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-   -   Does it bother you if... (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=242158)

Marsh. 13-12-2013 02:22 PM

In general no, it depends who it is.

I would have a huge problem if a tutor was being funny with me though. They are there to teach you, not make you uncomfortable. If it's so bad then try and discuss it with them or if they're being deliberately hostile then report them.

You're there for education, not to be treated like crap.

Cherie 13-12-2013 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Karl (Post 6540984)
Obviously most people will say they don't care but i think deep down everyone wants to be liked
Yeah it annoys me when stuff like that happens and i will try and sort it out but i just lose interest after a while if the person still hates me :laugh:

Not necessarily. Whatever situation you are in from day you start school to the day you retire you will meet people who just don't like you, if you have done nothing to justify the dislike it is just a personality thing and their problem and as long as it doesn't impact on your life (like giving bad grades as in Lilys case) then so be it.

Kazanne 13-12-2013 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by joeysteele (Post 6541155)
My guess is that you would need good reason to be like that with someone Kazanne because I only see you as one of the really nicest of people.
If you felt the need to get nasty towards someone then I would say they certainly would deserve it.

As to the question,I think at times it does bother me whether people like me or not, I have learned I can do little as to the situation if someone doesn't though and so I just accept that.
I do feel I do little to give any real cause for someone not to like me but if I know someone doesn't then I would make it that I avoid them at all times if possible.

Thankyou Joey that is sweet of you and I do try and like most people but some do make it difficult,As long as the people I like,like me ,then I'm good with that.:hugesmile:

Natalie. 13-12-2013 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinselBalls (Post 6541123)
:hug:

:flowers:

Livia 13-12-2013 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The baby Zeesus (Post 6541109)
Yes. My best friend's girlfriend has been nothing but a ******* to me..... etc.

Name and postcode. I'll sort it for you Zee.

fingers 13-12-2013 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 6541345)
Name and postcode. I'll sort it for you Zee.

The Gun Moll has spoken! Tutors will tremble! :devil:

Z 13-12-2013 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 6541345)
Name and postcode. I'll sort it for you Zee.

:devil: incomiiiiiiiiiiing

Brother Leon 13-12-2013 04:43 PM

In school days yeah, but these days I don't give a ****. My circle of friends is tiny anyway and I wouldn't want it any other way.

fingers 13-12-2013 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Father Simpmas (Post 6541393)
In school days yeah, but these days I don't give a ****. My circle of friends is tiny anyway and I wouldn't want it any other way.

That Snowman is one fat assed Bastid!

lily. 13-12-2013 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 6541041)
Get in to bitch mode Lily. She's not in a position of seniority, she's your tutor. She kind of works for you.

I find it difficult to know where she fits in that respect Livia..

Like, at work, there are clear roles and I know the chain of command, so to speak..

The last time I was in education, I was a teenager, so things were very different, but I class her as senior, because she's the class leader.. Unfortunately, she's also the department leader. I think she might be on a power-trip to be honest. I tried the 'Dean' method of being super-nice, but I'm still getting the snarky comments from her, and everyone else notices it.. I think they're all waiting for me to crack and just effing lose it with her lol..

Shaun 14-12-2013 12:09 AM

say crack again

Kizzy 14-12-2013 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TinselBalls (Post 6541116)
No it doesn't bother me at all,I'de rather have a few true friends that I know like me ,than lots of fairweather aquaintances anyway,Ide be suspicious if everyone liked me as I can be such a bitch.Also if everyone liked you and you liked everyone something there is false:hugesmile:

:joker: I knew there was a reason I love you..Couldn't have put it better myself!

However as this is a tutor there really shouldn't be anything personal affecting how you interact, have you ever given them cause to have such a negative perception of you lily?

MTVN 14-12-2013 12:37 AM

Yea majorly, one of my weaknesses that I hate to be disliked and feel obliged to always try and change that persons opinion

Marsh. 14-12-2013 12:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by King Moonracer (Post 6542457)
Yea majorly, one of my weaknesses that I hate to be disliked and feel obliged to always try and change that persons opinion

I thoroughly detest you.

King Gizzard 14-12-2013 12:51 AM

King Moonracer the prick

Ammi 14-12-2013 04:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JingleBitch (Post 6540971)
.. someone doesn't like you, even though you've given them no reason to dislike you and you're nothing but nice to them?

One of my tutors is like this, and I don't know why it irks me, but it really does..

I feel like it's unjustified, and wouldn't mind if she had a good reason for it, but I just want to stunt up to her and ask her what her effing problem is.. which of course I can't, or that would just validate her dislike for me..

I want to not care, and I don't know if it's because I have to spend time with her a few days a week, or because she's in a position of seniority, but I struggle to not care..

..if it was me, I would just ask her and say if there's a problem..not in a confrontational/hostile way because as you said, that would just validate how she is toward you and she would feel justified for being how she is/try to put it back on you..but as she doesn't have a reason/there doesn't seem any reason to it, then it really is an issue she has, not you..and by ignoring it, then it's making it your problem because it's bothering you, so give it back to her where it belongs as she's the one who has created it...also because it could become your problem in a much more important and serious way by having an effect on your course/studies/distracting etc if you just ignore it...just tell her you sense a hostility and then she has to somehow respond to that..?..


...EDIT:..also, if it was one of your children..(I think you're a mum..?...)...you wouldn't ignore it if one of their teachers seemed hostile toward them...obviously because it isn't a very good way/appropriate way for a teacher to behave but also because you would be concerned about the effect it could have on their school work...this really is no different..doing this course is a big thing to you/important to you so don't allow any silliness from her spoil it for you...ask her about it and not only let her know how aware you are of it but make her look at her own actions and justify them...she's entitled to not like you and doesn't have to have a reason but as your tutor/mentor, she isn't entitled to openly express it or in any way make you feel uncomfortable or undermine you...

Z 14-12-2013 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yukon Cornelius (Post 6542477)
King Moonracer the prick

Why is everyone being so funny recently, I swear I've burst into laughter at least a dozen times in the last 24 hours because of TiBB

lily. 18-12-2013 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Snow Angel (Post 6542435)
:joker: I knew there was a reason I love you..Couldn't have put it better myself!

However as this is a tutor there really shouldn't be anything personal affecting how you interact, have you ever given them cause to have such a negative perception of you lily?

No. I think she just doesn't like my personality, if that makes sense. She has been this way from day one.

lily. 18-12-2013 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ammi (Post 6542529)
..if it was me, I would just ask her and say if there's a problem..not in a confrontational/hostile way because as you said, that would just validate how she is toward you and she would feel justified for being how she is/try to put it back on you..but as she doesn't have a reason/there doesn't seem any reason to it, then it really is an issue she has, not you..and by ignoring it, then it's making it your problem because it's bothering you, so give it back to her where it belongs as she's the one who has created it...also because it could become your problem in a much more important and serious way by having an effect on your course/studies/distracting etc if you just ignore it...just tell her you sense a hostility and then she has to somehow respond to that..?..


...EDIT:..also, if it was one of your children..(I think you're a mum..?...)...you wouldn't ignore it if one of their teachers seemed hostile toward them...obviously because it isn't a very good way/appropriate way for a teacher to behave but also because you would be concerned about the effect it could have on their school work...this really is no different..doing this course is a big thing to you/important to you so don't allow any silliness from her spoil it for you...ask her about it and not only let her know how aware you are of it but make her look at her own actions and justify them...she's entitled to not like you and doesn't have to have a reason but as your tutor/mentor, she isn't entitled to openly express it or in any way make you feel uncomfortable or undermine you...

You know a part of me is thinking that any kind of confrontation here is going to make it worse. I can't help feeling that the best course of action is to fly beneath her radar until June. If she denies doing it, what do I do with that? If she implies it is all in my head, how do I prove otherwise? I'm obviously not going to involve the rest of the students so what evidence do I really have?

Funny you should bring up the part about my kids, because Greg also said something along those lines when my course started and I was getting grief from her. It's funny how you'll put up with things yourself, but won't let anyone do the same things to your kids.

Ammi 18-12-2013 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JingleBitch (Post 6553555)
You know a part of me is thinking that any kind of confrontation here is going to make it worse. I can't help feeling that the best course of action is to fly beneath her radar until June. If she denies doing it, what do I do with that? If she implies it is all in my head, how do I prove otherwise? I'm obviously not going to involve the rest of the students so what evidence do I really have?

Funny you should bring up the part about my kids, because Greg also said something along those lines when my course started and I was getting grief from her. It's funny how you'll put up with things yourself, but won't let anyone do the same things to your kids.

..I think you've just got to go with how you feel is the best way to handle it because you're the one who is in the situation and have a feeling of how you think she'll react if you say anything...and she probably would just deny it all tbh, but she would then be aware of how aware you are about it and maybe realise that she could get into trouble or better 'be less obvious'..?...I think you've just got to see how it goes and if it's really becoming an issue for you and maybe detracting from your studies/course, then decide what to do then...

Mystic Mock 18-12-2013 05:44 PM

Bother me it does.


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