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i believe you cant help who you love.
so being gay i dont believe would be a choice. |
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In fact, a lot of these studies were done by 'non-Freudian' psychologists and researchers over many decades and are far more 'common knowledge' in those fields than you know, but, I'm not surprised that you are surprised and think you just read some 'crazy crackpot thing'. You don't hear about this anymore. You sure as hell aren't going to see this discussed on any BBC documentary. Now you made up something and added it. You added this idea that someone wakes up one day and 'chooses to become a homosexual'. Nonsense. Nobody ever woke up and decided to have PTSD and just went to a crowded music concert and made themselves have a panic attack and flashbacks. Nobody just woke up one day and said "Oh here.. I will use controlling behavior on my family to compensate for my own traumatic upbringing". These things are through series of developmental steps and may not be found my most and could take years or decades or months. You asked 'where does bisexual fit in the spectrum'. It fits in the middle. |
For someone straight saying being gay is a choice is where this argument ended.
You are not gay, how the **** are you supposed to know if it is choice or not? |
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Here is an example.
I am gay. I am perfectly happy in my male body. I am attracted to male people just as straight males are attracted to female people. I had no choice in the matter, in fact it would make a lot of gay people's lives a whole lot easier in some ways if they were straight. I've skimmed through this thread and seen some claims that being gay is a choice. These are obviously straight people talking - they have absolutely no idea because they have not experienced being gay (because they are straight!), and so do not have a leg to stand on in that case. How would you even know?? I absolutely cannot believe some of the comments in this thread. Fair's fair, everyone's entitled to their own opinions. But some of the assumptions and blantant guesswork that some people are making completely astounds me. I'd like to end this post before I log off by reiterating this. I am gay. I am happy being male. I am attracted to men. I did not choose this because why would I? And I do not have a retardation of any form. Just to provide an example to those here who are suggesting otherwise. |
According to the Bible, God granted man free will. All we have to do is live a good life and we go to heaven. So there you go, be a good person and God will grant you the Kiingdom of Heaven. Be a bad person and its down you go, and you will be joined by Maggie thatcher, the current pope and his arch bishop, George W. Bush and Jedward.
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That hurts you. We call this 'close-mindedness'. Next.. how do you know I'm not gay? More interestingly - I could interpret your accusations as highly offensive to gays. How dare you say these people are incapable of making their own choices? How dare you suggest that 'nobody would choose being gay' which means you think it's a 'poor choice' or a 'lesser thing'. Do you think people who choose homosexuality are stupid and retarded because YOU think its a foolish or bad choice. You decided what people may or may not like?? I think you may be the most bigoted anti-gay opinion in here? Consider this (if you dare open your mind) A friend of mine came from a fairly normal family upbringing but sadly at about age 13 his parents divorced and there he had a lot of problems. I felt bad because the only thing that kid wanted was for his Dad to be a dad but the guy was just a harsh, unfeeling and emotionally 'dead' and often drunk bastard. (actually the only real 'attention' he got was when his dad got drunk and beat the hell out of him). Anyways. His mother and older sister took care of him and were not bad people at all but they were 'dominant' and you could say over-bearing and in some ways he was lost in that. He may be in the room and never noticed heh. Anyways. Now a few years later he moves away to university and although not unlikable he finds himself kinda lost, afraid, lonely, unsure.. nobody seems to notice him. He wasn't athletic or a 'geek' or really fit in much, shy. Dilemma. One part of him was almost 'furious' to blast out, be HIS OWN MAN! now was his time to fight for his own identity, YET, He was shy, awkward and unsure. OK. But his flatmate at Uni was outgoing, had a lot of male friends and they were unique, expressive and they were going out every night to 'gay bars' where they seemed to be having fun. They invited him. He can tell you he had no interest in 'gay sex' or ever considered it. It wasn't the interest. The attraction was actually having contact, relationships, fellowship with other men. Something he actually never had and always wanted. Add another thing: Now he was doing his own thing. for once. Finally. HE had his own group and identity - not his parents! When the drugs were introduced he found another way to deal with all that pain and became outgoing. He LIKED THIS! It was HIS CHOICE and he explained quite simply this helped him deal with his problems. Who are you to say he can't choose this? It helped fill a void he had with his father and it helped him escape problems of his mother. It helped him become someone unique and an 'individual' apart and he liked that feeling! So who are you to say he didn't choose that or he shouldn't choose that? It helped him. Now about 10 years later he is married to a pretty young woman. They have 2 children so far. Now he refers back to those 2 years in Uni as his 'dark days' but he doesn't resent anyone or anything either. He understands why he did it and why he eventually chose to do something else with his life. Who are you to say he is somehow unable to make choices for himself? |
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