View Full Version : I will Never Understand Men
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 03:51 PM
I know both men & women do this.
But I will never understand why a bloke will be talking to you every day, and then out the blue disappear. Weirdly he's still around but isn't speaking :suspect::conf: .
It's going on for 4 days now with nothing ,I know he had personal stuff to sort out or so he reckoned. But if that's the case why was he still around & online?? , makes no sense.
Niamh.
11-10-2022, 03:58 PM
Someone you were seeing?
Cherie
11-10-2022, 04:00 PM
People can be more than strange, but ghosting is probably one of the worst things that can happen to someone
If it was someone you're seeing, it's likely to be 3 reasons.
1.He's not interested anymore and either doesn;t have the balls to tell you, or he doesn't wanna hurt you.
2.He might want to see how much you like him, and hoping you chase him (men do this a lot, it's silly)
3.He might just generally be down and want his space.
Mystic Mock
11-10-2022, 04:07 PM
People can be more than strange, but ghosting is probably one of the worst things that can happen to someone
I always remember that Youtuber that ghosted her dying fan, absolutely awful that was.
With the particular situation that GoldHeart is in, does he suffer with bad mental health?
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:08 PM
Someone you were seeing?
Sort of ..but not really ,it was more a friends having drinks type thing. But we seemed to get on . He use to contact me everyday.
He did say last week he was busy with stuff & personal issues,but if that's the case ... then why still go online. I'm not entirely convinced.
Cherie
11-10-2022, 04:11 PM
Can you contact him online GH? If so I would just drop him a message asking him if he has sorted himself out and if he is up a meet...at least you will know where you stand then if the doesn't respond
Niamh.
11-10-2022, 04:11 PM
Sort of ..but not really ,it was more a friends having drinks type thing. But we seemed to get on . He use to contact me everyday.
He did say last week he was busy with stuff & personal issues,but if that's the case ... then why still go online. I'm not entirely convinced.
I don't miss that dating scene/trying to figure that stuff out! Usually your intuition will be right though in these situations
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:13 PM
If it was someone you're seeing, it's likely to be 3 reasons.
1.He's not interested anymore and either doesn;t have the balls to tell you, or he doesn't wanna hurt you.
2.He might want to see how much you like him, and hoping you chase him (men do this a lot, it's silly)
3.He might just generally be down and want his space.
If it's number 2 . Then he can forget it , I was tempted ..but I'm not making a fool of myself .
I hope it's 3. But he's still going online, and of he was genuinely going through stuff & busy , surely he wouldn't have time to go online. Or maybe I'm being too harsh ..but I have a feeling he's got bored & is talking to other people instead :rolleyes: .
If he has time to go online ..then it takes 2 minutes to send me a quick message explaining :shrug: ... surely.
I don't really want to put too much personal stuff on here ,but I think he's influenced by relatives around him. But I told him at the time that he's an adult who can make his own choices surely :shrug:.
The Slim Reaper
11-10-2022, 04:14 PM
Arista does that to everyone at some point, GH. He's too much of a player to be tied down, unfortunately.
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 04:17 PM
If it was someone you're seeing, it's likely to be 3 reasons.
1.He's not interested anymore and either doesn;t have the balls to tell you, or he doesn't wanna hurt you.
2.He might want to see how much you like him, and hoping you chase him (men do this a lot, it's silly)
3.He might just generally be down and want his space.
Or
4. He's met someone else.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:17 PM
Arista does that to everyone at some point, GH. He's too much of a player to be tied down, unfortunately.
LOL
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:19 PM
I always remember that Youtuber that ghosted her dying fan, absolutely awful that was.
With the particular situation that GoldHeart is in, does he suffer with bad mental health?
Re: mental health ..I really don't want to speculate tbh , he sort of joked about the spectrum. But I think that's to be taken with a grain of salt.
How do you know hes been online?
Niamh.
11-10-2022, 04:21 PM
The bottom line is, if he is interested, he will contact you, I wouldn't chase him
Mystic Mock
11-10-2022, 04:21 PM
Re: mental health ..I really don't want to speculate tbh , he sort of joked about the spectrum. But I think that's to be taken with a grain of salt.
Hopefully you're correct.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:22 PM
Or
4. He's met someone else.
This is what I think , or he's enjoying talking to other people. But if that's the case why not just tell me.
We actually we're supposed to meet up again,he cancelled originally due to his personal stuff & busy stuff.
But He seemed happy to reschedule ... strangely today probably would have been the day we met up again. But he hasn't been in contact for 4 days.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:26 PM
How do you know hes been online?
Because he still uses a dating site,and I think he still checks his .com email inbox,he also easily gives out his mobile number aswell.
Cherie
11-10-2022, 04:30 PM
This is what I think , or he's enjoying talking to other people. But if that's the case why not just tell me.
We actually we're supposed to meet up again,he cancelled originally due to his personal stuff & busy stuff.
But He seemed happy to reschedule ... strangely today probably would have been the day we met up again. But he hasn't been in contact for 4 days.
oh, so you were supposed to meet, he cancelled and then went off grid, I would say delete his profile in that case
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:31 PM
Can you contact him online GH? If so I would just drop him a message asking him if he has sorted himself out and if he is up a meet...at least you will know where you stand then if the doesn't respond
I have several ways to contact him Cherie, but I really don't want to be that girl who runs after a guy saying "ohh where are you" ," what happened " etc :rolleyes: .
I know I keep ranting, but it just feels hypocritical of him as he himself told me.... he got ghosted by a girl he was going to meet before me :facepalm: .
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 04:31 PM
This is what I think , or he's enjoying talking to other people. But if that's the case why not just tell me.
We actually we're supposed to meet up again,he cancelled originally due to his personal stuff & busy stuff.
But He seemed happy to reschedule ... strangely today probably would have been the day we met up again. But he hasn't been in contact for 4 days.
He honestly seems like a waste of time ~ probably done this to others sadly.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 04:44 PM
He honestly seems like a waste of time ~ probably done this to others sadly.
I know this sounds a bit like pot kettle black as I'm sharing on here ,but from what he told me after our first meet up ... He basically over shared at home about stuff . And he was told not to meet me again, he made out he wasn't paying attention to that...but I don't know.
I think he gets swayed easily , he told me he thought I was pretty & a nice person ..but he knew we had different interests, I agreed with him but I told him he's an adult who can make his own decisions,and we got on as friends. But what's weird is he still kept contacting me, until 4 days ago.
Crimson Dynamo
11-10-2022, 04:53 PM
They have got a better offer
Cherie
11-10-2022, 05:32 PM
I know this sounds a bit like pot kettle black as I'm sharing on here ,but from what he told me after our first meet up ... He basically over shared at home about stuff . And he was told not to meet me again, he made out he wasn't paying attention to that...but I don't know.
I think he gets swayed easily , he told me he thought I was pretty & a nice person ..but he knew we had different interests, I agreed with him but I told him he's an adult who can make his own decisions,and we got on as friends. But what's weird is he still kept contacting me, until 4 days ago.
Was it cultural? The family telling him not to see you again
Tbh if he is overly influenced by his family it is probably for the best
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 05:42 PM
Was it cultural? The family telling him not to see you again
No , but his mother is critical. I think she's got high unrealistic expectations for him re: the perfect woman. He told me she acts like Hyacinth Bucket.
thesheriff443
11-10-2022, 05:50 PM
Gold heart he is taking you for a fool
Stop giving dicks like this the time of day , you are already making excuses for him and you barely know him.
You deserve better
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 06:00 PM
It's just I genuinely thought .. maybe something bad happened, so I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt . As he was going through stuff & he was also busy .
But now I think he's playing games,if he can still go online & check his emails / possibly talking to other girls ... Whilst blanking me.
I just don't understand ,he himself expressed his frustration with dating & how he'd been rejected for his height .And also how he'd been ghosted and messed around by women in the past . And now here he is ghosting me :bored: :conf:.
Cherie
11-10-2022, 07:18 PM
It's just I genuinely thought .. maybe something bad happened, so I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt . As he was going through stuff & he was also busy .
But now I think he's playing games,if he can still go online & check his emails / possibly talking to other girls ... Whilst blanking me.
I just don't understand ,he himself expressed his frustration with dating & how he'd been rejected for his height .And also how he'd been ghosted and messed around by women in the past . And now here he is ghosting me :bored: :conf:.
Ironic isn’t it
Niamh.
11-10-2022, 08:10 PM
Ironic isn’t itThat reminds me of something I saw posted on FB the other day, some guy giving out about how women are so shallow because he's short and fat and can't get a date but his good looking friends got all these hot girls even though the guys are aseholes, so this woman commented on his post asking him how many short, fat girls he'd asked out? He was really confused by the question.....[emoji3166]
No , but his mother is critical. I think she's got high unrealistic expectations for him re: the perfect woman. He told me she acts like Hyacinth Bucket.
Kate's his mom?
5...Is Warwick Davis making any films atm?
thesheriff443
11-10-2022, 08:27 PM
That reminds me of something I saw posted on FB the other day, some guy giving out about how women are so shallow because he's short and fat and can't get a date but his good looking friends got all these hot girls even though the guys are aseholes, so this woman commented on his post asking him how many short, fat girls he'd asked out? He was really confused by the question.....[emoji3166]
Love it .
Kate!
11-10-2022, 08:50 PM
Kate's his mom?
Is this supposed to mean me, or not? Not particularly amused.
Kate!
11-10-2022, 08:51 PM
Gold heart he is taking you for a fool
Stop giving dicks like this the time of day , you are already making excuses for him and you barely know him.
You deserve better
This. He's a waste of your time love.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 09:25 PM
This. He's a waste of your time love.
Yeah I'm realising that now, the funny thing is he was the one who pursued me in the first place, and suggested meeting up etc.
We've been talking about 6 weeks or so consistently ,and only met once. And he hasn't spoken for the past 4 days now.
I need to catch up on this, just got back from watching the football.
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 09:30 PM
Yeah I'm realising that now, the funny thing is he was the one who pursued me in the first place, and suggested meeting up etc.
We've been talking about 6 weeks or so consistently ,and only met once. And he hasn't spoken for the past 4 days now.
GoldHeart he's an A hole and if he reappears ~ tell him to kiss yours. He's a twat and its his loss.
The bottom line is, if he is interested, he will contact you, I wouldn't chase him
This 100%
Yeah I'm realising that now, the funny thing is he was the one who pursued me in the first place, and suggested meeting up etc.
We've been talking about 6 weeks or so consistently ,and only met once. And he hasn't spoken for the past 4 days now.
His loss. We have this weird thing as humans where we want someone who rejects us, and if/when we get them it's very meh.
Stay strong, you're a lovely person GH!
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 09:35 PM
This 100%
His loss. We have this weird thing as humans where we want someone who rejects us, and if/when we get them it's very meh.
Stay strong, you're a lovely person GH!
Totally agree with you Swan a very lovely person.
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 09:40 PM
GoldHeart he's an A hole and if he reappears ~ tell him to kiss yours. He's a twat and its his loss.
Lol Thanks, I'm wondering if I'll ever get a message again. And tbh I don't feel like replying if he does contact me again.
This 100%
His loss. We have this weird thing as humans where we want someone who rejects us, and if/when we get them it's very meh.
Stay strong, you're a lovely person GH!
That's sweet thanks :)
Totally agree with you Swan a very lovely person.
Thanks guys :wavey: , I guess a part of me wants closure. But this isn't the first time I've been ghosted. I guess I should be use to it , people are weird.
Mystic Mock
11-10-2022, 09:43 PM
They have got a better offer
You mean his playing for Birmingham City?
I promise everyone that's my Blues quota for the next 24 hours.:laugh:
Is this supposed to mean me, or not? Not particularly amused.
Ah come on kate, or is it hyacinth?
Just my way of a gentle tease to perk you up on TIBB x
GoldHeart he's an A hole and if he reappears ~ tell him to kiss yours. He's a twat and its his loss.
This.
Mystic Mock
11-10-2022, 09:45 PM
That reminds me of something I saw posted on FB the other day, some guy giving out about how women are so shallow because he's short and fat and can't get a date but his good looking friends got all these hot girls even though the guys are aseholes, so this woman commented on his post asking him how many short, fat girls he'd asked out? He was really confused by the question.....[emoji3166]
Some people are very blind when it comes to their own failings.
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 09:51 PM
Some people are very blind when it comes to their own failings.
Aww how right you are, i have a friend who's son is dating a ' fat girl ' cos she always has her tits hanging out and she's a goer ! How charming is that ? i've had to give arguing with her about it , as she lets them sleep together:fist:
Kate!
11-10-2022, 10:02 PM
Ah come on kate, or is it hyacinth?
Just my way of a gentle tease to perk you up on TIBB x
Well it bugs me. I'm nothing like Hyacinth.
Well it bugs me. I'm nothing like Hyacinth.
Kiss my arse.
Kate!
11-10-2022, 10:30 PM
Kiss my arse.
Kiss your own. I don't know where its been.
hijaxers
11-10-2022, 10:32 PM
Kiss your own. I don't know where its been.
:joker::joker::joker::joker: Making us chuckle :cheer2:
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 10:37 PM
:joker::joker::joker::joker: Making us chuckle :cheer2:
:laugh:
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 10:49 PM
He's also older than me ,I don't know if that plays a part in this . He even wanted to know my bday which I told him . Anyway I should stop going on about him I guess....but if I hear anything I'll probably update this thread. But I doubt I'll be replying to him.
Yeah you're gonna get hurt if you don't stop. But the more he rejects you, the more you're gonna want closure and reasons why.
STOP!
The path only leads to unhappiness and frustration!
GoldHeart
11-10-2022, 10:59 PM
Yeah you're gonna get hurt if you don't stop. But the more he rejects you, the more you're gonna want closure and reasons why.
STOP!
The path only leads to unhappiness and frustration!
Yeah I know this now :love:
Yeah I know this now :love:
We are all human, i went through it recently, it hurts. Allow it to hurt, then do you best to move on!!
thesheriff443
12-10-2022, 02:24 AM
Kate and parmy having a domestic
thesheriff443
12-10-2022, 02:29 AM
I would encourage people to talk about situations like this.
Mystic Mock
12-10-2022, 03:12 AM
Aww how right you are, i have a friend who's son is dating a ' fat girl ' cos she always has her tits hanging out and she's a goer ! How charming is that ? i've had to give arguing with her about it , as she lets them sleep together:fist:
It's a unique form of romance I'll say that.:laugh:
Tbf though if they're both happy together then well done to them.
Mystic Mock
12-10-2022, 03:14 AM
I would encourage people to talk about situations like this.
There's only so many ways I can describe a Tumbleweed on my love life.:laugh:
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 06:17 PM
OMG !!!
I don't even know where to begin , he's sent me a message :shocked: :facepalm: . 8 days later he's now Contacted me , I CANNOT even WOW ....
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 06:22 PM
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FirstMatureFawn-size_restricted.gif
Nobody leaves GoldHeart on read.
Seems like he's been keeping you in the back pocket in case other things didn't work out. Leave him well alone and ignore his messages.
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 06:25 PM
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FirstMatureFawn-size_restricted.gif
Nobody leaves GoldHeart on read.
Seems like he's been keeping you in the back pocket in case other things didn't work out. Leave him well alone and ignore his messages.
On a different note Dirty Dancing is one of my favourite movies :love: .
But seriously .....this bloke is something else, I was right he's been discussing me with his mother & apparently they argued about me :shocked: . And how he's been "having a think " .
Kate!
15-10-2022, 06:28 PM
Run a mile GoldHeart
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 06:29 PM
On a different note Dirty Dancing is one of my favourite movies :love: .
But seriously , this bloke is something else, I was right he's been discussing me with his mother & apparently they argued about me :shocked: . And how he's been "having a think " .
That sounds like bollocks. You need to be careful because it seems as though you like him, but seriously, just stay away. There is nothing good that will come from this.
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FirstMatureFawn-size_restricted.gif
Nobody leaves GoldHeart on read.
Seems like he's been keeping you in the back pocket in case other things didn't work out. Leave him well alone and ignore his messages.
:joker: BRILLIANT!!
But yeah, sound advice!
The more you ignore, the more frustrated he'll get. What goes around comes around, stay strong Goldy!
That sounds like bollocks. You need to be careful because it seems as though you like him, but seriously, just stay away. There is nothing good that will come from this.
Yep, agree with all that too tbh.
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 06:36 PM
Just to add, he hasn't been discussing you with his old Doris, either. It's an excuse.
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 06:36 PM
:joker: BRILLIANT!!
But yeah, sound advice!
The more you ignore, the more frustrated he'll get. What goes around comes around, stay strong Goldy!
I'm honestly speechless, unfortunately the stupid app has shown that I "viewed his page" a few times. I think he pays a membership to get notified :facepalm: damn it
As I don't pay a membership, therefore I can't actually see who's viewed me.
He also said he bets I'm angry at him
He wrote " bet you're angry with me * sad face* "
I feel like I'm being trolled
Kate!
15-10-2022, 06:41 PM
Ghost him.
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 06:42 PM
I'm honestly speechless, unfortunately the stupid app has shown that I "viewed his page" a few times. I think he pays a membership to get notified :facepalm: damn it
As I don't pay a membership, therefore I can't actually see who's viewed me.
He also said he bets I'm angry at him
He wrote " bet you're angry with me * sad face* "
I feel like I'm being trolled
https://media.tenor.com/HhqlzHe8tXsAAAAM/bulls-eye-anderson.gif
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 06:46 PM
Ghost him.
I AM
I don't even have the mindset to get into that , especially about his mother with him . The fact he thought it was necessary to gossip about me in the first place to her , already makes me gobsmacked tbh .
Can you imagine if the shoe was on the other foot and I did that to him , he's probably get offended.
Typical double standard bloke :bored: .
I just hate that I couldn't hide that I viewed his profile,he mentioned that in his message " oh I see you viewed me".
He's probably loving that .
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 06:48 PM
I AM
I don't even have the mindset to get into that , especially about his mother with him . The fact he thought it was necessary to gossip about me in the first place to her , already makes me gobsmacked tbh .
Can you imagine if the shoe was on the other foot and I did that to him , he's probably get offended.
Typical double standard bloke :bored: .
I just hate that I couldn't hide that I viewed his profile,he mentioned that in his message " oh I see you viewed me".
He's probably loving that .
It doesn't matter if he loved it, because you can stop playing his game any second you want. There is nothing to win or lose here. Just keep it moving.
It doesn't matter if he loved it, because you can stop playing his game any second you want. There is nothing to win or lose here. Just keep it moving.
This is why Slim get's all the crumpet.
Nah, seriously, Slim is right Goldheart. If you play into his hands it's just gonna hamper you. A downward spiral of hurt, disappointment and frustration.
Move on! He's the loser, not you.
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 07:01 PM
It doesn't matter if he loved it, because you can stop playing his game any second you want. There is nothing to win or lose here. Just keep it moving.
He also said " he's sorry he hasn't been in touch " & how he "hasn't forgotten me anything but "
He also went into a long regular essay , about his days & what he's been up to .
He said his mother has been slagging me off basically :shocked: .
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 07:06 PM
He also said " he's sorry he hasn't been in touch " & how he "hasn't forgotten me anything but "
He also went into a long regular essay , about his days & what he's been up to .
He said his mother has been slagging me off basically :shocked: .
And again, none of this matters. Drama is unnecessary in relationships, but drama before a relationship is a red flag holding another red flag which is waving a red flag.
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b2/0d/ed/b20dede3a322a5972d0853fea3de56d9.gif
Always avoid these type of red flags :smug:
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 07:13 PM
This is why Slim get's all the crumpet.
https://media.tenor.com/-hynWRx3efMAAAAC/nicole-richie-hair-flip.gif
The Slim Reaper
15-10-2022, 07:14 PM
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b2/0d/ed/b20dede3a322a5972d0853fea3de56d9.gif
Always avoid these type of red flags :smug:
At least it's not plastic, like Chelsea ones :smug:
At least it's not plastic, like Chelsea ones :smug:
OI, i was a Chelsea boy before the Roman Empire. And we still got 4th on your boys before Jose/Roman.
But yeah, Chelsea the OG's at buying the PL. Still, none of us will ever be as plastic as City, or 90's Utd :hehe:
Actually hope you lot win tomorrow.
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 07:28 PM
And again, none of this matters. Drama is unnecessary in relationships, but drama before a relationship is a red flag holding another red flag which is waving a red flag.
So true
I'm always the first person to look out for red flags if I'm honest 🚩🚩, so yeah he doesn't give me much confidence in him.
And I think we all have enough baggage to be taking on other people's. I'm not a teenager anymore.
Cherie
15-10-2022, 09:26 PM
The fact he mentions his mother so much is enough to make me run a mile...Norman Bates teas
In some ways it’s good you viewed his profile...now ignore...will drive him mad
Crimson Dynamo
15-10-2022, 09:29 PM
Im so drawn to the red flag
:drool:
dido teas
The fact he mentions his mother so much is enough to make me run a mile...Norman Bates teas
In some ways it’s good you viewed his profile...now ignore...will drive him mad
But Cherie, a Boy's best friend is his mother!
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 10:21 PM
The fact he mentions his mother so much is enough to make me run a mile...Norman Bates teas
In some ways it’s good you viewed his profile...now ignore...will drive him mad
Well he told me his Dad had passed , so I thought understandably he'd be closer to his mum now.
But the fact he's been gossiping about me ,and telling her everything ..is just too much & it's disrespectful. I now wonder if he shows her our messages aswell ,which would be weird .....and shows he can't be trusted.
And whatever I do or don't do ,it seems he'll always run back and tell her ,which is crazy.
And yeah I guess by viewing his profile, whilst ignoring him .. he'll know I'm not happy with him and it will either drive him mad or something .
The fact his mum by sounds of it has took an instant dislike to me without knowing me , shows he's been chatting away about me in details . The fact they argued about me is insane .
Mystic Mock
15-10-2022, 10:25 PM
OMG !!!
I don't even know where to begin , he's sent me a message :shocked: :facepalm: . 8 days later he's now Contacted me , I CANNOT even WOW ....
8 Days Later sounds like a Zombie flick.
Did he tell you what was going on? You don't have to tell me the exact details, but he should let you know what's going on.
Mystic Mock
15-10-2022, 10:28 PM
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/b2/0d/ed/b20dede3a322a5972d0853fea3de56d9.gif
Always avoid these type of red flags :smug:
:joker:
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 10:30 PM
8 Days Later sounds like a Zombie flick.
Did he tell you what was going on? You don't have to tell me the exact details, but he should let you know what's going on.
Maybe I should write a story called '8 days later ' lol
Yeah he sent a long essay message , I mentioned it in this thread ..if you look through . Basically he's had a big argument with his mum about me.
Mystic Mock
15-10-2022, 10:33 PM
Maybe I should write a story called '8 days later ' lol
Yeah he sent a long essay message , I mentioned it in this thread ..if you look through . Basically he's had a big argument with his mum about me.
It would probably make a good Movie tbf.
Tbh he sounds like a manchild if he is going to his Mother about your relationship with each other.
GoldHeart
15-10-2022, 10:39 PM
It would probably make a good Movie tbf.
Tbh he sounds like a manchild if he is going to his Mother about your relationship with each other.
He also made out I was still on his mind/ he hadn't forgotten me. And how he's sorry . And how his mum annoyed him as she was slagging me off.
And how he's also been so tired & busy ,yet every day I kept seeing him online on the dating site. If he was so tired & busy he would NOT be scrolling through dating sites:notimpressed: ,he must think I'm an idiot.
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