View Full Version : Could you be in a relationship with someone who...
Smithy
25-08-2020, 02:12 PM
Earns a considerable amount more than yourself? Or would you feel uncomfortable in that sort of situation?
I was talking to a friend about it and although in theory I think I could do it, when it came to stuff like gift giving or anything like I’d always feel like it was never enough.
What do we all think? :pipe:
The Slim Reaper
25-08-2020, 02:15 PM
Yeah, of course. It's money not a worldview.
Crimson Dynamo
25-08-2020, 02:21 PM
how much is the difference
like one earns 50K a year and one earns 250k?
Kizzy
25-08-2020, 02:24 PM
Yep in a heartbeat..
Marsh.
25-08-2020, 02:28 PM
Of course. And I'd be extra nice on paydays.
user104658
25-08-2020, 02:28 PM
In a long term relationship it becomes irrelevant, or should, in my opinion. You share resources :shrug:.
Smithy
25-08-2020, 02:30 PM
how much is the difference
like one earns 50K a year and one earns 250k?
I don’t know we were just talking hypothetically but sure let’s say that
Marsh.
25-08-2020, 02:31 PM
In a long term relationship it becomes irrelevant, or should, in my opinion. You share resources :shrug:.
You'd be surprised. I know couples who literally battle over money beyond splitting the bills/mortgage 50/50.
When, as you say, if you're intending to be with that person for life, have kids etc it shouldn't really matter.
Smithy
25-08-2020, 02:33 PM
You'd be surprised. I know couples who literally battle over money beyond splitting the bills/mortgage 50/50.
When, as you say, if you're intending to be with that person for life, have kids etc it shouldn't really matter.
Yeah I think pride would come into play too, I always like to pay my fair share
My mum and dad have always been very much what’s mine is yours regardless of who has been earning more at any one time (atm they both pretty much earn the same) and I’d hope to carry that on into a long term relationship of my own so yeah.
Tom4784
25-08-2020, 02:36 PM
I don't think it would bother me, tbh. I don't really understand how it could bother anyone.
caprimint
25-08-2020, 02:40 PM
Yes because money doesn't define a person
Niamh.
25-08-2020, 02:42 PM
Of course
AnnieK
25-08-2020, 02:42 PM
Earns a considerable amount more than yourself? Or would you feel uncomfortable in that sort of situation?
I was talking to a friend about it and although in theory I think I could do it, when it came to stuff like gift giving or anything like I’d always feel like it was never enough.
What do we all think? :pipe:
When my friend left uni....her and her then fiance both got jobs and she earned about 3x what he did and a lot of their friends earned more so they always set limits on things like gifts, nights out etc so he wouldn't feel bad. Years later when they split he threw it back in her face and said he felt belittled by her and their friends making an issue out of the fact that he earned less than they did. He didn't complain at the time though :laugh:
Liam-
25-08-2020, 02:48 PM
The idea obviously sounds nice, but in reality I’d probably feel like a scrounger if they paid for things all the time and whatnot
The Slim Reaper
25-08-2020, 02:51 PM
When my friend left uni....her and her then fiance both got jobs and she earned about 3x what he did and a lot of their friends earned more so they always set limits on things like gifts, nights out etc so he wouldn't feel bad. Years later when they split he threw it back in her face and said he felt belittled by her and their friends making an issue out of the fact that he earned less than they did. He didn't complain at the time though :laugh:
You mean people drag up any old crap in a breakup?
Mystic Mock
25-08-2020, 03:04 PM
Why would I care?:laugh:
...I guess if it was flipped the other way, you wouldn’t not get into a romantic relationship with someone who earns considerably less../...I’m sorry, I can’t live you, your salary just isn’t high enough...:laugh:..?...for me and I think for many...it’s always been an equal ‘contribution’ in terms of percentage of income...
Liam-
25-08-2020, 03:42 PM
...I guess if it was flipped the other way, you wouldn’t not get into a romantic relationship with someone who earns considerably less../...I’m sorry, I can’t live you, your salary just isn’t high enough...:laugh:..?...for me and I think for many...it’s always been an equal ‘contribution’ in terms of percentage of income...
I’d prefer to be the one earning more, or who has more money in general, idk, I love treating people and I hated being treated it makes me feel weird :laugh:
Cherie
25-08-2020, 03:43 PM
Mr C and I have always shared what we earned, he earned more once we had kids as he worked full time, thinking about who paid for what is not healthy imo, if you are both happy with the arrangement then it wont be an issue, but then it depends on the people involved, if one is a spender and the other is tight with money it could lead to issues
I’d prefer to be the one earning more, or who has more money in general, idk, I love treating people and I hated being treated it makes me feel weird :laugh:
...you can still treat the people you love, though...gifts and treats are not about what they cost, they’re about the thought put into them and how inventive that can be on very little money as well...?...I know that sounds corny, Liam...but it is true...I love giving someone the most ‘perfect’ gift, not the most ‘expensive’ gift...
I’d prefer to be the one earning more, or who has more money in general, idk, I love treating people and I hated being treated it makes me feel weird :laugh:
..I’m awkward about receiving expensive gifts as well, well most gifts, actually...thats why the cost isn’t the thing...the thoughtful ones, though...?...I feel less awkward because I just feel so touched by it...
Yes, my husband earns a lot more money than I do, it doesnt bother me.
We share everything and always have for over 20 years so theres no his or mine it's just 'ours' we obviously have separate bank accounts as well as joint accounts but I have a card for his personal account too :hee:
Amy Jade
25-08-2020, 07:03 PM
I kind of already do, my boyfriend has his own business and earns considerably more than I do on a carers wage.
Withano
25-08-2020, 07:07 PM
I couldn’t sign those marriage papers any faster
Mokka
26-08-2020, 01:35 AM
My friend and I were discussing this last night. She won't move in with her boyfriend because he owns the house and she still rents. I thought that was a weird stance to take. She said if they equally paid rent she would have no problem. She's finishing her Masters and he has an established job.
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