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-   -   Would you date someone in a wheelchair? (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=176086)

cub 21-05-2011 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN (Post 4255022)
The principles the same, if you're going to criticise people and preach the principle of "it's the person, not the chair" then that has to apply all the time, you cant mitigate it & then suddenly ignore it because you think being a midget is more of a turn off than being in a chair. If you're going to apply that principle than at least be consistent, otherwise you're just showing double standards.

I am being consistant. You cannot compare a midget and a deformity with a person is a wheelchair. One size doesn't fit all in this case.

I probably wouldn't be sexually attracted to a midget or a deformed person because of basic aethetic reasons. But a person in a wheelchair is different. If they were sitting on a bar stool you wouldn't know the difference until they moved away from the bar - same with a blind person, hense the example of a clip.

Sorry, if the clip caused amusement. It was the only one I could think of. Although I was amused by the reaction.

Stu 21-05-2011 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cub (Post 4255044)
I probably wouldn't be sexually attracted to a midget or a deformed person because of basic aethetic reasons. But a person in a wheelchair is different.

For you.

cub 21-05-2011 02:58 PM

Image the character of Chris Tate or Jackson in Emmerdale as another example.

cub 21-05-2011 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stu (Post 4255067)
For you.

Why for me?

Stu 21-05-2011 03:01 PM

I'm just saying that is your opinion. And probably the opinion of millions of others, sure, but everyone has a different sense of aesthetic, y'know. I can see where you are coming from but you are only speaking from your own standpoint at the end of the day.

I'm sure there's someone out there who would hop into bed with a walking midget faster than they would a non walking non midget. You can't just draw these easy conclusions about the way people see and feel about things.

cub 21-05-2011 03:22 PM

Again, you are comparing a midget with a wheelchair-user.

I am suggesting a person you would be attracted to but the only concession is a wheelchair.

Like everyone else, I don't know how to express an opinion other than my own.

Zippy 21-05-2011 03:23 PM

Midgets are damn hot

just saying

Stu 21-05-2011 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cub (Post 4255132)
Again, you are comparing a midget with a wheelchair-user.

I am suggesting a person you would be attracted to but the only concession is a wheelchair.

Like everyone else, I don't know how to express an opinion other than my own.

I'm only using midgets as an example because you mentioned them in your post. You wouldn't be sexually attracted to a midget. Some people aren't sexually to people in wheelchairs. It doesn't matter if you think they look fine they just happen to be in a wheelchair. That's your sense of aesthetic. Other people will see things differently. I'm all for voicing your opinion but your posts make it sound like you are utterly aghast at the concept that people can't all see things your way and you really can't seem to accept that the inclusion of a wheelchair would prevent someone from making a move on the girl/boy whatever.

It's not just limited to aesthetic either. Sorry but when I think of a relationship with a woman I think of holding hands, having a walk in the park, a cheeky roll around in the grass, those sorts of things. That's what I want and I wouldn't settle for anything less.

Sounds harsh but c'est la vie. There's plenty of fish in the sea for wheelchair users to hook up with. Likewise there's plenty of fish in the sea for me and I want to pick one of the ones that can swim.

MTVN 21-05-2011 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cub (Post 4255044)
I am being consistant. You cannot compare a midget and a deformity with a person is a wheelchair. One size doesn't fit all in this case.

I probably wouldn't be sexually attracted to a midget or a deformed person because of basic aethetic reasons. But a person in a wheelchair is different. If they were sitting on a bar stool you wouldn't know the difference until they moved away from the bar - same with a blind person, hense the example of a clip.

Sorry, if the clip caused amusement. It was the only one I could think of. Although I was amused by the reaction.

They're all physical things though, which might mitigate against someone's desirability. So are you now saying that it's not all "about the person" as you were saying earlier? Seems it. And like Stu pointed out, attractiveness is all subjective in any case.

A wheelchair is a big hindrance, more so than you seem to want to admit. Why didnt you quote the second part of my post? A lot of things I'd like to do with someone I'm going out with I couldnt do with a girl in a wheelchair and consequently.. I'd rather not date one. It's as simple as that really and I dont know why you're getting so sanctimonious about it.

Vicky. 21-05-2011 04:02 PM

If I fancied him, yeah I would think so.

Hard to say without being in the situation though really

cub 21-05-2011 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN (Post 4255151)
They're all physical things though, which might mitigate against someone's desirability. So are you now saying that it's not all "about the person" as you were saying earlier? Seems it. And like Stu pointed out, attractiveness is all subjective in any case.

A wheelchair is a big hindrance, more so than you seem to want to admit. Why didnt you quote the second part of my post? A lot of things I'd like to do with someone I'm going out with I couldnt do with a girl in a wheelchair and consequently.. I'd rather not date one. It's as simple as that really and I dont know why you're getting so sanctimonious about it.

Of course a wheelchair is a hindrance. For the user and the person with the user. Sadly the user can't walk away or have a break.

I probably didn't quote the second part of your post because I didn't disagree with it, whatever it was.

I'm saying you have to see beyond the wheelchair. An attractive person is an attractive person, wheelchair or not. It's quite different from a deformation, which is why I won't compare them. You may want to because it strengthens your argument. I've mention 'the person on the bar stool' three times now and no one has challenged it.

You're suggesting a person is unattractive in a wheelchair?

Why am I getting sanctimoniuos? I'm exercising a point of view, that's all.

I'm not saying you should date a wheelchair-user. I'm only discussing why one wouldn't. It's a topic that interests me.

Why be so offended by my opinion? I didn't start the thread.

cub 21-05-2011 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stu (Post 4255138)
I'm only using midgets as an example because you mentioned them in your post. You wouldn't be sexually attracted to a midget. Some people aren't sexually to people in wheelchairs. It doesn't matter if you think they look fine they just happen to be in a wheelchair. That's your sense of aesthetic. Other people will see things differently. I'm all for voicing your opinion but your posts make it sound like you are utterly aghast at the concept that people can't all see things your way and you really can't seem to accept that the inclusion of a wheelchair would prevent someone from making a move on the girl/boy whatever.

Not aghast at all. I find this debate interesting, but there is some ignorance around disabilities. I've no axe to grind. Surely if someone is attractive they are still attractive in a wheelchair. Only prejudice gets in the way of that? 'The way it looks'.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stu (Post 4255138)
It's not just limited to aesthetic either. Sorry but when I think of a relationship with a woman I think of holding hands, having a walk in the park, a cheeky roll around in the grass, those sorts of things. That's what I want and I wouldn't settle for anything less.

You can do all that with a disabled as well as an able bodied woman.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stu (Post 4255138)
Sounds harsh but c'est la vie. There's plenty of fish in the sea for wheelchair users to hook up with. Likewise there's plenty of fish in the sea for me and I want to pick one of the ones that can swim.

Because - obviously - if a person is in a wheelchair they can't possibly swim. All wheelchair-users are the same of course...

Captain.Remy 21-05-2011 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cub (Post 4254958)

That is so sad to read. I hope your attitude will change as you grow older. Just imagine if something should happen to you and you encountered someone with that opinion.

Sad? Why? Because I've got the balls to say I'm not attracted to this? That I don't want this kind of drama in my life?
Trust me, I've done some crazy shit in my life but this, dating a disabled person, is out of question. It's not happening. Too much drama, too much caring.

And what about daily life? Nah it's too complicated to deal with. Hospitals and stuff are made for these people.

King Gizzard 21-05-2011 04:46 PM

I wouldn't actively go out and find a person in a wheelchair, no. But if the person I was with had an accident and was wheelchair bound then I'd still go out with them for sure

Wouldn't judge anyone who wouldn't really.

cub 21-05-2011 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Captain.Remy (Post 4255250)
Sad? Why? Because I've got the balls to say I'm not attracted to this? That I don't want this kind of drama in my life?
Trust me, I've done some crazy shit in my life but this, dating a disabled person, is out of question. It's not happening. Too much drama, too much caring.

And what about daily life? Nah it's too complicated to deal with. Hospitals and stuff are made for these people.

Sad only because you said this ...

Quote:

I don't give to charity or anything. It's not in my nature to help people.


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