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lily.
20-07-2009, 07:49 PM
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.
Josy
20-07-2009, 07:51 PM
Originally posted by lili
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.

Lmao :laugh3:

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Novo
20-07-2009, 07:51 PM
The moon is actually a comet that was once on course to hit earth... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it into orbit.
CaraRawr
20-07-2009, 07:51 PM
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Josy
20-07-2009, 07:52 PM
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Arneldo
20-07-2009, 07:52 PM
I hate Chuck Norris.
Josy
20-07-2009, 07:54 PM
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
CaraRawr
20-07-2009, 07:56 PM
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.
Marc
20-07-2009, 08:07 PM
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Josy
20-07-2009, 08:15 PM
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Josy
20-07-2009, 08:17 PM
Chuck Norris can put humpty dumpty back together again.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:19 PM
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:20 PM
Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:27 PM
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
MarkWaldorf
20-07-2009, 10:50 PM
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:52 PM
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:53 PM
Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapons with two pieces of wood connected by a chain were called NunBarrys. No one ever did find out what happened to Barry.
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:54 PM
Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
MarkWaldorf
20-07-2009, 10:54 PM
LOL
lily.
20-07-2009, 10:56 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the **** out of the way.
Josy
20-07-2009, 11:09 PM
Jesus can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim on land
Josy
20-07-2009, 11:10 PM
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at burger king and got it.
lily.
21-07-2009, 08:48 AM
Best.
Thread.
Ever.




On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
lily.
21-07-2009, 08:49 AM
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's ****ing beef.
CaraRawr
21-07-2009, 08:55 AM
Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.
CaraRawr
21-07-2009, 08:55 AM
Originally posted by lili
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's ****ing beef.

LMAO
Jayson
21-07-2009, 11:36 AM
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Jayson
21-07-2009, 11:37 AM
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, as he decides what time it is.