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Penguins can't fly. I can't fly. Therefore, i am a Penguin.
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Being a top neighbour and turnin the tunes up so next door can hear.
Scotland, where ''Moan then.'' is an invitation to battle. |
Do double chins run in your family? Oh I'm sorry, no-one runs in your family.
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The awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.
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LOL
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Being Unprepared And Feeling Under Pressure At The Drive Through Speaker
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"Being Fluent In Parseltongue Because You're Such A Snake."
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Dear Mario I Wasted My Whole Childhood Saving Your Girlfriend
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Putting a condom on your head so you can mind-f u c k someone.
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Some people are like clouds. Once they **** off its a great day.
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Throwing everything off the bed onto the floor when you return hammered
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Losing ur mum in the supermarket and accepting the fact that ur gonna die
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Sometimes, when i close my eyes, i can't see.
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Sometimes when i'm bored i go into my room and pretend i'm a carrot.
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You know the economy`s in trouble when America`s main export is tweets. |
The moment you realise Liam Neeson isnt actually God
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If actions speak louder than words, why can't I hear mimes?
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'Here we ****in' go' - Scotlands excuse for not knowing the words to a song
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Waking up & checking your FB like its the morning paper
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All these riots its clear whats happening, Voldermort is BACK.
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quick get harry to save us
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