| Redway |
08-12-2023 07:01 PM |
People using prayer as an excuse to gossip about people over things that aren’t currently confirmed to be true. Some of those Zoom Friday night calls can be brutal.
Stuff like that in general. Will Smith might’ve been wrong to engage in a punch-up at that awards ceremony but in general “keep my name out of your mouth” is something that’s important to remember when you’re talking to more than a couple of people at a time about someone you don’t necessarily even know that well.
A loose tongue stirs up conflict on the grounds of something that might not even be true or still relevant, and unnecessarily gives people the wrong impression about the gossipee if they believe it unquestionably. Say it in a closed circle of literally one or two people if you have to say it. Beyond that it’s not just healthy conversation or spiritual-welfare concern (or whatever the case may be). It’s talking too much and too indiscreetly and at that point you’re a gossip. It doesn’t matter how good your intentions are. That’s not the point. You’re taking out someone’s right to personal dignity for them and at your own indiscretion-behest just because you can’t keep your mouth shut. Some things are best left unsaid or said privately if it has to be said at all (like I say). Nothing wrong with a bit of healthy gossip at all but slandering people openly and making judgemental assumptions about people for all to hear is not healthy gossip, nor is it a Christian value (if this is coming from a spirit of prayer).
Someone who’s already a bit cynical through negative experiences or paranoid about people gossiping about them in the first place will take that and take it to heart if they overhear it, and they might not ever get over it fully. Some people have to sleep with fans on just to (besides canning out noise from louder people in the environment) stop all of that poison potentially coming to their ears because of how tough slandering can be on someone’s mental health. Talking indiscreetly about them under the guise of spiritual-welfare concern (and it might genuinely be that) or trash-talking openly just for the sake of it is just confirming what is already a jaded expectation for them and giving them more reason to cut people off and be bitter and cynical about putting their trust in people. So gossip discreetly if you gonna gossip and take whatever it is you think or you’ve heard with a pinch of salt if you don’t know the person that well. You might not mean maliciously but still shut up and keep the window closed instead of openly talking too much. If you then turn around tomorrow and try and pally up with/befriend them after dragging their name through mpoto-mpoto mud, you’re tapped. And the joke’s on you if they already know. Why would they want anything to do with you after that point if you’re not so close to them that they’ll be more inclined to look for reasons to forgive you?
Also. People who can’t do anything quietly. I tend to be wary of people who are very, very extraverted. If it’s not too much indiscretion in their talking and over-gossiping, it’s too much unnecessary noise and not being able to sit still or close a door quietly. And a general lack of respect for basic personal-boundary principles. It shouldn’t be hard to not get too close to a stranger when they’re walking or avoid honing in too intensely on a subject that’s obviously raw for someone just because you want to keep talking but a lot of people just can’t help themselves. And it’s suffocating to be around.
|
