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View Full Version : ****** My Life

lily.
01-04-2009, 09:04 PM
This is a good read:

http://www.fmylife.com/




This is one of my faves: Today, I ran to a public bathroom because of explosive diarrhea. In the middle of it, I noticed there was no more toilet paper nor paper towels remaining. The smallest bill in my wallet was a 5. I had to pay 10 dollars to wipe my own butt. FML.
DamonJ
01-04-2009, 09:07 PM
ew/
my favourite one from ~ages ago wuz like
"my gurlfriend wuznt feeling well
so i went to work to take her a yoghurt
i heard on the way up in the lift that she wuznt feeling well cause shed been cheating on her boyfriend with the new secretary."
ewps
i love ettt
Firewire
01-04-2009, 09:08 PM
lol

They are quite funny.
Loukas
01-04-2009, 09:10 PM
My cousin does this. :hello:

My fave is..

Today, I asked my boyfriend of almost ten months who his top five women to have sex with would be. I was third. My mom was second. FML
lily.
01-04-2009, 09:27 PM
haha Loukas... ooooooo.. burn!

I love the would-be rapist: Today, I decided to take a nap. My boyfriend gave me some sleeping pills but I decided last minute not to take them. I woke up to my boyfriend kissing my neck and unbuttoning my shirt. Without opening my eyes, I whispered "ooh this is so romantic." He blurted out shocked, "Oh...you're awake?!" FML
Ninastar
01-04-2009, 09:28 PM
Omg i was thinking you meant ending your life!


I was gunna be like?


****ING NO!! DON'T END YOUR LIFE! SO MANY PEOPLE LOVE YOU! x
30stone
01-04-2009, 09:39 PM
Originally posted by lili
haha Loukas... ooooooo.. burn!

I love the would-be rapist: Today, I decided to take a nap. My boyfriend gave me some sleeping pills but I decided last minute not to take them. I woke up to my boyfriend kissing my neck and unbuttoning my shirt. Without opening my eyes, I whispered "ooh this is so romantic." He blurted out shocked, "Oh...you're awake?!" FML

I tried that, same thing happened :sad:
lily.
01-04-2009, 10:18 PM
haha.. you predator!!!!!!!
MrGaryy
02-04-2009, 08:33 PM
my fave so far:



Today, I passed the girl I like a note asking her out, signed Mark H. She picked it up, read it, turned around and asked me, "Do you know who Mark H. is?"
bronaaaa
02-04-2009, 08:35 PM
Spent most of the evening on it :tongue:
*mazedsalv**
02-04-2009, 08:36 PM
Lol :laugh:
Dom:D
02-04-2009, 08:59 PM
Lol I love this website.
Annie
02-04-2009, 10:25 PM
Haha these are AWESOME!

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend I went into his shower to freshen up. Where I saw an open bottle of pubic lice shampoo. FML
30stone
02-04-2009, 10:29 PM
Today, this really attractive woman that I've known for years told me that when I can have sex with her standing up, she'll have sex with me. I'm confined to a wheelchair. FML

:spin2:
bronaaaa
03-04-2009, 04:27 PM
Today, I woke up a little after seven. I felt sick to my stomach because last night was my bachelor party and I drank more than I ever have before. I checked my phone, and I had received 42 missed calls. It was seven o'clock pm. Today was my wedding day.

LOL
Captain.Remy
03-04-2009, 04:34 PM
Yeah we have the French version and it's HUGE here. Like a proper phenomenon: politician, singers and people like that even talk about it in the papers. It's hilarious.
Corkie
03-04-2009, 05:37 PM
Today, I checked my facebook, and my wife of 5 years was listed as single. I then write on her wall that it is ok to announce to be married. She writes back saying that we have to talk and to come to the kitchen. My wife divorced me over facebook. FML

:laugh: that webdsites a good find