It's like a 2013 version of stranger danger

If I asked her if I could have a taste of her large kebab do you think I'll get a slap?

Ask her next time, 'do you like medium or large meat :evilgrin:'.

At the very least:dance:

Ah who am I kidding, she is a chip shop girl and I'm just a lowly gardener, it was never going to be,


An ode to a chip shop lady;


Oh chip shop girl,
Your eyes were bright
Like Turkish delight
Or perhaps a Viennese whirl

Oh chip shop lady,
You gave me good meat,
You were ever so sweet,
If only I could give you my gravy

Did you want to poison me?
You gave me that food
I pictured you nude
But alas it was never to be.

Fin

:laugh2: a poetic masterpiece, I'm incredibly moved .. Sob.

enough to start working in a chippy:joker:

Don't laugh at me, I'm heart broken! An empty shell of a man with an empty kebab box to boot.


Cheer me up now! :devil:

I got a D in my deep fat frying classes in school. No reputable chip shop in the country would have me with those grades.

not you, kate.:joker:

The Gardener & The Chip Shop Girl

That's a film just waiting to be made

:cloud:

Awwwww. :hug: here, have a grape..

I'm available to play the gardener. And the chip shop girl must be fit, I'm talking Susan Boyle fit. Pure stunner. :dance:

It better be a red one.

I'll play the chip shop girl.

- chews gum and burps -

Nice one, are you partial to a spot of nudity? You know for the audience, not me. :whistle::whistle:

:nono:

Yep, just awaiting my infraction for that one. :blush:

I'm as pure as the driven slush I'll have you know.

I've got other titles for this film..

:devil:

Carry on Kebabing
Brokeback Sausage

I like. :joker:

Chippy off the old block.

Out of the frying pan...... And into her bed.

Lord of the onion rings.

riding the gravy train.

Working title - tales from the deep fat fryer

I'm off to give Peter Jackson the script he can make it into a trilogy. Hollywood here we come ya bastards!