I know, it is awfull. It's just I don't think I could find them attractive. Maybe it's just part of me, I guess I see it as a weakness. And the whole 'sterile' thing I guess stems from the one person I do know who was more plain and bland than an A4 peice of paper. I know it's band to stereotype, but for some reason I just don't think I could date someone in a wheelchair. It's bad, but I think true for me.

yeah but there's plenty of able bodied people who are bland or emotionally sterile too:joker: I'm not saying you should date someone in a wheel chair, it was just the comment about them being emotionally sterile that I thought was a bit out of order!

No I know, it's bad. I guess it would change if I met someone different, I guess it's just like when you meet a dick head with a certain name, and before you meet someone else nice with that name you just hate it. Also it may be the general look of being in chair, I know it's wrong but I would feel like I couldn't just spontaneously go for a hug or something. I realise what an ignorant dick I sound.

As a wheelchair user myself, im absolutely astonished with some of the people's attitudes on this forum, of people who are in a wheelchair, im a happily married woman, i live life to full as best i can.

This thread doesn't try to create a reaction? :conf: Jeez-oh kid - get a life or job. You seriously need to think about what yer saying.

I'm astonished at that attitude to be honest. If I was in a wheelchair I would fully understand and accept some peoples instinctive aversion to want to get into a relationship with me. That's just being realistic.

Is it any different to virtually every single one of us who have at some point internally turned down, ignored or walked away from a potential relationship or encounter with someone at a bar of club because he or she was simply physically not to our tastes?

Is that also a sick, disgusting thing? No it's just biology. The way we are. And obviously not all of us are the same as evident by the fact that you are married. But if I had a choice between two equally attractive and interesting people but one was in a wheelchair then I would go for the non wheelchair. I'm just being honest with you here so I hope that doesn't sound too harsh but come on. I'm obligated at the end of the day to tell the truth. Not everyone here will do that.
















I declare this can of worms open!

yes but Ive never been around somebody in one and probably not likely to be. They generally live restricted isolated lives(relatively speaking) so people like me don't really get to interact with them.

But yes, if we clicked and there was an attraction. Although I think the wheelchair may certainly present very real practical problems; it may limit their ability to have sex. You may even have to assist them to the toilet. So its a real issue but love could conquer all I guess. Or lust if theyre really hot.

1. I'm not a kid, don't ****ing patronize me you old drunk.

2. Of course it's creating a reaction, it is a hard subject but you're just making it worse.

3. Everybody else is fine with it, you're the only one making a fuss quelle ****ing suprise.

Grow. Up. You. 45. Year. Old. ****ing. Joke.

dear Lord. What a narrow minded attitude.

thats just like saying you met a boring black person once and now associate all black people to be like that. Actually, its worse.

emotionally sterile? I would think if anybody knew about emotion its somebody struggling day to day trapped in a wheel chair. Seems its you thats emotionally sterile tbh.

A really good post Zippy,well said.

I don't think it was intended the way you seem to think it is. Yes it is a sensitive question, but one that people have differing opinions on.

A huuuggggeee hug for you. I have nothing but respect. In a wheelchair I am sure you find things a lot harder than someone like me who still has use of her legs and yet you still see the bright side to life. Nothing but respect :worship:

I wouldnt go out my way to but if I liked them then yes I probably would.. without sounding horrible though it might go stale quick so I doubt it'd last.

However if I was in a good relationship with somebody, and then them became wheelchaired Id definitely stick with them :)

http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/7433/roseu.jpg

http://img233.imageshack.us/img233/7125/rose2jl.jpg

^
I watched a documentary on her, shes a legend.

^^definitely

*googles disabled porn*




j/k

:laugh:

I still think that some of the TiBB sprogs should wake-up and smell the coffee. Sure, in a perfect world we'd all be physically able and wheelchairs a thing of the past.

Life doesn't work that way and people who need assistance are still the same people. Scotland had a sweet health campaign about 'seeing past' the problems of those with physical or mental impairments - it was essentially about abilities.

If OP becomes unemployed and down on his luck, I wouldn't start a thread "would you date an unemployed bloke?". It seems to me that it's picking on people for an aspect of them.

sproggies

At least you managed not to break the swear filter with your well-argued post. Thanks for the contribution

Was it journalist you wanted in your career ambition??? I can see lots of potential there

I don't think he means any offence. Regardless of who is in a wheelchair and the reasons for it, some people can't see past the disability and the perceptions that come with it. Yes its mostly ignorance but it's still a genuine feeling that prevails in society.

A lot of people can't even look at somebody in a wheelchair; its like theyre invisible. I think they fear what could happen to them. Or maybe they fear they will give them a look of pity or disgust. Im very conscious of not wanting a disabled person to think Im pittying them. Thats the last thing they want.

But anyways, I think you're misreading the intentions of the thread just a little. :)

This is not picking on anyone. It's a question based on the world in which we live and yes, sometimes there will be answers people don't like around this subject but again that is the world in which we live. :)

You're probably right Zips

I'd told BigBrotherFan4Ever about how I work for a Council who think they have disabled access - the disabilities main Officer is a wheelchair user and made us try one day using wheelchairs - Chief Exec was shocked.

My point was that people are still people - when LemonJam is unemployed, I WILL do the nasty question about dating an unemployed.

I'd like to think so, if I want to be someone and they happen to be in a wheelchair it's not an issue.

OK would you date an unemployed bloke?

That question has been asked on here before. It's not a nasty question. It's like someone asking if gay men should be allowed to adopt or would you date a black person. Again neither are nasty questions, but people will have opinions on them.

You act as if LJ has asked this question with hatred towards people in wheel chairs, when he clearly hasn't. Now I suggest you either leave the thread (and not get the last word like you feel the need to so often do) if it upsets you that much or leave LJ alone when he hasn't done anything wrong.

It really shouldn't matter. It's the person you're dating not the chair. How would you be if the person you were going out with suddenly started using a wheelchair? Dump 'em??

Bring it on. It's a perfectly valid question that I wouldn't be offended by if people answered no.

Again why does it have to be ignorance or fear? What if someone plain just feels they are entitled to have a healthy relationship with someone who can walk, run jump around in the park etc like they can?

I know that sounds absoloutely awful but christ. I'd rather go out with a girl who can offer more and do all the things I do both in the physical sense as well as the emotional sense. That's me being honest. We should all be entitled to that much, no?

I'm not ignorant or fearful or people in wheelchairs I just ... wouldn't go out with them.

These responses astound me. Some of you are living in a complete fantasy world. By all means speak for yourselves but don't speak for everyone else.

I'm sure the answers would be very different if we were talking about someone with a heavy physical deformity.

'It's all about the person. You're just ignorant' :rolleyes:.

if they make you happy then yes

Was it a bottle of tequila you wanted in your life ambition? I can see you're halfway there. Keep going :thumbs:

this.

and the whole 'I met someone once and they were...' argument is incredibly valid. it's just a case of basic association. it's just like saying there was someone in your primary school who was horrible to you and now you take an instant dislike to anyone with their name (in my case its Kirsty). to make that an entirely trivial thing in comparison to people's experience of certain disabilities is just implying that by having a disability someone should be treated 'DIFFERENTLY'. which is what you're all arguing against. double standards <3

This thread is a bit of an eye opener, as some of the posts suprise me. I honestly cannot see a problem with dating someone who is wheelchair bound or even with other disabilities. It just would not faze me in the least if I loved them. We would just cope with what ever obstacles we might have to face, as they happened, same as a lot of people do in everyday life in all sorts of situations anyway. I suppose though it is individual choice and at least they are honest replies in the thread even if I can't understand where some are coming from. Each to their own and all that, it is after all their choice.

Sun? Star? the nowhere Post? The dole queue?

this thread is annoying me. people are so over sensetive about ****. if I was to say I don't find asian men attractive does that make me racist?

actually not over sensitive; overly cautious

Is it because they have small willys?