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View Full Version : Something really awful happened yesterday 21.2.2019...


Calderyon
22-02-2019, 09:42 AM
On 20.1.2019, My precious Big Brother, aged 42 years at that time, caught a lung fever which turned to flu/influenza, which ended him up in the hospital emergency ward, first to the containment area, then to the normal one.

After 30 days of lying in bed battling and various things happening and problems emerging with his lungs (including a hole in the large intestine which was sewn blocked and then they put a ostomy/stoma on his stomach) and apparently with his kidneys, since they had to have a dialysis machine with him we still thought that everything would go right somehow as the doctors and nurses reassured us we were always making progress.

However his lungs were too weak to breath on his own and he had a respiratory tube in his throat (trakeostomy) to help him breath as well as every medicine available pumped to him to make him recover. His lungs infection levels were dropping due to the medicine, and rising and the dropping again, all the way to 10, but his lungs were still too damaged and weak to breath on their own (Have to mention that he was an avid smoker). They had tested this on multiple occasions. The weak state of his lungs caused the main problem... his heart started to fail as he was having cardiac arrhythmia, first just one and then nothing in a while, then they started to come more often and often and often, but we still thought everything would be alright and he would recover as we were reassured .

On the day of 21.2.2019 at approximately 8:00 PM Local time (6 PM UK), a doctor called and said that the cardiac arrhythmia´s had increased and that they had to resuscitate him in order for him to stay alive and thing are critical, but they are trying everything they can to save him.

At approximately 12 AM midnight (10 PM UK), they called for me and my father to come to the hospital cause apparently the end is near. We managed to get my uncle to come and take us there and my other big brother took a cab cause he was living farther away.

We arrived to hospital and had doctor fill us in and then we went to where my brother was in and sat around him and realized things were in a gloomy state. After over an hour or so, with all of us pleading and trying get him to fight as well as praying to god etc. his situation just worsened and worsened and then at approx. 2 AM (12 AM UK), my big brother couldn´t fight any longer and... passed away. We still tried to get the nurses and doctors to try one time to save him and tried to talk to him several times, but it was no use... he was gone. Nothing was to be done anymore.

My precious Big Brother who i love so much had died at the age of 43. On the night following his birthday (his birthday was on 20th of February) 21.2.2019 was the date he slept away calm.

Leaving everyone of us in deep grief, distress, misery, agony and longing. I miss him so, so much already and am in a misery.

I don´t know... what to do anymore. Everything seems completely pointless at the moment. I just want to cry and rage. I´m at a loss.

Barry.
22-02-2019, 09:46 AM
I'm so sorry Calderyon for your loss. You have people here to talk to if you need.

Cherie
22-02-2019, 10:05 AM
Omg Cald, I am in tears after reading that, so sorry its really hard to know what to say, grief is devastating especially when someone so close is taken so suddenly, thinking of you and your family at such a time of great sadness

SherzyK
22-02-2019, 10:08 AM
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss Cald. I know words aren’t enough but just know that there’s people on this forum you can talk to, including myself and that you’re never alone. May God make it easy for you in this tragic time and I hope you find peace soon. And I know it’s cliche, but I’m always here for you. :love:

Oliver_W
22-02-2019, 10:10 AM
</3

thesheriff443
22-02-2019, 10:18 AM
Try to stay strong not only for yourself but your family and the memories and love for your brother.

It’s going to be hard as you were given hope and had hope that he would recover, wish I could take your pain away, your forum family are with you!.xx

T*
22-02-2019, 10:30 AM
I’m so so sorry calderyon, that’s awful :(

Babayaro.
22-02-2019, 10:38 AM
Omg, that's so sad Cald

Stay strong :love:

Tony Montana
22-02-2019, 10:54 AM
I’m truly devastated to hear about your loss, Cald

My deepest, deepest condolences to you and your family

Ant.
22-02-2019, 11:09 AM
Calderyon :love: I'm sorry for your loss, stay strong :hug:

RileyH
22-02-2019, 11:14 AM
Cald :( RIP to your brother :(

arista
22-02-2019, 11:19 AM
Sorry for your loss

Lostie!
22-02-2019, 11:21 AM
So sorry to read this Cald :sad:

Mokka
22-02-2019, 11:27 AM
Oh Cald </3
Thank you for sharing your grief with us. You are much loved on here by many for many years now, and here you have many sympathetic and caring ears to share and vent to. I'm deeply sorry for your loss, and I dont think there is anything I can say to you to make it easier. Know you are in my thoughts and heart today, and if there is any words that can be shared going forward, by you or me, to easy your sadness... my pm box is always open.

Niamh.
22-02-2019, 11:29 AM
I'm so sorry Calderyon :hug:

Morgan.
22-02-2019, 11:30 AM
I'm so sorry Cald, this is horrible :(

Natalie.
22-02-2019, 11:56 AM
I'm so sorry Cald :hug: :love:

LukeB
22-02-2019, 11:57 AM
</3 Cald! I'm so sorry for your loss, always here if you need to talk :love:

hijaxers
22-02-2019, 12:06 PM
Oh my gosh Cald i really felt your pain reading your account of what a very hard time you have been having ,losing people you adore is so very very hard and I as we all do here send our deepest condolences to you and your family.
You will all need each other for support and we are always here for you in your hard days ahead.

I have just lit a candle in memory of your brother.

AnnieK
22-02-2019, 12:07 PM
I am so sorry to read this Cald. I lost my mum still quite young 4 years ago after a short illness which took hold very quickly and so I know how you must be feeling now. Cry if you want, rage if you want, let your emotions go and just feel how you want to feel at the time. Everything will be bleak at the moment and for some time to come. Remember your brother before he was ill, talk about him, try to think of the good times, the times he made you laugh etc etc but most of all look after yourself. Much love xx

Epic.
22-02-2019, 12:08 PM
That's really sad, let us know if you need any support</3

Wizard.
22-02-2019, 12:48 PM
That's heartbreaking Cald :( He seems like he was a great brother to you and someone who you could look up to. My sincere condolences, and I'm sure everyone here wishes you and your family some comfort in this time of grief :love:

Crimson Dynamo
22-02-2019, 12:52 PM
Heartbreaking news Caldy. Its going to a hard time for you coming up and no mistake. Only time will make things gradually better. Condolences to you and your family.

Eddie.
22-02-2019, 01:04 PM
Oh dear Cald sorry for your loss :(

You can take all the time you need to recover from this, we'll always be here ready if you need someone to chat to.

Stay strong. :love:

Kazanne
22-02-2019, 01:37 PM
So,so sorry to hear the sad news,nothing will make things better for you ,time will heal,but you will never forget,he will live forever in your heart.BIG hugs for you x

Moniqua
22-02-2019, 01:38 PM
:(

</3

reece(:
22-02-2019, 01:41 PM
Sorry to hear of your loss Cald, the forum is here for you if you need us

Smithy
22-02-2019, 02:03 PM
That’s awful :sad: sorry to hear of your loss

Matthew.
22-02-2019, 04:03 PM
That’s absolutely heartbreaking to read, Cald, RIP to your brother and I’m always here if you want to talk </3

Twosugars
22-02-2019, 04:28 PM
Cald :hug: :sad:
I'm sorry for you and your family
nothing I can say will make it better, it is a tragedy he died so young
find strength in memories and family to get through
feel free to vent to me over a pm if you want

JerseyWins
22-02-2019, 05:59 PM
Really sorry to hear that Cald :( So sad right now, RIP to him </3

thisisdanny
22-02-2019, 06:51 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this Cald! </3

We're all here for you x

DouglasS
22-02-2019, 07:21 PM
Really sorry Cald. Sending you my best wishes

LaLaLand
22-02-2019, 07:23 PM
So sorry for your loss xx

Strictly Jake
22-02-2019, 07:25 PM
I'm sorry to hear that keep strong together as a family xx

Mystic Mock
22-02-2019, 07:29 PM
I'm so sorry for your loss Calderyon.

Just remember you can talk to any of us on here at any time that you need us.

Amy Jade
22-02-2019, 07:37 PM
Oh no Cald I am so sorry to hear this, you are do brave to share and be so frank about your feelings.

Lots of love to you and the rest of your family, be strong and take care of each other xxx

Greg!
22-02-2019, 08:26 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this Cald :( Thinking of you xx

LemonJam
22-02-2019, 08:37 PM
I'm so sorry mate. Thank you for sharing with us.

It may sound corny, but I always think when people are no longer with us they always live on in our memories.

Take care.

MTVN
22-02-2019, 11:29 PM
:love:

Marsh.
22-02-2019, 11:30 PM
Wow, sorry to hear this Cald. :love:

Thoughts with you and your family.

Josy
23-02-2019, 11:13 AM
Aw Cald :hug: I'm so sorry to read about your loss, there's nothing anyone can do or say to make you or your family feel any better at this time but just know you always have people you can talk to on here if you feel it will help.

Thinking of you and your family :love:

Elliot
23-02-2019, 12:21 PM
:hug:

Daniel-X
23-02-2019, 01:03 PM
:(

Sending you and your family all my love x

Calderyon
08-03-2019, 04:01 PM
Thank you everyone for your kind messages and best wishes.

Still on coping stage as his Funeral event was held today. Hopefully it starts to get easier now.

Tony Montana
08-03-2019, 04:02 PM
Thank you everyone for you kind messages and best wishes.

:hug:

Crimson Dynamo
08-03-2019, 04:03 PM
Thank you everyone for you kind messages and best wishes.

How are you Caldy, how is the family?

Calderyon
08-03-2019, 04:04 PM
How are you Caldy, how is the family?

On grieving stage still. We'll cope or at least try to. It's very hard, but we have to manage.

Cherie
08-03-2019, 04:04 PM
One day at a time Cald xxx

AnnieK
08-03-2019, 04:06 PM
Thinking of you.....as Cherie said, take each day as it comes xx

Crimson Dynamo
08-03-2019, 04:08 PM
On grieving stage still. We'll cope or at least try to. It's very hard, but we have to manage.

Yes, keep on keeping on and it will get better

bots
08-03-2019, 04:27 PM
****, i've only just seen this. So sorry to hear this Caldy

caprimint
08-03-2019, 05:30 PM
This is so sad, sorry to hear that. RIP to your brother. :(

hijaxers
08-03-2019, 06:35 PM
To say today has been very distressing would be putting it mildly as you really know they are gone and it hits hard.

Like others are saying its a minute , an hour, a day at a time, be close to those around you and talk about him often . Happy memories mean so much and stay with you forever.

Calderyon
14-03-2019, 03:47 PM
Finished clearing up my Bros apartment today with my father, uncle and cousin.

Tony Montana
14-03-2019, 03:49 PM
Finished clearing my Bros apartment today with my father, uncle and cousin.

Aww that's heart-breaking

Stay strong Cald :hug:

Calderyon
14-03-2019, 03:55 PM
Aww that's heart-breaking

Stay strong Cald :hug:

Thank you... I will try.

Twosugars
14-03-2019, 04:14 PM
Cald :hug:

Cherie
14-03-2019, 04:18 PM
Tough day for you and your family Cald

Niamh.
14-03-2019, 04:22 PM
That must have been really hard Cald, thinking of you :hug:

RileyH
14-03-2019, 06:25 PM
cald :love:

hijaxers
14-03-2019, 06:32 PM
Finished clearing up my Bros apartment today with my father, uncle and cousin.

Very emotional times and many memories get awakened . Hope you are coping with your family to get through this very difficult time.