis, Princess, Porkchop & Sasha

[MB.]

Yes Alexis, Princess, Porkchop and Sasha

Hence why I put them there

[Shaun]

You thought I might put Mayhem low? :oh:

[MB.]

You thought I might put Mayhem low? :oh:

I thought you might work your way from the top down and forget her :laugh: Well strike her off the list and replace her with... idk, Madame LaQueer?

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/RWaJBFHAxCXHa/giphy.gif
120th Place: Akashia (Season 1) - finished 7th

If you ever want to experience true schadenfreude, take a look at the few Showgirls performances on YouTube starring Akashia. They are varying degrees of disastrous.

Akashia may well indeed be the "original lipsync assassin" but when you consider she only sent home Porkchop and a given-up Tammie Brown, it seems a moot point. Season 1 deserves to be looked at with as much of a filter as is on those cameras, because it's an entirely different show to the behemoth it is today. Queens were themselves, they weren't eager to spout catchphrases, and heck, they didn't even know if the show would make it to air. Filmed 10 years ago now, Akashia is the first of many young, messy, conceited queens that has left with egg on her face.

She is seen as difficult to work with by Rebecca, Ongina and Shannel, and the entirety of episode two is spent quite uncomfortably shutting Tammie Brown down - I am 99% confident had this episode aired today, the screams of bullying would be all over social media - and acting a diva whilst her team construct an (inevitably losing) performance. She struggled, really, to identify her own weaknesses. I think she's also the only contestant to be called an "asshole" by a judge (Frank Gatson).

She did however have the grace to recover from the first ever runway-fall with a little twirl. Did it stop her being sent home by Shannel? No it did not. But Akashia made Michelle Williams cry and in a way, that's better than any run on Drag Race.

Memorable quote(s): "Porkchop looked like a football field."
"Every competition needs a bitch and that bitch is me, and I'm happy with that. I tell it how it is and I'm fierce. :)"
Best Runway(s): I guess her third, even if it did sabotage her.
Best Moment(s): Pronouncing Mahmoud Ahmedinejad as "Moo-man A ham Jeeda. <3
Completely blanking her interview guests (Tori Spelling!!) and not even standing up for them <3

[RileyH]

Akashia deserves better what an underrated goddess

[ethanjames]

akashia is way too low smh

[Shaun]

yes i'm not really a fan of the messy queens that showed a crappy personality and have faded into obscurity since the show ended, sorry

I mean, name a good thing she did...

[Shaun]

https://media.tenor.com/images/1974596399922b5646679c73e39f3518/tenor.gif
119th Place: Charlie Hides (Season 9) - finished 12th

Again, the general impression going into season nine was that Charlie Hides was a fan favourite who was soooooo funny on YouTube and would go really far.

Unfortunately, I already had seen enough of Charlie's videos and impressions to gauge that, uh, she really wasn't all that and I knew she'd struggle.

As the show's - to date - only British queen, Ms. Hides also has the honour of being the show's oldest. Even including the current ages of those on the show ten years ago, I think (someone MB you wanna check that?) But once the sight gag of a creaking '52' appeared in the premiere, the comedy was pretty much over for Charlie Hides.

This is actually the first instance where I feel I'm being overly harsh and she certainly performed better than the likes of, say, Serena Cha Cha or Honey Mahogany, but at the same time... there was such an overwhelming sense of "let-down" around her and she has so many negative aspects about her elimination and performance that I just think: nope. Get this bitch out now.

Miss Hides lasted four episodes with the premiere's non-elimination, and in those four episodes I can honestly say she didn't impress me or make me laugh any more times than a grand total of "once". That occasion? See my "best runway" segment. There are many who claim she was 'robbed' in the Princess challenge and should have had Valentina's spot in the top 3 but honestly? Valentina's "HATEFULLY ever after" was leagues ahead of Charlie's awkward "she's a cunning linguist you know, lol" Cockney accent. Didn't make me laugh, and the starry runway was just... eh :shrug: Then there was her botched Boston pilgrim "hometown runway" reveal that probably would've landed her in the bottom two if a) there was one and b) her Gaga didn't save her.

She of course got injured during the disastrous (seriously, every time someone says an episode is the "worst of all time" I'm just going to shout "NOPE. CHEERLEADING." defiantly. What a stupid, stupid episode. The comedy didn't even work because you couldn't make out what they were saying smh) B52s challenge; she and several others sustained an injury that would go on to hinder her later performances. Was she eliminated for a physical weakness though? No. You'd have to imagine even Charlie without cracked ribs/diarrhoea/migraine/insomnia* wouldn't have been a match for Trinity's "I Wanna Go". And it was her cold, unfunny delivery in the Good Morning Bitches! news challenge that sent her home, stepping all over Cynthia's moments of humour and-THANKS VERY MUCH, IT'S TIME TO GO TO COMMERCIAL.

*delete excuses as appropriate.

AND FINALLY... WEL-well that's about all we have time for right now?

Memorable quote(s): "Could you shut up a second?"
Best Runway(s): Her white-party runway was breathtakingly good, tbf. (https://i.pinimg.com/originals/97/49/24/97492477e54d4a643c6fc99c57e6ddf3.jpg) And her Gaga was technically perfect, too, in the same sense that Farrah "won" the Madonna runway by wearing a carbon copy that drowns you out.
Best Moment(s): Her entrance look was cute <3 Telling Eureka she should've worn big earrings mildly made me laugh?

[Saph]

how embarrassing for us that Charlie is the only British queen to represent us so far

[MB.]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure Charlie is the oldest queen ever, despite the fact that Chad about to die

Speaking of which, Charlie sucked enough on the show as it is (I think the one time I managed to raise as much as a smirk was her Joan of Arc "great ideas, badly executed" read to... Aja? at the reunion, which, considering the things that Aja's gone on to do since compared to Charlie... lol), but she plummets to the nether regions of my personal rankings for three main reasons: this video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axqfI9tTZpk), which is genuinely the least funny thing I've ever seen a Drag Race queen produce and that's saying something, her history of doing blackface and defending it, and generally being a bitter bitch on Twitter as of late while trying to pass it off as shade, coming for The Vixen and Shea on various occasions, which, considering my previous point, is not a good lerk whatsoever

Oh and the other day she got locked in a bathroom stall! #karma

[MB.]

(then again, I found out today that Charlie has the best toot/boot rate of all the season 9 queens, which means that Raven and Raja must have tooted that look where she wore her own name around her neck like some kind of confused senior citizen)

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/db807ccf8060ad7a6528854861e8ac17/tumblr_ol1yb9RvQH1vmm8tlo1_250.gif
118th Place: Serena Cha Cha (Season 5) - finished 13th

Let's get one thing straight: the only reason she hasn't finished lower is because the two episodes of Untucked she was in were a SCREAM and even if it's because she was a messy victim of everyone's abuse, I don't care. Thank you for being that girl.

That said, none of the enjoyment of either episodes were down to her. Far from it, actually: her awkward deprecation of the word "ghetto" and calling all of the other girls uneducated and beneath her really rubbed me up the wrong way. Understandably, Detox and Coco too - although Monica, Roxxxy and Jade also got some solid jabs in before she eventually sashayed.

Serena entered the workroom claiming to be the future of drag and surrounded by some really exciting new movements in the world of drag. Movements like "body sculpture" which went... well...

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/fc/2a/16/fc2a169fb0f908b08783ee4b767ed4a5.png

She found herself in the bottom two in every episode she was in: a feat that had at the time only been set by Akashia (but has since been acheived...lots of times) and was eventually sent home for a lipsyncing challenge where she decided that Raja must cough a lot with the amount of powder on her face for the Marie Antoinette look. I don't know. It's all a mess.

I desperately miss the old Untucked. Whilst heavily edited, the cutaways to Ru going "OOOOOOOO NO SHE BETTER DON'T" when Serena dropped the "ghetto" bomb genuinely had me screaming. Monica shouting to the camera "I need my asthma pump." Ugh. It's honestly iconic.

Memorable quote(s): "I request the floor, ladies!"
Best Runway(s): n/a. Her 2nd was ok but ruined by the flag and, in turn, Kristen Johnston
Best Moment(s): Being called "itty bitty Serena" by Detox for screaming in the workroom, whilst Jinkx mumbles "that was...right next to my ear :("

https://68.media.tumblr.com/82eef5058e60441e948371c96ed7009e/tumblr_ol1yb9RvQH1vmm8tlo3_250.gif

[Shaun]

https://ic.pics.livejournal.com/dearjessie83/63509043/67343/67343_original.gif
117th Place: Carmen Carrera (Season 3) - finished 5th (!?)

I know I said earlier that there was no one on my list, who went past episode 7, until my 103rd queen but that's generally because every time I remember Carmen Carrera I am stunned that she made it as far as she did. Every time I would rewatch season 3 - and that's a lot because it's a fantastic season - I am honestly baffled each episode she is called 'safe'. As the first season to feature Michelle Visage, a fellow New Jersey girl, I can't help but feel a huge hometown bias helped keep Carmen in the game, and the decision to bring Carmen back when only one episode had passed after her first elimination is...probably the most inexplicable in the show's history.

I could, and am tempted to, break this down into an episode-by-episode account of why Carmen SUCKED but I'd be here all day. Let's stick to some highlights:

1) She survives a double-shantay with Yara Sofia. Not only this, but she's told to shantay first. Because she spent the lipsync walking over to the judges' table and kissing Johnny Weir and Santino!? Whilst Yara ripped her dress off and actually did cheerleading? [size=1][Kandy Ho wtf.mp3] All this for a PSA video challenge where the queens are told to send support to the troops overseas. Carmen spends her time dawdling and eventually walks off-set with time to spare. To me that's bad attitude. But eh.
2) Similarly walks away from Rita Rudner during the stand-up comedy challenge and manages to escape unscathed from any comments about unprofessionalism. Is safe this episode and actually delivers one of her best performances in the show (hell, the only good one).
3) Literally every runway being a variation on nudity and minimal sewing/creativity, and getting a free pass every single damn time. The only time it sends her home is when she attempts to transfer it onto her military makeover partner.
4) Completely invisible in every performance challenge: do you remember her in the QNN news task? Her workout routine? Drag Queens in Outer Space? Her J-Lo on Snatch Game? Her reggae version of 'Superstar'? No, didn't think so.
5) No better at the visual challenges - I've already mentioned the task she's sent home (a second time) for, but her Christmas runway is literally a red bikini with a sprig of mistletoe above her ass-cheeks. Her princess cake runway, one of the few times she's comparatively "dressed", is an ugly lime-green monstrosity with a mountain of tulle balanced on her shoulder (https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/3/35/DQmBefm.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/250?cb=20170712122819). Her space-age couture is a giant ring of hair that's slowly ripping her scalp off :joker:

But even if you overlook her lacklustre performances, it's her personality that lands her this low for me. Season 3 is, of course, dominated by Heathers vs. Boogers drama and whilst I certainly don't believe Carmen to be the worst of the bunch (quite the opposite in fact: she's seen talking to Yara/Alexis a lot and even falls for Shangela's mindgames with the RuPaulapalooza challenge and begins to doubt Manila's friendship), her bitchy throwaway comments about other queens being "ugly" just smacked of entitled pretty-girl with no kindness. And then of course there's the off-show spat with RuPaul over the use of the "Oooh girl, you've got she-mail!" line every episode, despite her 'advocacy for trans rights' consisting of... 'look passing and you're ok'. And attacking miss TS Madison for "giving trans women a bad name" or some nonsense.

Like I've said before, she might not deserve to be this low... but it seems only fair given she wants to pretty much erase her history with the show now, and whilst she is indeed a beautiful model... there's really nothing else to her.

Memorable quote(s): "No foam here!"
Best Runway(s): Her USA Runway, where she channels Dita von Teese, by a mile.
Best Moment(s): Deciding that she needs to do a walk-on intro to her workout routine DVD, without any prompts from Ru <3
Bottoming for Raja in the Paula Abdul - Straight Up lipsync, whilst Alexis Mateo expresses disgust at the softcore porn <3

[Tom4784]

Charlie was such a disappointment tbh. Serena was forgettable aside from the Untucked moments and Carmen's a dick. All deserving of low placements.

[Braden]

Akashia: I respect Akashia for being the first person to fill the villain role on Drag Race and the fall/spin deserves its credit. In hindsight (and S1 is one of few seasons I haven't re-watched jsyk), she shies in comparison to other villains that had much better character development.

Charlie Hides: lol, I'd be lying if I said I didn't ironically enjoy Charlie. I remember when the S9 trailer came out and I repeated 'I have unnderweaaarr ollderr than her' a dozen times a day because I was obsessed with the way she said it. She was obviously a flop, but her awful lip-sync was genuinely one of the most compelling moments from last season. Her justification at the reunion was hilarious, too. Was it because of the broken hip? Diarrhoea? Who knows. I loved how ridiculous it was.

Serena Cha Cha: When I first watched S5, I remember feeling quite bad for Serena when the other queens ambushed her. I don't so much anymore. I mean, Drag Race is not the platform to let everyone know how educated you are. Literally, not one person (drag queen or fan) will care.

Awful runways, too. I know we've made fun of Roxxxy in this thread, but '...Except for Serena' will always be iconic.

Carmen Carrera: My thoughts on Carmen are complex. I think when I watched S3 for the first time, I liked Carmen by association because I enjoyed The Heathers—I liked The Boogers as well, which is a testament to how good S3 is. I understand why people dislike, but I still don't think she's as unlikable as people say. I think she was generally harmless and I kinda liked the Jersey persona, her presence was appreciated.

Now, it's kind of difficult to say how I feel about her. I do actually think the hate is overblown, but it is pompous to turn your back on the show that made you. I guess, she doesn't have to blow smoke Ru's arse if she doesn't want to (especially considering recent controversy), and other queens still seem to like and get on with her so she can't be all that bad.

[Shaun]

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/PointlessBoldDiplodocus-max-1mb.gif
116th Place: (Kylie) Sonique (Love) (Season 2) - finished 9th

*looks at the queen I've just preceded Sonique with*

I'm not transphobic, honest.

Sonique is the first queen on Drag Race to reveal that she is, in fact, a trans woman (during the reunion episode, which, for a season full of hateful comments Raven, was a welcome relief and a moment of sincere love and support). Thank god, in the nine years since this season was filmed, the Drag Race community has become so welcoming towards trans queens :unsure:

That taboo topic aside, Sonique's performance on the show is best summarised with a brief shrug. An extremely acrobatic queen, she put in some skilled performances in the poledancing challenge in episode two, and the only lipsync she performed - against Morgan McMichaels, to Stacey Q's "Two of Hearts" - was pretty impressive; so impressive that it was one of the rare occasions where RuPaul had to be excused to make a decision rather than do it on the spot. This happened mostly in the early seasons though (Ongina vs. Bebe was a notable example), so perhaps they just edit that out now. She could've lasted longer, were it not for Morgan's incredibly tight choreography and miming of the words.

But the rest of her time on the show is ultimately forgettable: she did a terrible Lady Gaga snatch game, and was chastised by Tatianna (behind her back :laugh:) for being so dismissive of Mystique ("I almost feel sorry for her", after she'd been eliminated). She did seem a little bit catty and conceited, and I guess the show loves to send a full-of-herself bitch home quite early. Outside of the show, though, she seems genuinely beautiful (https://www.instagram.com/p/Bj2l87vnzdp/?hl=en&taken-by=xosonique) and to have become a nicer person.

Memorable quote(s): "Don't call her your friend if you know that she looks like a hot Walmart mess!"
Best Runway(s): All of them were actually pretty good! Like none were 10/10, but her Gone with the Window was cute, and I liked her cheetah-catwoman outfit she went home in. Mask and all.
Best Moment(s): The awkward silence to her Snatch Game answers of tracks from 'The Fame' <3
Comparing Mystique to Holiday Heart <3 (https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BOTUyNzI1MTMtNWJjNS00OThiLTgwNzYtMjY0ZTUxOGQ4Nz UzXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNjAwODA4Mw@@._V1_.jpg)

[Saph]

Monica shouting to the camera "I need my asthma pump."

:joker:

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/pdxEAbVRJLVvy/giphy.gif
115th Place: Lashauwn Beyond (Season 4) - finished 12th

Let me prefix this harsh ranking by saying the following: I am aware that Lashauwn is an incredibly talented seamstress and has designed dresses for more current girls that may often go unnoticed. Seriously, look at her Instagram. She is talented af. (https://www.instagram.com/lashauwnbeyond/)

The reason she ranks so low here though is of course the fact that she only lasted two episodes, and in both she was just a very demure, shy queen who never got her head in the game and just left all scenes she was in feeling very wishy-washy. She managed a high placing in her first episode, with her "post-apocalockic" world-on-her-head runway, but somehow managed to be read by Michelle at the same time. It was a warning that wasn't heeded, and her whispery wrestling performance sent her home over the Princess (that and taking her heels off before the lipsync even really began, which is a cardinal sin).

I'll keep this one brief though, because I would 100% be in support of Lashauwn returning if only for my fantasy of a "designs-only" season with the likes of Pearl, Kim, Mariah, Aquaria (if she doesn't win), Acid Betty, India Ferrah and Ivy Winters. Clears the way for All Stars to be about performance-based challenges, anyway. But yeah, I don't dislike Lashauwn but her performance on the show was just...quite bad.

Memorable quote(s): "Dida Ritz look a mess... with that dry-as wig and that awful-as makeup"
"THIS IS NOT RUPAUL'S BEST FRIEND RACE"
Best Runway(s): Not a runway but her entrance look was gorgeous :love: but I did prefer her gumball-machine dress to her post-apocalyptic one.
Best Moment(s): Willam managing to drop a reference to Ferdinand Magellan about him <3

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/c2019f573631d7eea1e94e9a8023cf42/tumblr_p2you8kfSO1qk7scno1_500.gif
114th Place: Nicole Paige Brooks (Season 2) - finished 11th

It's still honestly SO weird to me that Season 2 had not one, but two contestants who actually have children: Tyra Sanchez, and Nicole Paige Brooks. I can't actually think of another one (that hasn't adopted, like Tempest DuJour) across all seasons.

Anyway, Nicole Paige Brooks from Atlanta... Georgia! There really wasn't much more to her tenure on the show beyond her introduction, other than feeling betrayed at the finale when she'd found out how Raven had talked behind her back. This might have been the setup for a VICIOUS attack from Tatianna that was skin-crawlingly awkward, but it's hard to say that Nicole played a vital role in this.

She was the first to enter, and I guess that means she has the original "workroom entrance" since season 1 was a weird just... "walk on from the side" affair. But that means it's been almost ten years since her oft-quoted entrance, and personally? I wouldn't be totally against her popping up on an Allstars :eyes: perhaps one of those "underrated / early boot queens" seasons everyone keeps rooting for

I found it disheartening that Kim Chi would use her as a punchline 6 years later, let alone the fact that RuPaul laughed at it. This show has a pretty funny way of "supporting" its older queens :sad:

Memorable quote(s): bit obvious, this one
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): Having a photo of her drag mother disappear in the Workroom </3

[Saph]

Nicole was low-key iconic

[Braden]

Sonique: I can definitely tell we're in the 'don't really care or have much to say' zone.

I can't remember much about Sonique, other than feeling sorry for her at the reunion. She had potential to be an amusing shady bitch, as we saw glimpses in Untucked (Holiday Heart, lmao). It never really came to fruition, though. She left at the right time.

Lashauwn Beyond: Another one who had potential, which never amounted to much. Mostly, I blame her early exit on that. S4 had some of my least favourite queens of all time (Kenya, Milan, Phi Phi (though, I've grown to appreciate her iconic villain status) and others who I really didn't care for (The Princess, Madame LaQueer, DiDa Ritz), so personally I wouldn't have minded seeing more of Lashauwn in place of one of those queens.

Nicole Paige Brookes from Atlanta, Georgia: She's legendary, purely for the tagline we all know her for. I dunno, I also think Nicole is quite underrated. I loved her random "scuse me, pardon me" while Shangela and Sahara were screaming at each other during the workroom entrances, lmao. Also, I love that she may still hold a bit of random resentment towards Raven, judging by this simple bit of shade (2:58) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POJWoFHvYrk). In addition, this (2:50 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjxwA6ALT2g)).

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/3og0IynE9E9m3esZmo/giphy.gif
113th Place: Victoria 'Porkchop' Parker (Season 1) - finished last

Tf is she even eating there, is that bird seed?

So, the very first to sashay away. Despite all of the name drops at consequent finales and live tapings - not to mention a namedrop in Alaska's Allstars verse - Porkchop is not an iconic queen and her one episode of airtime was really pretty lacklustre. The show can extend an olive branch to one queen every now and then but this inconsistency with who they decide to boost post-show is a little bit strange: why Vanjie and Porkchop all the time? I'm sure Kelly Mantle and Phoenix could do with the airtime :(

Porkchop, though, is an enduring presence in the show and it should be noted that she has a history of winning pageants that, I think, is still happening to this day. Would I mind seeing her on the show again? Absolutely not. But that one episode consisted of her throwing mild shade towards Akashia and Rebecca Glasscock for their Dimestore looks, touching on how different drag was in the 80s with tales of being shot-at outside a nightclub, and saying she wouldn't mind if Bebe went home :unsure: Perhaps in a parallel universe, she did.

Since the show she's appeared on 'Botched'. She's also, uh... lipsyncing to Lil Kim's "How Many Licks". (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQjxJQ2ytaY) And J-Lo's "Dance Again. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSryAMmdggI) Girl has energy!

Memorable quote(s): "Ooh I like it, I like it! Slap me!"
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): Her facial reaction to the AS2 standup comedy challenge <3
Slaying Vanessa Hudgens in the heavily edited and biased lipsync on AS3 </3

[Saph]

mess we love porkchop

[Braden]

https://rtvwarriors.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/img_07321.png?w=470

I had to post it since you mentioned it. Also, Porkchop follows me on Twitter so I feel obligated to like her. Seriously, I do appreciate Porkchop as the first queen to sashay away. It felt right. She's vibrant and different to a lot of queens we see on the show, especially nowadays.

[Braden]

Okay, this is nice and all, but Pearl needs to ****.

[Tom4784]

Porkchop </3

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/dh9I74FoLu1jy/giphy.gif
112th Place: Phoenix (Season 3) - finished 12th

OK so when I was compiling this list I actually started at the bottom, deciding who was the worst, and who's kinda forgettable and bland... and I can honestly say, hand on heart, that placing these two queens side by side was a complete coincidence and not just a shallow excuse to use the iconic GIF above. Of course, I am absolutely SHOOK and cackling at this coincidence, but that is all it is.

Phoenix finishes below India for a whole bunch of reasons: she was eliminated before her anyway, her entrance makeup is slightly messier, and she isn't quite as celebrated today by other graduates of the show. Phoenix's two episodes in season three saw her deliver possibly the worst acting performance of all time (but, oddly, looked EXACTLY like Emily Blunt if she had mumps?), and snatch poor Venus D'Lite's idea to crush up baubles and use the glass to decorate her jacket. The difference here, though, is that Phoenix's looked good.

Memorable quote(s): "India's very painted, she's very like... old school kind of drag. Which is cool to see, like, that kind of drag still... amongst us... so... :)"
"I just broke my Christian Dior sunglasses doing this, I better win this ****! Ugh!"
Best Runway(s): Her Christmas runway is cute!
Best Moment(s): n/a tbh? I always found it funny she was sent home for copying Gaga's moves to 'Bad Romance' when Delta just... fistpumped? :unsure:

-----------------------------------------------

111th Place: India Ferrah (Season 3) - finished 10th

Managing two more episodes than her doppelganger, and surviving a mauling by Miss Mimi Imfurst in the process, India falls out of my ranking with quite a crash, and one that I'm not particularly comfortable with because the general consensus among the drag community is that India is one of the most polished, the most creative and best showgirls around. So I'd really be happy to see India pop up on an Allstars. But her time on season three was just a little bit invisible, really.

She was in the bottom two twice, being sent home by Stacy Layne Matthews to "Meeting in the Ladies Room" by Klymaxx (a very underrated lipsync tbh, both do very well and Stacy's aggressive "DON'T. SLAP. ME. COS I'M NOT IN THE MOOD." is a scream). I think I will have the moment she pushes Mimi away, once she's dropped, flash before my eyes as I die, as well. So I guess India was involved in two semi-iconic lipsyncs.

But my lasting impression of India on the show was her Weathergirl report: the awkward crack in her voice when she warns us about a "HAIIIIIL-no storm" :joker: and disastrous attempts at injecting a southern twang. Up against Yara on the other team, who was screaming about her ass being on fire, she just stood no chance :( Like I said, though, right now her drag is hella good and she always delivers a LOOK at the reunions and finales.

Oh and of course, the season 8 finale where she is escorted out of the theatre by Mimi, so Porkchop can have a seat, is a SCREAM <3

Memorable quote(s): "Prison, honey."
"I look over and Mimi puts on this headpiece and... I think she looks like Uncle Fester from the Addams Family, honestly."
"GET HER OFF ME"
Best Runway(s): All were pretty good but I'd go with her dominatrix-ringmaster thing in episode 3. Billy B hated it, and he had no taste, so it's a win-win. (https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lm6z2um0ub1qbzqexo1_400.gif)
Best Moment(s): She gave a lot of perfect stink-faces, notably in response to Mimi giving her an "I was picked up by Mimi Imfurst..." t-shirt at the reunion <3

[Tom4784]

Both are justified placements tbh. Phoenix is forgettable and India only came into her own after the show.

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/d/db/Honey_Mahogany_caftan_dress.gif/revision/latest?cb=20160223202446
110th Place: Honey Mahogany (Season 5) - finished joint 10th

Another queen who has perhaps finished far higher than she deserves to in this ranking based on how much she's #Glowedup since her season (https://www.instagram.com/p/BcXvFVUBKk1/?hl=en&taken-by=honeymahogany), Honey spent most of her workroom and talking heads segments defending herself and saying how in San Francisco "the look doesn't matter"; attempting to justify her Kaftan collection on the runway.

Unfortunately for Honey, performance did matter and although she delivered a brilliant spoken lipsync as Mystique Summers Madison in the second main challenge, she was pretty stiff and wooden during the rest. Her kids TV character was mildly fun but lumbered with a disastrous performance from Coco Montrese that meant she got dragged down to the bottom with it, but it was her awkward Diana Ross impression in the ballet challenge that landed her in the bottom two with Vivienne.

As the far nicer and more congenial of the two to double-sashay, I do have a soft spot for Honey Mahogany and she's another queen that falls into my "queens I'd like to see return, one day" category, but if we're to base this rankdown largely on their original seasons then yeah, Honey Mahogany is not a top-100 queen. :(

In her defense: she seems one of the most politically active and #woke queens the show has churned out, so props to her for that :clap1:

Memorable quote(s): n/a :worry:
Best Runway(s): n/a but her entrance look is pretty killer! Even if it gets read straight away.
Best Moment(s): "Honey dances like a white chick! That was... interesting :D" - Jinkx <3
Unveiling a brand new look at the reunion that was a bit of a mess because of her ridiculous hair <3

[RileyH]

Queen of Kaftans :love:

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/4ccf618719cfff7a9548aeab647c4e0f/tumblr_p6b11cQBhC1qk7scno1_500.gif
109th Place: Kalorie Karbdashian Williams (Season 10) - finished 13th

This is where the eliminations start to hurt, or I've been extremely spiteful and placed them far lower than anyone else would </3 Kalorie falls into the former category, because, as with most early eliminations this season, her exit was heartbreaking. Not undeserved, but her tears - and indeed the tears from Asia and others - were pretty hard to take.

Kalorie entered the season pretty much everyone's surefire bet to be the first to sashay away, and I'm sure most viewers would rather she had instead of Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, but let's not lie America: facts are facts. Kalorie assassinated her the second she ripped money from her titties and made it rain. Unfortunately for her, she tanked her first performance-based challenge in the PharmaRusical but I can't help but wonder if she was screwed over a little with favourable choreography for the other girls (a la everyone bar Thorgy in AS3)

A friend of pretty much all the other girls, she probably would've gone on to piss more fans off if she'd stayed because of her workroom entrances with Eureka; but she at least got to exit with a pretty good reception AND a lipsync that wasn't totally embarrassing. Kalorie is adorable, and I hope she has a bright future ahead of her :love: I just can't justify putting her any higher in this list.

Memorable quote(s): "Calories are friends. And food. :bawling:"
"She [Monet] looked like a Flintstone with sponges. Yaba-daba-don't."
Best Runway(s): Definitely her 'best drag' look, even if it was entirely basic compared to the other girls. It was pretty.
Best Moment(s): Coming for Monet and Vixen in Untucked ep. 1 took some balls <3

[Tom4784]

I just didn't care for her at all tbh.

[Moniqua]

her mug is SO underrated

[RileyH]

kalorie was just there

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/7a903ed9216ac9762b7c43f2585d80f9/tumblr_mhcviyZtoD1rthi3ao1_400.gif
108th Place: Monica Beverly Hillz (Season 5) - finished 12th

For someone with such a brief amalgamation of pretty shoddy runway looks, Monica sure could stomp for the gods and had crazily good legs, before Ms. Smalls came and monopolised them.

Monica lasted three episodes and sadly her only really memorable moment - aside from her laughs during THAT episode of Untucked - is her tearfully revealing her trans status as explanation as to why she wasn't able to compete with her head in the game. In the two performances she delivered, she landed in the bottom two (first for a lacklustre Jiggly Caliente; second for a disastrous inability to remember her lines in the Kids TV challenge despite them being in her lap) and you can't really argue with that. She ended up being the first of many victims of Coco Montrese's lipsyncs.

A quick glance of her Instagram page tells me she's pretty solidly booked all of the time and has glowed up a lot since her Drag Race days, which is nice!

Memorable quote(s): "I was ready to pick up that table and bash her head with it. She's lucky I signed a contract..."
Best Runway(s): None were great but her first episode outfit was cute, even if it completely missed the point of the challenge (a Hollywood runway).
Best Moment(s): Absolutely murdering Serena Cha Cha.

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/QOyR.gif
107th Place: Mystique Summers Madison (Season 2) - finished 10th

Another queen who has really started to shine after a slightly messy season, Mystique is now a slimmer, more confident drag queen and exactly the sort of person I'd like to see get a redemption - if you are of the camp that thinks her Season 2 showing was disastrous, of course. The first season with Untucked means Mystique was also essentially involved in the first ever Untucked fight - with Morgan - spawning the show's first ever catchphrase: "BITCH I AM FROM CHICAGO".

Her anger and frustration with the other queens was largely justified; the Raven clique (Sonique, Morgan) and indeed the neutrals (Tyra, Sahara) seemed to look down on Mystique with every opportunity, and it was only Tatianna that seemed to defend her - and indeed would pick up the nitpicking from the more 'polished' queens after Mystique's departure.

In the performances, Mystique killed the poledancing challenge with her signature splits, but otherwise struggled. Her curtains dress in the first episode was unarguably the worst of the lot, and the fact she was saved for doing a spinning split on her way back offstage is honestly baffling to me (but hey, it meant we got a KILLER lipsync with Shangela/Sahara). It would come back to haunt her though, when she was eventually sent home for wearing a random purple blouse in the "country" runway (because she "didn't want to offend her friends back home" in Texas) despite not being as bad in the challenge as, say, Raven and Sonique.

Raven's "I Hear You Knocking" is a very underrated lipsync and ultimately sent Mystique home, and whilst Mystique delivered a handful of iconic moments, she ultimately tanked at Drag Race and thus fails to make my top 100.

LatibmtTkho

Memorable quote(s): "You piss me off some more, I will WHOOP YOUR ****ING ASS. BITCH, I AM FROM CHICAGO."
"SWEETIE. Guess what? You're not worth it, lemme walk off."
"I do not want this tape of me crying :mad: I do not."
"I'M TRYING TO ****ING EXPLAIN MYSELF WILL PEOPLE JUST SHUT THE **** UP :oh:"
Best Runway(s): Her second one was the only good one, so...
Best Moment(s): Pandora's "hahahahahahaha what the **** is that?" when confronted with Mystique's photoshopped baby picture for a later challenge because she lost all her family photos in a fire <3 (I use <3 in the most loving way, of course)

[Tom4784]

I can't even remember Monica tbh but I remember liking Mystique </3

[MB.]

Mystique inventing wearing the exact same thing you wore in the challenge on the runway <3 Chi Chi could never

On the subject of ranking, I used the rpdrsorter on Tumblr as a semi-accurate way of finding out what my overall opinions are, and I get the feeling that your list isn't going to look much like mine:

1 Willam
2 Jujubee
3 Shangela
4 Bianca Del Rio
5 Tammie Brown
6 Katya
6 Kennedy Davenport
8 Jinkx Monsoon
9 Trinity Taylor
9 Aquaria
11 Shea Couleé
11 Asia O'Hara
11 Kameron Michaels
14 Chi Chi DeVayne
15 Alyssa Edwards
16 Valentina
17 Bob The Drag Queen
18 Mrs. Kasha Davis
19 Mariah
19 Stacy Layne Matthews
21 Ginger Minj
22 Alaska
23 Jasmine Masters
24 Joslyn Fox
25 Alexis Matteo
26 Jessica Wild
27 Monique Heart
28 Jiggly Caliente
29 BeBe Zahara Benet
30 Latrice Royale
31 Thorgy Thor
32 Nina Flowers
33 The Vixen
34 Dida Ritz
35 Tyra Sanchez
36 Alexis Michelle
37 Violet Chachki
38 Chad Michaels
38 Sharon Needles
38 Coco Montrese
41 Tatianna
42 Trinity K. Bonet
42 Darienne Lake
44 Yara Sofia
44 Manila Luzon
46 Acid Betty
47 Courtney Act
48 Adore Delano
49 Kimora Blac
50 Mayhem Miller
51 Monét X. Change
52 Raja
53 Peppermint
54 Mimi Imfurst
55 Phi Phi O'Hara
56 Farrah Moan
57 Eureka
58 Kim Chi
59 Nina Bo'Nina Brown
60 Aja
61 Victoria (Porkchop) Parker
62 Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
63 Ongina
63 Shannel
65 Naomi Smalls
66 Lineysha Sparx
67 Jaidynn Diore Fierce
68 Blair St. Clair
69 Yuhua Hamasaki
70 Sasha Velour
71 Cynthia Lee Fontaine
72 Vivacious
73 Roxxxy Andrews
74 Sahara Davenport
75 Madame LaQueer
75 Kenya Michaels
77 Jade Jolie
78 April Carrion
79 The Princess
80 Dusty Ray Bottoms
81 LaShawn Beyond
82 Sasha Belle
83 Gia Gunn
84 Monica Beverly Hillz
85 BenDeLaCreme
86 Laganja Estranja
87 Ivy Winters
88 Miz Cracker
89 India Ferrah
90 Milan
91 Derrick Barry
92 Mystique Summers Madison
93 Max
94 Miss Fame
95 Jade
96 Rebecca Glasscock
97 Morgan McMichaels
97 Pandora Boxx
99 Kalorie Karbdashian Williams
100 Raven
101 Akashia
102 Robbie Turner
103 Laila McQueen
104 Naysha Lopez
105 Milk
106 Trixie Mattel
107 Jaymes Mansfield
108 Kandy Ho
109 Serena Cha Cha
110 Kelly Mantle
110 Magnolia Crawford
112 Detox
113 Honey Mahogany
114 Nicole Paige Brooks
115 Venus D-Lite
116 Dax ExclamationPoint
117 Penny Tration
118 Sonique
119 Charlie Hides
120 Tempest DuJour
121 Pearl
122 Alisa Summers
123 Phoenix
124 Delta Work
124 Carmen Carrera
126 Vivienne Pinay

[Saph]

Kalorie was a good queen she was just a little too unpolished compared with most of the other girls on season 10

[Shaun]

I am prepared for the outrage, but at the same time I am as uninterested in it as I was in her!

https://tribzap2it.files.wordpress.com/2017/04/damn-kimora-gif.gif?w=1100
106th Place: Kimora Blac (Season 9) - finished 13th

The rumours that Kimora Blac may be in Allstars 4 further baffle me. Her status as one of season nine's more popular/memey queens also baffles me. Kimora lasted two three episodes and whilst she dominated the talking heads, it was for... largely vapid and nasty reasons? Saying Jaymes was a 1 and she was a 10, whining "nobody cares" about Aja's wardrobe, not knowing how to sew, complaining about the challenges, and coming for Miss Cucu after 10 damn minutes!

She got confused in Untucked about whether or not she had had plastic surgery, she wore the worst White Party and Lady GaGa runways (bar, perhaps, Valentina and her shake'n'go wig), she delivered one of the show's most sinisterly creepy characters in Funky Monkey, and she just never really got a chance to showcase anything...um...good?

She's just... incredibly dumb and there's absolutely nothing about her that interests me. She cannot hold a conversation. I get that I've been trying to find positives in every queen I've highlighted thus far, but with Kimora the status that she's gained as this hilarious scene-stealer in season 9 is just wildly inaccurate. She could grow in the future, sure, but she's a recent elimination and that's it, really.

Memorable quote(s): "What's an adjetive? [sic]", "What are bloomers?", etc. etc. Truly the Brian Belo of Drag Race :idc:
Best Runway(s): I actually really liked Princess Banana Lady! She should've been safe for that outfit over Farrah/Shea tbh.
Best Moment(s): The judges' extremely mild laughter when she sashays saying "I'm pretty! :)"

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/6UTTSdgY59Sh2/giphy.gif
105th Place: Kenya Michaels (Season 4) - finished 9th / "5th"

My most-liked comment on the Drag Race reddit was in a general "unresolved Drag Race mysteries" topic, and it was this: what on earth happened between Kenya Michaels leaving everyone a letter in Untucked that supposedly tore everyone bar Phi Phi to shreds, and her being welcomed back to the top five with open arms and literally no hostility whatsoever? Seriously:
- She said Jiggly should've gone home week one and that this wasn't a school, but a competition.
- Said Dida should burn a dress when she gets home
- Said Sharon won't go far because she can't walk in heels
- And accused Willam of wearing clothes from... *gulp* Forever 21.

Now, I've seen lots of people say this was just entirely fabricated by the producers for drama but I can't really see how they'd get away with putting it all on a queen that was about to be brought right back :shrug:

From the moment she stepped in, everyone clocked Kenya Michaels as the one to beat: most notably resident judge Billy B, in what would be one of his last ill-advised judgments before crawling back under the ugly rock he came from. Other judge Mike Ruiz, however, clocked her for making a weird air-gulping face with every single take of her photo shoot. This is but a small example of the things I found utterly bewildering - and not in a good way - about Lil' Kenya Michaels.

She was immediately derogatory about her Puerto Rican sister, Madame Laqueer, famously rejecting her high-five in the Glamazons vs. Champions TV commercial challenge and later quipping that "Puerto Rico is embarrassed by Madame LaQueer". How many challenges did you win, again, Kenya? :idc: Then, of course, there was her Snatch Game. Of course, it's now almost a tradition for someone to deliver a terrible Beyonce impression, but I am quite resolute in saying that Kenya's was the dirt-WORST. At least Tyra played with Sahara's Whitney and Tati's Britney, and Asia managed to get the Vixen to shut up for a second it's time to go to commercial. Falling off her chair, farting, and shouting I'M A SURVIVOR. I'M A SURVIVOR. Girl.

Perhaps smaller gripes I have with Kenya:
- She managed a "high" placement in the aforementioned TV commercial challenge despite the fact that she literally looks to the camera, breaks character, and laughs with RuPaul IN IT. :umm2:
- She is one of many COMPLETELY WASTED returning queen twists who immediately got obliterated by a fan favourite. Michelle Visage made some god-damn terrible decisions with this twist. (For the record, I'd have brought back Laqueer or Milan over her).
- The fact she wasn't bottom two for her "butch prison guard", even if she was miscast. That supercut of her hand-claps and inability to follow a cue were infinitely worse than Madame's EWWWWWWWs.

I appreciate that the language barrier for Kenya was massive and I cringe whenever Ru and the other girls reduce the latino queens to random catchphrases and stereotypes (ie. shout "ESCANDALO!" every three minutes), but with Kenya I just got the impression that the only thing that didn't need translating with her was her total lack of star-power and decent personality.

Memorable quote(s): "MAMA ES NAWWWWWWT... WHATCHU SAY. ES WHAT. CHU. DO."
"HMM.... I KINDA LIKE.... THIS SMELL. :smug:"
Best Runway(s): Whatever theme this was. (https://78.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m00qphqbFV1r505p0.jpg)
Best Moment(s): Chiming in with "JESUS IS A BIS-KWIT..." after a moment's silence following the legendary AT LEAST I AM A SHOWGIRL, BITCH argument.
Also... her WTF Wrestling challenge was pretty stellar.

[RileyH]

Kimora :love:

I don't particularly like Kenya but I would probably have LaQueer & Milan before her :p

[MB.]

Kimora inexplicably being the one chosen to host WOW Presents' replacement for UNHhhh is one of my favourite things about season nine :love:

[Black Dagger]

Kimora sucked

[Tom4784]

Kimora was terrible tbh but I'd have placed her above Kenya.

[montblanc]

i don't watch but this one looks iconic

https://i.gifer.com/QOyR.gif

[MB.]

i don't watch but this one looks iconic

https://i.gifer.com/QOyR.gif

The gif seems to be invisible

A Kameron Michaels tea?

[MB.]

(by which I mean it doesn't seem to exist) (a Robbie Turner's Uber driver tea?)

[Shaun]

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d1/SailorMoon56/rollingeyesDelta.gif
104th Place: Delta Work (Season 3) - finished 7th

That I am eliminating two major players of season 3 quite so early should go some distance into explaining why exactly I was Team Boogers. Don't get me wrong, I loved Raja, but she was surrounded by such a nasty and childish little clique and I think the epicentre of it was here: Delta Work.

Delta's now picked up a strong reputation for being the kind of girl who vaguebooks (ie. puts up statuses about "someone being a bitch" but then refusing to name who it is) and spreading West Hollywood bitchiness among her colleagues, with a whole host of choice words to say about Trixie Mattel, the fans, Valentina and Willam. Which I suppose is fitting, because going by her on-show antics, she is essentially only remembered for being a sour-faced bitch with nothing nice to say about anyone else bar her friends.

https://i.redd.it/xgoclbj6dgiy.png

In the performances, she somehow managed her only "high" ranking by delivering....this:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-PUaQ9yivIhE/TXAMynWS5TI/AAAAAAACZF8/pEqIhRHpebs/s1600/RPDRE6P2%252B29.jpg

Yeah, I don't know either. She did FINE at the workout challenge, by placing that shaky weight thing between her tits and jumping up and down, but was ultimately outshone by Miss Stacy Layne Matthews and her fried chicken :love: and it kickstarted Delta's insecurity and bitchy comments about Stacy's runways. She BOMBED the acting challenge and scraped through by sending a lacklustre Phoenix home, cried over having to strip for a naked photo shoot, cried over her inability to make Rita Rudner laugh... need I go on? She tanked drag race.

But my #1 gripe with her is her comments about Stacy Layne. "She doesn't need to be here", "she's the booger of the group", "go on hoarders [not Drag Race]", "I don't think any of her shoes cost a whole $40", "I should've gone with a fat celebrity and put a chicken wing in my mouth because it would've progressed me; it obviously progressed Stacy", "she is inferior to me". The list goes on.

In the end she was eliminated - despite being a comedy queen - in the standup challenge with a disastrous routine about wanting to be raped. Yikes. And now she's giving RuPaul terrible wigs now that Mathu Andersen's disappeared. (https://i.imgur.com/RQQ3sFw.jpg)

On the plus side: she gave Shangela her free phonecall home. But then Phi Phi O'Hara gave hers away, too, so maybe it's not always the gesture of a good bitch.

Memorable quote(s): "Did I read? Absolutely. Did I talk ****? Absolutely."
Best Runway(s): Errm... this one? (http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FW86_jO7k_A/TUCI8Pupl1I/AAAAAAACTaM/uyKItT-cnb4/s1600/RPDR%252BS3%252B1%252BDW%252B1.jpg)
Best Moment(s): GOING. HOME.

[RileyH]

Delta is still too high

[lewis111]

It’s disgusting she managed to outlast the more charismatic and lovable Stacey

[Shaun]

https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/tRkduv9mk2lrnSfrNHe82IcZp7LYn8I739W_cDJoePzMJG4krP 4KDgLVBGcAa9V4x4APNMl9OMMpvpeaVABKnDFOj9Oc-4Xg45GnEKUFwZU1PBHUW8Gqp5JIAN_6RuH6iv3q_gD-
103rd Place: Derrick Barry (Season 8) - finished FIFTH!

Let me prefix this by saying that I know her drag has improved DRASTICALLY since season eight and I'm resigned to the fact that she'll be on a future Allstars. But every time I rewatch season eight I just...ugh it's exhausting. The idea that she lasted longer than Thorgy, Betty and Robbie is criminal. Because... let's break it down episode by episode.

Episode one: Derrick is the 100th queen. "It's Derrick bitch!" yes yes very funny. Makes use of a chair in the Winners' Circle photoshoot. Somehow makes the top three of the challenge because of it; judges apparently ignore the fact she's wearing a bikini and some mistletoe on her ass. NO.
Episode two: Completely disappears in the Bitch Perfect performance except for some random Britney choreo. Thinks people go to movie premieres looking like this. (https://static1.squarespace.com/static/522d3576e4b0069c1e7db0d5/t/56e98957c6fc08d4c89dd569/1458145627084/) NO.
Episode three: "THIS IS MY DAY, I WAS BORN THIS WAY, AND MY BIGGEST SECRET I-IS..." yeah that Empire challenge was tragic. Somehow avoids bottom two despite doing worse than both Robbie AND Cynthia. Should've 100% been Derrick vs. Cynthia, but they wanted a roller-skating lipsync and Robbie was the only one who could do it. Tea. Confirmed. Don't @ me.
Episode four: "WE ARE THE GIRLS. OF. DRAGOMETRY." Sings in a horrible nasal voice despite repeated requests not to by Lucian and Chi Chi. Avoids bottom two AGAIN because Debbie Harry thought it was nice that she tried to sing, I guess? Naysha was robbed here, her runway was breathtaking. Derrick's neon, however... (https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cg8uWOhWwAAgOoC.jpg)
Episode five: The worst Snatch Game across all ten seasons, thanks to the soulless guests (Gigi Hadid and Chanel Iman). They lap her Britney impression up despite making a grand total of, like, two jokes. Chi Chi's Eartha Kitt was ROBBED of a top 3 here. Also delivers the most boring kimono (https://78.media.tumblr.com/da98f79a97bd581fc77fb2d8c018eeb5/tumblr_o54wobuXKg1qlvwnco4_400.gif) bar Naomi's.
Episode six: FINALLY LANDS IN THE BOTTOM TWO, for a HORRIFIC Tin Man costume. "There was a hem everywhere". Gave us Michelle's iconic "....it's...a piece of fabric." line :love: sadly outperformed Robbie, but I wish Chi Chi had sent her packing.
Episode seven: "Wins a challenge" because she's partnered with Bob. Admittedly her performance was good: she committed to eating a baby and gave a stiff, awkward Conservative character. But... that's because she is a stiff, awkward Conservative character.
Episode eight: FINALLY GOES. But not before she drops off this HORRIFYING brow (http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s238/petstarr/Drag%20Race/Drag%20Race%208/derrickbaby.jpg).

That's one good week and even then it was shared with Bob's - let's face it - far more impressive comedic timing. But what bothers me the most about Derrick's tenure on Season eight is just how joyless and mean she was the entire time; firing shots at Bob like "can you give me some tips on how to do ratchet drag next week?" (thankfully clapped right the **** back by Bob), spending the entire Book Ball episode telling Naomi she has no personality, terrible hairlines and no talent.

https://3r36xa14nkfk34uqku13185l-wpengine.netdna-ssl.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Marge-Simpson.jpg

4sS_HhJ7ayU

She just has terrible delivery and whether or not it was playful shade, I just got the overwhelming impression she was an incredibly narcissitic, shallow, nasty person. I'm set to be proved wrong in the future, but even off-show she's drunkenly making a mess of herself, and doesn't know what Stonewall was, so whatever. Hated her season 8 tenure. Don't necessarily hate the girl. Might though.

Also part of my hate for Derrick stems from my belief that Britney Spears is the most overrated, over-worshipped celebrity of all time and is a no-talent hack who should've faded into the obscurity currently being enjoyed by Michelle Branch.

Memorable quote(s): Robbie: "Derrick you're an impersonator!"
Derrick: "Yeah I impersonate celebrities, I can't impersonate YOU."
Best Runway(s): I was actually a fan of her Roller Girl look :love:
Best Moment(s): Having her entire ass handed to her by Bob the Drag Queen. "I will never cry because of you...ever!" Bob: "Don't give me a challenge." <3

[Tom4784]

The only thing I like her for is her drunken roast tbh. She was a HORROR on her season.

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/362bf861fe55802b0c74053a1df29a8c/tumblr_inline_p7lvk81O5x1rtczr8_500.gif
102nd Place: The Princess (Season 4) - finished 11th

Now I think about it, I don't think there's another queen who delivered three extremely strong runway looks before she had to sashay away :think: Billy B hated her "pretty in pink" hair but then he was committing atrocities of his own on Michelle Visage's face at the time so who the hell was he to judge?

Princess is best remembered as the victim of the greatest lipsync of all time. Yes, it still owns that title! Miss. Dida. Did. That. :clap1: But the sad thing is, if you concentrate on Princess at the time, and indeed look at the performance she gave to send home Lashauwn Beyond, it's quite clear to see that she's also a capable and pretty good lipsyncer :( Girl just came up against a legend.

Zlc-_NXWano

When she wasn't fighting for survival, The Princess was struggling to get her voice heard. Or, indeed, actually speak. Her wrestling character was somehow even quieter than Lashauwn's, and got completely steamrolled by her teammate Jiggly Caliente. Princess then spent the workroom segment immediately afterwards telling everyone how Jiggly did terribly, should be in the bottom two, stole her thunder, etc. etc. etc.

Come to think of it, Princess was an incredibly bitter queen at the reunion as well; quipping "if I was more of a character, like Willam, I probably could've stuck around longer because I had more to show, and frankly, what came after me after I was kicked off, down the runway, was kinda lame". Lashauwn gives her a high-five for this, but the audience largely shrugs.

The only other thing I remember about the Princess was saying that she was attracted to Sharon's "meth look" out of drag. So... no top 100 for her. :nono: She is one of the few early-season queens that I think still has enough polish and aesthetics to maybe do well at a future Allstars, though.

Memorable quote(s): "Order now! And other favourite hits! The pit crew is standing by :D"
"Do you feel like you've come to the end of your road?" - an actual line delivered in the challenge she's sent home for <3333
Best Runway(s): Definitely her Waterworld 'post-apocalyptic' look, but as mentioned, all 3 are good.
Best Moment(s): Chad Michaels urgently trying to mime "do the line" as they try to host RuPaul's 'Glamazon' CD advert together.

[Tom4784]

I liked her tbh.

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/5/51/Jaymes-1491232899.gif/revision/latest?cb=20170711134330
101st Place: Jaymes Mansfield (Season 9) - finished 14th

For someone only around for two episodes, I have a lot of feelings about Jaymes Mansfield :( the season 9 girls' patronising of her in both episodes was extremely uncomfortable and seemed to serve no other purpose than reinforcing their soul-selling BS to RuPaul's various pseudo-psychological mantras. She hasn't found her identity, she was just a big fish in a small pond, she crumbled under pressure, etc etc etc. And it's rare that you'll hear me have a bad word to say about Cynthia Lee Fontaine, but when she and Nina Bo'Nina Brown were picking their cheerleading teams, and Nina makes a point of choosing Jaymes because she "has a soft spot for the underdog" (again: unnecessary :( ), Cynthia quips "she [Nina] was just doing community service [by picking Jaymes]" and it's HONESTLY STILL INFURIATING. WE WERE ROOTING FOR YOU, CUCU. RETURN YOUR CONGENIALITY TITLE NOW. Ugh, it was just crushing seeing Jaymes immediately forced into this "struggling outsider" role.

Unfortunately, loveable as she is, she also happened to get the series' seminal "queen cannot grasp a basic ****ing concept" moment, a la Alyssa's "doo wah" in AS2 or Kim Chi's "WHAT a fat ass?" in season eight. Her inability to step in time and introduce herself in the cheerleading routine is honestly exhausting, and one of those rare moments where you watch and just wonder...how...did they get here? Producer Alexis Michelle soon saw an end to this floundering, though, and seized her floozy character and lumbered Jaymes with a lacklustre "snoozy" character.

I actually didn't think her lipsync against Kimora was that bad, but the moment she copied Kimora and started trying to lie down on the floor seductively at the same time, was the killer blow, I guess. I hope we get some form of Rudemption in the future, but she seems to be doing very well and has a lot of fans for a first-eliminee so maybe we're all good. :love:

Memorable quote(s): "Hi shapeshifters!"
"I'm Jaymes... and I'm jews-oops."
Best Runway(s): Whilst her Gaga bedhead was amusing, it has to be her White Party look.
Best Moment(s): I actually don't get what was so funny and/or bad about her forward rolls in the cheerleading - it wasn't really that much worse than anyone else's efforts :unsure: - but that rolling meme was beautiful.

gac35E2EiPY

[RileyH]

Jaymes :lovedup:

[MB.]

Literally only the funnier of the two season 9 comedy queens by default

[Shaun]

Forgot there was even another one tbh

[Shaun]

Right then, into the top 100.

https://media3.giphy.com/media/9D50APaW1CNe2VAwEu/giphy.gif
100th Place: Vanessa Vanjie Mateo (Season 10) - finished 14th

Where to start? The most iconic exit-line of all time (step aside Thorgy's "witty catchphrase, you know what I mean?" and Ginger's "THEY GOT ME, GAL" :() came from the most recent season's first eliminee. I've followed the fanbase and such since season five now and I think it's safe to say it's been the biggest, most wide-reaching meme of all time. And good, because I knew from the second I saw her Meet the Queens video that she would be a personality perfect for reality TV.

Sadly, we only got one episode, and that's because she glued a bunch of barbie dolls to her swimsuit and drowned in flowers.

Still... at least we've got another season of her to come.

Memorable quote(s): "I'm Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, get these cookies...baby".
Best Runway(s): n/a :(
Best Moment(s): Do we need to clarify? But also: Kim Chi dancing with her body cage in the mini-challenge <3

[Shaun]

Since posting that, my Miss Vanjie t-shirt arrived in the post :love: I'm not sure I'll be getting any imminent merch, however, from...

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/1/1a/Rebecca_out_of_Drag.gif/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/223?cb=20160506233035
99th Place: Rebecca Glasscock (Season 1) - finished 3rd

The original Drag Race trade that made Milk look like a bloodhound with Downs, Becky with the Glasscock is an easy go-to target for Drag Race fans. Whether that's because she entered the workroom in jeans, because she rose to the top of the season for mystifying reasons that got many others vexed, or because she's been relatively incognito since the season aired, I don't know.

Many, of course, cite her two lipsyncs as the reason why they hate(d) her: did she win against Jade? Probably not. Did she win against Shannel? I personally would argue yes. Massive arm claps and shaking your ass does not a Mary Mary make.

W9p2icqX8xY

That Jade lipsync though is pretty unforgiveable and mystifying. Rebecca became deeply unpopular with several of the other queens; notably Jade and Shannel. I would strongly recommend you watch the reunion episode of season one - if not just for Tammie's ICONIC clapbacks at RuPaul herself, but because there's a ton of Shannel admonishing poor Becky :love: and Jade hugs it out with her, which is nice.

Memorable quote(s): "If I am so horrible and such a bitch, why would I give you my brand new green contacts?" Indeed.
Best Runway(s): Her top 3 look is gorgeous, but I'd go for her Miss Absolut Lemon look.
Best Moment(s): Walking off set and announcing "I'm done" during the HIV campaign challenge despite Ru's protestations <3

[Shaun]

https://medias.intomore.com/original/6/c/1/6c1564a13f6407554f8a2ffe6437c98ca3187d06.gif
98th Place: Yuhua Hamasaki (Season 10) - finished 12th

The term "rapid downfall" applies best to Yuhua's tenure on the show, and this is from a season where the winner of the first challenge went home fifth. Yuhua's high placings in both the Drag on a Dime, and Pharmarusical challenges seemed to count for nothing when she was sent packing by Mayhem on episode three.

Going into this season, Yuhua was a fan favourite amongst all those who're dying for an Asian queen to finally snatch the crown after close runs with Manila, Kim Chi and Jujubee (okay, perhaps not so close with the latter). Her quick wit in the premiere when meeting the queens seemed to pin her as a contender to go all the way, but sadly, her hot and flexible body didn't allow her to succeed in all different positions.

In fact, aside from bombing the Dating App task and spending an unhealthy length of time just putting dots on her face to make herself look ugly (poor Dusty?), I really struggle to remember Yuhua this season. She had a slight altercation with her team in that challenge, snapping at Aquaria and Monet for telling her to hurry up, but otherwise she is perhaps best remembered for Michelle trying to make Ankh Ankh happen.

Memorable quote(s): Asia: "Eureka, you are not versatile."
Eureka: "I could surprise you, bitch!"
Yuhua: "How about break your knee again?"
Best Runway(s): Her drag on a dime 'caution tape' look.
Best Moment(s): Her "look sad and then smile" did make me laugh during the RuPaul chocolate bar mini-challenge.

[Headie]

I'd love to see Yuhua return for a future season tbh, I really enjoyed her

[ethanjames]

i acc really liked yuha

[Tom4784]

Yeah, I think she's All Stars material tbh. I think she was just overwhelmed by the experience the first time around but I think she'd bring it if she had another shot.

[MB.]

Her Instagram Live that plays over the credits of the latest RuCap <3

[Shaun]

Terribly sorry, I've been away without my laptop for a while. 97 coming shortly...

[Shaun]

https://zippy.gfycat.com/BadTerribleBengaltiger.gif
97th Place: Pearl (Season 7) - finished 3rd (officially "runner up" with Ginger but, I mean...)

I keep trying to convince myself that I'm not at all a hater and that all of my rankings and reasonings in this rankdown thus far have been largely justified but I suppose I have my biggest struggle with my conscience when it comes to "where do I put Pearl?"

Season seven had a very bad reputation despite giving us some of the show's strongest ever and most successful queens (Trixie, Katya, Kennedy, Ginger, Violet) let alone JASMINE MASTERS, and I definitely got wrapped in my "THIS SEASON SUCKS :mad:" bubble at the time. Since then, with repeated rewatches, the hate has fizzled... but my confusion at Pearl's trajectory on the show has not.

I know it's terribly reductive to say that Pearl only made the top three because the judges thought the fans would love her because #trade... but seriously, can anyone pinpoint a challenge she excelled at? Because off the top of my head...
- She TANKED the Shakesqueer challenge and didn't even land in the bottom two. "Cheerleader tryouts are happening today". What the ****? I can only imagine Kennedy got put with Jasmine because Jasmine's squat-thrusts to "I Was Gonna Cancel" would've KILLED Pearl.
- She was the dirt-worst dancer in the "half man/half woman" challenge that Trixie was sent home again for, but they decided to judge them as pairs; Pearl was thus saved by Kennedy's chops.
- SHE WORE A ****ING BLANKET FOR THE HELLO KITTY BALL AND FINISHED TOP TWO? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WITH A BLAND MADONNA SIDEKICK? I thought I'd buried this anger but I guess not.

There was, however, the make-over conjoined twins challenge to bring back Trixie... and really, who do you think won that for them, with the idea to make one of the twins a busted, braces-wearing geek? :think: Pearl's other win came for an admittedly good DESPYS Awards presentation with Max; her impression of Ginger particularly stood out.

I remember posting on here that I genuinely didn't get the fuss about Trixie Mattel (because she was painfully unfunny on the show. Both times :ninja2:) and I am actually one of the very few who actually thought Pearl won that lipsync... but of course it's probably the most contentious of all time (even though I would venture that "Peppermint beats Trinity Taylor" was FAR more questionable...) The fact that Pearl would go on to survive one more lipsync - a true contender for the worst of all time, against Miss Fame to Demi Lovato's "Really Don't Care" - was further bewildering. Of course, though, Pearl's cardinal sin was making the top three over Kennedy Mother****ing Davenport, and that is a case of the show buckling to the twatty fans' demands that I will never forgive.

Production riggor morris was something I'd never really considered until S7/AS2, and the constructed nature of her talking heads (most notably: someone "throwing a glass of water at Pearl to wake her up! lol!") was particularly absurd, too, and stank to high heaven of trying to give her an arc that nobody was interested in.

As I said - I'm being slightly unfair on Pearl here because her Snatch Game (as Big Ang, RIP) was pretty bloody good actually, and I do get the impression she's not as terminally dull as the edit suggests... but there were so, so many better queens than Pearl on this season that it's only fair I take it out on her by putting her below Sasha Belle.

Memorable quote(s): "Is there something on my face?"
Best Runway(s): 100% the Jetset Eleganza challenge. She has a lot of good ones but this was brilliant. (https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ed/a3/01/eda30132fbd4ba2555a703e329538ba8.png) I would understand if you made a case for the bearded queens look, though.
Best Moment(s): Sasha Belle saying she should go home on the first challenge <3

[Smithy]

Drag

Her

!

[ethanjames]

yes cant stand pearl

[Saph]

"Did I read? Absolutely. Did I talk ****? Absolutely."

this line is so iconic its stuck with me since I first heard her say it back in 2011

[Black Dagger]

Enjoyed Big Ang. One of my favourite snatch performances but she she trash.

[Shaun]

Been away all week again, sorry!*

https://78.media.tumblr.com/eaeb9cd5dfc457225556614780f3337c/tumblr_inline_nl0ikmjMNw1qddzt0.gif
96th Place: Sasha Belle (Season 7) - finished 13th

Just as a run-on from the previous ranking, may I add how pissed off I was by Pearl's toxic narcissism? Calling Sasha "John Goodman in a wig" after episode one was just ridiculously childish and ugh I'm glad I've thrown her out early now. BORING COW.

Sadly, Sasha wasn't much more exciting. One of the tropes of reality TV is casting someone who professes liberally about how they've "cracked the code" and know what it takes to win, only for the cards to fall drastically against them. Sasha is the immediate example of this, to me: she came in as a self-proclaimed superfan but then wore a visible black bra in a sewing challenge to look naked :think:

Remarkably, Sasha avoided the bottom two that first week because Kandy Ho had resurrected the spirit of Willam on her face - but there was no saving her in episodde two.... even though the only thing she really did wrong was struggle to take off a hairclip during that Glamazonian Airways challenge. Were it not for one of the weirdest and ill-fitting runway choices of all time, she could just as easily have escaped scrutiny here again.

You might be asking how she's lasted so long in this rankdown, and NO, the answer isn't: because he looks like this out of drag, now (https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DEKeGe6V0AAos-v.jpg). The answer is this very small, split second moment of the conjoined-twins challenge lipsync. In an episode where Ginger audibly expressed her discontent with being paired up with Sasha, despite all of Sasha's adoration towards her </3 there came one brief, iconic lipsync moment that saved Ginger's disastrous titties from herself.

VTAr9RHlpzY
Said moment is at 1:20 here. That pussy pounding the floor whilst Ginger cuddles her pillow <3 ugh. A lipsync gem.

Memorable quote(s): "How can you say I was basic? I wore a...lobster dress :("
Best Runway(s): I guess it'd have to be the Lobster Dress.
Best Moment(s): Writing "Ginger for the win!" after she was eliminated <3 a queen with taste

*not really remotely sorry, since I owe you nobodies nothing

[RileyH]

Pearl is a legend and should NOT be below Sasha ****ing Belle

[Saph]

not sasha belle :joker: isnt she trying to be a male model now

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/7/71/Gia10.gif/revision/latest?cb=20160208184011
95th Place: Gia Gunn (Season 6) - finished 9th

There's going to be a run now of queens whose low placements are, perhaps rightly, going to upset many of you - but when compiling this I guess I prioritised likeable people and underdogs over queens that were overbearing and extremely nasty on the show. Gia Gunn is absolutely one of the latter, and her prejudices towards Milk and Darienne Lake left an extremely sour taste in my mouth.

I know for a fact that she's matured and enlightened herself since season 6 and is now a far more tolerant/open person and has a good rapport with a bunch of established queens, but...

Until we see her on AllStars 4, I don't have much evidence to prove that!

Gia's short stay on the show was summarised by playing second fiddle to Hurricane Laganja, calling themselves Team Too Much. Together they dominated the drama of the season, and Gia's talking heads varied between genuinely hilarious and skin-crawlingly awkward and lacking in self-awareness. The original Kimora Blac, Gia fumbled some not-all-that-obscure references ("What's a Tony?", "What's a DeLorean?") and could've settled nicely into the loveable dumb girl role if:

a) Joslyn Fox wasn't also in the cast
b) She wasn't so unpleasant.

Her coming for Milk might not look so bad now that Milk's shown her true colours in Allstars 3, but there was just this really acidic way with which Gia attacked her. Her exit, turning to the other queens and saying "You guys are all still dudes", and then the credits interview where she said "I'm upset that there's other crossdressers still in there that came to a drag show dressed as boys" was just... not good. At all. The show has put up with a ton of queens complaining about how to drag correctly and putting themselves in boxes that leave absolutely no room for creativity, but to my knowledge, Gia was the absolute worst for this and was in desperate need of someone to smack her and open her eyes. Thankfully, Joslyn did this in Untucked, calling her ignorant.

All of this aside, I am fully prepared to embrace Gia as an Allstar if she continues with her knack for a good soundbite and ditches the superficial bitchiness.

Memorable quote(s): "This is the Olympics of drag, honey, and ****'s getting gaggy."
"I don't jump guns, I am the boom boom gun, honey."
"I'm feeling my oats! Let me feel my oats!"
"Feeling like pussy, feeling like **** x2"
"How is she, though?"
Best Runway(s): I didn't actually love any of them but this was probably the best one: http://i.imgur.com/k9yhTHv.png
Best Moment(s): "I didn't quite cough like a man, but ok."

[Headie]

Lol I love Gia, I found her hilarious <3

[Shaun]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ba/6b/df/ba6bdff4eaac4ce6862c6f0177a93447.jpg
94th Place: Milan (Season 4) - finished 9th

I feel like when a queen ends her introduction on the premiere of a new season with "...and you don't want it from her!" you're probably setting yourself up to prove a point.

Milan entered with the token broadway campy music accompanying her, and sure enough ran right off the bat with a bunch of quips about how she couldn't be pigeon-holed, and her talents and inspirations were sooooo far-reaching and different. Her pretense got her wrapped up in all sorts of problems: despite being one of the few season four girls with acting experience, she bombed at the Tuckahoe sitcom challenge and had to send Madame LaQueer home. Despite being from the political, woke side of New York drag, she failed to resonate with the message of Stonewall during the Hope Floats challenge and ended up being sent packing by Jiggly. And despite her supposed savvy intellect, she tried dressing up as Whitney Houston to advertise a CD by...RuPaul.

I suppose - whilst not all that bad and actually quite good TV - my biggest gripe with Milan is that she tried too damn hard to be extra and steal scenes. Her interactions on Untucked were particularly embarrassing and often resulted in her having her ass handed to her: most notably by Willam in this iconic moment:

L1gZ8E-JUgM

"Is the carpet comfortable?" ugh. Queen.

She seems to have disappeared from the drag race circuit despite being one of the more memorable names from a big, fan favourite season... and having looked at her Facebook there were some weird pretentious ramblings a few years ago about being unappreciated and disrespected, that it's all just... vague and tiring. So that's why Milan drops out early.

Memorable quote(s): "Coloured girl: why your base look like chalk?"
Best Runway(s): Her only bad one, really, was her Hope Floats one. I would personally argue that [url=http://i.imgur.com/vRME2tQ.png]this was one of the absolute best RuPocalypse runways and should 100% have been in the top 3. But no, Lashauwn shoved a globe on her head and Princess wore something too clean so they deserved the top placings... despite still being read by Michelle. I guess. Phi Phi, Milan, Sharon = the correct top 3 that week :idc: IJS.
Best Moment(s): She sent home Kenya Michaels, so thank you? In fact that Milan/Kenya lipsync is super underrated. Both killed it.

[MB.]

"Coloured girl: why your base look like chalk?"

:love:

Milan was... born this way... she was born-she was born this way!

[Saph]

Milan was probably one of the worst queens ever.. the way she used to pull her wig off every lip sync

https://78.media.tumblr.com/71de373155e368aa9da63fb58efae56c/tumblr_inline_n0ecdqVxbY1r9orj4.png

[ethanjames]

I loved gia smh

[Shaun]

https://media2.giphy.com/media/l46CAwfOjOtChQS52/giphy.gif
93rd Place: Naysha Lopez (Season 8) - finished 9th

Naysha is one of many, many queens that I have a strong recollection of their elimination being unjust. Naysha, of course, encountered two - but one of them was fair enough. The first one, obviously.

That RECTANGLE GIRLS OF THE WORLD... challenge was a mess from start to finish: Bob the Drag Queen slagged off Lorde and fought with Lucian Piane (the final tipping point into his drug-addled Nazism?), a team won for calling each other kinds of mustard, and none of them were Thorgy, and the bloke from Blondie (correctly) read a queen for wearing the same shoes during the challenge and runway. I did actually love this episode because it redeemed Robbie Turner fully, and had a brilliant runway (plus 2/3 of the teams did good) but I can't wrap my head around the justification for Naysha leaving for it.

Her runway, in particular, that episode is criminally underrated and one of the - if not THE - best bodysuits ever seen on the show, and the lipsync itself seemed to act as a counterpoint to Ru's decision to send Sonique home over Morgan McMichaels back in season two; back then a queen just did flips and cartwheels and didn't concentrate much on the actual lipsync, and got sent home for it. This time she survived :idc: Perhaps if Naysha's wig hadn't fallen off, she could've survived.... but one would imagine she was primarily eliminated because she didn't offer as much drama as Derrick and Chi Chi.

The one episode where Naysha was safe, she served up a chilling premonition of Bebe Zahara Benet's Drag Up Your Life verse in the RuCo's Empire challenge, and otherwise did a pretty good job of proving herself to be likeable and polished. Indeed, her departure (the 2nd one) saw her leaving two items of clothing for Chi Chi to use, which is one of those rare genuine good-gestures that the show thrives off of. Naysha's a sweetheart and I'm a big fan of hers, but I couldn't justify her finishing much higher based on the show's performance.

Memorable quote(s): Kim Chi: "What about you, Naysha? What's your type?" Naysha: "Men."
Best Runway(s): 100% her Neon Runway, but her Roller-Girl was gorgeous, too.
Best Moment(s):
https://media.tenor.com/images/45f4504a7f089c7312e758f1afbcb143/tenor.gifhttps://media.tenor.com/images/7cea853ce42fc816984e448d7b207392/tenor.gif

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/Cozc.gif
92nd Place: Kelly Mantle (Season 6) - finished joint 13th

I already regret placing her higher than Naysha/Gia to be honest but the interviews and paraphernalia that I've seen of Kelly off-show just about edged her ahead whenever it was that I arbitrarily decided the order of this rankdown.

Kelly entered season 6 as some fans' tip to win, and her talking heads/pre-season interviews, where she threw shade at friend and acting colleague Willam, certainly helped to create an image of Kelly Mantle being a frontrunner... but sadly, show production antics meant that she was placed under a closer microscope than any other set of first-episode queens. Splitting the 14 into two groups of seven meant that Season 6 is the only season where we technically have two queens that finished joint-last (although I suppose season 8 does, too, thanks to Naysha's return) - and it also meant that "nobody could fade into the background". To me, that just sounds like "we want to edit out the boring ones ASAP" and Kelly didn't quite have the OTT energy that her episode's cohorts Gia, Laganja, Vivacious and Adore did (despite Kelly putting together a dress that was more constructed than all of theirs :idc:)

The only crime Kelly made was bringing that horrific red wig she decided to pair with her Downton Abbey bacon dress. Truly a Party City nightmare. Otherwise, she was pretty much an underwhelming delight; perhaps best explained by this clip:

JxkHmnCG774

Off the show she made history by becoming the first ever actor to be considered by the Oscars for both "actor" and "actress" categories in 2014's "Confessions of a Womanizer" (which also starred Gary Busey and the Bella twins from WWE so... make your own minds up as to how likely that nomination would've been).

Memorable quote(s): "I'm an actor, but I'm not going to go around reciting my IMDB page like some people."
Best Runway(s): n/a
Best Moment(s): Offering to school Magnolia Crawford at the reunion.

[ethanjames]

love HER

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/3oEjI1Fm1IvHMZkbi8/giphy.gif
91st Place: Naomi Smalls (Season 8) - finished 3rd

She's a pair of legs and not much else. I will be forever bitter that she stole Chi Chi's final spot for no damn reason, I will be forever bitter that she sent Acid Betty home by rolling around on the stage doing the bare minimum, and I will forever be bitter that she is one of the fan favourites for....no reason.

OK so let's get her good points out of the way: she won the Wizard of Oz makeover challenge and rightly so, but can you remember her competition? Literally everyone else performed poorly that challenge bar Thorgy (who by then, the judges had it on for) and Kim (who ruined it with some weird "trading of the brooms" choreo). Outside of that ONE win, I actually enjoyed her performance in the Shady Politics challenge and she did a great job of reading Kim, however ruined it again by literally wearing the same outfit a queen has worn before (Raven's sort-of upside down cone thing).

She also absolutely destroyed Derrick Barry in the workroom:

4sS_HhJ7ayU

However I guess the main reason I'm ejecting her this early - aside from the fact she was really one-note and has a very shallow and uninteresting approach to modeling and fashion - was her tweet she made in response to the attack on the MEN arena last year with the Ariana Grande concert.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DAej-f6W0AADRBT.jpg

Sorry... she could be amazing on a future Allstars but I just can't look past how dumb and, sheerly vapid and assholey that was. It's up there with Paris Hilton's "stop being poor" t-shirt, to me. So yeah, **** off Naomi.

Also: the MUG webseries was boring af.

Memorable quote(s): "And Derrick has thin... hair. :o"
Best Runway(s): 100% her Book Ball eleganza look.
Best Moment(s): Her family (and mom in particular) were adorable.

[Captain.Remy]

Naomi vs Derrick really is memorable thanks to Bob acting like a fool in the background, otherwise it would have been lame. But yeah, Naomi crucified Derrick.

[Shaun]

https://media1.tenor.com/images/768c0a0312f26178447059d90088b049/tenor.gif?itemid=8958792
90th Place: Farrah Moan (Season 9) - finished 8th

Another placing I feel kinda bad about is Farrah, but at the same time I really didn't care for her on season 9 so it feels...right. Whilst season eight had a Britney lookalike going too damn far whilst doing nothing of note, season nine had the Xtina one - and I think introducing Farrah to her celeb counterpart in an unseen Season 10 moment is perhaps the first time I've actually felt something whilst Farrah was on screen.

That's probably a bit harsh. She was pretty messy and lowkey iconic during the S9 Reunion with her Valentina drama, and she managed to get in a couple of jokes that redeemed her disastrous Roast appearance, but otherwise...? Her best challenge performance was probably the 9021Ho performance, and even then she fluffed her lines a few times.

I think every season there's just a pretty girl who's rather inconsequential, and no matter how they tried to make Farrah cute by telling us how her whining was sweet (IT WAS JUST ANNOYING, THANKS), I was left waiting for her to go home.

In Farrah's defence, she is exceptionally beautiful and polished and must have some talent to be in Vegas, but we just didn't get much of a taste for it in S9.

Memorable quote(s): "I find it hilarious that Michelle Visage judges a talent competition. I don't know about you but don't you actually have to have talent, to do that? And I'm pretty sure having one song in the 90s that no one even remembers doesn't qualify you to be a judge on such a big TV show. Good thing she's been sucking RuPaul's dick for so long." mighta been a roast but points were made
Best Runway(s): Her naughty nighties (https://68.media.tumblr.com/b55867321ab0cb86181e35bea4aff883/tumblr_oof4tyz65v1qlvwnco1_500.gif) for sure, although the White Party (https://78.media.tumblr.com/e2d90bfd0192bdf61bd58bdc765cde1d/tumblr_oo5h03NDHw1qac1soo1_400.gif) comes close.
Best Moment(s): Obviously the guttural noise she made when Eureka was sent home for being "too crippled" (RuPaul's words, obvi)

[RileyH]

WHAT

[RileyH]

Farrah deserves better

[Black Dagger]

She doesn't.

[Tom4784]

I live for Kelly's Vivacious impression.

I just don't care for Naomi.

I have a soft spot for Farrah tbh, she was terrible on the show admittedly but I thought she was likable.

[Headie]

"Lets get this roast a cookin'! :)" always makes me scream, like she really thought she was gonna have everyone on the floor dying after that one opening line :joker:

Farrah dragging that homophobic geordie slag in a kebab shop is about the only good thing she's done tho <3

[Shaun]

She is lovely yeah, and I do like her, but she sucked on S9 and should've gone home sooner (she did worse than Kimora for the Princess challenge, I think, and would've been slain by Aja in the Holding Out for a Hero lipsync)

[ethanjames]

farrah way too low

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/IQnG9tF8uUQKI/giphy.gif
89th Place: Sahara Davenport (Season 2) - finished 7th

It's hard placing Sahara anywhere in this list given her passing. Season two was a genuine gem of reality television and whilst Sahara wasn't as dramatic a part of it, she was truly a radiant and impassioned performer and gave her all to the three lipsyncs she was involved with. I guess she's also the first ever queen to give us a jump split on the show, and well, that's a legacy that carries on.

As I've said, she wasn't quite involved with all the fights that season (Raven vs. Tati, Morgan vs. Mystique, everyone vs. Tyra) and so it seemed inevitable that she would be sent home sooner or later for not delivering on the "good TV" front, but Sahara managed to win a challenge (the poledancing / Cherry Pie! one) and left the season with a pretty strong sisterhood. If Miss Congeniality actually meant something, she would've won.

Sahara is also remembered for being the ex-partner of Manila Luzon, and of course sharing a house dynasty with Kennedy. The Davenports - just by these two showings - are a name to be reckoned with and they deliver some of the best dancers the show's ever seen.

Memorable quote(s):

De8ahJyPkTQ
Watch from 19:35 :(

Best Runway(s): Hard finding pics but this one (https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/d/d5/Sahara_star.png/revision/latest?cb=20170930154351)
Best Moment(s): The little scream of "YAY!" before she realised she'd sent her friend Shangela home <3

[Smithy]

Farrah was done dirty I'm sure there's worse than her still to come :nono:

Sahara was always a bit invisible for me so.. :shrug: on her placing

[Shaun]

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/logosrupaulsdragrace/images/0/0b/Tumblr_mpbox62HBh1s49x9io1_500.gif/revision/latest?cb=20160424141657
88th Place: Jade Jolie (Season 5) - finished 8th

As "meh" as her impersonation of Taylor Swift during the S5 Snatch Game was, in a way it was a perfect choice for Jade Jolie: because despite a heavy "holier than thou" sugary, innocent exterior, there is a rotted nasty beast in Taylor Swift and I think Jade went extra method in capturing that throughout season 5.

Now, I don't hate Jade, and actually think she was great reality TV and contributed a hell of a lot of drama that wasn't just the same old "Alyssa vs. Coco" tedium that season 5 would later become. But she is definitely on the meaner side of the Drag Race spectrum and would not let miss Alyssa Edwards live :( she definitely chose the wrong ally in Coco.

Jade's time on the show was pretty lacklustre: she gave okay performances in Snatch Game and the ballet, but never came close to shining and was pretty obviously a filler queen. Then, if she lasted longer, perhaps the knowledge that she has starred in gay porn themed around Nazis would be a little more common. Which we don't want, really, and is why I won't mention it now.

She read the hell out of Serena though, and for that, I love her.

Memorable quote(s): "I am happy with what I got from the dumpster :)"
"Serena said she went to art school. She might want her money back."
"Girl you ain't that pretty. Covergirl not coverboy, baby."
"Girl if I was gonna judge anyone, I'd judge you on that body where the shoulders should match them hips, but they don't, so... girl you had rolls, all over the back! It was disgusting!"
Best Runway(s): Definitely her ringleader thing that I've used in the GIF above.
Best Moment(s): I still get life whenever she does these weird knee-kicks and flicks during the lipsync vs. Coco, with her random af strands of hair flailing around her body :love:
Alternatively, failing to notice the giant water tank behind her in the week 1 photoshoot :love:

[Smithy]

the knowledge that she has starred in gay porn themed around Nazis would be a little more common

Omdg :laugh3:

[Braden]

Milk still in the running :love:

[Shaun]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/08/52/95/085295368ed536b52b399709c3a933f9.gif
87th Place: Laila McQueen (Season 8) - finished joint-last

I guess it doesn't make a huge amount of sense to put this big a gap in my rankings between Dax and Laila when they both pretty much ****ed up the "I Will Survive" lipsync equally, but hey... I guess I like Laila.

Laila's pretty popular among the other queens and immediately strikes me as probably the most polished "first eliminee" queen - Vanjie included. It certainly seems inevitable that she'll be asked back to compete in a future series, whether that's Allstars or something else, because she managed to accrue a large number of fans for... very little performance.

OK so a huge part of my defence of Laila is that she 100%, no doubt in my mind did not deserve to be in the bottom two in the first episode. Her take on the Rupocalypse runway might not have been a complete head-to-toe look, but it was far more creative and well-constructed than Naomi's cheap gold dress and ugly-ass boat, Robbie's poodle monstrosity, and I would argue even Cynthia's Detox knock-off and Derrick's mistletoe pubes. There's still a strong chance she'd have been edited out in episode two anyway for failing to be a huge personality, but she didn't deserve to be a queen who lipsynced in every episode she featured in.

Still: that first one to 'Applause' was a pretty stellar one, so there's that at least. And I think across all seasons, Laila is comfortably the queen I am most attracted to out of drag. So well done Laila! :clap2:

Memorable quote(s): "Alright ladies, let's turn up the juice and see what shakes loose..." - I still have no idea what this means.
Best Runway(s): She only had two. It wasn't the second one.
Best Moment(s): Cynthia picking her for her team, calling her "Lyla" :love:

[Headie]

I find Laila so overrated, I wasn't even that keen on her Week 1 lip sync either :shrug:

[Shaun]

Sorry for all of the work getting in the way of this lately...

https://media.giphy.com/media/Fw1dLk8o3DUSk/giphy.gif

http://logoonline.mtvnimages.com/uri/mgid:file:http:shared:s3.amazonaws.com/articles.newnownext.com-production/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/20-Dusty-1523635389-1523635391.gif
86th Place: Dusty Ray Bottoms (Season 10) - finished 11th

My pre-season favourite based almost entirely on what he looked like out of drag, Dusty's presence in Season 10 was pretty much unnoticeable. Judging the queens from the later seasons seems quite hard and harsh to do now because it's pretty rare for a queen to deliver a performance in a challenge that is anywhere near as bad as, say, Milan's Tuckahoe acting, Milan's Diana Ross, or even Milan's Glamazon advert*. Pretty much all of the queens who get eliminated in the first half of the season now are capable of delivering at least one good performance; whereas back in season 5 and earlier, these slots were reserved for filler like Honey Mahogany, India Ferrah or Nicole Paige Brooks.

Dusty certainly had two highlights that I can recall: her performance in the Dating App challenge was the best of a pretty horrible team (thanks a LOT, Monique, for landing Our Mayhem in the bottom two with piss-poor management!), and the episode before that saw her turn what could've been a winning performance in the PharmaRusical - had she been on the winning team. Because you cannot argue that the Vixen did a better job in that, or indeed her best drag, than Dusty :idc:

Unfortunately once Dusty had spilled her devastating personal story of how she'd been forced into conversion therapy, she was inevitably left on the pile of "queens we don't know what to do with because they aren't fighting" and ended up tanking the global warming Ball on 2/3 looks. Bless her cotton socks for thinking that a glow-up wig would be visible for her Miami Summer look though :love:

As I said, I really liked Dusty and she was a sweetheart, but she was totally not giving C-U-N-T on season 10, so has to go.

Memorable quote(s): Well she tried to make "#NEVERLAVDYAH happen so let's go with that
Best Runway(s): Definitely her 'Best Drag' runway
Best Moment(s): Preparing a monologue read for every single queen in the reunion when they were only asked to give two each :love:

*I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today and chose a random queen to target

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/3ohzdTzCNOOqXwdGYo/giphy.gif
85th Place: Jade (Season 1) - finished 6th

There isn't quite a lot I remember about Jade, but I do still hold the strong sense that: if ever a drag queen was robbed on this show, it was Jade. Jade might not have stole the show in her first three episodes but the level of polish and preparation far surpassed the likes of Rebecca Glasscock - the queen who would send her home. And the GIF above is taken from episode four; the episode she was eliminated on. I'm still not sure how she even winded up in the bottom two: her ad campaign was a pretty sick look and she certainly didn't fluff her lines as much as Shannel or Bebe.

Her most controversial moment came when she lipsynced against Rebecca, a video I've already shared in my Glasscock writeup :love: but that was truly the most clear-cut robbery in lipsync history. Even Trixie/Pearl, I at least enjoyed Pearl's ANGRY-FLAILING :mad: take on 'Dreaming' a little more than Trixie's forgettable cuteness. This was a straight-up riggery and Jade was justifiably pissed off at the reunion. Another Drag Race classic, that episode :love: and not just for Tammie coming for Ru.

Jade recently popped up at the S10 finale as "only season 1 girl who actually looked excited to perform" and delivered the best medley performance along with Monique Heart:
https://i.redd.it/5ei1thnscw611.gif
queen of noticing Monique's earring falling off <33333

Otherwise sadly all I remember about Jade is her being interviewed on national news media in response to the Pulse tragedy - something she lost her cousin in - but I am pretty firm in my belief that I'd be more than happy to see more of Jade should Allstars ever come calling :love:

Oh, also: obvious Jade/Trade pun here: http://i.imgur.com/G7b8HTr.jpg

Memorable quote(s): "Merkel said in her statement: Ahmaja...ja... can do better. :)"
Best Runway(s): Dodgy tuck aside: https://media.giphy.com/media/133aZyrDIBUhCU/giphy.gif
Best Moment(s): Thinking that putting blackface on was the requirement of the "channel your inner Oprah" task <3

[RileyH]

Jade :lovedup: an underrated robbed legend

[Tom4784]

I can't really remember her tbh.

[Shaun]

https://78.media.tumblr.com/42e31fe87d1c67caa60fdbf52e6cbe4d/tumblr_nn4udjXHSu1t9hyiyo1_500.gif
84th Place: Laganja Estranja (Season 6) - finished 8th

If you'd asked me to do this list just after season six ended, I would probably have jumped straight to put Laganja in the bottom five. With hindsight, of course season six is hands down the best that has ever aired, so the idea of a queen from it being at the rock bottom is a little farfetched, but I cannot stress just how tiresome and draining I felt watching Laganja at the time. There has not been, and hopefully never will be a queen who was/is more dramatic, insecure, false and intense - and the Untucked episodes further amplified Laganja's problems and probably made her the first queen I actually hated (but then that's because S6 is the first I watched live). Whilst it was fun to root against her, and see queens like Adore, Bianca and Joslyn suss her to be full of it, it has to be said that it was deeply uncomfortable and borderline exploitative to watch her neuroses play out so violently publicly.

Time has passed though, and the high has mellowed. Though the reunion proved that she would take some time before dropping the affectations and the silly voice and the 100% ON TONIGHT, DARLING attitude, she has definitely improved and shown herself not quite to be the paranoid asshole she was on her season... but at the same time she didn't really do well at any of the challenges enough for me to justify placing her any higher.

She may be one of the most iconic queens the show has shone a light on, but they're mostly for all the wrong reasons MAWMA.

Memorable quote(s): "I FEEL VERY ATTACKED."
"I can't specifically point out what you said, but I know that whatever you said, it did hurt me."
"I don't know why I expected anything different, it's just like the human race - we all are just... ****ing evil."
"Can y'all get my ****ing nail that fell off? 'Cause I'm such a disaster. SEND ME ****IN' HOME, GOD."
Best Runway(s): idk what the theme was but that one where she's in a lace peach gown, and has a butterfly fascinator?[/url]
Best Moment(s): Obviously her workroom entrance is the greatest of all time.

[Shaun]

https://i.redd.it/dvhqt9g2bsyy.gif
83rd Place: Vivacious (Season 6) - finished 12th

It still hurts that Vivacious went home so early on season 6, but then every time I rewatch that horror movie challenge I can't help but feel frustration and, ultimately, reluctant acceptance of her sashay. Because for every terrible line of delivery, awkward pause, and look of complete confusion that she showed in that episode, she had a pocketful of charisma being showcased elsewhere.

I still don't really understand why her Game of Thrones look earned her the bottom two when she delivered the best runway walk (it saved Mystique back in season two, so...?) and Laganja looked like the Tin Man stuck in some black cobwebs / Adore looked like a diabetic child... but hey, whatever. Totally over it.

Vivacious packed a lot of memorable lines and moments (Ornacia, LIZA MINELLI LIES, the spike suit) into such a brief time that she will always have my heart, but I just couldn't place her any higher when all she could really do was walk crooked in an entertaining way.

Memorable quote(s): "Mother... has arrived."
Best Runway(s): I mean it's obviously this majestic phenomenon. (https://media.giphy.com/media/l0MYFuRKyTJpTBy6s/giphy.gif)
Best Moment(s):
https://i.gifer.com/YGjZ.gif

[Tom4784]

I remember her mostly for that video on Reddit of her wielding a fan at an arsehole with enough fury and sass to bring forth Armeggedon. An underrated queen although it's purely her fault for messing up that challenge so bad.

[Joe.]

When is this being continued?

[RileyH]

Vivacious above Laganja

https://78.media.tumblr.com/42e31fe87d1c67caa60fdbf52e6cbe4d/tumblr_nn4udjXHSu1t9hyiyo1_500.gif

[Daniel-X]

Reboot this Shaun! I loved reading it and it was actually a proper detailed ranking!

[Shaun]

OK! Let's get this roast a-cooking!

https://media.giphy.com/media/xTiTnLZ2dqfYWY9ybm/giphy.gif
82nd Place: Madame LaQueer (Season 4) - finished 10th

SEVERELY underrated, and treated as something of a joke from season four (notably by her fellow competitors at the time, like Kenya Michaels, Willam and Sharon Needles), Madame LaQueer actually holds a record for being the earliest queen to sashay away with a challenge win in her purse. I say this as if it's a fact I've researched, but to my knowledge... she won episode 2, went home on episode 4. Morgan McMichaels, Lineysha Sparx and Mayhem Miller went home episode 5. Yup, just checked. My drag race intuitions were correct.

As mentioned: Madame's size saw her receive a lot of attention and jibes from the rest of the girls, and her language barrier didn't really help - especially not when adopting a fancy European accent in an acting challenge. Her fears over her physical abilities were triumphantly overcome in a Divas of Wrestling challenge, creating Meatball a monster sidekick character to Chad Michaels' villain. She also snatched a mini-challenge win with Willam for their mugshots, although one would argue this was mostly Willam's idea (with the blue dye packs from the 'money they'd robbed').

I'm a little rusty at writing these things again but I am firm in my belief that Madame LaQueer is one of many queens who would be a welcome returnee at some point in Drag Race future, as her makeup and stage presence are pretty strong enough, and she has the potential to surprise us. Unfortunately, she's stuck with not only the older-season staple of "let's make fun of the hispanic queen" but also the status of 'pointer sister', and was destroyed by Milan in a lipsync.

Memorable quote(s): "My ankle went click"
Best Runway(s): Probably the one in the GIF. Her Gold/Silver was gross, her red-carpet was cute, and her Rupocalypse was serviceable.
Best Moment(s): Obviously the inability to imitate Lucille Ball's EWWW is her standout highlight.

[Shaun]

https://media1.tenor.com/images/34e5c068d6cb4d7b148d87ca0cce4167/tenor.gif?itemid=11567392
81st Place: The Vixen (Season 10) - finished 7th

I think enough time has passed now to look back on the Vixen's tenure on Season 10 relatively objectively (probably because it feels like there has been 5 seasons since Aquaria won), so let's tackle the season's angriest queen.

I first became aware of the Vixen when she popped up in the music video (and indeed lyrics) of Shea Coulee's pretty good 'Cocky', and whilst she didn't really steal the show, she was someone many tipped to snatch the crown Shea deserved. As the host of 'Black Girl Magic' tours and gigs, she demonstrated a hugely woke and political side that Drag Race was in dire need of - too long the show had been sleeping on serious issues and allowing any and all political challenges to be yet another excuse to make dick jokes and throw boring shade at each other. By episode three of S10, though, it became pretty clear that Vixen wasn't really going to do herself any favours.

The feud with Eureka was obviously one of the main season talking points and many took her side because Eureka is annoying and overbearing (and obviously masterminded the whole thing by saying "I wanted to push her", because if there's one word that describes Eureka it's mastermind :joker:) but like... everyone skims over the Untuckeds where she lashes out at queens like Monet, Asia and Monique for saying she wasn't delivering, was acting out of control, and coming across as too aggressive. It's not like Vixen was entirely friendless: Mayhem, Asia and Monique all tried multiple times to get her involved and at ease. She just had... a horrible temper and absolutely piss-poor people skills.

jeuUu6jYkz4

Which leads us onto the disastrous reunion showing, where she stormed offset and made Asia cry. Again, it was terribly en vogue to side with Vixen because Ru had very recently been on a run of saying terribly myopic and ignorant things (re: trans contestants, re: spirituality, re: forgetting queens' names) but if you actually look at the reunion and think she conducted herself maturely... then ok... act the fool, girl. Was she ganged up on? Sure, the whole debacle is reminiscent of a cornered animal lashing out, but let's not forget who she lashed out against and why.

The Vixen wasn't a victim: she was childish and vindictive. You can't blame the editing on her choosing to send Eureka home despite Eureka being top 2 of Snatch Game and having a great mermaid look, out of spite - you can't blame the editing on her calling everyone fake friends and bitches because they said she'd objectively performed the worst - you can't blame the editing on her trying to partner off Aquaria and Eureka and hope they'd sabotage each other whilst she fails to rehearse with Asia - and you can't blame the editing on her rolling her eyes, muttering childish comments and refusing to be professional or try to win tasks.

Long story short: the recent drama with Manila Luzon pretty much cemented my opinion of her. (https://i.redd.it/f7od78v7k9321.jpg)

She won the PharmaRusical challenge for no good goddamn reason (she didn't stand out as much as Blair, Dusty, Asia, Mayhem or Kameron, and her runway was half borrowed from Monique) and otherwise didn't really excel in any of the challenges. Her Snatch Game is an all-time low for the show, she BOMBED at the Bossy Rossy challenge (and should've lipsynced over Mayhem), she sucked at the DragCon panel challenge, and rightly got sent home for the Cher challenge (despite some unfair criticisms on her choreography). The only challenge I feel like she should've placed in the top for was her Week 1 look with the rubber tubes, but even then can you really argue she bested Cracker/Mayhem/Yuhua? It's a stretch. So yeah, I'm putting Vixen this low because she...just didn't do very well, and was a toxic personality.

I hope she grows up, though, because she's talented and dynamic. But there is just too much paranoid, ill-informed anger for me to even entertain the idea she is currently great.

Memorable quote(s): "Y'all already done seen: I walked in the door, "I'm here to fight". Y'all know I'm tough, y'all know I go there. So if you bring it over here, you should already have prepared...I was gonna come back."
Best Runway(s): Either her peacock 'feathers' runway, or the Glitterific one she went home in :love:
Best Moment(s): https://media1.tenor.com/images/df2f6c6ff1f8709af7af73b72d51cc54/tenor.gif?itemid=11643086

[Shaun]

https://media1.tenor.com/images/5c9e35262d11c85d1c0f7f16b8824ae5/tenor.gif?itemid=5076390
80th Place: Tempest DuJour (Season 7) - finished last

I couldn't really justify placing a first-eliminated queen any higher, but I adore Tempest. Of course, if you go by just season 7, she is quickly forgotten and not all that, but the cameos she's enjoyed on various World of Wonder videos and interviews I've watched with Hey Qween just cement her as a really smart, generous, loving person and someone with a fun sensibility.

It wouldn't be fair to ignore her stint on Season 7, though, and she had a pretty unfortunate run. I will say that Sasha Belle should've been in the bottom over her: SHE WORE A VISIBLE BLACK BRA. FOR A NUDE ILLUSION CHALLENGE. How dare you? But yeah she didn't do great, and her comeback episode was another makeover challenge so yeah... we didn't exactly get to see a full representation of what makes Tempest a good drag queen.

The brief moments we saw on the show highlighted how she had adopted two children, was a professor at university, and had recently (prior to filming) shrunk from 400lbs - but if you ever get the time, watch her interview on Hey Qween below where she discusses cruising in a heavily religious community (she used to be a Southern Baptist, and then a Mormon missionary), conversion therapy, living in Saudi Arabia, almost dying in a car accident and more:

HI0pZ8Oqtw8

See also: her and Mrs. Kasha Davis' stint as the "older Trixie & Katya" in one of the UNHhhh episodes (I'll look it up now: episode 38). Her Katyaisms are on point :lovedup:

So yeah, if you take a queen's worth to be purely how she performs on Drag Race, then sure she underwhelmed. But Tempest is, for sure, one of my favourites and a true unique :love:

Memorable quote(s): "How old am I? Really."
Best Runway(s): Well... oh no wait there was a mini-challenge, so this counts :love: (https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B__V_YIVIAA4RFK.jpg)
Best Moment(s): Jumping around helplessly behind Jaidynn Diore Fierce? Dropping a baby out of her vadge in her entrance?

[TomC]

please revive her again!

[Shaun]

it is quite dispiriting to have people say "bring this back!!!" when literally nobody comments between posts anyway

[TomC]

it is quite dispiriting to have people say "bring this back!!!" when literally nobody comments between posts anyway

Sis I can change

[Shaun]

VERY WELL :oh: this list is a bit redundant now that they've chucked together S11 so quickly but I wouldn't know where to start on whether I like 75% of that cast anyway :laugh:

https://66.media.tumblr.com/c1da06d8b560157a555e2a5245eb4928/tumblr_inline_p6dsrruPrS1qais6x_500.gif
79th Place: Kandy Ho (Season 7) - finished 10th

If you had asked me to compile this list towards the tail end of season seven or eight, Kandy would probably have placed in my bottom ten because she'd sent home two of my favourite queens and delivered so little in performance on the show :(

With repeated rewatches though, the hate isn't quite justified, and her lipsyncs are some of the best performances the show has seen. Eventually sent packing by Jaidynn Dior Fierce, Kandy annihilated anyone she went up against and probably did to Jaidynn too if we'd seen the full edit :eyes: (the way the edit cuts away to Jaidynn just before the biggest drop in Ariana Grande's 'Break Free', and Kandy clearly jump-splits because Ariana goes 'WOoOoOOoOOOOO!' whilst Jaidynn is just body-popping). It's such a small moment of a lipsync but the ending of that performance - even though she went home - where she is whipping her ponytail around to literal EDM beats and nothing else, is sf extra and gay and breathtaking that I retroactively stan Kandy Ho.

You might still be asking why I place her this high. It might be for an off-the-show reason, but I do genuinely believe that this is - if not the best - one of the best performances from a pre-season club appearance I've ever seen. You deserve to watch this, it honestly ****s on even the likes of Kennedy and Shangela.

emJQvFRcjww

Unfortunately Kandy had an um... rather abrasive reaction with her fellow queens and if you get off on drag queens giving hilariously awkward and embarrassing interviews in which they throw unnecessary and shallow shade at their entire season of queens (notably not knowing "what does she do?" when asked about Ginger), then check out her Hey Qween and Look at Huh! videos on YouTube. On the season, she is best remembered for insulting Tempest DuJour about her age... and her "what the ****?" soundbite that Lee Dawson has played to death in those videos I presume someone is still watching :idc: but I have abandoned because he plays fully into the racist and body-shaming fans' hands :hmph: Oh and the beard contour, obviously.

Memorable quote(s): "MOTHER DOES NOT...PLAY." Ross: "...that." Kandy: "****."
Best Runway(s): 100% the Bearded Runway, where she looked like some hybrid of the kung fu guy from Kill Bill, and a Dynasty character attending a funeral.
http://i.imgur.com/8G03Vgz.gif
Best Moment(s): As mentioned: definitely her 'Break Free' lipsync. Did get a huge laugh out of Ginger describing her 'Geronimo' lipsync as a playground bully about to beat the crap out of you, though.

[Headie]

I'm here to comment so we get more of these

https://media.giphy.com/media/3ohzdTzCNOOqXwdGYo/giphy.gif

[Smithy]

I think most people enjoy reading these but atm these are all filler queens that nobody really cares about/has an overtly strong opinion on

I read all I just don’t comment :ninja2:

[reece(:]

Kandy Hew

[Black Dagger]

BITCH!!! x

[Tom4784]

I'm glad you've resumed these :clap1:

[TomC]

Didn’t care for ha.

No attempt to be explicit or controversial this time x

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/6R3Z.gif
78th Place: April Carrión (Season 6) - finished 11th

Another queen I adore but can't really justify placing any higher: April chose the wrong season to turn up at Drag Race. Season 6 was so full to the brim of ready-made storylines with Adore/Laganja's history, Dela/Darienne's feud, Joslyn/Courtney's awkwardness, Gia/Milk's feud, Bianca's reads, and Trinity's inner saboteur storyline, that the few queens that didn't make good TV were promptly sent packing.

Which is disheartening because of all of the younger, prettier queens, April's drag is considerably more stunning and enthralling than most. There wasn't one bad runway in the 3 episodes that April lasted, and her critiques from the judges left me a little bit frustrated - she was sent home for putting on padding and shrieking as 'the Big Girl' in Shade: the Rusical, when that is basically a shtick that queens like Eureka and Silky have gone on to claim :oh:

Her two lipsyncs on the show were great, too: she rightly sent Vivacious packing to a high-tempo 'Shake it Up' number, and really - I think - matched the passion and energy brought by Trinity K Bonet to 'I'm Every Woman'. I'll let you be the judge. It's a close one.

Rf7Z2r5kAhU

April is best remembered on the show for flirting with Adam Lambert and sadly, little else. But I earnestly believe she's a queen who has far, far more to give to the show. I would love an Allstars/Earlyboots return (and not just because she's hot af (https://www.instagram.com/p/Bt3fzfLggNv/)):

p/BhrO8pilX35

p/BlVy6cgB_7P

Memorable quote(s): "PUÑETA"
Best Runway(s): All good, but I'd pick her umbrella look for sure.
Best Moment(s): It's hard to say there WERE any with how little airtime she got </3

[TomC]

I loved her and it still kind of boggles my mind she lasted only three episodes. That umbrella look :flutter:

[Shaun]

https://media2.giphy.com/media/3ohs4qGZu2DYUWTnlC/giphy.gif
77th Place: Milk (Season 6, All Stars 3) - finished 9th in both

Proving that I have some semblance of fairness and impartiality when compiling this list, I have placed Milk far higher than I would have if I just went H.A.M. and listed every single instance of delusion and unpleasantness I've observed in Milk.

Where to start? Well, let's dive in with All Stars 3. From the get go she goes "zaddy's home"; fully aware that her time on Season 6 was only really celebrated because of her appearance out of drag. Let alone all of her successes since Season 6 (appearing in a Marc Jacobs ad campaign, modeling for Vivienne Westwood, and Madonna's skincare line) being for what she looks like as 'male', too.

That's fine - surely her drag's evolved though? Not if the visible pen-holder and construction hat under 2 of her 4 wigs had anything to say about it :idc:

Her performances, then? Surely they were fine. No - she went home third but sucked at all 3 challenges. Her Celine Dion performance was utterly BIZARRE and I am still FURIOUS that they placed Chi Chi's great Patti LaBelle in the bottom over this bitch. Her talent show was best summarised by Trixie ("your talent can't be velcro") and all I associate with the memory now is Vanessa Hudgens trying her best to look impressed by the lines "TOUCH. THE FASHION." And Kennedy Davenport's eyeroll, of course. She would finally be be sent packing for a horrific scene-hogging performance in The Bitchelor - a move that even saw her cross the Trixie stans because they thought she ruined Trixie's chances of getting her first 'top 2' placing by constantly interrupting her with some screeches (disclaimer: no, Kennedy and Dela were still 100% better than her anyway).

But the thing that naturally irked me - and others - the most was the entitlement through the season. "That's a lot of emotion for safe" indeed. Reeling off how she'd performed for Celine Dion's wedding planner, saying that Kennedy's "drag wasn't at an all star level", telling Dela "the judges actually want me to continue in this competition", attacking Aja/Chi Chi's drag after being eliminated... the list goes on.

And if you want me to forget all of that and focus on her Season 6 highlights then I counter: WHAT ****ING HIGHLIGHTS? She dressed as boy-RuPaul and no one saw it coming. Big woo. Milk was an asshole and I'm glad I waited this long to oust that stupid bitch! Delayed gratification indeed. But yes, I place her this highly because she is an All Star and provided some decent runways. Her sewing challenge look was good, too (but she didn't ****ing pioneer 'bearded queens' like she claimed, either! Mathu Andersen was FAR more iconic.)

Memorable quote(s): "If you're looking for a dude, or in the preggers mood; Milk is in the house and them other bitches rude". Ugh. Kendrick Lamar wishes.
"The idea of being in the top is so exciting." Shangela: "...well halleloo :)"
Best Runway(s): Probably the toga party in S6
Best Moment(s): Kennedy sending her home no Shangela's talking heads no seriously Gia calling her a ****ing dude stop it guys! I cast a very lacklustre vote for "providing a notable bulge with Adore Delano in that "tops/bottoms" mini-challenge". Yes.

[Black Dagger]

**** of a person. Be gone.

[Smithy]

:skull: savage

She was a ****, surprised she made it that high

[Daniel-X]

The Milk write up is everything right in the world

[TomC]

I don’t even think Milk’s that hot. And he really sucked on AS3

[Tom4784]

Milk's writeup watered my crops and fed the children.

[Shaun]

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FrightenedPlaintiveAngelfish-size_restricted.gif
76th Place: Cynthia Lee Fontaine (Season 8, Season 9) - finished 10th in both

We're starting to tackle the "two-appearances" kinda queens now and the one that I feel most guilty about placing this low is poor Cynthia.

Season 8's Miss Congeniality was everything that is loveable about a drag-race queen: quirky, endlessly optimistic and cheerful, extremely supportive and helpful of the other queens, and the odd little catchphrase that AT THAT TIME wasn't at all annoying.

Unfortunately, this show can turn one-off catchphrases into a never-ending twilight zone of repetition and hell. Some queens manage to conceal their trademarks and play them casually and effectively (Alaska, Alyssa, Shangela). Others rely upon them and land in the bottom two but with some dignity (Trixie's Ru impression, Roxxxy's Tasha Salad). But then there are the Moniques and the Monets and the...*gulps* Cucus.

Whilst I generally have absolutely no time for Lee Dawson's shallow and mean take on the fan-editing process, turning Cynthia's buzzword into a shrill, speaker-breaking orgasm was pretty much the nail on the head for all of the fandom's frustration with Cynthia in season nine. But that's just a word, and it still doesn't dent Cynthia's great personality, so why is she this low? Well, her Roller Girl look is - without doubt - the guaranteed, set in stone, number 1 WORST runway of all time. One bad look would be forgiveable but Cynthia, sadly, brought many, and I think she's the only queen who has a 100% "BOOT" record on Fashion Photo RuView (ignoring queens who went home 1st/2nd, ofc). Not all were deserved (I actually liked her fur runway) but when you consider she tore that off to reveal a black bra and red panties for her lipsync you're left fighting an unwinnable fight.

Performance-wise, Cynthia kinda floundered in both seasons and whilst she had some highlights (Princess Cuculina was adorable, and she brought comedy to the Newsroom that Charlie Hides so RELENTLESSLY crushed), she also bombed many: her take on the Sugar Ball was indeed just Detox's look (that sent Detox home, no less) in pink, her Kardashian lipsync was a disaster (but I will argue she should never have been given the lead :oh: Alexis Michelle you vile beast), and although I think she did better than Robbie, Derrick and Kim Chi, her RuCo's Empire performance was...baffling and then she matched it with Unmentionably Evil Runway #1. There was also the one, fleeting moment where I thought "Cynthia that was horrible you bitch :oh:" and that was when she told Nina Bo'nina Brown she was doing "community service" for choosing Jaymes Mansfield for her team :( Mean.

I will always have love for Cynthia Lee Fontaine, though. She's an incredibly sweet and caring person, and to see someone like that struggle with cancer so visibly on the show was heartbreaking - not to mention her experience with the Pulse Orlando shooting. Also, she provided one of the absolute BEST moments in Season Eight:

gHaYl8WKU_k

Absolute goddess.

Memorable quote(s): "WAaAaAaIT.... second time in HISTORY of RuPaul... TWO ELIMINATED :omgno:"
"You know, it can be like...the butthole :smug:... but let me spill you a story real quick: when I was a shild, mom doesn't want us to say bad words at home. So... one day I was three years old, trying to go to the bathroom, cos I need to, from MY CULO to do caca... she slapped me with a chancleta... so I said cucu mama caca peepee. OK :)"
Best Runway(s): Has to be her fur runway, I guess. The others were all pretty bad </3
Best Moment(s): Sending a heel flying and absolutely DESTROYING a stagelight in the Bitch Perfect performance, whilst Acid Betty tries to get her not to step on glass :love:

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

I’m so excited for like the top 30

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

I bet alaska wins

[Smithy]

I never really got why she was brought back for S9, should have been a different S8 queen imo, I didn’t find cucu that irritating either

[TomC]

i actually prefered cynthia in s9 over s8

she's kinda freaky tho

[Tom4784]

I never really got why she was brought back for S9, should have been a different S8 queen imo, I didn’t find cucu that irritating either

It's because of her diagnosis, I think. She didn't announce it until after the show so I think it was kind of a Eureka deal in which she would have left for medical reasons so they gave her a second chance in Season 9.

[Shaun]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/b129c6ea7d38dd2d5b172dce7d5d9f6f/tumblr_inline_nto5ggcimB1qkv30z_500.gif
75th Place: Max (Season 7) - finished 9th

Max holds a record for the first (and so far only) queen to be eliminated in the first half of the season with two wins under her belt. And she actually deserved those wins as well! Sure, one of them might have been the disastrous Shakesqueer challenge, but a win is a win, and that matters...unless Michelle Visage gets tired of your grey-haired shtick.

I remember feeling abject apathy towards Max during season 7 and I can't say much has changed: editing may well have had a mischievous part to play in what made Max seem so prissy and delicate and pretentious throughout the season but you can't really invent a personality from nothing, so some of it must have been genuine. Max's uncomfortability with the queens' raucous and sexual humour was a recurring theme early on in the season, fueling ridicule from Violet and Miss Fame - and Trixie and Katya have long since joked about her British accent being entirely contrived and ridiculous (which it was).

I do feel bad for Max in the sense that - if tea is to be believed - they threw her under the bus in her final episode and made it look like she took time out, acted a diva, and started singing by herself, sat down, on the runway, when in reality Ru/the producers suggested she distract herself whilst they adjusted the lighting and took a break. She was strong in the Despies episode (but again, that's a sore spot for me since Kasha Davis went home for NOTHING in that episode) and almost all of her runways were absolutely killer:

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a0/39/00/a03900f15a349d4be77b7937a0c09e25.gif

https://i.gifer.com/Wx7W.gif

https://media.giphy.com/media/Xh4tSaSaxUpRS/giphy.gif

However the overall feeling I have of Max is an overwhelming... "meh". I can't root for someone who's so obviously not being themselves. And that Sharon Needles snatch game is perhaps the worst of all time, like wtf were you thinking, girl?

Memorable quote(s): "I feel very uncomfortable right now." re: Pearlgate
Best Runway(s): 100% her Jetset Eleganza with those tote bags :flutter:
Best Moment(s): Erm...

[Daniel-X]

Cynthia is great TV but she kinda sucks at Drag Race :(

[Shaun]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/1f/87/4d/1f874d442186f0a11d0d5ced3f61e744.gif
74th Place: Miss Fame (Season 7) - finished 7th

With every rewatch I do gradually thaw from my frosty hatred of season 7, because whilst Miss Fame is exactly the sort of character who lasted far too long on a season full of other, similarly subdued and superficial queens, a few of them were pretty memorable and solid competitors. Should Miss Fame have outlasted the likes of Jaidynn, Kasha and Trixie though? It's a no from me.

I'm not a hater of Fame by any means, but if you look at the season objectively there really aren't any highlights for her that someone else didn't do far better anyway; she was in the top for the first week's mini fashion-runway but was still destroyed by Violet Chachki, and she performed pretty solidly at the DESPY awards with a quip about "the tapeworm that snatched [her] body" and some great facial reaction shots, but was once again outshone by Pearl, Max and Ginger. She was allegedly in the top for the Shakesqueer challenge, too, but does anyone remember why? :think: no me neither.

Unfortunately for Fame, every other episode was a struggle for her and she just...didn't connect with the judges or the viewers, really. Like Violet, she divided opinion among the fans for being robotic, but beautiful, and whatever quirks she managed to inject were a little meagre compared to her competitors. I don't understand at all how she avoided lipsyncing for Snatch Game with a HORRIBLE Donatella Versace impersonation (Jaidynn sending Max home? At least Jaidynn made jokes. And looked better in leather/lace than Fame :idc:) Fame also bombed at the Ru Hollywood Stories, Glamazonian Airways, and Spoof challenges - but FINALLY landed in the bottom two for the Divine acting challenge.

Even if you ignore the fact that her lipsync with Pearl was inarguably the worst of all time, you just can't really see Miss Fame as a Drag Race legend. She's awkward, uncomfortable, robotic and pristine, sure, and whilst she's an incredibly beautiful and talented drag queen, I just couldn't find anything about her to place any higher than this. I'm 100% sure she's one of those queens who'll never do All Stars, just because she's become something huge off of a pretty lacklustre showing and would almost certainly tank against some of the show's other legends.

Memorable quote(s): "How's your head?" "..... fine :)"
Best Runway(s): Most are great, but I would opt for her Green Runway: took the literal, put a twist on it, and delivered one of the most beautiful colour combinations the show has seen.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b4/37/f5/b437f5f6e3b1bd23c3985a3adbe2dedd.png


Best Moment(s): Helping Katya through her anxiety attacks was adorable, but obviously she is best known for her chicken noises :love: My personal favourite was her hilariously awkward entrance (the first into the room, but still delivers a weird clunky catchphrase to NOBODY :joker:), and ripping off a chunk of Max's newspaper prop to dab her cheek :love:

[TomC]

Awww I really liked Fame. Her runways were always stunning and I thought it was criminal that Pearl got to stay over her.

[Shaun]

Her runways were always stunning and I thought it was criminal that Pearl got to stay over her.

Agreed 100%. Her staying over Pearl, and then finishing 6th/5th whilst Kennedy or Katya make the top 3 would've made Season 7 so much better.

Assuming Fame isn't a good dancer, she'd have had the "too many chances" edit in that Man/Woman dancing challenge and finished 6th, Trixie makes top 5 and probably beats Katya/Kennedy in the Hello Kitty sewing challenge, so Katya still finishes 5th, and then Trixie ends up 4th most likely :think:

Would've made the arc for Violet winning a lot stronger, being up against TWO bitter old ladies rather than just one. But would've been an incredibly strong top 3, too.

[Shaun]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/60591926702484b80195bdf6bf8658b6/tumblr_n7m746gPKv1s1i7p3o5_500.gif
73rd Place: Ivy Winters (Season 5) - finished 7th

Heading dangerously into the territory of this list where all of you start to whine "but Shaun :( she should be higher :(" now, and next to get the chop is a name you can no longer say without the chilling, grating cadence of LaToya Jackson: EYE VEEEEEE WINTURRRRRRRRRRS.

Long before Ivy was the single line that landed Eureka in the bottom two in Season 10, she was an actual drag race queen and handed a very flattering and adorable edit in Season 5. Even as I prepare to dive into explaining why I'm ousting her already, I'm starting to feel guilty: Ivy is one of those queens wished for every time the casting rumours start buzzing for each season of All Stars, and with good reason. Many other queens have waxed lyrical about Ivy's many, many talents: she's a circus performer, a costume designer, a carpenter, made quilts, made stop-motion Claymation for his own music video, a basket weaver, she stains glass, makes her own jam, her own CHEESE... honestly, head to her Instagram and you'll find a new arts and crafts upload pretty much every week. She is insanely artistic and talented.

However, all of that... just didn't really translate to Season Five, and I won't argue that this was all her fault. I've said it a lot on here: Season 5 was an amazing season, however it was also exhausting and so driven by the same, tiring storylines (Coco vs. Alyssa, Rolaskatox vs. Jinkx) that anyone who didn't quite make the cut... was cut. It was thus inevitable that once all the filler dried up, Ivy would have to go before Coco & Alyssa. And it's not exactly unfair, either: Ivy bombed Snatch Game with a terrible Marilyn Monroe, she put together a confusing advert for her perfume, and delivered a pretty abysmal roast (but in an incredibly tough lineup, to be fair to her). But was she really, on the whole, worse than Coco or Alyssa? No - but unfortunately those two happen to be the strongest lipsyncers the show has ever seen.

In terms of storyline, she deservedly takes Miss Congeniality from Latrice Royale, and is liked by pretty much everyone; a little too much by Jinkx Monsoon, in a hilariously awkward storyline that saw Jinkx reveal to the workroom that she has "a crush on Ivy Winters". That reunion moment is exquisite schadenfreude, do watch. I still scream whenever I rewatch that episode, because they REALLY TRIED to make the 'Coming Up!' edit look like Ivy, crying and saying "I LOVE YOU", was really to Jinkx when it was actually to her Mom in a phone call home :joker: sf messy

As for Ivy's on-show strengths? She won the Can I Get an Amen? challenge and did exceptionally well at most of the others - Wikipedia has her Week 1 as a "HIGH" placing when she was criticised for not wearing anything that resembled trash, though, so perhaps she is being oversold :suspect: - and was great at the Untucked Lipsync with Honey and Lineysha. She was also a capable dancer in the demanding ballet challenge.

With the number of Allstars seasons churning out now, it surely seems a matter of time before Ivy is cast, and she's definitely one I look forward to seeing compete to see what new talents she has to offer: it's just with Drag Race there's such a huge emphasis on comedy and lipsyncing and it's a shame really that those don't seem to be her forte.

Memorable quote(s): "She can't pull off 'crazy garbage'. She'll be going home before me :)" - about Coco Montrese :unsure:
Best Runway(s): It's a close tie between her Cher replica and the dress she made out of pictures of herself.
Best Moment(s): Erm...

[Smithy]

I really didn’t like Max she just served the same look over and over, she reminded me a lot of Milk iirc

I liked Fame :( she was done dirty, if she’d been on a more design/creative heavy series as apposed to the constant acting challenges, I feel like she’d have done better; or at least gotten a lot less hate. Also she said she’d never do an All Stars so don’t worry about that :fan:

[Smithy]

Best Moment(s): Erm...

Fffff Poor Ivy :skull:

Wasn’t she a bit deluded with how good her perfume advert was gonna be and then it was tragic :joker:

[Daniel-X]

I didn’t mind Fame but she definitely outstayed her welcome.

I’ve never ever understood the love for Ivy, she was annoying and forgettable.

[Samm]

Upon second watch, Fame was ****ing hilarious her little mannerisms were hilarious

[Black Dagger]

I mainly remember Ivy for the "coming up" bit where Jinkx said she had a crush and it cut to her saying I love you but it was to her Mum lol.

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/8RDs.gif
72nd Place: Kim Chi (Season 8) - finished 2nd/3rd (but 2nd, let's face it)

This is my biggest culling so far and I have good reason, so hear me out.

In recent seasons I've had a huge complaint with the amount of production interference and the show trying to orchestrate just who exactly will be the fans' "queen to root for". It's understandable: the show has thrived thanks to loveable underdogs like Katya, Dela, Sharon Needles and Trixie Mattel. But in recent years the edits have become so obviously trite and favourable and with Kim Chi they made quite the mistake: she was neither underappreciated nor wildly-talented*. She came into season 8 with an incredibly strong following on Instagram, and a reputation that preceded her - so it was odd to me that production seemed so desperate to make her look vulnerable and ostracised:

https://media1.tenor.com/images/680827fda65b2938b49cdcd43c551e30/tenor.gif?itemid=5218207

This scene in particular PISSES ME OFF every time I rewatch because it's just so contrived and desperate to come across as a victim, and completely at odds with Kim's ability - all season - to fire back a witty retort at the other queens. Most other queens on Drag Race, if they suck at dancing, don't get such a hugely sympathetic edit, and thus it irked me that they tried it with Kim Chi. It wasn't just sympathy they tried to heavily influence her edit / talking heads with: look at the "doughnut come for me" line in the opening episode. Very similar to that Season 7 talking-head with Pearl having a producer "throw water at her to wake her up" - completely fabricated, artificial and unnecessary, and immediately throws up all sorts of production interference allegations. I know these examples are insignificant in the long run, but they build and every single bit of reality TV editing is there for a damn reason, so wake up pearlople :oh:

*Let me rephrase that: Kim Chi is an extremely talented make-up artist. Perhaps the greatest the show has ever seen. She can put together a killer runway.

BUT - can you actually remember a challenge (that wasn't design-based) that she actually did well at? I can't, and I've rewatched the season about 10 times. It is actually one of my biggest frustrations with the show of all time that Kim Chi joined the elite likes of Alaska, Courtney Act, Tyra Sanchez and Violet Chachki in never having to lipsync for her life, ESPECIALLY when she performed so piss-poorly in so many challenges! In RuCo's empire she was almost incoherent and just screeched and tongue-popped ad nauseum. In the Shady Politics episode she SUCKED and couldn't even put emphasis on the phrase "what a fat-ass", but was saved by a BS "judging in pairs" twist because Naomi actually did a good job. She also clunked around awkwardly in Bitch Perfect, but was given a favourable part that had more than 1 line (RIP Laila). It's also a shame that almost all of her stunning runways were undermined by a total lack of stage presence and inability to walk in heels.

She did FINE at Snatch Game, and she put together a competent 'angry punk' performance but was ultimately carried by Robbie Turner in Les Chicken Wings. And I can't hate Kim Chi because she is quite funny on Twitter, and pretty quick and witty too - it's just a shame she really dragged Season 8 down, and I was especially pissed off by her attacks on Bob in the Top 5 challenge for not having "the look" to win Drag Race. She had everything else you shallow bitch.

Also: MUG with Naomi Smalls was excruciating. They have a good friendship but zero charisma.

Memorable quote(s): "Oh, hello Rucius' doctor... it's Rucius' doctor..." :unsure:
"Chi Chi... your drag is just like turkey neck: cheap and no one wants it."
Best Runway(s): I would opt for the Black & White look; her mime was gorgeous. Should've still lipsynced though :idc:
Best Moment(s): That clip that Lee Dawson keeps using in her videos, where she mimics slapping the little woman she's working with and calling her a "****ing bitch" :love:

kNrUibErPwc

Same episode: Marc Jacobs' describing of her performance. "The trading of the brooms."

[Smithy]

:o

I haven’t rewatched S8 so I’ve never really had that take on her, but I’d deffo say there’s queens which deserve to be lower than her

[Daniel-X]

Yes @ the Kim cull. Ridiculously overrated, zero charisma and the edit she had was so ****ing contrived.

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/3o7TKyRFgHCMUZ2GHK/giphy.gif
71st Place: Trinity K Bonet (Season 6) - finished 7th

Speaking of queens that got hugely favourable "journey" edits that might not've been thoroughly deserved, we now bid adieu to Trinity K Bonet, one of Season 6's many lipsync assassins (Darienne, Adore, Laganja, Joslyn, April, Vivacious :love:).

At face value, watching Season 6, the path of Trinity for the viewer is pretty straightforward. She enters too timidly, and yet also quite full of delusion ("And you're Beyonce?" "Oh, I am!") and has to be knocked down a peg or two by Bianca Del Rio and various guest judges ("PUT A CORK IN IT. Literally :)"), in order for the RuPaul School of Overcoming Your Inner Saboteur mantras to fully come into effect. Cue: tearful motherly moment from Ru, a heartbreaking HIV storyline, and a miraculous blossoming from Trinity in the Glamazon advert and stand-up comedy challenges.

Only, the problem is: in the advert she was heavily coached by Bianca Del Rio, and I'm sure I've seen tea somewhere that her jokes for her set were actually written for her :skull: and the early-season edit of Trinity was so amped-up in its negativity and hostility that it just further undermines what exactly she supposedly overcome. Almost all instances of her airtime prior to the first Dela/Darienne lipsync are her whining about "this challenge isn't in my comfort zone", "I don't sing live, I don't dance, I don't act", and "I don't want to do ghetto for this role". So it wasn't exactly the most believable turnaround to go from self-doubting, stubborn fool to 'the world is my oyster' optimism in 3 episodes.

All in all, Trinity is one of the few queens who I still haven't really made my mind up about at all: there's no denying her talents, and yet the show was so confusing in its portrayal of her, that you can't help but be left thinking: did she even deserve to be eliminated? Because that episode where Joslyn not only brought up the topic of abortion whilst interviewing Chaz Bono & Georgia Holt, but also wore the ugliest Claire's mishmash in an otherwise glorious Animal Runway (Courtney's wings! Dela's fly! Trinity's bird! Bianca's leopard!) and STILL escaped the bottom two whilst Trinity was thrown to the dogs for mis-pronouncing Chaz's name... still haunts me! It made no sense, but then Season 6's bottom two placements rarely did.

I think on the balance of things, though, Trinity is very much an underwhelming Drag Race girl: her Snatch Game Nicki Minaj was terrible, her Shade: the Rusical showing was mushmouthed, and whilst I didn't think it was the worst, she was panned for her verse in the Oh No She Better Don't rap. Trinity is essentially best remembered for her lipsyncs and a couple of runways. However, that's just season 6 and a few episodes of her drag - she's clearly an articulate, interesting, and talented queen and her interview with Hey Qween is, surprisingly, one of the most engaging. She's definitely a queen I'd like to see more of, because Season 6 left her very...on the scrapheap.

There are also some heavily shady and suspect stories from Reddit about Trinity being something of a scam artist but... well that's just hear-say isn't it :unsure: (FYI, this is a thread about Trinity ALLEGEDLY faking a story that a container storing all of her drag had 'burned' and she set up a Gofundme to try and 'start again', only for all such posts to later be deleted. There's also a story about Bianca being asked for money by another queen 'for medication' that's heavily implied to be about Trinity, too, but idk go search for that yourselves!) (https://www.reddit.com/r/rupaulsdragrace/comments/4lfva9/trinity_deleted_all_traces_of_the_alleged_fire/)

Memorable quote(s): "The only way we had an opportunity to eat was: our mother would read us recipes from a cookbook. And oh... how I got full, many nights, off the Roast Beef on page 27... but a really unfortunate thing happened: my sister caught an ear infection so she starved to death." - hers or written for her, it was delivered amazingly :love:
Best Runway(s): Absolutely the one she went home in.
Best Moment(s): I don't have a specific, but she was an angel in Untucked and constantly building the other queens' confidence :love:

[Daniel-X]

Miss K Bonet did NOT deserve such a low placing. Like you say, her lip syncs and runways are what she’s probably best known for but I just found her such an endearing presence in S6, especially when I rewatched last year.

[Tom4784]

I always liked Trinity, I think she was in the wrong season though.

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/MLsk.gif
70th Place: Pandora Boxx (Season 2, All Stars 1) - finished 5th and last, respectively

I still don't really know where to sit with Pandora. If I were to base this all entirely on her Season 2 showing, she would almost certainly place higher for reasons I will delve into - but sadly, All Stars 1 happened and a whole bunch of uncomfortable, shady and stupid moments have occurred post-Drag Race that leave a bad taste.

Let's start with the good: Pandora was the prototype that the show needed to usher in a comedic, esoteric, and alternative sense of drag into a pageant-heavy competition where all the competitors were preoccupied with how fishy they passed as. Her Snatch Game - whilst not a winner - was a crucial move that paved the way for future curveballs and queens being comfortable with playing someone older, kookier, quirkier and funnier. It's hard to picture Snatch Game even making it into future seasons without her interpretation of it, and her Carol Channing was absolutely superb. Better than Bob's, and I'm a huge Bob stan (we'll see how much later on!) Across Season 2, Pandora was a calm and muted presence in a whole cast of dramatic, childish bitches - often mediating and totally oblivious to the toxic meanness from the likes of Raven, Sonique and Morgan. She wasn't completely neutral: she did join the queens in exposing Tyra to be "a complete bitch". She also draws natural comparison to one of the show's most beloved queens - Jinkx Monsoon - in that she was a natural with the acting and comedy challenges (she did well in the advert for shortening, and the book campaign), but kept being attacked by Santino for her runways.

I will also say that it was absolutely baffling that she landed in the bottom two for the Makeover challenge: her drag mother looked identical, they performed well, and they had buckets of personality (whilst Tyra painted her mother to look like that baby covered in peanut butter* and Tatianna was saved by her mom pulling a scared face during the performance? I don't see any other reason.) She was sent home by Jujubee for that and that alone. Weird.

*https://i.imgur.com/pQ1zThh.png
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BQNTBciW9VM/hqdefault.jpg

I mean...

HOWEVER: her drag looks were far too plain and it was easy to see why Santino, Billy and Bob Mackie were unimpressed by her. She only really had Merle in her corner. But my main concern with Pandora Boxx stems from All Stars. If you're one of the few who've watched AS1 and endured the horrible pairs twist, then you'll have witnessed Pandora completely shut down, isolate herself from the group, and absolutely refuse to work with Mimi Imfurst. Say what you will about having to be partnered with Mimi, but at least Mimi tried. That whole first episode is excruciating, and fixed around this perception that Pandora's evolved and is ready to slay, but oh no :( she's stuck with Mimi :( even going as far to sulk "I wasn't picked. Well... Mimi picked me but I didn't pick her". She's even wearing her own damn t-shirt in the workroom. The girl's ego was BRUISED. RuPaul would later ask in the workroom: "Why do you think the universe has put you together?" to which Pandora responds, "...I'm a glutton for punishment?" and Mimi looks physically hurt :( Later on, she tells the camera "I don't belong in the bottom two. Mimi put us there."

She also has a pretty strong reputation for being standoffish and ***** with meet and greets and fans. So yeah, **** Pandora Boxx. Also, this is the sort of thing that makes her a "comedy queen"? No ma'am.

5kpsuXYKK1A

Memorable quote(s): "What I brought here wasn't what they were looking for. **** 'em."
Best Runway(s): The only good one was her Gone With The Wind sewing challenge, tbh?
Best Moment(s): I mean... obviously Carol Channing.

[Smithy]

There are also some heavily shady and suspect stories from Reddit about Trinity being something of a scam artist but... well that's just hear-say isn't it (FYI, this is a thread about Trinity ALLEGEDLY faking a story that a container storing all of her drag had 'burned' and she set up a Gofundme to try and 'start again', only for all such posts to later be deleted. There's also a story about Bianca being asked for money by another queen 'for medication' that's heavily implied to be about Trinity, too, but idk go search for that yourselves!)

:skull::skull: a damn MESS

[Smithy]

In the words of Latrice, We don’t count All Stars 1 baby!

[TomC]

Yeah I didn’t like Pandora on AS1.

[Shaun]

Just noticed I forgot to put in a picture showing just how bloody awful Tyra's makeover was. It's in a spoiler since the only good-quality pic I could find happens to be bigger than Ginger Minj's AS2 airtime.

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/61WRMyahjzBmXEoGT7/giphy.gif
69th (nice) Place: Blair St. Clair (Season 10) - finished 9th

I'm really playing around with the order a lot at the moment and I'd just like to point out that basically everyone from 75th to 64th is pretty interchangeable.

So... at the start of Season 10 - and indeed before the premiere, when the cast was actually revealed - I had Blair down as the most obvious bit of filler and, with Kalorie, one of the most obvious early sashays. The idea that the likes of Mayhem and Yuhua would fall before her was pretty bizarre to me, and yet: that's what happened.

Whilst I will die on a hill to proclaim that MAYHEM WAS DONE DIRTY, I will admit I was wrong about Blair St. Clair and she was a real dark horse at one point in time. Showing up at Season 10 on what was presumably, at first, a school field trip, Blair quickly became a fan favourite because she's white, young, blonde and skinny with a pretty solid run of performances. She finished in the top for the first 3 episodes in a row, delivering a great turn in the Apps challenge, a cute fairy-godmother character in the PharmaRusical, and constructing a weird space-age valley girl in the Drag on a Dime challenge. Behind the scenes, she was congenial, sweet and full of praise and smiles for the workroom.

She also of course shared her heartbreaking story about being raped at a frat-party and how that had impacted her worldview and what she wanted to bring to drag - which is of course courageous and beautiful of her, and she's definitely cemented herself as one of the show's strongest and most inspirational queens in that respect. Off the show, she's started to forge a rather impressive music career: 'Now or Never' was a bonafide bop!

However, I couldn't quite lodge firmly in the Team Blair camp (and that's not because of the Iraq War) and here's why:

https://i2.wp.com/78.media.tumblr.com/1cf257d3352725958751f1be3a59a6b1/tumblr_p76q61S5r11upznp7o5_1280.png?w=605&ssl=1

Reason #1 - you cannot tell me these three ball looks are anything other than "Bottom 2 material". At the VERY LEAST she should've been bottom 3 over Asia, but that ill-fitting pink vinyl is hideous, that fur coat is NO BETTER than Alexis Michelle's travesty from season 9, and that bikini is so BASIC. This leads me onto...
Reason #2 - most of her runways, and indeed her drag I fear, were dresses and costumes that were just far too big on her. They truly drowned her out. Take her best drag look:

https://i.pinimg.com/236x/22/93/29/229329f97b6699a3b3d4a8710f22f5ab.jpg

It's a gorgeous dress, sure, but it makes her look like a 14 year old in a school theatre production of Miss Saigon.

And finally, Reason #3 - she just didn't have the nerve to go far enough. Part of her charm is her effortless loveability, and sweetness, but when asked to throw shade or lead a panel, Blair fell short and left nothing of substance, sadly. I do think she delivered a great lipsync against The Vixen, though, and part of me wishes she'd stayed so we had a better narrative than "Vixen vs. the World".

Also - and this is an incredibly shallow observation of me - but Blair's uh... surgery... just makes her... oh god I hate myself for saying it but... she looks scary to me now. Like sure, it's tradition for queens to get a lip done or some botox after a season, but I don't know why but Blair's face just looks completely different to me now.

asWMwIsJ_w0

Memorable quote(s): "We're here to turn some of your wig woes into...wig...wows :)"
Best Runway(s): I didn't like the feathered one much, or her 'Best Drag', so I would opt for her Hats Incredible look where she looked like a vintage doll :love:
Best Moment(s): I loved her 'fresh off the bus' performance in that mini-challenge where they had to advertise Ru's peanut butter chocolate bar, where she falls against a ladder for no reason :love:

[Shaun]

https://media1.tenor.com/images/2bf49bcea7e99df1b75b5dca62dde3c8/tenor.gif?itemid=5625917
68th Place: Joslyn Fox (Season 6) - finished 6th

Look, everyone liked Joslyn Fox. She was the most obvious underdog edit in the history of the show: a loveable girl with nowhere near the level of talent and skill as Courtney, Bianca or Dela, but a huge heart and a whole range of catchphrases waiting to happen. I can't think of someone who watched Season 6 and didn't at least "like" Joslyn, and I'll go into why before I tear the girl down and say "get the **** out of my ranking". In terms of performance, she did a pretty hilarious Teresa Giudice in Snatch Game and her role in the horror-movie sequels as the "GASP!"ing sidekick was understated and yet also great. Her talking heads spouted a whole bunch of memorable moments: "womp womp", "the black horse of the competition", "that's not my...cup of soup", etc. Her 'surprise marriage' at the Season 6 reunion is also one of the show's most heart-warming and nourishing moments in the show's history.

Here's why she's going now: she sucked at way too many challenges. If you take out the two challenges mentioned above, and a pretty good turn in the Rusical as the Butch Queen, she really struggled in pretty much everything else. When it came to design, she constructed a wonderfully tacky Quinceañera dress in her first episode and some monstrous make-up job on her hetero (and ****ing stupid) wedding-challenge partner. When it came to comedy, she was more naturally funny than trying to be, because she bombed at the Standup and decided to put herself before Bianca Del Rio in the lineup, and also did pretty piss-poor in the Glamazon advert with Courtney. But her absolute worst moment was, of course, the interview I've already mentioned in which she begins: "Please welcome someone who has come out twice since coming out of Cher, and someone who's came back 66 years after Cher came out of her.... now, if it weren't for a last minute decision at the abortion clinic, the world wouldn't have known Cher." I just. I can't. It was so awful :joker: and I only use :joker: in the "oh god make her stop" sense.

Her runways were also critiqued too often for being either too *****y, too basic or too cheap-looking, and that leads us onto her storyline with Courtney which was just ridiculous. The edit taking their interactions to be one big "never meet your heroes!" arc that basically threw Courtney under the bus for treating the show as a competition rather than a sorority was just absurd, and whilst I understand Joslyn was probably put out by Courtney telling her her makeup wasn't polished (IT. WASN'T. LOOK BELOW.) and calling her a "low rent Courtney Act" in the reading challenge, it's....it's drag, darling, and a drag competition at that.

http://i153.photobucket.com/albums/s238/petstarr/Drag%20Race/joslastwk.jpg
yikes

But yes... absolute sweetheart and I hope she returns for AllStars one day.

Memorable quote(s): "I'm going to be the butch queen" Ru: "Oh the butch queen? Where are you gonna draw your inspiration?" Joslyn: "Bianca Del Rio :)"
"Cummin." Ru: "Oh, you mean cumin?" Joslyn: "Cummin :)" Ru: "It's pronounced cumin-" Joslyn: "....cummin :)"
Best Runway(s): They were all pretty bad :( but I guess I'd say her RuPaul runway.
Best Moment(s): In compiling all of her challenge moments I nearly forgot arguably her best one: her verse in Oh No She Better Don't was :clap1: killer :clap1:

[RileyH]

joslyn :lovedup:

[Daniel-X]

Joslyn could’ve easily been like out 4th/5th it baffles me how she made it so far.

[Smithy]

Blair should have been a bit higher I think, just bc she was such a dark horse in the challenges, she’s so fishy now too, her looks scalp

How Joslyn lasted as long as she did in S6 still baffles me tbh

[zrc]

Outside of Bianca, Ben, Adore, Courtney and Darriene the others could've been eliminated in any order in S6 tbh. And even then I don't think Darriene was all that safe either.

[Shaun]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/1f1b8b916fc9035e247c0f57d56b1840/tumblr_mhcvliLZjw1rthi3ao1_400.gif
67th Place: Lineysha Sparx (Season 5) - finished 9th

I don't think anyone apart from Bendelacreme in AS3 has ever won the first two episodes of a season, but if someone was going to buck that trend on a regular season of Drag Race, it should've been Lineysha Sparx. Lineysha did indeed win episode two, the Lipsync challenge where queens had to recreate infamous Untucked moments from seasons past (Lineysha won for an amusing Tyra Sanchez, although it really should've been a joint win with Honey Mahogany's brilliant Mystique impression). However she was pipped to the first win by Roxxxy Andrews in the 'dumpster drag' design challenge. If you look at their two efforts side by side? I love myself some Roxxxy but girl...

https://66.media.tumblr.com/7402603907971bd8d7e75ba41a400f1a/tumblr_mhat5rIEnA1rhzliao5_250.gifhttps://66.media.tumblr.com/af64b2c7e3be6ed87700f4e18ac84f52/tumblr_p1r8mhdlgg1vfnk4to2_250.gif

She literally made that from card and wallpaper. There's a heel in her hair. How did she not win? :(

Onto the negatives: sadly, Lineysha did pretty terribly at all of the other three episodes she was on. In the kids TV challenge she literally just translated Ivy Winters' lines into Spanish without any comedy or energy, in the ballet she admitted the cardinal sin of 'not knowing who Diana Ross is', and her Snatch Game character was a mess. I will argue though that she was not anywhere near as bad as Ivy Winters' Marilyn Monroe, or Jade's Taylor Swift, because she was at least awkwardly funny and shouldn't have been in the B2 with Detox, but the show unfortunately has a huge propensity towards ridiculing any non-English speakers and making them seem foolish.

Lineysha is also one of those queens whose lipsync that sent them home wasn't even that bad! Watch it again, Cher's 'Take Me Home' versus Detox. Lineysha does a pretty excellent job, and writhes around the stage looking like a Prince girlband member, but unfortunately Detox pulled out her wobbly-lips shtick and annihilated her :(

Other than that, all I can remember of Lineysha is that she was damn fine both in and out of drag. But I can't keep her around any longer just for that.

Memorable quote(s): "I'm very fine here :) my english is not berry good-looking :)"
Best Runway(s): All pretty good, but I'd have to go for the GIF I used above.
Best Moment(s): Um...

[Smithy]

She should have won ep 1 but her win in ep 2 was a complete fluke, it’s ONLY because she had the role of Tyra and had no idea what she was doing (imo) that she won. She was stunning but she had 0 charisma

[Headie]

Best Moment(s): Um...

https://media1.tenor.com/images/47304e84f4f5f9d4e38fcb37abcff6a1/tenor.gif?itemid=5312910

[RileyH]

queen

[Smithy]

https://media1.tenor.com/images/47304e84f4f5f9d4e38fcb37abcff6a1/tenor.gif?itemid=5312910

:joker:

[zrc]

I don't remember her at all.

[Shaun]

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/3d/7d/8d/3d7d8d4252dec4463c5ce985b0c2f6fb.gif
66th Place: Jaidynn Diore Fierce (Season 7) - finished 8th

During season 7, Jaidynn was one of my favourites by the default process of 'everyone else being boring as hell', and whilst with the passage of time my love for her has subdued somewhat, she is definitely still a season 7 highlight. She should 100% have been voted 'Miss Congeniality' if that title still meant something, because Katya really wasn't that selfless, an underdog, or helpful to the other queens in the way that Jaidynn was. And whilst I might not stan Jaidynn as much as I do the likes of Ginger, Kennedy or Katya, I will still go out on a limb and argue that the show's treatment of her was particularly unfair and a clear example of "a queen we need to get rid of".

Not that too many of her criticisms were unjustified... but a lot of them were harsh, and situations where you have to wonder: who else would've succeeded with that role? Take her elimination: she's paired with Tempest DuJour and asked to make herself a conjoined twin with her. It's just... not possible, even if you went for a comedy route you'd still have Michelle whining about there being "no family resemblance". Then the other two times Jaidynn landed in the bottom two? Sure, her Snatch Game as alifetimesupplyofRaven Symone wasn't stellar but she at least prompted laughs from the guests/Ru whilst Miss Fame, Violet, Max and I would say even Katya just floundered. And the first time she landed in the bottom two, for that bizarre Hollywood Stories episode as RuPaul, was pretty unfair too, and the one I'm actually maddest about: She was torn apart for that 'Death Becomes Her' runway despite it being the most creative and interesting idea, an escaped convict dying on the barbed wire. MEANWHILE you have Pearl wearing a ****ing neck-brace and some lingerie and delivering a piss-poor acting performance and SHE WASN'T EVEN BOTTOM THREE? God I need to get therapy after season 7, there was so much ****ing ridiculousness that season.

Happy thoughts. Jaidynn's positives? Aside from her token little sayings ("WERK THAT PUSS"), Jaidynn actually did pretty well at most of the challenges; her 'Bianca Del Rio' in the Spoof! episode could arguably have won if I'm honest (it was more original and risky than Kennedy treading out that tired 'Ain't Nobody Got Time For That!' meme but I am happy with Kennedy getting a win, and Ru/Michelle/Carson adore tired comedy, so whatever). She also did well in the disastrous Shakesqueer challenge, and co-hosting the DESPYs with Kennedy Davenport calling her a wall clock :love: Then there was her 'safe' performance in the Glamazonian Airways challenge, despite a memorable performance of giving head to an inflatable pilot.

I don't really have anything else to say about Jaidynn - she isn't a queen I stan the hell out of, but she was great nonetheless and a total sweetheart. It also takes a damn good queen to send home Kandy Ho in a lipsync, irrespective of it being Kandy's 3rd time and being edited hugely in her favour :tongue:

1zIVnCq8Ljw

Memorable quote(s): "She's living, so... I'm living for her gig, baby."
"I got this big girl strapped to my back, and I'm serving Hashtag The Best I Can Do Right Now In This Situation."
Best Runway(s): Jetset Eleganza was pretty strong, even if she misinterpreted it and went for an actual air hostess rather than the passenger :love: I also liked her Leather/Lace look, for the hair alone.
Best Moment(s): Screaming "I FORGOT MY LINE!" at Ross Matthews for no damn reason :joker:

[Withano]

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FrightenedPlaintiveAngelfish-size_restricted.gif
76th Place: Cynthia Lee Fontaine (Season 8, Season 9) - finished 10th in both

We're starting to tackle the "two-appearances" kinda queens now and the one that I feel most guilty about placing this low is poor Cynthia.

Season 8's Miss Congeniality was everything that is loveable about a drag-race queen: quirky, endlessly optimistic and cheerful, extremely supportive and helpful of the other queens, and the odd little catchphrase that AT THAT TIME wasn't at all annoying.

Unfortunately, this show can turn one-off catchphrases into a never-ending twilight zone of repetition and hell. Some queens manage to conceal their trademarks and play them casually and effectively (Alaska, Alyssa, Shangela). Others rely upon them and land in the bottom two but with some dignity (Trixie's Ru impression, Roxxxy's Tasha Salad). But then there are the Moniques and the Monets and the...*gulps* Cucus.

Whilst I generally have absolutely no time for Lee Dawson's shallow and mean take on the fan-editing process, turning Cynthia's buzzword into a shrill, speaker-breaking orgasm was pretty much the nail on the head for all of the fandom's frustration with Cynthia in season nine. But that's just a word, and it still doesn't dent Cynthia's great personality, so why is she this low? Well, her Roller Girl look is - without doubt - the guaranteed, set in stone, number 1 WORST runway of all time. One bad look would be forgiveable but Cynthia, sadly, brought many, and I think she's the only queen who has a 100% "BOOT" record on Fashion Photo RuView (ignoring queens who went home 1st/2nd, ofc). Not all were deserved (I actually liked her fur runway) but when you consider she tore that off to reveal a black bra and red panties for her lipsync you're left fighting an unwinnable fight.

Performance-wise, Cynthia kinda floundered in both seasons and whilst she had some highlights (Princess Cuculina was adorable, and she brought comedy to the Newsroom that Charlie Hides so RELENTLESSLY crushed), she also bombed many: her take on the Sugar Ball was indeed just Detox's look (that sent Detox home, no less) in pink, her Kardashian lipsync was a disaster (but I will argue she should never have been given the lead :oh: Alexis Michelle you vile beast), and although I think she did better than Robbie, Derrick and Kim Chi, her RuCo's Empire performance was...baffling and then she matched it with Unmentionably Evil Runway #1. There was also the one, fleeting moment where I thought "Cynthia that was horrible you bitch :oh:" and that was when she told Nina Bo'nina Brown she was doing "community service" for choosing Jaymes Mansfield for her team :( Mean.

I will always have love for Cynthia Lee Fontaine, though. She's an incredibly sweet and caring person, and to see someone like that struggle with cancer so visibly on the show was heartbreaking - not to mention her experience with the Pulse Orlando shooting. Also, she provided one of the absolute BEST moments in Season Eight:

gHaYl8WKU_k

Absolute goddess.

Memorable quote(s): "WAaAaAaIT.... second time in HISTORY of RuPaul... TWO ELIMINATED :omgno:"
"You know, it can be like...the butthole :smug:... but let me spill you a story real quick: when I was a shild, mom doesn't want us to say bad words at home. So... one day I was three years old, trying to go to the bathroom, cos I need to, from MY CULO to do caca... she slapped me with a chancleta... so I said cucu mama caca peepee. OK :)"
Best Runway(s): Has to be her fur runway, I guess. The others were all pretty bad </3
Best Moment(s): Sending a heel flying and absolutely DESTROYING a stagelight in the Bitch Perfect performance, whilst Acid Betty tries to get her not to step on glass :love:

You were doing well up to this!

[Withano]

Loved Ivy and Blair too

The rest are pretty accurate

[Shaun]

https://i1.wp.com/www.dailydoseofqueer.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/tyrasanchez-bitch.gif?resize=500%2C218
65th Place: Tyra Sanchez (Season 2) - finished 1st

If I were to be far more impulsive with my decisions in this ranking, then sure, Tyra would've finished far lower. But even with all of my bargaining and rationalising about how she's clearly not a terrible queen, I still have difficulty placing her any higher. Tyra Sanchez is a complicated queen to unpack, so I'll give it my best shot.

Season 2 is one of the best seasons, that much is a given. The drama is real, authentic and complex, and the personalities are too. Even the fan favourites had layers of nastiness and that kind of humanity that's all too lacking now thanks to season after season of trying to mute themselves and not get into any controversy with the fans. Tyra Sanchez was never a fan favourite, though, but still maintains a shroud of notoriety that it's unlikely any other winner will claim (unless, like, Eureka wins AS5 or something).

Let's dissect her strengths: Tyra's youthful drag had a hell of a lot of polish that her contemporaries did not. Tatianna, Jessica Wild, Jujubee and Mystique were the only other super-young queens that season and all of them struggled a lot with the runways and makeup, but Tyra almost always looked faultless. In terms of performances, she did very well at the Crisco Shortening advert challenge playing a baby with a goofy voice, she showed a hell of a lot of commitment in the wedding makeover challenge by literally hot-gluing lace to her skin, and she made a whole host of clever ploys for attention on the runways (spray-painting the word 'SANTINO' on some shopping bags :love:, turning a look into 3 options for her country runway).

Unfortunately for Tyra, Drag Race is a lot more than 3 episodes and she really showed her ass in some of the other ones. Back in the days of immunity, it would've been hard to explain why she shouldn't have been bottom 2 for her woeful Beyonce in 'Snatch Game' (but I would argue she shouldn't have been: Sonique and Morgan were pretty much indisputably worse). I mentioned in the Pandora Boxx writeup just how awful her makeover for her 'Golden Gal' was, and she also had immunity for the 'Ladyboy' live performance challenge which uh... I'll let you see for yourselves.

lhulF4GsfYc

This time I would've indeed placed her in the bottom, but a Tyra vs. Juju lipsync before the top 5? That would've hurt the show.

Of course, the biggest problem with Tyra is... her personality. The show attempts to portray the first of many "growth" arcs that would later explain the likes of Violet, Aquaria and Sharon winning, but unfortunately for Tyra it was just hard to make a brat seem loveable. Her monotone voice didn't help, but even throwing in workroom interactions with Ru about her son just didn't really do anything to lift her public opinion. The season-long drama with her was pretty entertaining but did nothing to portray her in a good light: she spent many workrooms singing loudly and intentionally trying to unnerve the other competitors, she fought with Tatianna in Untucked and had other queens like Pandora and Jujubee gunning for her on the main stage. Even head judge (at the time) Merle Ginsberg was actively campaigning for her to be eliminated, going so far to say she had a 'stank attitude'.

0R7MIjqAPL4

Post-show is where it gets more interesting of course: there's the time she announced that Morgan McMichaels had died, there's the time she threatened to bomb Drag Con, there're the times she told fans to kill themselves on Twitter, the time she leaked Tatianna's phone number, the time she pretended to not know who Sasha Velour is, the time she compared Raja to Abu from Aladdin, the time she threw a burger at a waiter and attacked Pandora & Tatianna for corroborating the story, the time she threatened to sue RuPaul and World of Wonder... I suspect we'll have another 20 instances before Season 13 is out.

I am fully at peace with the idea that too many gays absolutely idolise this form of reality TV contestant and thrive off of such negativity and violent hostility, so will lap all of this up with fervour, but maybe I'm just a boring old queer who thinks such people are just...assholes.

And finally, no write-up about the show's most talked-about winner would be complete without her reaction to winning. Raven and RuPaul also get a shout out for the absolutely MARVELLOUS drama (at about 4:15).

maS-x17woEQ

Tyra deserved the win, but as Jujubee said: she was always just UNT.

Memorable quote(s): "Maybe next time I will sing and maybe she'll [Tatianna] wear another horrible dress like she got on now." is a hell of a clapback :clap1:
Best Runway(s): Definitely her eleganza for the Ball at top four.
Best Moment(s): Copying Raven's reaction to winning an award at the DIVA Awards and embellishing it with an "I didn't even know I was nominated!!! :shocked:" :love:
Tearing off Raven and Jujubee's wigs in the 'Jealous of My Boogie' music video challenge :love:

[RileyH]

"Maybe next time I will sing and maybe she'll [Tatianna] wear another horrible dress like she got on now."

:love:

Tyra :love:

[Shaun]

https://media.giphy.com/media/3HELXAsmdThoICjNwf/giphy.gif
64th Place: Miz Cracker (Season 10) - finished 5th

Going into Season 10, Cracker was one of the clear frontrunners and a queen who'd accrued a huge amount of buzz and fan following before she'd even cast. Prior to Soju, the belief was that a queen who was already popular before being cast would end up doing pretty well: Aquaria went on to win, Aja has become a Drag Race staple despite a poor first showing, and even veterans like Willam, Chad and Raja ended up not losing much shine in their seasons. The difference with Cracker is: what fans find hilarious on YouTube is pretty often not what translates well to television, and as a result Season 10 was effectively like watching a woman who thinks she's hilarious, struggle to come to terms with her mediocrity.

It started promisingly: her Drag on a Dime almost won and she quipped an excellent fisting joke. Unfortunately, the other queens started to pull away quickly and the very idea that 'Miz Cracker' would be the comedy queen in a cast that included Yuhua, Monique, Monet, Eureka and Asia was just obviously dead in the water. This was a season that - like most recent seasons - was pretty generous in its opportunities for comedy: the Bossy Rossy episode saw Cracker again come pretty close to victory but was - again - outperformed by Eureka and Monique. Her Snatch Game was completely forgettable and a perfect example of her stay on Drag Race: overthought, pretentious and with such an overwhelming sense of entitlement that largely went ignored. Her supposed witticisms and put-downs ("I'm sat between a Grown Woman and an overgrown woman") were much like newspaper comic taglines: something that might prompt a smirk but nothing more. There was also Breastworld, where, despite being one of only seven remaining, she again fell flat and the laughs fell to Aquaria, Monet and Asia.

Even some of Cracker's supposed highlights were questionable: I will fight anyone to the death who believes that she should have been Top 3 in the Climate Change Ball. That hair-bikini and a basic astronaut helmet? Over Mayhem's Ice Queen and Martian alien? No ma'am. Heresy. The only challenge she won involved making over the YouTube personality that wasn't the most socially-awkward trainwreck and it helped that he (Chester See) camped it up and became a Marilyn Monroe-singing bimbo to sell it, because otherwise Asia was waiting to take that win with her hand-stitched god-jackets :oh:

I set out writing this thinking "Shaun, you've placed her in the top half of your ranking. Why? Must be some positives." and right now I'm drawing a blank! Her personality was often jarring and embarrassing (making weird, vague threats to Asia O'Hara for calling her "not a star" at the Reunion; half-assedly slamming her glass in Untucked when Vixen was being Vixen) and I guess I just can't understand why she was the fan ****ing favourite at all!

I place her this high because she's obviously somewhat polished and has potential? I guess? But don't colour me surprised if she bombs All Stars too. Season 10 was fantastic and absolutely none of the reasons it was include Miz Cracker.

Memorable quote(s): "I just did a look that I know for a fact that [Aquaria] has never done: it's called "being on top"." - after one good placement in Week 1. Worked out well huh?
Best Runway(s): 100% the one she made in Week 1 with the sad makeup that Aquaria supposedly copied.
Best Moment(s): Doesn't really involve her but the scream-laughing that Monique & Vixen do whilst hugging each other, after the reading challenge where Monet's read for Cracker is: "Miz Cracker, you coin yourself as thin, white and salty but you forget bitter! Bitter because you are a NYC queen that ha to **** Bob the Drag Queen to get to the top." :lovedup: honestly scream every time I see that clip.

[Black Dagger]

The definition of basic.

**** Tyra Sanchez as well.

[TomC]

wasn't a cracker fan. her performance to asia at the reunion was EMBARRASSING.

"NOT. NEXT TIME. BITCH". She really thought she was doing something :yuk:

[Daniel-X]

Cracker fell so flat and her reaction to Aquaria winning tops off why I don’t like the bitch.

[Smithy]

Oof y’all gonna be so mad when Cracker wins AS5

[Shaun]

Imagine such a thing happening when Shea, Asia and Peppermint are in the running

[Smithy]

All 3 of those are set to be sent home in shock eliminations by Tammy brown

[Shaun]

https://i.gifer.com/FQGO.gif
63rd Place: Dida Ritz (Season 4) - finished 5th (technically 6th since Kenya was brought back but Kenya sucked so **** off)

This is where the knockouts start to hurt: I loved Dida Ritz in season 4. She was the most down-to-earth, effortlessly fun and charismatic queen that unfortunately got sidetracked by an incredibly strong cast (well, Sharon/Chad/Latrice/Willam/Phi Phi anyway). Her talking heads are almost always great, and she put in a couple of good performances.

She's seen as something of a Drag Race joke, though, and is often referenced by queens on later seasons (Courtney Act calls Joslyn Fox the "Dida Ritz of season 6" as a metaphor for her supposedly coasting; there are repeated references to Dida's thirsty wigs) and it's hard to vehemently deny all criticisms of her. She would eventually be sent home for refusing to take part in politics, and that pretty much summed up her problem: she was too shallow and surface-deep of a queen to really take to heart or even take seriously. Something of a fence-sitter in Untucked, too, poor Dida was often literally in the middle of some of the show's nastiest and most hostile environments. Other challenge lowlights include her weird CD advert as a housewife who makes vague allusions to her husband being hunky or whatever, her shaky voice in the Frenemies challenge with Chad Michaels, and her runways did indeed often leave us uh...underwhelmed.

But she definitely has a far harsher reception than she deserved: she stole the scene in the Tuckahoe prison sitcom challenge, and could easily have won had Latrice not pulled off an all-time classic moment. She played a great bimbo in the Wrestling challenge, and her Snatch Game as Wendy Williams was pretty good too but sadly interrupted by childish antics from Jiggly, Phi Phi and Kenya. We also have to mention the greatest individual lipsync of all time and it's STILL Dida, I won't hear any talk of Manila's MacArthur Park.

Zlc-_NXWano
I think only the live Kitty Girl performance gave me the same level of pure, unbridled joy and awe that I felt seeing this for the first time. :lovedup:

Nowadays she's part of the same Chicago scene as The Vixen and Shea Coulee, and regularly pops up in the Black Girl Magic events, so I would be more than interested to see how she's evolved and matured since Season 4. Season 4 still counts, I think, as one of those early seasons where queens were too naive and unaware of themselves, and Dida definitely has more depth than the ditsy girl who wanted to be Carrie Bradshaw in her entrance look.

Memorable quote(s): "Latrice Royale. You're free now, you don't have to rock the yard-sandals any more. :)"
"Baby, you were born this way. :unsure: You were born... you were born this way :umm2:" re: Milan's final disastrous lipsync :love:
Best Runway(s): Has to be her gold corset she lipsynced in, but I do have a soft-spot for that Float Your Boat look even if the t-shirt was stained :worry:
Best Moment(s): Obviously the 'This Will Be' lipsync, but I will throw in a vote for her refusal to play to stereotypes in the Dragazines challenge. Talking at length about how she's uncomfortable eating fried chicken or watermelon in public, whilst Latrice and Jiggly cackle :love:

[Shaun]

https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/94sHlrncOTgWdVK-0zBbRfbBbddhpTCxbsepUyuVQWzmvHKtiPZsX6f8NXfqhqli4l Ot3hJwtnWrh9xaWWe2OcF4BMqhdWEy_prSFM6tnvMu6G7KNPqC bLWzU-SPpEkWpfSnBv4X
62nd Place: Kameron Michaels (Season 10) - finished 3rd (I guess 'joint 2nd' but come on she wasn't ahead of/level with Eureka)

Look, everyone liked Kameron Michaels. She was a sweet and understated queen with a ridiculously attractive out-of-drag appearance that was very much the underdog to support in a cast full of loudmouths and confidence.

I'm placing her this low because she just...really didn't do that amazingly at enough challenges. In her favour, we have the Cher musical in which she was the only queen (bar Monet X Change and, at a stretch, Eureka) who put in a solid performance. Her Chyna at Snatch Game was decent but only really remembered for Aquaria's Melania Trump quip about the country. And she did a solid job at all of the design challenges, but I still didn't really see the hype with her Climate Change Ball looks. The wintry one was a little bit too much with the makeup (but cool, anyway) and the martian expedition girl was just... a bodysuit with a walkie talkie? :shrug: Otherwise I only really remember Kameron doing well in the Pharmarusical. I know fans lapped up her verse in 'American' but I found her voice shaky and the words pretty...bland.

It's just there are, on balance, more moments that Kameron struggled with. She landed in the bottom three weeks in a row for a one-note acting performance in Breastworld, an ineffective twins makeover, and that bizarre good vs. evil challenge where she didn't actually do that badly but was lazy with her idea to just use the outfit she brought for a Prehistoric Runway that wasn't used (see also: Aquaria and Miz Cracker in the same challenge. THAT is why Asia and Eureka weren't bottom two :oh: stupid stans). This run of bottom placements sadly wasn't the only time Kameron struggled: she did a pretty disastrous job of acting in the Fibstr advert (I get war flashbacks every time I remember the joke she tried to tell, "unless you're into that :hugesmsile: hehehHEHhehhe :hugesmile:"

Don't misconstrue this placement for me hating Kameron Michaels: I have no hate for her. Her lipsyncs were absolutely incredible and she deserved to make the final. It's just... she's one of those queens that don't really prompt a huge emotional reaction from me, good or bad, and as a result she winds up in a relatively safe and comfortable placement :shrug: I look forward to a future Allstars appearance, though.

Memorable quote(s): "I believe that's...doable." (the Trade mini-challenge) :joker:
Best Runway(s): I mean, this is a landslide obviously but her Feathered Runway was breathtaking and unarguably one of the greatest of all time. :flutter:
Best Moment(s): The hair-shakes in the 'New Attitude' lipsync vs. Eureka. I know it was a double-shantay, and deserved to be, but god damn she went for blood :clap1:

[Smithy]

Kameron would have definitely been 2nd in that lipsync, god knows why ru did a double shanty’s between her and Eureka when Kameron wiped the floor with her, (although IA Eureka shined a lot more in the season)

[RileyH]

finished 3rd (I guess 'joint 2nd' but come on she wasn't ahead of/level with Eureka)

I know it was a double-shantay, and deserved to be

um

[zrc]

Tbf it was kinda obvious why it was a double shantay. They wanted Sharon Needles drag daughter going against a Michaels and an O'Hara like momma did.

[Shaun]

Time to kick out someone major for the ratings x

[Daniel-X]

Kameron was ****e, bitch be GONE

[Shaun]

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61st Place: Valentina (Season 9, All Stars 4) - finished 8th, 7th respectively

Oh... I think the fandom's fascination with Valentina was pretty much when I began to become jaded with the show and who it's being catered to. All of these claims - often by Valentina herself, in the reunion for instance - that she was representing a community that didn't get much representation when there have literally been queens with the talent of Yara Sofia, Alexis Mateo, Jessica Wild, Nina Flowers and Roxxxy Andrews was just the tip of the iceberg of Valentina Delusions that just quickly grew tiring in both seasons she appeared on.

We'll start with Season 9: her shock elimination is indeed one of the most controversial of all time (I'd still say Willam's was a bigger gag, though) and an iconic moment in the show's history, but none of it painted Valentina in a good light. Failing to learn the lipsync words and neglecting to paint under her mask just showed her up to be a shoddy performer and someone too cocky. It's this precociousness that I find the most unlikeable about Valentina: much of season 9, and even more of All Stars 4 featured her trying to hog the airtime. Shaving her eyebrows mid-season and wearing a headwrap to accentuate it; pretending to pray to a candle every night; entering the workroom singing opera. It just all got a little tiring.

Not that I am oblivious to her talents: she was funny at Snatch Game with a handful of Miss Universe references that were pretty smart. She did well in the 9021Ho and Drag cheerleading episodes, winning the latter, and she also pulled off a great sidekick in the Princesses challenge. "Hate...everyone."

It's just... there were also a lot of dud moments. She was obviously sent home for the sitcom challenge, failing miserably to prepare for the filming with anything close to resembling a script with Nina Bo'nina Brown, and I will still argue to this day that her Lady Gaga runway was BASIC AS HELL and a party city wig!

Allstars came along and many had her down to definitely make the top four - myself included - which made her flailing performances all the more surprising. Her roast is a trainwreck, hell, both of her roasts are a trainwreck. She danced pretty underwhelmingly in the talent show. And her Snatch Game as Eartha Kitt was convincing in voice but just...didn't have any jokes. She had two decent moments with the Jersey Justice and Girl Groups episodes, but otherwise the Valentina we expected to resurface at All Stars 4, after so notably turning All Stars 3 down to hone her craft, was just... a complete let down. And the telenovela editing in her favour did NOT mask that.

I will say, however, that I absolutely came in my pants over the Into You lipsync. Monique Heart screaming in the background throughout is basically me:

AzXTfTyDlTI

Memorable quote(s): Eureka: "Round is my favourite shape." Valentina: "I can see :)"
Farrah: "What ISN'T true?" Valentina: "Farrah Moan... just shut up already."
"Stoning really does feed my soul :("
"I'd like to keep it on, please."
"But with her Aaliyah outfit, the fit of that pant? Is not okay. That is so disrespectful towards Aaliyah. How dare you."
Best Runway(s): Hard decision, but it's a toss-up between her white runway (that gorgeous wedding dress) or her Madonna one.
Best Moment(s): I absolutely got my life from the dramatic intro to one episode, where Trinity rips off her censored-boob strap from her Madonna runway and Valentina is just screaming. **** it, here's the clip.

HZdwMDmfuEA

[Smithy]

I didn’t expect Valentina to be too high because I know you don’t like her, but not even top 50?

https://media.tenor.com/images/0bed11e3f812d929f625017d1eadfe79/tenor.gif

As soon as she left AS4 it became boring and yall know that that’s true

[Shaun]

yes I'm sure it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Manila was thrown under the bus in the very next episode x