Would you intervene?

[Kate!]

if you saw someone getting harassed or assaulted verbally or physically in public would you intervene? Would you step in or call the police?

I witnessed a couple arguing recently in the supermarket. Well I say arguing but actually it was more haranguing of her by him. He was shouting in her face. Took her phone and dropped it on the floor. I felt so sorry for her and she was looking at me. He stormed off and I said can I help? She said no its OK and scurried after him. I saw them again at the checkouts. He had calmed down and was unloading the shopping as if nothing had occurred. I hope she gets rid of him the sod.

[Marsh.]

Should have battered him with your brolly.

[Kate!]

Should have battered him with your brolly.

Should have rammed him with my trolly ha. X

[bots]

i've intervened a couple of times when individuals were being beaten up. Looking back on it, it was so risky and I certainly wouldn't do it now. In my experience the police keep well out the way until the fighting's done and then pick up the pieces, so phoning them isn't much use

[GoldHeart]

Problem is even of you try to help, you get told "mind your own business" , but I would say if you think someone is in danger then maybe ask if they're ok or if it's worse than that get help / call police. But depends on the situation. You also have to be careful .

[Alf]

I saw something the other day about a hand sign which is a Worldwide signal for letting people know that they're in danger.

[Cherie]

No, generally people do not like others interfering in their business, and more so if it is a couple

[Toy Soldier]

If I saw someone being physically attacked and there was an obvious physical mismatch and they looked at real risk of injury then yes I'd step in.

If it's verbal I think unfortunately you can actually make things worse by trying to intervene. If you know who the person is (e.g. let's say its a neighbour our someone from your local area) then I personally think you should try to get some info to them about where they can go for help.

[AnnieK]

I was driving home one night and a girl looked like she was getting a beating from I assume her other half. I stopped my car and shouted over to ask if she was.ok....she told me to **** off and then ran at the car like a maniac. I've never bothered trying to help again.

[GoldHeart]

I was driving home one night and a girl looked like she was getting a beating from I assume her other half. I stopped my car and shouted over to ask if she was.ok....she told me to **** off and then ran at the car like a maniac. I've never bothered trying to help again.

See what I mean :rolleyes: , sometimes that's the reaction.

[Toy Soldier]

I was driving home one night and a girl looked like she was getting a beating from I assume her other half. I stopped my car and shouted over to ask if she was.ok....she told me to **** off and then ran at the car like a maniac. I've never bothered trying to help again.Drugs are a hell of a drug Annie.

To he fair, as Uni students me and my now-wife were having a BLAZING drunken argument on the way home from the union and some people started shouting out a window of the student accommodation (to take the piss, not concerned citizens) and in s bizarre synchronised move, we both immediately turned our combined rage on them :joker:. It was... Colourful :umm2:. Laughed all the way home, woke up the next day full of such shame...... Ahh simpler times.

[GiRTh]

It depends. I saw a bloke shouting at his kid the other day and threatening to hit him. If he had I hope to think I'd have said something but if its a couple then no chance . They can knock the crap out of each other for all I care. :shrug:

[GiRTh]

I was driving home one night and a girl looked like she was getting a beating from I assume her other half. I stopped my car and shouted over to ask if she was.ok....she told me to **** off and then ran at the car like a maniac. I've never bothered trying to help again.:laugh::laugh:

Sounds oddly familiar. I'd have let them get on with it.

[Josy]

If I saw someone getting physically attacked/hurt I would try but not in the case or similar to what's described in the OP, if it's a verbal disagreement between a couple theres a pretty good chance they would both turn on you and then you're the bad one

[joeysteele]

If I saw someone getting physically attacked/hurt I would try but not in the case or similar to what's described in the OP, if it's a verbal disagreement between a couple theres a pretty good chance they would both turn on you and then you're the bad one

In line with this for myself too.

Unless one was calling for help.
Or if it looked dangerously bad.
Then if I felt I could assist I would or call the Police.
At times that's a waste of time sadly.

It's very tricky, as you say Josy, as I've come across exactly this.
Where someone has tried to intervene and offer assistance, only to get them shouted at with very choice language too.

[Beso]

Yeah...

I was walking home one night and came across a couple where the woman's face was covered in blood and she was crying..so i smashed the living **** out the bloke, gave him a right good seeing to..

I think they are still married to this day though.

[Kazanne]

Lets not forget 38 people passed James Bulger who was distressed, had they intervened he may still be here ,I can understand they were hoodwinked into thinking he was their brother etc, but he was seen been dropped and kicked ,I think in the light of that I would have to intervene ,as for adults not so much so unless I felt one was in real danger.

[Nicky91]

no not step in since i'm physically weak and i don't want to be assaulted myself

maybe i'll seek up a secure location and call the police instead, maybe

[Niamh.]

Lets not forget 38 people passed James Bulger who was distressed, had they intervened he may still be here ,I can understand they were hoodwinked into thinking he was their brother etc, but he was seen been dropped and kicked ,I think in the light of that I would have to intervene ,as for adults not so much so unless I felt one was in real danger.

Oh I didn't know that, I knew some people had seen him but not seen them do that to him. It could have turned out so differently had someone intervened :(

[Toy Soldier]

When it comes to kids, I don't think I could turn a blind eye/walk away and actually live with it to be honest. I'm not talking shouting or even a "spank" - which I disagree with on a personal level, but it's not over the line where intervening would be necessary, I just tend to make hard eye contact and glare :umm2:. But if I saw someone properly beating a kid I wouldn't be able to leave it. For one, I'd record it, second I'd call the police. Whether I'd step in physically depends really - I would if it looked like they were going to seriously injure them or worse. I'd also be more likely to intervene physically if it was a male :shrug:.

The last bit goes for adults too, really. I'd only be tempted to physically intervene if it looked like someone was going to end up seriously injured or dead, unless it was a friend. In fact the only serious physical fights I've been in in my life (and I can count them on one hand) were defending other people. What a hero :joker:.

[arista]

if you saw someone getting harassed or assaulted verbally or physically in public would you intervene? Would you step in or call the police?

I witnessed a couple arguing recently in the supermarket. Well I say arguing but actually it was more haranguing of her by him. He was shouting in her face. Took her phone and dropped it on the floor. I felt so sorry for her and she was looking at me. He stormed off and I said can I help? She said no its OK and scurried after him. I saw them again at the checkouts. He had calmed down and was unloading the shopping as if nothing had occurred. I hope she gets rid of him the sod.

Yes I would intervene.

[Ammi]

...if a felt a child was in danger, I could never not intervene...with little James, that was such a disturbing part...but some have had to live with that throughout these years...

[Ammi]

...I intervened once with something physical, it was such a long time ago and I’m a similar size to a sparrow...after the incident, I had many panic attacks about it/what could have potentially happened etc...thing is when you’re a lot younger, you often don’t feel the same sense of danger or caution...I don’t think that my actions would be the same now...

[Toy Soldier]

...if a felt a child was in danger, I could never not intervene...with little James, that was such a disturbing part...but some have had to live with that throughout these years...

I think a lot of it will have been because of the age of the boys. If it had been two adult men, or even two older teens, I think people would have been more immediately concerned. They might even be more concerned now BECAUSE of this case. But basically before it happened... I would guess people just could never have imagined that two children could do something so violent. It really was unprecedented, both before and since. I guess people would assume it was brothers and have thought "that's terrible" but not that he was at any real risk, let alone his life being in danger.

[Niamh.]

...I intervened once with something physical, it was such a long time ago and I’m a similar size to a sparrow...after the incident, I had many panic attacks about it/what could have potentially happened etc...thing is when you’re a lot younger, you often don’t feel the same sense of danger or caution...I don’t think that my actions would be the same now...

I remember years ago, myself and Gav were in town after a night out and this couple were arguing, they were on some steps and he pushed her so hard she almost flew up in the air and off the steps straight on to the back of her head, I was terrified, thankfully there was lots of people around at the time to get her help but i still think about it to this day, i hope she was OK

[Cherie]

Lets not forget 38 people passed James Bulger who was distressed, had they intervened he may still be here ,I can understand they were hoodwinked into thinking he was their brother etc, but he was seen been dropped and kicked ,I think in the light of that I would have to intervene ,as for adults not so much so unless I felt one was in real danger.

That is a great point Kaz, I think for me it would depend, not couples as generally it doesn't turn out well, but kids, or someone vulnerable, Libby Squires could also potentially have been saved if someone had intervened and got her home

[Ammi]

I think a lot of it will have been because of the age of the boys. If it had been two adult men, or even two older teens, I think people would have been more immediately concerned. They might even be more concerned now BECAUSE of this case. But basically before it happened... I would guess people just could never have imagined that two children could do something so violent. It really was unprecedented, both before and since. I guess people would assume it was brothers and have thought "that's terrible" but not that he was at any real risk, let alone his life being in danger.

...yeah, the level of ‘intent and evil’ in what they did was something that was unimaginable...I mean, difficult to imagine in adults, but these were children...although I have to say in the many years of working and being involved with safeguarding and social care etc...?...the majority of cases have been child on child abuse...

[Ammi]

I remember years ago, myself and Gav were in town after a night out and this couple were arguing, they were on some steps and he pushed her so hard she almost flew up in the air and off the steps straight on to the back of her head, I was terrified, thankfully there was lots of people around at the time to get her help but i still think about it to this day, i hope she was OK

...that’s kind of a thought that would be hard to leave you...wondering if she was ok as she fell onto the back of her head...that’s so terrifying to have witnessed...

[Kazanne]

Oh I didn't know that, I knew some people had seen him but not seen them do that to him. It could have turned out so differently had someone intervened :(

Yes and the witnesses feel real guilt now ,but it's all well and good in hindsight, they aren't to blame I guess, just the evil little fookers that did it.One woman actually stopped them as james was upset and had a mark on his head,and she wanted to take him to the police station as it was nearby,the boys insisted he was their brother so she left it at that,imagine how that poor lady feels now.

[Toy Soldier]

I remember years ago, myself and Gav were in town after a night out and this couple were arguing, they were on some steps and he pushed her so hard she almost flew up in the air and off the steps straight on to the back of her head, I was terrified, thankfully there was lots of people around at the time to get her help but i still think about it to this day, i hope she was OK

I think the worst I've seen was outside my (old) workplace, group of guys were beating up a young guy. They had started to walk off but the guy got up and started taunting them again :umm2: and they all rounded on him, kicked him to the ground right outside our door and were basically jumping on his head... the girl I was working with was on the phone to 999 in a panic and a couple of the guys had picked up a bottle and a brick and were turning back towards the guy, a group of my customers (who all had their noses pressed to the window watching) ran out the door and grabbed them thankfully, think I basically came seconds from witnessing a murder :/.

[edit] Should say my shop wasn't even down some dodgy back-alley or anything - this was right in the centre of town, in the middle of a sunny afternoon :omgno:

[Niamh.]

I think the worst I've seen was outside my (old) workplace, group of guys were beating up a young guy. They had started to walk off but the guy got up and started taunting them again :umm2: and they all rounded on him, kicked him to the ground right outside our door and were basically jumping on his head... the girl I was working with was on the phone to 999 in a panic and a couple of the guys had picked up a bottle and a brick and were turning back towards the guy, a group of my customers (who all had their noses pressed to the window watching) ran out the door and grabbed them thankfully, think I basically came seconds from witnessing a murder :/.

[edit] Should say my shop wasn't even down some dodgy back-alley or anything - this was right in the centre of town, in the middle of a sunny afternoon :omgno:

omg that sounds horrific.

Oh I was thinking about your comment yesterday about self defense classes and how effective they would be in a real situation and my first thought was about this guy in my son's gym, now granted he's a 2 time world champion heavy weight amateur MMA fighter and has just signed a contract with Bellator to become professional. I have no idea what the guy was thinking when he went for him, I can only put it down to the fact that even though he's a big guy, he looks like he might be quiet, he doesn't look like a tough guy if that makes sense? Anyway, he was in a pub with his g/f and this guy just walks up to him and head butts him, he barely flinched because he's used to getting hit, he just grabbed the guys face and smacked him into a wall. The Police arrive and ask him if he wants to press charges and he just laughs and says Nah look at the state of him :laugh:

[Crimson Dynamo]

I saw this couple have a right slanging match in Tesco, they were effing and jeffing and about 2 inches apart, faces red and eyes bulging.

Id had enough, i marched straight over and said "excuse me can i just reach past you for the mozarella? thanks"

Id already got the penne and the sauce so i wasn't having any of it

:oh:

[Niamh.]

I saw this couple have a right slanging match in Tesco, they were effing and jeffing and about 2 inches apart, faces red and eyes bulging.

Id had enough, i marched straight over and said "excuse me can i just reach past you for the mozarella? thanks"

Id already got the penne and the sauce so i wasn't having any of it

:oh:

:laugh2:

[Toy Soldier]

omg that sounds horrific.

Oh I was thinking about your comment yesterday about self defense classes and how effective they would be in a real situation and my first thought was about this guy in my son's gym, now granted he's a 2 time world champion heavy weight amateur MMA fighter and has just signed a contract with Bellator to become professional. I have no idea what the guy was thinking when he went for him, I can only put it down to the fact that even though he's a big guy, he looks like he might be quiet, he doesn't look like a tough guy if that makes sense? Anyway, he was in a pub with his g/f and this guy just walks up to him and head butts him, he barely flinched because he's used to getting hit, he just grabbed the guys face and smacked him into a wall. The Police arrive and ask him if he wants to press charges and he just laughs and says Nah look at the state of him :laugh:

People do it to prove something to themselves I think. I sprouted early and was over 6' at 13 and I swear, up until about 15 the number of kids who picked fights at school (not real fights, just "wrastling"/play-fighting but those scraps can get pretty rough :joker: ) with me just because I was the biggest was ridiculous! I remember one particularly short kid literally jumping up and down trying to slap me once and I caught him in mid air and carried him like a baby, he was so mad :laugh: :laugh:. We ended up more or less the same hight by the end of school, too... there's just those weird couple of years in the middle where some kids shoot up to be a foot taller than others.

[Niamh.]

People do it to prove something to themselves I think. I sprouted early and was over 6' at 13 and I swear, up until about 15 the number of kids who picked fights at school (not real fights, just "wrastling"/play-fighting but those scraps can get pretty rough :joker: ) with me just because I was the biggest was ridiculous! I remember one particularly short kid literally jumping up and down trying to slap me once and I caught him in mid air and carried him like a baby, he was so mad :laugh: :laugh:. We ended up more or less the same hight by the end of school, too... there's just those weird couple of years in the middle where some kids shoot up to be a foot taller than others.

Yeah maybe that's it, you usually think of these guys as people who try to bully weaker people though I guess

[Beso]

I've added a new photo of a screen shot of a convo I had with my nephew on his first day back in Scotland two weeks ago.