Ive known someone who did it once people found out then she used it as a tool for attention.

It makes me sick when people do things like that just for sympathy and attention.

Would you not want to perhaps consider why they needed/wanted the attention. There could be underlying issues Charlie. There could of course be nothing more to it that a spoilt, self centred little brat who wasn't the limelight that week...... always best to consider there may be something at the root cause. (Which I am assuming, you may have determined...ie; it was the latter?)

Call me heartless or naive, but I still think that half of the time its attention seeking. It doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad thing

agreed, I would think there is usually underlying issues and unhappiness. At the start of this thread, I couldn't understand how people could harm themselves, then I thought omg I'm a smoker, if that isn't self harm I don't know what is!

Are you ILTRW's spokesman Stu? I'm quite sure they are able to speak for themselves: without 'handers'. Given they made a rather vague "Watch ILTRW, Cancun' with nothing else to go on ..... it's hardly any real contribution is it. Similiar to your own 'contribution' on the thread. None as far as I can see?

Oh I can't for the life of me pretend to understand that is the preferred course of action - but in the cases that are true to the 'illness' - there clearly is something going on - even if the person isn't able to verbalise or fully explain it themselves -as more often than not: the person knows they shouldn't do it.

I guess using smoking as an example is (for me personally) a very good one. That is a form of self harm absolutely: and many cannot understand why a smoker would want to do that. Mmm...food for thought indeed rhino.

it releases stress and frustration. and it's such a cliche but it helps to see the pain in the form of cuts or whatever. it makes things easier to deal with. also I think there is a level of addiction to it; because of the endorphins released to counteract the pain.

I've done it for as long as I remember, when I was little I used to bite myself when I got frustrated. I'm trying to stop, haven't done it for almost 4 months, because I'm sick of being covered in ugly scars.

oh and as far as I'm concerned it's got nothing to do with attention because I only do it on my thighs and hips

With the best will in the world: I will take your word for it if you wish to believe it to be so. A reality TV show still doesn't quite cut the mustard for me. There may be a semblence of 'truth' but sorry, in my opinion, any reality TV show is less to do with real life - especially one which started off years ago with good intent - but then gained nothing but a reputation for people acting up - in every sense of the word 'acting'.and for misappropriate behaviour (and yes, attention seeking).

sorry, but that's my opinion. Not saying I am right, or you are wrong. It's simply my view.

http://xfinitytv.comcast.net/blogs/2...ation-episode/

What brought on this episode of cutting yourself? Your bio says you have a history of this behavior.
What I was going through at the house – everyone was very cutthroat. I never had to deal with that at home. Having to deal with that took me into depression mode. Cutting myself was sort of a release for me. I haven’t done that in a really really long time because at home I don’t really go through those emotions any more. I don’t deal with people that I really don’t like on a regular basis. So when I was put in that situation it was very hard for me. Being in the house with those people, you’re just totally out of your element, it really brought my depression out because I couldn’t count on anyone I felt, and it was difficult.

Tell me about the roommates at the house who were not supportive. The roommates that weren’t supportive?
I don’t really know what to say about them, because I feel they don’t really understand the situation. They kind of gave the typical answer that everyone gives – oh, she’s just looking for attention, blah blah blah. And it’s just honestly, when someone is dealing with something that big, it’s not for attention. I don’t believe anyone does it for attention. But that’s because they just didn’t understand. They need to look a little bit more and not judge the person right away. That can really damage someone.

Do you have any idea why you began cutting yourself?
To be honest with you, I think I was very influenced by movies that I watched. I didn’t really watch PG 13 movies when I was little, so that definitely influenced me. I would see people cutting themselves in a movie and I would think, ‘oh, maybe that would help.’ That definitely opened it up for me. And I haven’t been able to stop from there.

What advice would you give people going through a similar situation?
Just, keep your head up, honestly. It’s not worth it and not a good way to handle your stress. Hurting yourself is not the way. There are different outlets you can use – you can paint, you can jog, you can go out, you can do a sport, you can go shopping, anything to keep them away from it. Some lose hope because they think it’s the only thing that helps. This is the only thing they found. It’s not true, you have to keep going, keep searching for a different outlet. It’s not healthy whatsoever.

i dabbled in it when i was 15. I did it because you feel so horrible, but life around you looks so perfect. I felt like everything was so fake. I wanted to make myself look like i felt. When i saw the cuts, i felt like at least there was something visual, something real that looked like how i felt, something that proved how i felt was real. Something i could see that made me feel less crazy. Cause when you are depressed or feeling like crap, you feel like it's only in your mind, but cutting was a way to take it out of your mind, and bring it into the real world.

When you see yourself bleeding, it feels more authentic. You feel like you deserve it, and you feel like finally you can see the hurt that was being hidden for so long. It proves to yourself that all the internal pain is real, and not just in your mind.

Setting the stage for an audience ILRW.

As I say, it's all for show - the tv audience. If you want to use the thread as a venue to discuss your passion for a reality TV show - that's up to you and it's your perogative to do so.


Personally, I'd rather discuss with real live people, who have actual experience, but that's just me.

Like most of you have already said some people believe external pain can aleviate internal/emotional pain. A sort of release. Oh and even the ones that do it for attention clearly have issues. One guy I know is always desperate to be the centre of attention and he was quite open about cuttign himself. At times I did/do get frustrated with him but at times I've defended him and said he should find other ways to express himself.

Btw I noticed some of you have said you've done it and aren't even sure of a solid reason. Going on a whim here: you don't necessarily have to always be distressed, angry or upset to do it. Some do it if they feel numb about something. It's another type of release like how people can go drinking and do drugs to try and experience something if they feel their repressing or void of human emotions

I wouldn't say you are either - we all have different opinions - and I do agree that there is an element of those who do such things to attention seek. It's the reason for the attention seeking that needs to be addressed ..... for the reasons I'd mentioned in my post to Charlie. it could indeed be for flippant reasons. on the other hand, there could be something far more concerning that the person is going through.f

It's a strange one, interesting one.

Good post. You've mentioned something I touched upon earlier: that those who self harm, can sometimes simply not verbalise or quite understand themselves, apart from 'release/pressure' being let out. It's very good point you've made: there are many other ways that this need for 'releasing that inner angst' could be channelled...... either by learning to verbalise, discuss, face up to possible fears or anxieties (real or otherwise) - or by chosing an alternative method of 'release' that is less/not harmful.

Even if it is attention seeking, is that bad? Obviously people in pain do need help, and they don't feel comfortable asking for help directly, because of shame and embarassment. If it's for attention doesn't make it any less serious.

I'd say it does make a difference - It depends on the reason they need the attention.

If it is just because they are self absorbed little divas who think they world owe them a living (you know the type) - as opposed to something critical being at the root cause - rather than just a stroppy little git / or egotistical adult who has to be the centre of attention for nothing more than wanting to be 'star turn' all the time.

I think what you're describing is just a hollywood character. I've never met anyone in my life that is just purely self-obsessed and 1 dimensional like that. I think it's important to always assume the best in people, and when someone looks like they're hurting, you should assume that they are.

I'd say you had a lot to live yet and a lot of people to meet yet then , if you seriously think for one minute that what I described is a Hollywood character.

I think you should actually read back on my posts in respect of it being important to assume the best in people. I do, until they act like arseholes for no good reason.

I have dabbled in it in the past. I don't even really know why. But I could've seen myself getting really addicted to the rush, so had to put a stop to it.

Surely if someone is so desperate for attention that they will purposely hurt themselves (whether superficially or not, to a degree), that craving in itself means that they are just as unhappy in themselves as those who do it for more emotional reasons. I don't think it's right to be elitist in the reason for someone harming themselves; it's not a normal thing to do in any circumstance.

They can't help it - depression.