Help please.

[MrGaryy]

I'm not really fond of doing this but have found it to be quite therapeutic in the past and really could do with some advice.

I have a friend who I am very close to. I have been for years now. We've always had similar interests and we have that whole knowing what the other is thinking thing going on. Then recently she's started to go out with this guy. I don't really know him that well but seems decent enough from what I can tell. But it seems as if ever since she's started seeing him, she's becoming everything I hate in a person. She seems really chavvy and common and has started doing things like shortening all of her words online and spelling her name with double vowels. I know that seems silly but these were the kind of things we would laugh at the other chavs for doing.

And then there is this club where a lot of those chavs go to a lot. Without going into detail, it;s famous for going there if you want to get drunk and laid. It's pretty grim, any decent person I know hates the place, and me my friend have had discussion about how vile it is. Then the other day she says to me thats she plans to go there next weekend. She's says it totally breezy as if she had always loved the place.

I always got on so well with her and sought solace in talking to someone who's main ambition in life wasn't to snog some random person so they could tell people about it or who's highlight of their day was to go on Bebo. Now it just seems as if she's slowly morphing into the person she once hated too and I'm so confused. And a couple of months ago I told her I kind of liked this other girl. (I've been kind of choppy and changing with my opinion of this girl since then but still maintain an infatuation). She told me that she didn't think she was right for me and immediately tries to change to subject if I even mention this girl.

She's just changed so much. Sometimes she's exactly how she used to be and we get on so well. But then she switches so fast that it hits me hard. I'm just so confused as to where to go with our friendship.:conf2:

[LemonJam]

Stick by her and still be there for her. The last thing you want to do is let go of a previously good friend.

This'll sound pretty sexist, but I've always found that girls usually like to take interest or follow what their boyfriend does to show their support for them. If they break up, theres a chance she many realise that its not that stuff she's into, it was him she was into and just tagged along.

Yeh, I'm rambling/clueless LOL

[Ross]

Eee, my friend did that and she turned into a total bitch and starting hanging about with the people she once bitched about, she was so two-faced. I kinda speak to her now, a little bit but not much.

Anyway, you need to just be yourself around her, don't you change. She will soon come crawling back to you, and want your friendship again. Likelyhood is, she won't be with this boy for long if all he's after (it seems) is sex.

Just carry on being yourself... she will see. :thumbs:

[bronaaaa]

I know how you feel, one of my friends is starting to change a bit too, but yeah like LemonJam said just stick by her..the boyfriend won't be there forever

[MrGaryy]

Originally posted by Ross
Eee, my friend did that and she turned into a total bitch and starting hanging about with the people she once bitched about, she was so two-faced. I kinda speak to her now, a little bit but not much.

Anyway, you need to just be yourself around her, don't you change. She will soon come crawling back to you, and want your friendship again. Likelyhood is, she won't be with this boy for long if all he's after (it seems) is sex.

Just carry on being yourself... she will see. :thumbs:

See that's the most complicated thing. The guy himself doesn't actually seem to sleezy or nasty or anything. To be fair I don't know him that well but from what I can tell he seems to be alright. It;s more what she perceives him as or his scene.

Thanks for the advice everyone. :hugesmile:

[Emilee]

I had a problem like that, but i found that you have to accept whether people change for the better or worse. If you like that person enough you'll be able to see who you used to like somewhere behind their new-self.