And apart from that there’s a whole socio-political thing about touching black women’s hair and how it’s grossly inappropriate. Invasion of personal space is just an annoying part of day-to-day life and I’m sure Ngozi knows that and wouldn’t have reacted like she did if it was just that.

I suppose that's a fair point.

Surely she would've had some Londoner friends though, what I mean by that is sometimes people pick up lingo from their friends, including sometimes regional accents.

An indirect apology in her resgination is not an apology though is it? That's like me offending you then saying in a PM to Cherie that I was sorry if I pissed you off. I wouldn't accept that kind of apology either. :laugh:

the charity is only being investigated because of all the fuss. There are hundreds of charities all being run poorly, where nothing has been done year after year

It might not have been particularly appropriate, but if you're going to wear a name badge, maybe make sure it's not being obscured by dreads?

And if one of those other charities stepped into the spotlight making spurrious claims, they'd be investigated too.

You are right.
That is in no way an apology at all.
Nor was her resignation one.

My own suspicious mind has me feeling she's more than likely been told to apologise directly in person.
After the time that's passed where she clearly chose not to at all in person.

Then she should have asked if she can see her badge ,you don't put your hands on a stranger's hair. Even when you know the person ... it can still be rude.

And with that, her accounting worries will magically disappear.

One simple question to Marlene.

Marlene, do you want the checks on your charities accounting to disappear?

That's a whole different issue.

I'm sure she would however and it's a valid question.

some facts about the Fulani...:umm2:

https://www.opendoorsusa.org/christi...thern-nigeria/

They weren’t dreads. What I’d say for Marlene’s coiffure and costume is that they were just bizarre full-stop (so many black people agree on this). Everyone has the right to wear pretty-much whatever they want but dressed like that I would’ve been more interested in what planet she was from rather than which country. The hair was horrendous.

That's how she referred to her hair :shrug: I'd say they're dreads in the same way that Jedward have mohawks :joker:

However she referred to it, any normal person wouldn’t be tempted to touch it. It didn’t look good at all if we’re being honest.

Oh I've never denied it was bad manners.

And listen, Oliver, what’s your opinion on the link between autism and gender-identity confusion (this is one for my other thread)? I don’t like to play to gender stereotypes at all but there may be an element of truth to the claim that autism and Asperger’s (not that I’m super-sold on those labels as we use them today) are an exaggeration of certain stereotypical masculine qualities (which is one reason why the majority of diagnoses obviously go to males) but at the same time there’s a certain androgyny and gender-ambiguity that a lot of people on the spectrum report and they’re probably slightly over-represented in people who choose to biologically transition so it’s a tricky one. Y’know?

Neuro-atypicality is something I've definitely heard of as being common in trans-identified people, as is those who've suffered some form of child abuse.

It could be that (for want of better phrasing) the autistic view of femininity and masculinity is seen as more literal, and someone who acts in a way which is contrary to gender norms "must be" trans?

Many would….:shrug:

But then (especially with the widening of the concept of autism that’s been communicated to the lay-public) a lot of people with other disorders that might cause deficits in things like non-verbal communication (complex p.t.s.d., dysthymic depression that goes untreated for a long time) are often mislabelled as autistic by people who don’t understand them and in those cases there’s often a certain asexuality resulting from it which is less a reflection of them than it is the loss of energy and interest in a wide variety of things so it’s hard to tell how accurate the data about trans. ideas being somewhat higher in the autistic community. There’s definitely something going on in-between all that but what’s truly autism/being a quirky, androgynous weirdo with Asperger’s and what’s complex p.t.s.d. with bad social anxiety and lack of sexual assertion misinterpreted as asexual ambivalence isn’t always easy to tell.

I have lots of family from Germany. Say I changed my name to Helga Schicklgruber and took to wearing a dirndl to a party at the palace. Someone may have asked me, where are you from? I'd I'd have said, east London. And she'd have said no, where are your people from? I would have said, Germany, originally. No one would have had to apologise to anyone. And Marlene's organisation is now under investigation for financial anomalies which is nice. Sistah Space is only available for African or Caribbean women and closed to all other women. Can you imagine a charity available to white women only?

Exactly Livia….:wavey:

HMRC do your work

That's quite strange. But it's okay for someone to touch my hair? What's special about a black woman's hair?