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-   -   Advice plz (Update...) (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=274211)

Fetch The Bolt Cutters 08-03-2015 12:31 AM

drag her

GypsyGoth 08-03-2015 12:52 AM

She sounds like such a nightmare, there must be something wrong with her.

Niamh. 08-03-2015 09:16 AM

Why has she said your sister can't go back to the house? And has your dad not said anything about that? I know I keep going back to him but wtf? You're his kids :/

AnnieK 08-03-2015 09:24 AM

Yeah...I'm in agreement with Niamh now. Your dad has got to sort this. It's not on at all. It sounds like she's waited until they are married and is now going to try and squeeze you and your sisters out. It's now up to him to put her straight and let her know that you and your sisters are part of him and she cannot control you. It's time to sit down with your dad alone and tell him exactly what you feel.

Ninastar 09-03-2015 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnieK (Post 7631588)
Yeah...I'm in agreement with Niamh now. Your dad has got to sort this. It's not on at all. It sounds like she's waited until they are married and is now going to try and squeeze you and your sisters out. It's now up to him to put her straight and let her know that you and your sisters are part of him and she cannot control you. It's time to sit down with your dad alone and tell him exactly what you feel.

Thank you :love:

I totally agree. It's just the wait until he actually gets back. His facebook is now not just his name, but now joined with his new 'wife'. She's putting all the pictures up of their wedding and them together and stuff. She is so seethrough, it's actually quite funny. Apparently my dad (which I know wasnt him) sent me a message saying 'I'm very disappointed in you, will talk when I am home' so god knows what she is going to pull on me now.

It's actually kind of funny how hard she is trying to push us away now. I'm stubborn when it comes to this though. There is no way I'm letting her push my dad away from us.

Marsh. 09-03-2015 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chaos (Post 7632865)
Apparently my dad (which I know wasnt him) sent me a message saying 'I'm very disappointed in you, will talk when I am home' so god knows what she is going to pull on me now.

I'd have exploded at her by now. But then that's probably what she's after.

Ninastar 09-03-2015 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marsh. (Post 7632871)
I'd have exploded at her by now. But then that's probably what she's after.

It is, and it's the only thing that's keeping me sane atm.

The worst thing is that my younger sister isn't coping with it very well. She's been in and out of hospital for the last 2 years and I'm worried that this is going to set her off again.

Smithy 09-03-2015 12:51 PM

Have you spoken to your dad about how your sister needs him to be there for her?

I don't get how he can be so blindsighted :worry:

Niamh. 09-03-2015 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chaos (Post 7632865)
Thank you :love:

I totally agree. It's just the wait until he actually gets back. His facebook is now not just his name, but now joined with his new 'wife'. She's putting all the pictures up of their wedding and them together and stuff. She is so seethrough, it's actually quite funny. Apparently my dad (which I know wasnt him) sent me a message saying 'I'm very disappointed in you, will talk when I am home' so god knows what she is going to pull on me now.

It's actually kind of funny how hard she is trying to push us away now. I'm stubborn when it comes to this though. There is no way I'm letting her push my dad away from us.

what would he be disappointed in you for?

rubymoo 09-03-2015 01:06 PM

I completely empathise with you and your sister.

The problem here is that your dad is in love (love is blind)

Your dad possibly see's you as grown up and that you have your own life, and he has his life.

This may sound harsh but i have seen so many men change completely over a woman, i've seen men so tight with their money become so generous with a new girlfriend, or they never took their dead wife out for a meal yet eat out regularly with a new girlfriend.

My dad pretty much abandoned me and my siblings when he met stepmother, and she is still one hell of a wicked bitch (she's the spawn of satan).

Sadly i have nothing to do with my dad and i refuse to go round to his house whilst she is there.

If you approach your dad will he side with you or her?

She sounds manipulative and wants you to play into her hands by wrecking your relationship with your dad......my advice......kill her with kindness, try to have a good heart when dealing with her, and reflect any negativity she aims at you back onto her, if she upsets you with snide comments, call her out on it straight away, with a ..."wow i find that comment really offensive/upsetting/uncalled for" if you do it enough she will stop.

Good luck to you, and remember, karma is a bitch!:wavey:

Niamh. 09-03-2015 01:10 PM

Good advice there Ruby :love:

rubymoo 09-03-2015 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7632947)
Good advice there Ruby :love:

Thanks Niamh:spin:

It's just my experience with some of the men in my life, one being my own dad, one being my dad in law, one being my brother-in-law, and one being my friends ex husband.

It seems with these men they just aim to please their new partners and to hell with everyone else, the sad thing is that ultimately they have missed out on their families (whether they be children or grandchildren).

And sadly they will end up very lonely old men, i'm a big believer in you reap what you sow.

Niamh. 09-03-2015 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubymoo (Post 7632983)
Thanks Niamh:spin:

It's just my experience with some of the men in my life, one being my own dad, one being my dad in law, one being my brother-in-law, and one being my friends ex husband.

It seems with these men they just aim to please their new partners and to hell with everyone else, the sad thing is that ultimately they have missed out on their families (whether they be children or grandchildren).

And sadly they will end up very lonely old men, i'm a big believer in you reap what you sow.

Indeed. I guess why I'd be so adamant in putting the blame on the dad rather than the new wife is because as a parent I could never imagine someone influencing my relationships with my kids in a negative way like that.

Crimson Dynamo 09-03-2015 01:51 PM

:fist: no woman will get between me and the small LT's


evil, wilful wicked things


and woman are no better

Niamh. 09-03-2015 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet (Post 7633007)
:fist: no woman will get between me and the small LT's


evil, wilful wicked things


and woman are no better

and rightly so, no man or woman should ever interfere with a parents relationship with their child, if they do they're bad but the parent is worse for allowing it, don't you think?

rubymoo 09-03-2015 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7632990)
Indeed. I guess why I'd be so adamant in putting the blame on the dad rather than the new wife is because as a parent I could never imagine someone influencing my relationships with my kids in a negative way like that.

I know what you mean Niamh, it's because we're women!

I always say to my hubby, "if you should ever meet anyone else, please always put our girls first"

I ask this of him because i also don't understand how as a parent you can turn your back on your kids regardless of their ages.

And with me being on the receiving end, i know how devastating it is not to have a parent in my corner.

rubymoo 09-03-2015 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet (Post 7633007)
:fist: no woman will get between me and the small LT's


evil, wilful wicked things


and woman are no better

That's good to hear, and the small LT's are the richer for having you in their corner:wavey:

Niamh. 09-03-2015 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubymoo (Post 7633023)
I know what you mean Niamh, it's because we're women!

I always say to my hubby, "if you should ever meet anyone else, please always put our girls first"

I ask this of him because i also don't understand how as a parent you can turn your back on your kids regardless of their ages.

And with me being on the receiving end, i know how devastating it is not to have a parent in my corner.

aww I don't know about that. My husband is an amazing dad, I know there's no way he'd ever put anyone before his kids ever. He also has a son from a previous relationship

rubymoo 09-03-2015 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7633028)
aww I don't know about that. My husband is an amazing dad, I know there's no way he'd ever put anyone before his kids ever. He also has a son from a previous relationship

I shouldn't make such a sweeping generalisation on this forum:worry::laugh:

My hubby is fantastic and i know he'd be there for our girls, and my hubby's grandad is always there for all his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren!

I think the men i refer to have trouble living without a woman, so they need to keep them sweet, and that's where the trouble begins, because then the woman can rule the man.

Marsh. 09-03-2015 02:04 PM

Yeah, I suppose I have experience on both ends.

My mother couldn't do enough for me and my sister and always fought to give us the best she could, we always came before anything else. I think she was a tad too selfless at times.

But our father put a lot of his own desires first. He'd go off and "live" his life the way he wanted without another thought for anyone else. Probably showing how he was too immature for kids at that point anyway. But that's another story. :laugh:

But I suppose the positive of that is I know damn well what kind of father I DON'T want to be should I have children one day.

Crimson Dynamo 09-03-2015 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7633019)
and rightly so, no man or woman should ever interfere with a parents relationship with their child, if they do they're bad but the parent is worse for allowing it, don't you think?

i do and it is a painful subject for me right now

:bawling:

Niamh. 09-03-2015 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marsh. (Post 7633039)
Yeah, I suppose I have experience on both ends.

My mother couldn't do enough for me and my sister and always fought to give us the best she could, we always came before anything else. I think she was a tad too selfless at times.

But our father put a lot of his own desires first. He'd go off and "live" his life the way he wanted without another thought for anyone else. Probably showing how he was too immature for kids at that point anyway. But that's another story. :laugh:

Atleast you had one parent who cared so much anyway Marsh. Sounds alot like my parents and me(and my brothers) actually

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet (Post 7633041)
i do and it is a painful subject for me right now

:bawling:

aw sorry to hear that LT, it can be worse for men when relationships break down, they don't have anywhere near as much rights to their kids as women do (here anyway) the laws need to move with the times

rubymoo 09-03-2015 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marsh. (Post 7633039)
Yeah, I suppose I have experience on both ends.

My mother couldn't do enough for me and my sister and always fought to give us the best she could, we always came before anything else. I think she was a tad too selfless at times.

But our father put a lot of his own desires first. He'd go off and "live" his life the way he wanted without another thought for anyone else. Probably showing how he was too immature for kids at that point anyway. But that's another story. :laugh:

But I suppose the positive of that is I know damn well what kind of father I DON'T want to be should I have children one day.



I also learnt from my parents what i didn't want to be:laugh:

Marsh. 09-03-2015 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Niamh. (Post 7633045)
Atleast you had one parent who cared so much anyway Marsh. Sounds alot like my parents and me(and my brothers) actually

Yeah, exactly. It's what makes me appreciate her more than I would have under normal circumstances I think.

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubymoo (Post 7633047)
[/B]
I also learnt from my parents what i didn't want to be:laugh:

:laugh:

Yeah, I'll end the cycle. :fist: I remember when he finally apologised and tried to make up for all his wrongdoings and it turned out he'd pretty much just gone and done what his own parents had done and it was pretty much all he knew to begin with. Didn't excuse it or make it better but it just shows how those early years can **** someone's life forever if they let it.

Crimson Dynamo 09-03-2015 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marsh. (Post 7633051)
Yeah, exactly. It's what makes me appreciate her more than I would have under normal circumstances I think.



:laugh:

Yeah, I'll end the cycle. :fist: I remember when he finally apologised and tried to make up for all his wrongdoings and it turned out he'd pretty much just gone and done what his own parents had done and it was pretty much all he knew to begin with. Didn't excuse it or make it better but it just shows how those early years can **** someone's life forever if they let it.

marsh do not fight the lothario that lies within you. you are a lover of women (and probably men :suspect:) and no single woman will ever tame you

its in your jeans



what a slut:fan:


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