Nothing turns me on more than a good gimmick poster.

I really want to listen to Marvin Gaye now for some reason. That would set a mood.

i never question my sexuality, but i have had look's from gay guy's and comment's i take it as a compliment, if a nice person who is gay give's me the eye.

Why does everything you post have to end in a "sassy" gif? It's a tad annoying.


But yes, sex for just having sex is overrated. Much better to have sex with someone you actually connect with and spend a lot of time with as you get to know each other a lot and know what's good and what's not. I got over one night stands a few years ago. Waking up drunk, not remembering the sex, where I am or their name got pretty boring.

I struggle with your sexuality alot Ben :'(

get him drunk niamh:joker:, as he as said he wont remember in the morning:shocked:

Drunk sex is just awful. Not being able to have a clear memory of it, not being able to soberly take in every little sensation and what not ... alcohol just does nothing for sex. It's amazing that so many people are pissed when they have it off.

Stoned sex ... is another story.

Yeah, it's not a reason to post more. It's spamming. Please stop.

Grow a penis and I'm all yours, babydoll. ;)

Character posters are so ZzZzZz.

:laugh:

There was a time I struggled with it, and it was a pretty big worry. It once seemed like the most important thing in the world to me.

I've had two relationships with guys, and I think that confirmed to me that I wasn't hetro. But I still felt massive pressure to conform. I think life would be way easier being like most other people.

The only family member I've talked to in detail has been my sister, and she's been a massive help. And since I'm not dating anyone, I don't feel the need to announce my sexuality to relatives (even if I was, I think I'd keep it quiet).

I think I feel a bit like this. I'm not dating anyone so I haven't told my family. If I got into a relationship, then I think I'd tell them but I don't feel like I've "needed" to tell them at the moment.

I didn't know you spoke to your sister about it. That's sweet.

Don't know it it counts but I always have crushes on gay guys lol

I wouldn't say I've ever struggled, I struggled to come out to my parents and I don't know why because quite frankly, they were so supportive and I knew they would be. Ever since I've known though, I've accepted it and if people didn't, I'd move on with my life, I've never ever thought though (maybe once and only for a few minutes) that I wanted to be straight in life, I've always been comfortable.

Only in the sense of having to work out what the bloody hell I like :laugh: I seem to prefer guys in terms of physical attraction, i.e. most people I fancy (especially in the public eye) seem to be men, but with sexual and emotional attraction it's pretty much 90% towards women, which is quite confusing to say the least.

I've kind of just resigned myself to be open to anything. If I fall in love with a guy one day, so be it. I'll experiment with guys too at some point. I've given up on trying to define it, it's just fluid and I'm cool with it. For that reason I've never really felt the need to 'come out' as such, and so I've never really struggled with it in that respect, though I know that if I ever did fall in love with a guy then that'd obviously be the time to have to explain all...

I also don't see the point in labelling myself as anything either because it doesn't seem to be strictly defined for me as I've explained, but I just call myself bi because it's easier than having to explain all of this :p

You may have misinterpreted me there. I prefer girls almost always, including physical attraction.

Wow there are a lot of LGBT on this forum :P

Ah I see, sorry :p

No problem, fag :wink:.

thats not even funny:nono:

:joker:

Well if Jack finds it offensive I'll delete it, sweetheart.

It's a Big Brother forum, is it any surprise? :joker:

However though as much as i like men, i dont ever think i want to date and its really difficult. The thought of me succombing and allowing myself to completely be someones other half, makes me just feel ill, i just never want to give myself to someone.. and it's not just about being scared of getting hurt, which i am! i just could never desire to wanting to be someones forever.. and having that full time commitment which is just awful, i like my independence, and i just don't think id ever fit a relationship.
So in all honesty my feelings are pretty messed up but not sexually

no, its all good!, treacle

i'll second that

Also my OCD is so bad, and i think i'd always judge someone? id never feel they were good enough and im just too clingy id either be standoffish in an effort not to be.. or would just be an irritant
basically im not cut out to date someone, and thats just how it is :LL

Then pick somebody elses dick to sit on for the night.

your very young, and there is no rush, enjoy life, what will be will be.

I don't care about dating anyone. Like at all. I cant imagine myself being all cuddly with a guy nor can I imagine myself kissing one. But I could have sex with one easily. That's all I want from guys but with girls it's different. I'd be able to kiss/cuddle/do everything with girls.

Yeah definitely. I've bounced between thinking I'm all sorts of things and now have come to the (current) conclusion that I'm asexual-bisexual. I don't enjoy physical intimacy really, it's not something that I think about and I kind of hate it while it's happening, it's not really enjoyable for me. It makes it difficult meeting people. I came out to my parents as gay when I was in a gay relationship; my dad was very supportive but my mum's never really said that she's okay with it but they still love and support me in all my other endeavours so I don't think it's a big deal. I think she especially would be delighted if I settled down with a girl one day. I'm in a pretty good place right now, I'm very single, not attached to anyone emotionally and my life revolves around my academic pursuits, my job and my friends and family. I don't think I would be able to provide another person with a loving relationship at this stage in my life, I have too much that I want to do before I settle down in any way. I think it's perhaps better too, that I stay single for now, while I still work through my thoughts and emotions on the matter.

I really didn't think there would be such an overlap :P

A lot here to admire.

Last year was weird for me because I fell in love with someone practically at first sight who instead became my best friend. I chased her in a really lazy way for about two months before she gently pointed out to me that in all that time we had become best friends and it would be just bizarre to change that. I recognized this straight away and there was no 'getting over her' process we just became and still are pretty much platonic soul mates.

I knew in my heart it was never meant to be so I had no problem accepting that. A lot of people found this strange and thought I was being disingenuous with myself because for those two months I was in love with her I was sick. I was just out of this world depressed, stopped using the internet, and drank like a fish. I was in my own bed maybe twice a week tops, other times on friends floors and couches. I'd go for pints between classes and sometimes show up to some with vodka mixed with energy drink because I felt I'm awful and the only way to better this is to publicly put myself on display as the car crash I so desperately wanted to be.

But no I guess I just have that element in me that can get real with myself and switch taps off before the room floods up. That's why the past few months have been so much easier for me. I'm not touching love again for a very, very long time. I can't do all that again. I thought I wanted to be in a relationship for ages but now I've learned to separate physicality and emotion. I get and give all the love I need with my friends and family. Sex is just a fun distraction.

no bye

Honestly... I've put myself into a really, really messed up situation.

Some of you know I've been in a relationship with a woman for about 4 years. The biggest problem is that I've never really been in love with her, but she's crazy about me. Of course, the sexual attachment was there but I've been waiting and waiting for the emotional attachment to come along, but nothing. Realistically, my feelings towards her aren't really like a relationship, but a friend with benefits, and that's when it hit me.

A few years back I fell in love with one of my best friends (cliche, I know, but yeah...) and it was horrible. Why? Because it was unrequited; he's a straight male. This wasn't just a sexual attachment, but a serious, agonizing emotional attachment. I eventually got over that (after about 4 years...) and since then I could only develop an emotional attraction to males. I hadn't actually realised this fully until recently. Yeah I find women aesthetically pleasing but I don't feel like I could ever love one.

And this realisation has kind of ****ed me up big time. I always thought "Hey, I'm bisexual, I'll just ignore men and focus on women." But I can't do that. I'd never truly be happy, but given my family, my upbringing and being uncontrollably neurotic I don't feel that I'd be happy accepting what is what and being with a man. My Christian parents would probably disown me, I'd lose a LOT of friends (the majority being lads lads... I don't really fit in with girls/feminine people surprisingly), I'd lose my current girlfriend as a best friend for ****ing her up so badly, I wouldn't be able to have kids which is something I've always wanted, I feel like it'd affect my career and as silly as it sounds I hate having that label like there's nothing else to discuss about me.

And there's nothing I can really do. I'm sat here being a coward every day of my life, like I always have been and I'm just repressing it every day and ignoring it, because I've already got so much **** to deal with, but the more I leave it, the more I'm hurting myself and more importantly, the more I'm hurting her. It's so ****ed up and I know that I'm a really awful, awful person for having things the way they are, but I don't want to break her heart, because she's the best friend I could ever have and she's already gone through so much ****.

So to answer the question in short: Yes. In fact I don't have a clue what I am any more. I guess sexually I'm both ways but emotionally I've only ever found myself leaning one way. But I guess I need to sort things out soon and admitting it (here of all ****ing places) is my first step.

wow James, it takes some serious balls to admit that. I think I feel the same as you but the opposite...

You do know you'll have to tell her eventually. It sucks and it's a bitch to do, but maybe gradually become less and less attached to her? let her down slowly, you know? If you ever wanna talk to someone, feel free to message me. I'll be here for you :love:

You have to set yourself free James. You'll be setting her free too. Regardless of what she will think about you the fact is you've been living a lie for a very long time and that can't be healthy. There is no way I could have gone through with all of that. I respect that everyone is different though.

Chances are your parents will be fine with your sexuality. If they're not well then that's something you cannot control. Your friends I'm guessing will be fine with it too. Being a lads lad does not necessarily mean you have to be homophobic. If you do lose one or two friends ... well I wouldn't want to be friends with that person. Life is fucking long - that's what they don't tell you, everyone says it's short - and you'll have plenty of time to throw yourself out into the world to make better replacement friends. Career? Pfft. Labeling? That's a very interesting point but no. It's bollocks. You'll be more than just James-who-likes-the-boys.

I appreciate that you're in a very, very difficult set of circumstances but if you keep going the way you're going it'll never get better and it'll consume you the more you age. You need to take steps to change everything around. Show 'em where the power lies :blush:.

Thank you very much Caitlin and Stu :love: as stupid as it sounds I feel like just posting that here is a massive step... damn...