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-   -   Judy Finnigan forced into humiliating apology (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=266285)

Niamh. 14-10-2014 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet (Post 7323352)
So are we saying that men should not bang drunk women?

or at what stage do you think, hang on she is too pissed and wont remember this

Well, from the sounds of that article you posted regarding this case, the guy that she'd actually met while out wasn't convicted of rape at all. That case doesn't sound like a typical drunk girl gets drunk and regrets sex the next morning type either

Livia 14-10-2014 01:44 PM

The vast majority of men know that to rape a woman in any circumstances is wrong. But rape has been going on since humans have been populating the earth, and you're not going to stop it by saying that a woman shouldn't have to take responsibility for herself. It's not like I'm saying men should be given carte blanche to rape a woman, but I've seen young women both on TV and in reality, pissed, sitting on the kerb, skirt up round their waist, totally insensible to anything that's going on around her. What a state to get into... She wouldn't know whether she was giving her consent or not... until the next morning when she's in charge of her own mind again. In my opinion, if you're drunk beyond knowing what you're doing, then you are deliberately putting yourself at risk. That's not to say a man should be able to rape you... just that, if he says you gave consent, how do you know he's wrong? If a sober woman doesn't give consent... that's a whole different story.

Niamh. 14-10-2014 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 7323359)
The vast majority of men know that to rape a woman in any circumstances is wrong. But rape has been going on since humans have been populating the earth, and you're not going to stop it by saying that a woman shouldn't have to take responsibility for herself. It's not like I'm saying men should be given carte blanche to rape a woman, but I've seen young women both on TV and in reality, pissed, sitting on the kerb, skirt up round their waist, totally insensible to anything that's going on around her. What a state to get into... She wouldn't know whether she was giving her consent or not... until the next morning when she's in charge of her own mind again. In my opinion, if you're drunk beyond knowing what you're doing, then you are deliberately putting yourself at risk. That's not to say a man should be able to rape you... just that, if he says you gave consent, how do you know he's wrong? If a sober woman doesn't give consent... that's a whole different story.

We're talking about people who were actually raped though, just because a person is drunk doesn't necessarily mean they're going to forget everything that happened the night before.

In the specific case that Judy commented on yes the girl said she can't remember what happened but it sounds like she may have been drugged, and the court must have thought so too considering they jailed this footballer for 5 years after hearing the evidence :shrug:

Ramsay 14-10-2014 02:18 PM

Wrecks that my tits that people have mysteriously forgotten that Mike Tyson was convicted of raping a girl back in 92 but now everyone loves him
If i was at player at Sheffield Utd i know i wouldn't want a rapist in the same dressing room as me. absolute muck.

Livia 14-10-2014 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7323368)
We're talking about people who were actually raped though, just because a person is drunk doesn't necessarily mean they're going to forget everything that happened the night before.

In the specific case that Judy commented on yes the girl said she can't remember what happened but it sounds like she may have been drugged, and the court must have thought so too considering they jailed this footballer for 5 years after hearing the evidence :shrug:

I'm very sorry she was raped, I'm very sorry anyone is raped, it's a truly horrific thing to happen. So surely the message should be, take responsibility for your own safety and don't get so drunk you can't take care of yourself.

Livia 14-10-2014 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ramsay (Post 7323380)
Wrecks that my tits that people have mysteriously forgotten that Mike Tyson was convicted of raping a girl back in 92 but now everyone loves him
If i was at player at Sheffield Utd i know i wouldn't want a rapist in the same dressing room as me. absolute muck.

Mike Tyson was convicted of raping Desiree Washington in 1992 after she willingly accompanied him back to his hotel room at 3am. I'm not sure what she imagines she was going back there to do at that time. She also had a history of rape accusations, and she made a packet from the case, which I'm sure salved her hurt somewhat.

Niamh. 14-10-2014 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 7323382)
I'm very sorry she was raped, I'm very sorry anyone is raped, it's a truly horrific thing to happen. So surely the message should be, take responsibility for your own safety and don't get so drunk you can't take care of yourself.

What message? That if you're drunk when you get raped the guy who raped you shouldn't lose his job? cos that's what Judy was saying...

Bluerang1 14-10-2014 02:26 PM

Livia has a valid point. Is all drunk sex, that is both parties are drunk, considered rape because neither, or the female which is always the case, was intoxicated so couldn't give consent? This is a big issue here at my college but I mean if you willingly go out to get blackout drunk you should know that there will be consequences. It's annoyed me when someone said "don't leave your drunk friends to wander about by themselves". Friends are not other friends keepers. Adults should be able to take care of themselves without needing others to clean up their messes.

Livia 14-10-2014 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7323392)
What message? That if you're drunk when you get raped the guy who raped you shouldn't lose his job? cos that's what Judy was saying...

What Judy is saying is what she's saying. What I'm saying is, don't get so drunk you might get raped. There are bad people out there so take some responsibility.

Amy Jade 14-10-2014 02:31 PM

Sounds to me like his friend had sex with her and she was so drunk she had passed out and the friend sent the dirty rapist a text to come get some.

Rape doesn't have to be a violent thing, would Judy or anyone else defending him still defend him if it was their daughter in the drunk girls position? doubt it.

Livia 14-10-2014 02:39 PM

Having just read Judy Finnigan's words, I think the whole bloody thing has been blown out of proportion.

arista 14-10-2014 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 7323404)
Having just read Judy Finnigan's words, I think the whole bloody thing has been blown out of proportion.


Yes but Every Paper attacked her
as it was her first time on the new Revamped
Loose Women

Livia 14-10-2014 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arista (Post 7323412)
Yes but Every Paper attacked her
as it was her first time on the new Revamped
Loose Women

Slow news day.

Niamh. 14-10-2014 02:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 7323404)
Having just read Judy Finnigan's words, I think the whole bloody thing has been blown out of proportion.

I disagree completely

lostalex 14-10-2014 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluerang1 (Post 7323393)
Livia has a valid point. Is all drunk sex, that is both parties are drunk, considered rape because neither, or the female which is always the case, was intoxicated so couldn't give consent? This is a big issue here at my college but I mean if you willingly go out to get blackout drunk you should know that there will be consequences. It's annoyed me when someone said "don't leave your drunk friends to wander about by themselves". Friends are not other friends keepers. Adults should be able to take care of themselves without needing others to clean up their messes.


there is a big difference between 2 people having drinks together, having a good time and capping off the evening with a shag, VS 4 drunk men finding a drunk woman stumbling around on the street that they've never met and bringing her home to have their way with her.

a huuuuge difference. imho.

Bluerang1 14-10-2014 02:51 PM

Oh that Judy! She's so old now.

Livia 14-10-2014 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluerang1 (Post 7323423)
Oh that Judy! She's so old now.

The years haven't been kind to her, have they.

Bluerang1 14-10-2014 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex (Post 7323420)
there is a big difference between 2 people having drinks together, having a good time and capping off the evening with a shag, VS 4 drunk men finding a drunk woman stumbling around on the street that they've never met and bringing her home to have their way with her.

Well at my school drunk girls seem to call rape after nights with one guy so that's where my perspective is from. And there's no difference whether it's one or two. If a girl doesn't want to have sex but is too drunk to think for herself, and so is some random guy she meets at a bar, how is he at fault if she calls rape the next morning? They were out of their minds.

This is why I don't drink, I don't want to not be in control of myself.

Niamh. 14-10-2014 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluerang1 (Post 7323429)
Well at my school drunk girls seem to call rape after nights with one guy so that's where my perspective is from. And there's no difference whether it's one or two. If a girl doesn't want to have sex but is too drunk to think for herself, and so is some random guy she meets at a bar, how is he at fault if she calls rape the next morning? They were out of their minds.

This is why I don't drink, I don't want to not be in control of myself.

And these girls who "call rape" after a night out does the guy they accuse of rape get convicted? and how do you know that they weren't raped?

lostalex 14-10-2014 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bluerang1 (Post 7323429)
Well at my school drunk girls seem to call rape after nights with one guy so that's where my perspective is from. And there's no difference whether it's one or two. If a girl doesn't want to have sex but is too drunk to think for herself, and so is some random guy she meets at a bar, how is he at fault if she calls rape the next morning? They were out of their minds.

This is why I don't drink, I don't want to not be in control of myself.

If he was as drunk as you are implying in this hypothetical situation, he wouldn't even be able to get it up, it's called Whisky Dick. You are making it sound like there aren't tons of guys that specifically PREY upon drunk women, even joke about it with their mates. you sound very naive.

bots 14-10-2014 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia (Post 7323227)
I'm not excusing rape... but if a young woman is so pissed she can't take care of herself then it should serve as a warning to other young women... because as far as I can see, young women are still getting pissed out of their minds with monotonous regularity, and so I think they must take a little of the responsibility when a woman incapacitated by alcohol, is raped. If you have an accident in a car when you're pissed, and you're seriously injured, your insurance will not pay out and you face all kinds of penalties and punishments. If you're raped while you're pissed, you're a victim.

Hmm, someone who is drunk is a vulnerable person, similar to a child or an old or sick person. The fact that the vulnerability was self inflicted by getting drunk is irrelevant. The weak and vulnerable should be able to live without fear of being attacked, full stop. If someone takes advantage of a vulnerable person, whatever they do, there should be a corresponding punishment. Its crystal clear in my opinion.

Bluerang1 14-10-2014 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex (Post 7323442)
If he was as drunk as you are implying in this hypothetical situation, he wouldn't even be able to get it up, it's called Whisky Dick. You are making it sound like there aren't tons of guys that specifically PREY upon drunk women, even joke about it with their mates. you sound very naive.

And you seem to always make excuses in favor of the girls.

lostalex 14-10-2014 03:15 PM

I think livia is just saying that everyone should be aware of dangerous circumstances. I think both men and women need to be more conscious of their actions, not just women. The same way we all lock our doors at night, but that doesn't mean that anyone deserves to get robbed if they forget one night.

A thief is still a thief even if you don't lock the doors, and a rapist is still a rapist even if you had a few drinks.

Niamh. 14-10-2014 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex (Post 7323449)
I think livia is just saying that everyone should be aware of dangerous circumstances. I think both men and women need to be more conscious of their actions, not just women. The same way we all lock our doors at night, but that doesn't mean that anyone deserves to get robbed if they forget one night.

A thief is still a thief even if you don't lock the doors, and a rapist is still a rapist even if you had a few drinks.

I agree with this

Bluerang1 14-10-2014 03:19 PM

Same.


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