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Right, might as well do mine then..

I'm Jake, 17 and currently live in Gravesend in Kent. Shorty after I was born my parents split up, which worked out okay as I have a lovely stepmother and two half-brothers. I've been brought up primarily by my mum, and she's done an amazing job really. We've never been in a good financial situation, which is hard but she does her best and I'm always happy to help her out with stuff.

We lost her mum and dad within two years of eachother. I took my nan passing hard, I was young (it was 2006), and we went to see her in the hospital. I then started doing worse in school, and along with this I tried being a vegetarian. The shock of my nan passing/me being there and not eating meat (according to the doctors anyway) caused me to start having panic attacks and I couldn't eat, I had this weird thought that I was going to choke on my food and started panicking whenever I ate. I became a stick, but thankfully with help and what not I got over the panic attacks, started eating meat again and got my life back.

Year 7/8 was ****, bullied most of the time over silly stuff, but in year 9 I really came into my own and made friends, and school was enjoyable. I did well at GCSE, got C's and B's, didn't do well in the first year at 6th form so I moved to college, which I'm still doing now. Moved place with my mum 6 months ago and live in a nice house. Do a part time job in burger king which isn't great but I've saved to go on holiday in August with my friends, should be a laugh :D I'm 18 in less than a week and I cannot wait for it now, gonna start driving so that should be good... yeah, me in a nut shell really :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by anne666 (Post 6096459)

Can I just say to all of you good luck and how brave to share the way you have xx

:xyxwave:Hello anne666,welcome to TIBB

Like Kate, I am humbled. I respect you all.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sooty (Post 6096943)

Like Kate, I am humbled. I respect you all.

We respect you too Sooty:hugesmile:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kazanne (Post 6096966)

We respect you too Sooty:hugesmile:

Kazanne:love:

There are so many wonderful people on this forum and this thread has taught me so much about people I have known for years yet I've never really known at all... :hug:!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kazanne (Post 6096817)

Jess?I take my hat off to you:hug:

:hug: :love:

conzers im loving the fact that u r reading every single post and commenting on them. Oh and ive never been called cool in my life so thanks for saying that lol
very good thread.

Ah go on then/

I'm Reece, 17 from a little coastal town called Seaham in North East England. :) I'm an only child and live with my mum and dog/cat (quite a lonely household), as my Dad left before I was born and hasn't bothered to contact me at all - yet can openly provides for his 3 daughters. So cannot stand him, I value my grandad as my real Dad as he's been there for me since day 1 and always comes over to get out of his shabby lonely bungalow. I'm in an awful council estate so time's can be quite rough but we pull through it.

Through school I sorta excelled, I've been through about 5-6 primary schools due to constant moving about.. Life got a bit wobbly after bullying through year 7 and 8 from the chavs, and I obviously did not fit in that whole clique so was sort of segregated with a few friends but this built and still to this day I've got a tight knit friendship group. I got through my GCSEs with mainly As and Bs so got onto to do A levels at sixth form which has probably been one of the most depressing years of my life, as I've struggled to defeat exam pressures leading me to crumble in my exams and getting Us and Ds in January but whilst doing 3 A levels I've also done a BTEC (ICT) along them which has been much more suited and I've found better for me, so I've discussed with my tutor and will be moving onto a full time one in September in Medical Science :)

I've become very self concious over the years as most of my friends have gotten in solid relationships and I've, most of the time, been the third wheel in many groups, so I pretty much hate my appearance but try to convince others that I don't. I've been told often I am funny to be around which makes me smile - and I enjoy making others smile :). I often hide my emotions in real life with having a strong exterior and having faced a lot **** through my life (mostly from mum's crazy ex-boyfriends... ). I'm often paranoid about whether I'm annoying someone and I have some anxiety issues, so I almost never pop up or start a conversation. But I never like to think about all these negative things and believe that positive thinking will always let you prevail and there's no point dwelling on stuff that's the past. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by reece(: (Post 6097340)

I'm often paranoid about whether I'm annoying someone and I have some anxiety issues, so I almost never pop up or start a conversation. But I never like to think about all these negative things and believe that positive thinking will always let you prevail and there's no point dwelling on stuff that's the past. :)

I can relate to everything you have said here! I also agree that negativity is really something that's not necessary in anyones life. :hugesmile:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jessica. (Post 6097643)

I can relate to everything you have said here! I also agree that negativity is really something that's not necessary in anyones life. :hugesmile:

:amazed:
**** happens, get over the negativity basically. As hard a challenge it is sometimes. :)

Im Rebecca age 26 and from a little town in north west England called Accrington which some of you might know from a well know milk ad about a football team.
When I was born I was born 3 months premature and also couldn't come home for 6 months after I was born. Currently I have been made redundant twice,once from woolworths and this year from a library I worked at, and am currently on trial cleaning an office and hope to be made permament soon until I can find something better. After all theres no jobs about I also went to university for 2 years but had to quit after my second year.
My dream job was to become an librarian and nearly got it sorting books and tidying but after getting made redundant the closest thing is to hope to work in some sort of book store. I love to read and write, watch tv, listen to music general things. I enjoy watching many US comedies, drama comedies, Coronation Street Neighbours, Waterloo road and anything really reality tv. I also enjoy watching many sports my faves include football tennis athletics but can watch any sport really.
I also am quite shy which is why I enjoy the internet to express my feelings as I think nobody knows the real me really.
Anyway hope you enjoyed that and hoped it wasn't too boring

Not read the whole thread, working my way through. Debating whether to participate. :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vicky. (Post 6095108)

This has been quite negative really..but I do enjoy life in general. Especially when I have had some codeine, which seem to work as antidepressants..I dont know if they are meant to. Was given them when I was taken into hospital not long ago with suspected appendicitus(turned out to be a cyst)..and now if I feel a bit down I have a couple and I'm much better within about half an hour

Oh bugger, don't go down that road they're highly addictive. The doctor banned my mother from them after 3 months because she was becoming too dependant.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy (Post 6095268)

Well seeing as we are sharing...
I'm a recovering alcoholic, it crept up on me from a few bevvies with mates gradually building up to drinking alone,
It severely affected my health and have had related problems since, but not touched a drop since 24th december so am well on the road to recovery.
I worked for yrs as a housekeeper in a hotel but left to get some GCSE's at 35.
I promised myself by 40 I would be educated, slim, sober, working and in a relationship...
Not quite there but ticking them off... :)

:hug: I'm glad things are turning around for you, you seem like a strong person (my perspective of you on the forum anyway).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Patrick (Post 6095561)

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, Sensory Processing Disorder and Aspergers - all within 8 months, after dealing with sever depression and prolonged insomnia the previous year.

I got picked on quite alot in school for being different, it wasn't until the final two years that people started respecting me for who I was and felt able to include me - the last few months of 2012, I was attacked numerous times in town - this ultimately has driven me to complete and utter paranoia, but I'm overcoming it now and hopefully, getting back to myself and hope to have a good summer.[/B]

Wow, I hope you're managing well. From personal experience depression is not at all good but to have it on top of everything else. I hope you manage to keep everything under control. :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jessica. (Post 6096692)

My name is Jessica, I am 20 years old. I live in the south west of Ireland and have lived in the same estate for my whole life. When I was just born my father was holding me and I basically died in his arms but luckily the doctors managed to resuscitate me, it was discovered I had fluid on the lung and was given three days to live, but miraculously I pulled through.

My father died on his birthday when I was three years old, for most of my life my mother was dishonest with me about how he died. She told me he fell into the river and drowned but I have only come to know and accept that he took his own life in the last few months. I have an eighteen year old half brother whom I don't have much contact with, again I don't know if my father cheated or if my parents had broken up at the time.

After my fathers death my mother went into severe depression, she would stay in bed all day and night for years only getting up to wake us for school or buy food, she missed all of my nativity plays and concerts and performances when I was in Primary school, I still have some resentment for that. We lost both of our parents instead of just one. My oldest brother, who is 10 years older than me, developed incredible rage problems and would occasionally beat me, my mother had to call the police on more than one occasion to save me from him because he couldn't control himself.

When I was 10 my sister had a baby and it changed all of our lives, my niece showed me that love exists and my mother realised that her family mattered and she wanted to be a good grandmother, she was 38 at the time, my life became so much more worthwhile after that, I didn't have any social skills since I barely had any human interaction apart from school for many years. My sister got pregnant again and when she was about 8 months pregnant with her second child she broke up with her boyfriend one night, he had been in and out of prison for assault and other things, he came to our house looking for her and we didn't let him in, so he stabbed the dog my niece got for her first birthday with a screwdriver, he tried and failed to break into our house while the whole family hid in terror upstairs.

I performed averagely in secondary school although I still didn't have any social skills, I found some people I was comfortable talking to, but never really could call any of them real friends. I got into a lot of trouble and got suspended every year of secondary school. I was never punished or disciplined by my mother of course, so I never respected any boundaries. I graduated when I was 16, since I had skipped a year in primary school and decided to take a gap year since I didn't get into the university I wanted. I used the internet very much in this time and joined TiBB etc.. The gap year turned into more than a year but I didn't really know what I wanted to do and I was quite happy to just do my own thing and enjoy time with my nieces and nephew.

In 2010 my sister got a new boyfriend, he did not treat her two children very well, for example my nephew was afraid of elevators and my sisters bf put him in an elevator alone and went up the stairs himself as a joke. My sister told me she was pregnant in July and I wasn't sure what to think of that. She said she was taking my niece and nephew on holiday to England for two weeks the day after that. When she got there she sent my mother a text saying she was never coming back, my whole world fell apart, I stayed in my room all the time crying and never went outside, I was in a very dark place, I couldn't look at anything that reminded me of them or I would cry uncontrollably, it was the hardest time of my life and I still get upset about the shock of it to this day. I saw the kids about 3 times since they were taken away. I had nobody to turn to irl but I had some really good online friends who helped me through a lot of stuff.

In April 2011 I started playing an online game and got very addicted, I made some friends in it and it took my mind off a lot of my problems. I made friends with this guy and we started chatting a lot, he was so kind and understanding, he made me smile when I didn't even know I was able. In June 2011 he asked me to be his girlfriend, I was hesitant at first but I felt something about him that I had never felt before. I began a long distance relationship with him and he changed my life, he fixed my heart. We had our two year anniversary this month and I am gonna fly to him for a week in August. I plan to move to Portugal for good as soon as we are both stable.

In March of this year my sister moved back to Ireland for good with her three children and left her abusive boyfriend who had changed my nephew to a shell of his old self, if he spilled water by accident or if he accidentally played too roughly he would cry to be punished because he thought he deserved it, I will never forgive my sister for allowing this to happen but all of the kids are improving very well and fitting in at their new school.

That is only that half of it really, there's a lot more I could say but I think this is long enough, I have a much brighter outlook on life now and I hope it will continue this way. :bigsmile:

I'm glad things are turning around for you. :hugesmile:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy (Post 6096864)

If we combined our life stories into a book it would be a bestseller..... Thank you everyone for your shocking, sad, heartwarming and honest stories.

:laugh: Who needs Big Brother when we have this forum?

Quote:

Originally Posted by 08marsh (Post 6097664)

I'm glad things are turning around for you. :hugesmile:

Thank you! :bigsmile:

when we ask the question who are we? do we simply answer , by stating the things that have happened to us, or do we state who we want to be and what we want to achieve too? It s a journey isn't it and we have to believe that as we live and learn we have it in us to try and create a better tomorrow.....as a man once said in all these experiences we have in this thing we call life, it is only the failures and the risk of failure that teach us how to become winners and to learn and grow

I'm Benjamin (aka Ben/ukturtle). 29 years old and currently reside in Bristol. For those that know me, know I love my travels, for those that don't, I have just returned from New Zealand after a year living and adventuring there. I have also travelled and lived in Australia and Asia a few years back and lived in Portugal.

I come from quite a well-off family. My father and two brothers (one older and one younger) passed away when I was a kid, leaving me, my mother and two younger sisters. I used to get on with my family but haven't seen any of them in about 5 years now. I have a good friend who I refer to as my sister (as she was there through a lot crap) and her kids call me uncle Ben.

I have been to university, passed A-levels, got 98% in my 11+, and I am pretty intelligent, but not always very good at showing it. I generally like to be a laugh, but can be prone to a little bit of anger now and again, as well as going through phases of being talkative and non-responsive. I have been engaged and it ended (several times) after my partner was violent towards me, however I can be a bit of a commitment coward since and now keep my distance from all men.

I've never really struggled with my sexuality, except that I can't have the "normal" wife and kids set-up, but I have suffered with an eating disorder when I was 17/18 and lost loads of weight.

I have a very curious and inquisitive nature and love to explore and ask questions, and I love playing games and using strategy to progress in them. I also like to host games and find inventive new tasks for them.

I also write poetry and stories, mainly sci-fi, and am aiming to get published soon (one day it will happen).

My biggest fear is dying before 30 like my father and I also have a fear of goats and maggots.

My favourite thing to do is stand outside in the middle of the night when the full moon is out and just watch the clouds roll past it and listen to the breeze. Failing that, when I'm hiking or just walking through a beautiful place with no people is when I'm happiest, free and most creative.

edit : on second thought, i'd rather i just say my name is karl and i am irish yaaa

Karl you are a good man :hug:

Ive just read through the whole thread and really some of you have had very interesting lives up to now but most of all its good to read that everybody's position right now is better than it had been in the past.

Jess your story is particularly quite inspiring, I hope Portugal works out.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kazanne (Post 6096813)

I was born in 1976,I was abandoned as a baby along with my brother and adopted by the best mother and father anyone could wish for,I was hospitalised quite a few times with hearing problems which left me partially deaf for life,I had an amazing childhood,loved school and always remember being happy,have no desire to find my birth mother,I found her once via the Salvation Army,she wrote me one letter and that was it so I never bothered again,(my dad died a few years back)1993 was a traumatic year for our family,I lived in New York for a while,I have a brother who lives there also,and another brother who is a firefighter,I also worked in Greece and Turkey. I married Jay 11 years ago we have three beautiful kids,and I am in a happy place ,we live in a nice area of Shropshire,so that's me in a nutshell,for a little abandoned kid it worked out very well,lol.

This made feel so sad but so happy at the same time Kazanne. For a little abondoned kid you did brilliant :bigsmile:

You're an amazing person Kazanne, and your experiences have made you the warm hearted, loveable lass I've gotten to know well. I'm proud to call you my friend :love:

....Awww, Karl I just don’t know what to say..this thread is really turning into something...how you could ever hate yourself when on this forum you are probably one of the most beautiful souls I have ever had the honour to ‘meet’ and I believe that in real life you are too...well, I know you are....but yeah, I truly believe that things are meant to be and that ceiling was telling you something..(probably that it was dodgy..) and really Karl you are meant to be here but I know how hard that must be for you sometimes because you hold your emotions inside and find it hard to release them...and you were never ever a ‘stupid stoner’ you were just consumed with those emotions and as you were lost as to how to let them flow and release from you, you tried to hide from them but we know that doesn’t make them go away and they're always there trying to break free because we can’t restrain anything so powerful inside us, it doesn’t disappear unless it’s allowed an exit...and your cousin..?..I’m so very sorry but don’t hate yourself, how could you possibly feel anything when you have no more room for emotions, you have a full tank of them already..that would just be too much for you...for anyone...you know Karl, I didn’t feel that much different to you when my dad died..he died suddenly. I never got a chance to say goodbye, just to make sure he never felt scared or alone because I just don’t know what happens when you pass away but all his life he was loved and it didn’t seem right if he felt alone at probably the most scary thing he ever had to face...and I was really stubborn and wouldn’t wait until they do whatever they do to people when they pass away and was going to tear that hospital down unless they let me see him the minute I got there and his face wasn’t calm or peaceful, it was how it was when he died, contorted and full of physical pain in those last few seconds..I think the noise that I let out probably shook the whole country but I never cried and later at the chapel of rest, when he was calm and peaceful, I still looked at him and thought this isn’t my dad at all, this is just an empty container that carried my dad, I don’t believe that the soul and spirit of someone ever dies, only the body... and that’s because everything they are, everything they meant to you, what they made your heart feel stays there with you forever...it’s just impossible for them not to be here anymore because they have touched hearts and souls in a way that will last forever...we carry their spirit with us always...that thing that makes their eyes light up, animates their voice..just everything they are..

..I don’t know Karl, maybe one day you will release those emotions, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll find a box inside you to keep them in but try not to ever be scared of them because they just need you to kind of say hey to them and let them get on their way and do what they need to do, once felt then they will never need to be felt again....Karl I just kind of think you’re pretty amazing, that’s probably all I needed to say....:hug:...

This thread really is something special the respect i hold for each and every person that has had the faith in tibb to be able to open up is enormous.
I cant do it i envy people brave enough to do it i bottle it up.
I have probably let my demons slip only once or twice since i have been a member here and then deleted the posts as quick as i wrote them.

Too many people have commented to quote each individual person - but i will quote.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zee (Post 6097244)

There are so many wonderful people on this forum and this thread has taught me so much about people I have known for years yet I've never really known at all... :hug:!

I never really knew everyones life stories and i guess its just bought us together in a sense on understanding.

You all are brave. Seriously - proud of my fellow members!

Princess, Anne, Jess, Ammi, Nathan, Kazanne, Jake, Kate, Reece, BigSister, Ben and Karl <3

So happy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Kate* (Post 6096742)

I'm undecided about whether to participate in this. I've unburdened myself on the forum in the past already so a lot of people know my basic story.

Conzors, you've started an amazing thread here though. It's eye opening and quite humbling.

There are a lot of amazing people here.

:love:

Aww thanks :D - It is really nice to see these things!
x

You're all very brave people, and it's so great to see what people you've all become despite the past. Karl, that roof falling was the biggest sign ever, and you was never ready to go then. From you to get from that dark place to where you are now is amazingly braze, you're a strong guy :)