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-   -   Smacking Children as a form of discipline (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=200939)

MTVN 13-05-2012 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135783)
Well, seeing as I happened to be talking about myself, and me getting the strap and why I got it : I think I'm mabye, just maybe, in a better position to say whether I felt it was abuse or violent - and I didn't. Indeed, it was very much seen as a badge of honour half the time by the other pupils. ;)

Sounds like it wasn't a very effective punishment then

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN (Post 5135799)
Sounds like it wasn't a very effective punishment then


Oh it was effective - when you were told that you had to go to 'one specific teacher'..... everyone else suddenly had this "You're on your own here..." Since there was always ONE teacher who didn't give a little light tap - that's when you KNEW the game was a bogey!

So yes, it WAS effective MTVN.

Kizzy 13-05-2012 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135783)
Well, seeing as I happened to be talking about myself, and me getting the strap and why I got it : I think I'm mabye, just maybe, in a better position to say whether I felt it was abuse or violent - and I didn't. Indeed, it was very much seen as a badge of honour half the time by the other pupils. ;)




OMG. :shocked::shocked: You might have something there - I was told that I came from my mummy's tummy.

Do you think that meant she ATE me then vomitted me back up. :bawling:

Wow... I never heard of girls getting that punishment, I used to piss my pants if my dad shouted...He never smacked me.
Mum did, but it took a lot to get her so riled ...

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kizzy (Post 5135821)
Wow... I never heard of girls getting that punishment, I used to piss my pants if my dad shouted...He never smacked me.
Mum did, but it took a lot to get her so riled ...


Us Scots are tuff. LOL.

Honestly: it was seen as out of the ordinary at all. Certainly when I went to school latterly in England, it didn't happen there - though I have a feeling it had been 'banned' by then.

Kizzy 13-05-2012 08:21 PM

Having said that a couple of my mates went to catholic school.....They got whacked A LOT bliddy evil nuns!

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kizzy (Post 5135833)
Having said that a couple of my mates went to catholic school.....They got whacked A LOT bliddy evil nuns!

Don't start me on Catholic Nuns and Priests........ there used to be a school in a place called Girvan - run by Nuns - and when I was a kiddiewinkle, my parents wanted to send me there.

thankfully they were talked out of it by more sensible people!

Kizzy 13-05-2012 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135839)
Don't start me on Catholic Nuns and Priests........ there used to be a school in a place called Girvan - run by Nuns - and when I was a kiddiewinkle, my parents wanted to send me there.

thankfully they were talked out of it by more sensible people!

OMG is that where they killed some and put them in the walls?....:shocked:

Marsh. 13-05-2012 08:29 PM

Makes me shiver that story. Is that the building they demolished and found hundreds of bodies in the foundations?

Jack_ 13-05-2012 08:30 PM

Niamh is right. As am I. It isn't an opinion, it's a fact.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5135283)
A "gentle" smack? Again........for it to have any kind of effective on the child it has to hurt them.

Exactly. Thread effectively over.

If it doesn't at least hurt then it's not effective, and how anyone could justify hurting anyone, let alone a child is just beyond me. It's not possible to. It's wrong and that's the end of it. And not only is it hurting them, but it's also quite physically threatening and intimidating. Sounds quite an odd concept to me and despite not being a parent myself, and at times finding some screaming children very irritating, never could I imagine myself or even want to lay a finger on a child, or even think about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5135458)
Anyone who can't handle a 4-6 year old without having to resort to violence against them -and they're still babies in my eyes- needs help themselves imo

Well I don't think this happens often Niamh - but again I agree with you. I think anyone that condones violence, or indeed any kind of physical abuse (unless used in self defence) has something wrong with them and needs help, there's no excuses for it whatsoever and as I've said time and time again, as a society we need to try and get to a stage where it's eradicated, and by effectively promoting such action, that isn't going to happen.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135501)
I was taught in school with the leather strap being a deterrent, not a cane. I still don't regard that as barbaric. It stopped a lot of the nonsense and misbehaviour.

There's only so much detention can do.

And why doesn't this surprise me?

Niamh's right, I couldn't see you defending someone slapping an elderly or disabled person, so what makes it alright when it's a child? I remember though you condoned the actions of that man who used physical force to throw the much younger and smaller built man off of a train, yet when I asked you if he'd thrown off a woman or an elderly person, or indeed both, you didn't seem so accepting then, or you may have again simply refused to acknowledge the question. That speaks volumes if you ask me.

Either you have quite a strong dislike for children...or, you quite like the idea of a physical force and violence.

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kizzy (Post 5135846)
OMG is that where they killed some and put them in the walls?....:shocked:

Quote:

Originally Posted by 08marsh (Post 5135847)
Makes me shiver that story. Is that the building they demolished and found hundreds of bodies in the foundations?


No idea.. I just recall it being spoken about when I was a bit older and before I did actually to boarding school. I'm now really curious!


Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack_ (Post 5135848)
Niamh is right. As am I. It isn't an opinion, it's a fact.



Exactly. Thread effectively over.

If it doesn't at least hurt then it's not effective, and how anyone could justify hurting anyone, let alone a child is just beyond me. It's not possible to. It's wrong and that's the end of it. And not only is it hurting them, but it's also quite physically threatening and intimidating. Sounds quite an odd concept to me and despite not being a parent myself, and at times finding some screaming children very irritating, never could I imagine myself or even want to lay a finger on a child, or even think about it.



Well I don't think this happens often Niamh - but again I agree with you. I think anyone that condones violence, or indeed any kind of physical abuse (unless used in self defence) has something wrong with them and needs help, there's no excuses for it whatsoever and as I've said time and time again, as a society we need to try and get to a stage where it's eradicated, and by effectively promoting such action, that isn't going to happen.



And why doesn't this surprise me?

Niamh's right, I couldn't see you defending someone slapping an elderly or disabled person, so what makes it alright when it's a child? I remember though you condoned the actions of that man who used physical force to throw the much younger and smaller built man off of a train, yet when I asked you if he'd thrown off a woman or an elderly person, or indeed both, you didn't seem so accepting then, or you may have again simply refused to acknowledge the question. That speaks volumes if you ask me.

Either you have quite a strong dislike for children...or, you quite like the idea of a physical force and violence.


I don't particularly care what you recall particularly as this thread is discussing young children, not a drunken, foul mouthed abusive lying fare dodging teenager - and to compare it to such is not a like for like situation at all.

I'd also appreciate if you kept your personal insults about me reigned in. You are here to discuss the subject matter - not to discuss me personally nor is it acceptable for you to personally insult me.

Kizzy 13-05-2012 08:45 PM

Either you have quite a strong dislike for children...or, you quite like the idea of a physical force and violence.

Bizarre supposition there jack.

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:45 PM

Been looking at the Girvan Nuns Schools...and came across this blog from someone.

School

I remember my first day at St Xaviours in Dalmelington. It was run by nuns who were very strict. I wore a uniform like St Trinians (I cant remember what it was called - Gymslip maybe?). I got the ruler on my hand for dipping my finger in the inkwell on the desk. I was only 4 or 5 at the time. The bus stop to go home was on the main road next to a barn with horses in it. The old bridge was still in use when I went to school. The new bridge was being built, it must be over fifty years old now. How time flies. My dad was a miner and we lived in brand new houses with inside bathroom and toilet. We had our own back and front garden, I think the street was called Barnsheen Ave (16).


Unfortunately, I can't exactly ask my parents which school it was as they are no longer here. I'm really intrigued now though.

MTVN 13-05-2012 08:48 PM

I don't think we should get too sanctimonious and judgemental, several of us have said their parents used the occasional light smack and it didn't have an adverse effect on them, myself included. I think I've got great parents, them giving me a smack every now and then when I was being an annoying bastard does not change that and certainly doesn't mean there was anything wrong with them or that they need help

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN (Post 5135864)
I don't think we should get too sanctimonious and judgemental, several of us have said their parents used the occasional light smack and it didn't have an adverse effect on them, myself included. I think I've got great parents, them giving me a smack every now and then when I was being an annoying bastard does not change that and certainly doesn't mean there was anything wrong with them or that they need help

Good post and good points there MTVN - and even nicer that you are speaking so highly of your parents.

RE the Girvan school - there appears to be several of them in the Ayrshire Area - Dalmellington, Ayr, Girvan..... and some of stories I'm reading - I'm actually quite sickened by.

But I guess that's derailing the thread a bit and I dont' want to veer off course.

Niamh. 13-05-2012 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kizzy (Post 5135757)
Yes psychological abuse works best anyway...We actually did find you on the doorstep, the hedgehogs left you because you were a very naughty baby.

No kind of abuse is good.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135783)
Well, seeing as I happened to be talking about myself, and me getting the strap and why I got it : I think I'm mabye, just maybe, in a better position to say whether I felt it was abuse or violent - and I didn't. Indeed, it was very much seen as a badge of honour half the time by the other pupils. ;)




OMG. :shocked::shocked: You might have something there - I was told that I came from my mummy's tummy.

Do you think that meant she ATE me then vomitted me back up. :bawling:

Whether you felt you deserved it or not is irrelevant to my opinion that no child ever deserves to be hit with a belt or a strap or a cane.

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5135931)
No kind of abuse is good.



Whether you felt you deserved it or not is irrelevant to my opinion that no child ever deserves to be hit with a belt or a strap or a cane.



I am in a better place to decide if punishment dished out to me personally, was in my own opinion, was acceptable, to me. I was relaying a personal experience and I think I am in a better position to comment on whether I felt that wrong or right or violent. I based that on my own personal experience. Your opinion is your opinion and I could also say that it is irrelevant to mine. That however would be quite disrespectful.


You do seem very intent on continually telling me I am wrong or my opinion is wrong.

Marsh. 13-05-2012 09:54 PM

I'm afraid you discredit your own opinion by so brazenly claiming it be the only "right" stance. It's a serious subject but you're doing yourself no favours with ridiculous statements like that Jack.

Niamh. 13-05-2012 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5135952)
I am in a better place to decide if punishment dished out to me personally, was in my own opinion, was acceptable, to me. I was relaying a personal experience and I think I am in a better position to comment on whether I felt that wrong or right or violent. I based that on my own personal experience. Your opinion is your opinion and I could also say that it is irrelevant to mine. That however would be quite disrespectful.


You do seem very intent on continually telling me I am wrong or my opinion is wrong.

Again.........If you said hitting disabled people was ok, I would tell you you are wrong, If you said hitting elderly people was ok I would tell you you are wrong and If you say hitting children is ok...........I will tell you you are wrong.

And hitting children with implements such as belts, canes or straps is most certainly wrong, infact I think you would wind up in prison if you did that to a child today.

Pyramid* 13-05-2012 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5135976)
Again.........If you said hitting disabled people was ok, I would tell you you are wrong, If you said hitting elderly people was ok I would tell you you are wrong and If you say hitting children is ok...........I will tell you you are wrong.

And hitting children with implements such as belts, canes or straps is most certainly wrong, infact I think you would wind up in prison if you did that to a child today.

This thread is not discussing hitting elderly people or disabled people though.

I'm not likely to wind up in any prison since I have said repeatedly on here that anything other than a gentle smack today - is unacceptable: an important point which you seem very deliberately to be ignoring.

MTVN has already clearly stated why he feels there is nothing wrong with it either, as have other. . It seems you have some bone to pick with me - given that you are soley addressing only what I have to say on the matter as far as believing there is nothing wrong with a gentle smack. I see you are not addressing any other poster who has commented with the same views as me - why would that be I wonder?

Kizzy 13-05-2012 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5135931)
No kind of abuse is good.



Whether you felt you deserved it or not is irrelevant to my opinion that no child ever deserves to be hit with a belt or a strap or a cane.

I was joking in that post niamh...

Niamh. 13-05-2012 10:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyramid* (Post 5136002)
This thread is not discussing hitting elderly people or disabled people though.

I'm not likely to wind up in any prison since I have said repeatedly on here that anything other than a gentle smack today - is unacceptable: an important point which you seem very deliberately to be ignoring.

MTVN has already clearly stated why he feels there is nothing wrong with it either, as have other. . It seems you have some bone to pick with me - given that you are soley addressing only what I have to say on the matter as far as believing there is nothing wrong with a gentle smack. I see you are not addressing any other poster who has commented with the same views as me - why would that be I wonder?

Pyramid, I'm quite sure if you check back along, you'll find that I have addressed other people besides you. Infact, I've replied to : Samuel, Ninastar,08Marsh, lostalex, Arista, Thesheriff, Mr. Luvaluva, Vicky, Bollo, The Mockinator and Kizzy.

I'd also like to point out that it was infact you that originally quoted me, I was simply replying to you so I would appreciate it if you would stop trying to paint such an untrue picture of events.

Niamh. 13-05-2012 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kizzy (Post 5136028)
I was joking in that post niamh...

ok :hugesmile:

MTVN 13-05-2012 10:26 PM

Hmm it's not that I see nothing wrong with it exactly, I just don't think whether you choose to smack your kids or not defines you as either a good parent or a bad parent. I see it more as a case of different strokes for different folks than it being objectively right or wrong

Niamh. 13-05-2012 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN (Post 5136042)
Hmm it's not that I see nothing wrong with it exactly, I just don't think whether you choose to smack your kids or not defines you as either a good parent or a bad parent. I see it more as a case of different strokes for different folks than it being objectively right or wrong

I think hitting someone (other than in self defence) is always wrong. I think society has made people think that this rule doesn't apply to young children.........when infact these should be the ones it applies to most of all.

MTVN 13-05-2012 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 5136057)
I think hitting someone (other than in self defence) is always wrong. I think society has made people think that this rule doesn't apply to young children.........when infact these should be the ones it applies to most of all.

It was self defence, self defence against my tantrums :idc:


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