As a kid, did you grow up with both parents?

[Benjamin]

Made a poll (which won’t show who voted, as this is a bit more of a personal question some may not want to share too much about).

I grew up my mum, my father passed when I was 4 (they were still married).

[AnnieK]

Oh wow Ben, that's so young to lose your Dad. :love:
I grew up with both my parents at home....they were married for 44 years until my mum passed 10 years ago.

[Mystic Mock]

I was incredibly lucky.

Both of my parents were together throughout my life, until last year when my Mom passed away.

I'm sorry to hear about your Dad btw, Benjamin.

[Ammi]

…I grew up with both parents in the family home…I knew that you lost your father at a young sage, Ben…I’m so sorry that you felt that loss …:hug:…

[bots]

I had both parents together into adulthood. I always counted myself extremely fortunate

[Kate!]

Ahh, sorry Ben, very young to lose a parent. I was very lucky to have both till they passed away, my dad at 66, my mum at 72.

[Cherie]

Both parents though my Dad passed away when I was 15

[Kate!]

Both parents though my Dad passed away when I was 15

Ahh :hug:

[Mystic Mock]

Both parents though my Dad passed away when I was 15

I'm sorry to hear that Cherie.:hug:

[Cherie]

I'm sorry to hear that Cherie.:hug:

and for your loss Mock :hug:

[Livia]

So sorry for peoples' loss. I grew up with both parents. They are both here still and live just a walk away, and they're both very involved with my children. I consider myself very lucky.

[joeysteele]

Yes, I had both Parents growing up.
Have neither now however.

[Niamh.]

Both parents growing up were still married but tbh my mom may as well have been a single parent, my dad had little interest in us. They eventually divorced when I was 25

[MTVN]

Had both and know I'm very lucky to have had that and for them both to still be healthy and together now

They don't half bicker though

[Ammi]

Had both and know I'm very lucky to have had that and for them both to still be healthy and together now

They don't half bicker though

…healthy bickering is good for the soul, so they say…

[smudgie]

Had both parents living together until I was about 16.
They should have divorced years before they did, mother was a ruddy nightmare.

[Black Dagger]

Yeah both of my parents were together until I was 17 before they divorced so my whole childhood.

[Benjamin]

No need to be sorry those that said it haha, was many moons ago. But thank you.

I was more just curious/nosy. :laugh:

[Mystic Mock]

and for your loss Mock :hug:

Thanks Cherie.:wavey:

[Mystic Mock]

Yes, I had both Parents growing up.
Have neither now however.

If you don't mind me asking Joey.

Do you ever have something pop up on TV that reminds you of one of your parents?

Football is probably it for me, especially Blues and Man Utd matches as Blues was the team that my Mom supported, and Man Utd were the good team that she liked, so I immediately think of her whenever these two teams play.

[user104658]

Gosh that's a complicated question. They were both "there", I had a bit of a postcard upbringing at primary school age -- then my mum's mum died, she quite quickly descended into an alcohol problem and my dad was frankly quite absentee despite being literally right there. He might as well not have been the vast majority of the time, he was totally checked out as a parent/family member, other than paying the bills and putting food on the table. They stopped talking to each other (and I mean, entirely) when I was about 15, separate rooms etc, and finally actually split when I was 18. The atmosphere in that house was cold as ice and extremely lonely. My mum died when I was in my late 20's. I currently have basically zero contact with my dad (for a multitude of reasons).

So the answer I guess is, I lived in a house with two messy adult strangers who financially supported me - but I looked after myself emotionally from around the age of 9, and just looked after myself entirely for the mostpart from around the age of 11.

Being a parent to teens myself is both healing and sad -- because we're a very close family who talk and laugh about everything, all the time, are affectionate, know about each other's lives in detail and are interested... so I get to do a better job but at the same time it highlights that my own teens were fkn bleak.

So I don't have an easy answer really.

My early childhood was great. Later, both of my parents were "there", but neither of them were there.

[user104658]

Both parents growing up were still married but tbh my mom may as well have been a single parent, my dad had little interest in us. They eventually divorced when I was 25

I think our stories are similar Neem apart from my poor mum. I should really have been fairer in the above -- she loved us dearly and was very interested in our lives and loved to hear about what we were doing, but she was unfortunately simply not a functional adult (or to be blunt a functional person) and thus unable to be an active parent in any way. I blamed her for that for many years, I don't any more with some adult perspective, I just feel very sad about the way things went for her.

[Niamh.]

I think our stories are similar Neem apart from my poor mum. I should really have been fairer in the above -- she loved us dearly and was very interested in our lives and loved to hear about what we were doing, but she was unfortunately simply not a functional adult (or to be blunt a functional person) and thus unable to be an active parent in any way. I blamed her for that for many years, I don't any more with some adult perspective, I just feel very sad about the way things went for her.

And i should mention that luckily my mother was and still is an amazing woman, she's my absolute hero (so in that way i can sympathise with your mother and how profoundly she felt the loss of her own mother) , they split when i was 25 because my dad was having an affair with a woman 2 years younger than me (the same age as one of my brothers) which was just such a slap in the face to my mother, if anyone should have left or had an affair it should have been her really but of course she's a better person than that. Anyway, having said all that, I had a very good childhood too, I had a brilliant mother and 3 brothers who I'm very close to so I'm very thankful for that.

I am sorry to hear about your mother, alcoholism is such an awful addiction

[joeysteele]

If you don't mind me asking Joey.

Do you ever have something pop up on TV that reminds you of one of your parents?

Football is probably it for me, especially Blues and Man Utd matches as Blues was the team that my Mom supported, and Man Utd were the good team that she liked, so I immediately think of her whenever these two teams play.

Not really much Mock.

My Dad was mad about a TV series, Rumpole of the Bailey.
He had the videos of it
So when I see a repeat anywhere of that it brings him further to mind.

My Mum loved the soaps and actually Hollyoaks was her favourite of them.
She also was a fan of Man Utd because back in the 60s and 70s, she was a strong admirer of George Best apparently.

Those things do bring memories back.

[Mystic Mock]

Not really much Mock.

My Dad was mad about a TV series, Rumpole of the Bailey.
He had the videos of it
So when I see a repeat anywhere of that it brings him further to mind.

My Mum loved the soaps and actually Hollyoaks was her favourite of them.
She also was a fan of Man Utd because back in the 60s and 70s, she was a strong admirer of George Best apparently.

Those things do bring memories back.

That's definitely interesting.

I know that George Best was an exceptionally popular player back in the day, from the way that the older Football fans tend to speak about him nowadays.