elliebrew
30-07-2008, 05:19 PM
''''Rex and his ever-so helpful 'VT reviews' pushed me over the edge this year. I don't think it's healthy to feel this way about a game-show.
They're condemned by DNA to repeat the pattern forever. Exactly like I was last night, back in front of the livefeed, face squashed close to the screen, barking at a ginger gnome from Hampstead, 'Oi Rex? Why should you get a House visit from your dippy bird!? Why should you get reassurance that anyone on the outside world still loves you?!
Leave Rachel alone Rex! How come you're only vocal with the timid people in the House? Remember the night of Spitgate, Rex? Remember when Stuart, Dale, Darnell and Dennis were all squaring up for a fight? They were arguing over YOU Rex! Where was your razorsharp gob then?'
Of course when Rex did have cause to speak, not a single word was mumbled. It's almost like he knew that with stronger, more volatile people there's a good chance he might get flattened. But with girls like Rachel or Sara or Kat or Maysoon, it's 'happy days'. Rex can say what he wants to girls like this. I mean, literally anything he wants.
Kat looked fat in her video. Maysoon looked slutty. Sara isn't sexy. Rachel is the most boring housemate who he'd swap for scrabble. In fact, Rachel's a liar who cheated to get into the House by being bubbly in her VT tape. Actually, Rachel should get her makeup on the moment she wakes up so she's a bit more pretty like she was on her VT.
Rex has quacked on for days about the whole Rachel VT thing. He's obsessed with it. Rachel simply must face up to how much she's let herself, the House, the producers and the nation down. Oh, the shame Rachel! The shame!? Away and sob in the room with the giant bumhole on the door and think about the evil you have behest upon this country with your 'I'm a curvy girl' nonsense. BURN RACHEL RICE.
Of course, in reality, Rex couldn't give a flying crap about Rachel's VT. He's perfectly intelligent enough to know that the Big Brother audition process requires a certain amount of role-playing and showing off to survive each step. Who doesn't know that!? Away to the idiot step for you if you don't! I mean it. Go to the idiot step and sit with all the brainless people who believe that BB intro VT tapes aren't snappy caricatures.
You're in the same idiot bracket as people who think 'being real and getting off the fence' is the only way to survive in the House, people who think 'saying stuff to folk's face not behind their back' is a noble art, oh and that Dale should win 'coz he iz well fit, tho iznit'. Only idiots think any of this. I'm sorry if you are an idiot. I don't know how to help you. That's not strictly my department.
With regards to intro VT tapes, every housemate plays up to an extent. The only reason Rex's VT is the most 'real' of the BB9 bunch is because he actually is that much of a **** in real life.
Rex's audition VT is basically Little Lord Fauntlerex bragging that he'll not be able to bring his most expensive watches into the House and that his family are minted, topped off with a bit of waffle about his very, very important restaurant job (the one that allows him to take 100 days off in Summer, like most executive jobs do when you're aged 24).
Luckily for Rex, his VT didn't need much tweaking to make him look like a silly little over-priveliged tosspot who farts about all day in West London wasting money on cabs and trinkets for his equally vapid girlfriend, while elsewhere in London waiters and kitchen staff run themselves ragged for money that would barely keep Rex in throwaway mobile phones.
Come the revolution Rex, when the people's republic of Dentonia is established, it will be a Ceausescu-style Christmas for you and many of your ilk.
But as I say, this isn't about Rachel's VT. Rex doesn't care about the VT. He's just enjoying quacking on at Rachel, because it makes him a very big tall boy indeed (without the hassle to go and stand around Lego land). It's undeniable Rex is one of the more eloquent housemates, so it must be great fun twisting Rachel up in mental and verbal knots until she's totally lost sight of what the argument is. I know I've lost sight of Rex's argument.
Let's get this straight: last week Rex was angry with Rachel because inside the House Rachel is very nice, smiley and calm. Rex believed that outside of the House Rachel has another side and is much more of a firecracker? Ok, I understand that. But now, Rex is angry at Rachel because she is dull in the House and he's seen a tape where she claims to be lively outside of the House, but Rex is livid because Rachel isn't lively, she's dull which makes her a fraud!
OK, I'm lost. Isnt that two totally contradictory things? And anyway Rex, when is it Darnell's turn for a verbal bashing? I bet you could really have Darnell twisted into knots! Have you not noticed anything at all you don't like about him? Or is Darnell a different entity entirely, being 2 feet taller than you, 30 lbs heavier that you and boasting the House's shortest fuse?
Another good target for House slander is Mohammed. I rarely write about Mohammed as he's quiet and gently and really just ever so nice.
He's sat there for 55 days in a greying soduko print hoodie, taking abuse off pretty much everyone. I still don't understand what Mohammed has done to deserve this. I never really notice his 'greed'. I get told about it a dozen times a day but never quite grasp it. Mohammed is definitely the House scapegoat. He's the flatmate that we've all lived with that everyone slags off in the kitchen when he's at the library or pub.
Everyone is united by their uneasiness with Mohammed for that time he ate an extra egg and grabbed an extra glass of wine. One thing's for certain, when Mohammed is eventually evicted there will be a celebration followed by a massive void while they work out who next to vent frustration on. Good luck with that Kat and Rachel! '''
They're condemned by DNA to repeat the pattern forever. Exactly like I was last night, back in front of the livefeed, face squashed close to the screen, barking at a ginger gnome from Hampstead, 'Oi Rex? Why should you get a House visit from your dippy bird!? Why should you get reassurance that anyone on the outside world still loves you?!
Leave Rachel alone Rex! How come you're only vocal with the timid people in the House? Remember the night of Spitgate, Rex? Remember when Stuart, Dale, Darnell and Dennis were all squaring up for a fight? They were arguing over YOU Rex! Where was your razorsharp gob then?'
Of course when Rex did have cause to speak, not a single word was mumbled. It's almost like he knew that with stronger, more volatile people there's a good chance he might get flattened. But with girls like Rachel or Sara or Kat or Maysoon, it's 'happy days'. Rex can say what he wants to girls like this. I mean, literally anything he wants.
Kat looked fat in her video. Maysoon looked slutty. Sara isn't sexy. Rachel is the most boring housemate who he'd swap for scrabble. In fact, Rachel's a liar who cheated to get into the House by being bubbly in her VT tape. Actually, Rachel should get her makeup on the moment she wakes up so she's a bit more pretty like she was on her VT.
Rex has quacked on for days about the whole Rachel VT thing. He's obsessed with it. Rachel simply must face up to how much she's let herself, the House, the producers and the nation down. Oh, the shame Rachel! The shame!? Away and sob in the room with the giant bumhole on the door and think about the evil you have behest upon this country with your 'I'm a curvy girl' nonsense. BURN RACHEL RICE.
Of course, in reality, Rex couldn't give a flying crap about Rachel's VT. He's perfectly intelligent enough to know that the Big Brother audition process requires a certain amount of role-playing and showing off to survive each step. Who doesn't know that!? Away to the idiot step for you if you don't! I mean it. Go to the idiot step and sit with all the brainless people who believe that BB intro VT tapes aren't snappy caricatures.
You're in the same idiot bracket as people who think 'being real and getting off the fence' is the only way to survive in the House, people who think 'saying stuff to folk's face not behind their back' is a noble art, oh and that Dale should win 'coz he iz well fit, tho iznit'. Only idiots think any of this. I'm sorry if you are an idiot. I don't know how to help you. That's not strictly my department.
With regards to intro VT tapes, every housemate plays up to an extent. The only reason Rex's VT is the most 'real' of the BB9 bunch is because he actually is that much of a **** in real life.
Rex's audition VT is basically Little Lord Fauntlerex bragging that he'll not be able to bring his most expensive watches into the House and that his family are minted, topped off with a bit of waffle about his very, very important restaurant job (the one that allows him to take 100 days off in Summer, like most executive jobs do when you're aged 24).
Luckily for Rex, his VT didn't need much tweaking to make him look like a silly little over-priveliged tosspot who farts about all day in West London wasting money on cabs and trinkets for his equally vapid girlfriend, while elsewhere in London waiters and kitchen staff run themselves ragged for money that would barely keep Rex in throwaway mobile phones.
Come the revolution Rex, when the people's republic of Dentonia is established, it will be a Ceausescu-style Christmas for you and many of your ilk.
But as I say, this isn't about Rachel's VT. Rex doesn't care about the VT. He's just enjoying quacking on at Rachel, because it makes him a very big tall boy indeed (without the hassle to go and stand around Lego land). It's undeniable Rex is one of the more eloquent housemates, so it must be great fun twisting Rachel up in mental and verbal knots until she's totally lost sight of what the argument is. I know I've lost sight of Rex's argument.
Let's get this straight: last week Rex was angry with Rachel because inside the House Rachel is very nice, smiley and calm. Rex believed that outside of the House Rachel has another side and is much more of a firecracker? Ok, I understand that. But now, Rex is angry at Rachel because she is dull in the House and he's seen a tape where she claims to be lively outside of the House, but Rex is livid because Rachel isn't lively, she's dull which makes her a fraud!
OK, I'm lost. Isnt that two totally contradictory things? And anyway Rex, when is it Darnell's turn for a verbal bashing? I bet you could really have Darnell twisted into knots! Have you not noticed anything at all you don't like about him? Or is Darnell a different entity entirely, being 2 feet taller than you, 30 lbs heavier that you and boasting the House's shortest fuse?
Another good target for House slander is Mohammed. I rarely write about Mohammed as he's quiet and gently and really just ever so nice.
He's sat there for 55 days in a greying soduko print hoodie, taking abuse off pretty much everyone. I still don't understand what Mohammed has done to deserve this. I never really notice his 'greed'. I get told about it a dozen times a day but never quite grasp it. Mohammed is definitely the House scapegoat. He's the flatmate that we've all lived with that everyone slags off in the kitchen when he's at the library or pub.
Everyone is united by their uneasiness with Mohammed for that time he ate an extra egg and grabbed an extra glass of wine. One thing's for certain, when Mohammed is eventually evicted there will be a celebration followed by a massive void while they work out who next to vent frustration on. Good luck with that Kat and Rachel! '''