Originally Posted by Z
(Post 6867511)
#34= – lily
Previous performance: #37
1st Round: 9 points || 2nd Round: 34 points || Total: 43 points.
Linda has gone by a variety of names in her time on TiBB. L, Stropz, Dark&Twisty, all sorts of multi accounts... but she’s probably best known as lily now. I speak to Linda off the forum quite a lot and have been friends with her for 9 years now which is quite a long time really. She ties at 34th, so let’s look at why you gave her your points.
• “Her breasts are neither small nor humble, they are mountains.”
• “My rock. She's been a solid friend to me for all these years and I think we have so much in common that sometimes it scares me a little bit. I'm glad she's posting more frequently again!”
• “you make me feel like loving you with a little L... was that how the song went? idk. Linda makes my knees go weak. She makes me carry her when it's raining. Hahahahahaaaaaaa. But no in all seriousness I'm going to ruin her marriage and jump in as a replacement.”
• “Lily takes no crap and she takes no prisoners. You’ll never see Lily post that she’s fierce, or that she speaks her mind, or that she’s not afraid to voice her opinion. She doesn’t say any of that hackneyed old crap because she doesn’t have to. I was here a long time before she and I became friends. I find myself enjoying the company of, and gravitating toward, the intelligent and amusing people on this forum, and lily is both of those things, so I can’t think why it took us so long. Stick around more Lily, this forum is a much nicer place with you in it.”
#34= – Dezzy
Previous performance: #26
1st Round: 9 points || 2nd Round: 34 points || Total: 43 points.
Dean is one of the best members on TiBB. With his beautiful singing voice and his almighty ban hammer, I’d like to see you claim otherwise. He gives me the collywobbles in my funny places. Dezzy’s a useful addition to any pub quiz team in the Video Games round, a force to be reckoned with in TiBB Eurovision and one of TiBB’s esteemed moderators.
• “he might have finished lower if he'd sent in his supposedly sub-par Eurovision entry already but for now I'm keeping him in high faith. One time, at band camp, he fingered me with a bassoon.”
• “TiBB rumour has it that Dezzy was taken to TiBB Towers as a young child to protect his virginity as there has been no goddess on TiBB as beautiful, rare or lovely as he is and when his beauty was predicted (circa January 2007), the prophesy said that the Nailsworth Simps would one day come for him. Anyway, I’ve run out of steam with this story but what I do know is that the scheming and despicable Z transformed himself into a golden crab and one night crept sideways into the Tower bedroom of the untouched Dezzy and impregnated him and then, shamed by his desire, fled the Towers in disgrace to become an ordinary member forever walking in the shadow of the land of infractions and leaving poor Dezzy ‘spoilt’ for anyone else and the chance of true love. So because of this tragic story of single parenting and unwanted motherhood/benefits etc and also because I just think he’s the most fabulous person ever and someone who is just really wise and wonderful, I find myself writing this little thing for Dezzy, spectacular, delicious and delightful Dezzy (with a little mention to his bastard daughter Shaunica, who has been informed there will never be a place in Towers for because of the shame her presence brings to her mother).”
• “I have an enormous and sadly unrequited crush on Dezzy. He is spit-your-drink-out funny, and conversely, can stop a troll in their tracks with one mighty brandish of his magnificent Ban Hammer. He’s too fabulous for words and my heart – and all my other bits and pieces – belong to him entirely.”
• “anyone who buys Pokemon X and Y is a saint in my eyes”
Still remaining: Ammi, AnnieK, Benjamin, Black Dagger, Brother Leon, chuff me dizzy, Drew, GypsyGoth, Hayden, Jack_, Jake, joeysteele, Jordan, Josy, Katherine, Kazanne, Kizzy, Kyle, Lee, Livia, Locke, MeMyselfandI, MTVN, Nathan, Niamh, Ninastar, Novo, reece(:, Salman!, Saph, Shaun, Smithy, Z.
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