Do you have social-media loyalties?

[Redway]

And by that I mean if you’re as courteous (or appropriately-ratchet) with people online in the same way that you are in person and if you’d have the back of, ‘say,’ a casual forum buddy or likeable Facebook poster in the same way you would a casual vis-à-vis buddy.

[Mystic Mock]

I'll always try to have my friends back, whether it be online or irl.

However if it's proven that they've done something really heinous then they've lost me as a friend.

[Gusto Brunt]

I'm loyal online but often if my loyalties and contributions aren't reciprocated or appreciated, I tend to ditch people who I think take my presence for granted.��

[Josy]

I'm just the same :shrug:

Infact one of my nephews has been posting aimed statuses (not at me) and no one ever pulls him up on it and it's getting repetitive and embarassing so I called him out on yesterday and the cheeky little bam deleted my comment :hee:

[Redway]

I’m loyal to the people I’m loyal to (loyal as in actively looking out for them) but otherwise I’m just someone who posts and I am a bit petty when it comes to stuff like people randomly unfollowing me on Instagram (especially if they still try and view your stories to get access to your daily/weekly tidbits). I obviously unfollow right-back unless their stories are that interesting to me and I do hide stories from people who do the parenthesised bits. Either buckle-up and sign up for the full deal if you were already willing to do that at one point or let’s just not acknowledge each other’s virtual presence. At all.

[Crimson Dynamo]

appropriately-ratchet

what does that mean?

[Redway]

In other words the more ghetto/unpolished form of courteous (meaning ‘hey, you alright, there?’ would become ‘wag-wan; how’s it sliding, gyal/brudda? Stay blessed, yh?’).

[Redway]

I'm just the same :shrug:

Infact one of my nephews has been posting aimed statuses (not at me) and no one ever pulls him up on it and it's getting repetitive and embarassing so I called him out on yesterday and the cheeky little bam deleted my comment :hee:

Teenagers do say all sorts of embarrassing things on social media, to be fair. That’s why I don’t think prospective employees should use stuff like that as a yardstick for vocational suitability unless the stuff they’re posting really is that defamatory and it’s definitely them posting it.

[Cherie]

I'm just the same :shrug:

Infact one of my nephews has been posting aimed statuses (not at me) and no one ever pulls him up on it and it's getting repetitive and embarassing so I called him out on yesterday and the cheeky little bam deleted my comment :hee:

what are aimed statuses?

[bots]

i don't interact on social media outside of a work context

[Crimson Dynamo]

i used to laugh at my dads "phone voice"

:laugh:

[MTVN]

I barely understand anything in this thread

[Crimson Dynamo]

I barely understand anything in this thread

The title is wholly misleading


I think its do you change your personality depending on what social media you use?

[Niamh.]

what are aimed statuses?I'm guessing those kind of ones that are clearly about a particular person without actually naming them so kind of like :

"Sick of doing favours for ungrateful people who are always too busy when you need help"

[Crimson Dynamo]

I'm guessing those kind of ones that are clearly about a particular person without actually naming them so kind of like :

"Sick of doing favours for ungrateful people who are always too busy when you need help"

typical Josy

:hehe:

[Niamh.]

typical Josy



:hehe:[emoji28]

[Redway]

I'm guessing those kind of ones that are clearly about a particular person without actually naming them so kind of like :

"Sick of doing favours for ungrateful people who are always too busy when you need help"

Slightly off-topic but that’s an actual bug-bearer of me. I always try and be accessible in some form to give help to whoever needs it (not necessarily financially all the time but just in general) but some people will literally come to you about something when they need help and then disappear. You can’t even get them to respond to a single message that isn’t directly-related to whatever it is they need help with.

[Redway]

I'll always try to have my friends back, whether it be online or irl.

However if it's proven that they've done something really heinous then they've lost me as a friend.

Yeah, I hear you. Sometimes it’s easier to befriend someone online after so long if it had been in your head up until then that they were some sort of weirdo based on fleeting interactions they were put in where they didn’t really feel that comfortable in in the first place (coupled with the fact that people like that are some of the types who express themselves much more openly online than in-the-flesh). Some people still live in the dark ages about them even when it’s obvious that they’ve become cool (even assuming that they were ever anything but cool) and choose not to accept their F.b. requests/follow them on Insta. but ultimately that’s their loss. The internet’s a good place to connect with people from all walks of life and that includes people you vaguely-knew from back in the day who you might’ve thought were a bit weird (not necessarily heinous by any means) for whatever biased, strange reason. When ostracism of ‘person X’ (or at the least people just ignoring them because they don’t remember them seeming interesting to them in person) becomes old news and so-2007 (or whatever), it’s old news. I’m the last person to let face-to-face misunderstandings and mistreatments carry over online years and years and years later. People evolve.

[Josy]

what are aimed statuses?Like posting insults and comments on fb clearly directed at someone but not naming the person

[Beso]

I'm just the same :shrug:

Infact one of my nephews has been posting aimed statuses (not at me) and no one ever pulls him up on it and it's getting repetitive and embarassing so I called him out on yesterday and the cheeky little bam deleted my comment :hee:

You hit the hurt spot.:dance:

[Beso]

Yeah, I hear you. Sometimes it’s easier to befriend someone online after so long if it had been in your head up until then that they were some sort of weirdo based on fleeting interactions they were put in where they didn’t really feel that comfortable in in the first place (coupled with the fact that people like that are some of the types who express themselves much more openly online than in-the-flesh). Some people still live in the dark ages about them even when it’s obvious that they’ve become cool (even assuming that they were ever anything but cool) and choose not to accept their F.b. requests/follow them on Insta. but ultimately that’s their loss. The internet’s a good place to connect with people from all walks of life and that includes people you vaguely-knew from back in the day who you might’ve thought were a bit weird (not necessarily heinous by any means) for whatever biased, strange reason. When ostracism of ‘person X’ (or at the least people just ignoring them because they don’t remember them seeming interesting to them in person) becomes old news and so-2007 (or whatever), it’s old news. I’m the last person to let face-to-face misunderstandings and mistreatments carry over online years and years and years later. People evolve.



What a load of horse****. Youve dug LT out for no reason thaelast 2 weeks...so I would therefore pop you up at the 1st person...certainly not the past

[Mystic Mock]

Yeah, I hear you. Sometimes it’s easier to befriend someone online after so long if it had been in your head up until then that they were some sort of weirdo based on fleeting interactions they were put in where they didn’t really feel that comfortable in in the first place (coupled with the fact that people like that are some of the types who express themselves much more openly online than in-the-flesh). Some people still live in the dark ages about them even when it’s obvious that they’ve become cool (even assuming that they were ever anything but cool) and choose not to accept their F.b. requests/follow them on Insta. but ultimately that’s their loss. The internet’s a good place to connect with people from all walks of life and that includes people you vaguely-knew from back in the day who you might’ve thought were a bit weird (not necessarily heinous by any means) for whatever biased, strange reason. When ostracism of ‘person X’ (or at the least people just ignoring them because they don’t remember them seeming interesting to them in person) becomes old news and so-2007 (or whatever), it’s old news. I’m the last person to let face-to-face misunderstandings and mistreatments carry over online years and years and years later. People evolve.

You make some good points.

In particular about being friends with people online that you wouldn't even look at twice irl, it can be fascinating who is really close with who when you take all of the smoke and mirrors away.

[Redway]

What a load of horse****. Youve dug LT out for no reason thaelast 2 weeks...so I would therefore pop you up at the 1st person...certainly not the past

I’ve never met L.T. in the flesh though (and he hasn’t actually caused any grief in the past couple of days, surprisingly to the contrary). I think the context is just.a wee-bit different.

[Redway]

You make some good points.

In particular about being friends with people online that you wouldn't even look at twice irl, it can be fascinating who is really close with who when you take all of the smoke and mirrors away.

Mhm-hm. But the thing is so many people (especially the more socially-introverted/reserved) show far more of their true selves online/in writing in general than in spoken conversation in-the-flesh so sometimes being close to someone online means that you really are authentically-close to them. For a number of reasons (some of which are actually perfectly-healthy, if a little bit of a nuisance when it comes to concrete self-assertion and things like that) some people just don’t show much of their true colours to anyone in-person (and if they do the other person has to be extremely, extremely close to them for that assertive comfort to even begin to materialise in the flesh) so rely on the Internet to get their social feed and connections. I don’t think anything’s wrong with it, tbh.

[Cherie]

I'm guessing those kind of ones that are clearly about a particular person without actually naming them so kind of like :

"Sick of doing favours for ungrateful people who are always too busy when you need help"

Like posting insults and comments on fb clearly directed at someone but not naming the person

What a load of horse****. Youve dug LT out for no reason thaelast 2 weeks...so I would therefore pop you up at the 1st person...certainly not the past

Aw right got you

[Redway]

I'm loyal online but often if my loyalties and contributions aren't reciprocated or appreciated, I tend to ditch people who I think take my presence for granted.��

Yeah. I hear that. Face-to-face interactions of all kinds (from the irrelevantly-mundane to the deeply-personal 2.a.m. conversations with your bestie/s) come and go and they’re a daily bread-staple (however you feel about them) but when you’ve got some free say over how you initiate communication (as you do online) I’m the sort of person who takes that as an opportunity to at least try and build meaningful connections (down to the word) and make people feel a bit more understood or enriched for connecting with me. If you move with a madness to me for no reason or spew prejudices (that someone of any active moral stance is obviously going to check) on the Internet I’m not going to be that nice in return but the way my [online] loyalties do manifest is in the sense of treating people online with (at least) the same appropriate level of confidential respect as I would if we were friends in person if we’re not already and not wasting both of our time(s) by gaslighting them and their capabilities or passing unnecessary judgements. I won’t form a negative opinion on someone online if I don’t feel a reason to and in a world where it feels like so much time gets wasted just going through the wet humdrum of life and interacting with people you wouldn’t actually interact with if you had it your way (cranky Harley-and-Karen-bosses inc.) I’m not going to now waste time bringing negative energy and unwarranted judgements to the table over WhatsApp, F.b. or Insta. and draining someone else’s energy/making them feel inadequate for reasons which really wouldn’t be anything to do with anyone other than me (in connection with my particular purview of experience). I know the web’s an inexpensive space but interpersonally there’s no time to waste (unless you actually have a reason to dislike the person).

[Redway]

I'm guessing those kind of ones that are clearly about a particular person without actually naming them so kind of like :

"Sick of doing favours for ungrateful people who are always too busy when you need help"

I understand where aimed statuses come from if it gets the message across to people you wouldn’t actually speak to/want to hang out with in physical time and no-one other than the people who need to see it have access to it. Some people do need to be called out in some capacity.

[Niamh.]

I understand where aimed statuses come from if it gets the message across to people you wouldn’t actually speak to/want to hang out with in physical time and no-one other than the people who need to see it have access to it. Some people do need to be called out in some capacity.

meh either say it or don't say, this half arsed guess working of who you're talking about is annoying and honestly that kind of airing your dirty laundry on Facebook stuff is cringey as **** imo

[GoldHeart]

I barely understand anything in this thread

I'm glad I'm not the only one, at first I thought this was about something else.

[Redway]

meh either say it or don't say, this half arsed guess working of who you're talking about is annoying and honestly that kind of airing your dirty laundry on Facebook stuff is cringey as **** imo

True but some people use platforms like Instagram (or maybe even Facebook) to call people out to a selected audience of people who it might be relevant to rather than just broadcasting everything openly. That I can understand (and I’m not going to pretend I haven’t done that myself) but I agree that the public statuses along the lines of ‘omg I work in the worst warehouse in the world, can’t believe the morning I’ve had with dis cheeky manager’ are cringeworthy.

And even when all’s said and done and you do call people out discreetly-enough there’s no guarantee that they’re actually going to acknowledge what they’ve done and not gaslight you over it so sometimes it’s just more trouble than it’s worth. Some things are better left unsaid and unwritten.

[Niamh.]

When it's about real life people or family members I mean

[bots]

i think the fewer opportunities people have to fight/argue on social media the better. I would much prefer it to concentrate on being an information service rather than a vehicle for confrontation

[Redway]

When it's about real life people or family members I mean

It’s often about toxic ‘friends’/acquaintances who end-up being big-time gossipers/back-stabbed and the like. When it’s like that you’re often trying to avoid any more face-to-face contact with them (which is usually incredibly awkward in the first place once or if you get a bad feeling about someone) but I guess there are still means to get the message to them indirectly without necessarily plastering it in the broad open for everyone to see. There’s always the option of just messaging the person to say your ‘peace’ but sometimes people want a certain number of witnesses to see what they’re like or see what the full story really is.

Anything to do with family has no business being plastered on social media like that. I’ve never understood people who make family-business the public’s business.