Originally Posted by Lee.
(Post 5885957)
Just whilst you're all viewing this thread, we have an announcement to make...
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Here at the Leeberal Democrats we pride ourselves on fighting for you. We've spent years listening to your concerns, your needs and your opinions, and we are standing in this election with a view to making sure that your voice is heard.
Trust is a key factor with the election of any public official, and there are none so trustworthy as Lee. As the three time winner of the TiBB Pub Quiz and member of the prestigious MTV's Jusy and the Happy Turtles, Lee demonstrated a broad knowledge and awareness of the world around her. As the participant of In Cold Blood II, she summoned the outpouring of literally dozens of TiBB citizens to protest her innocence. As a regular part of your Most Loved top twenty members, Lee proves she has the support and admiration of literally thousands of spambots and/or members.
The Leeberal Democrats stand in an awkward position on a Big Brother forum: unlike the narrative of the George Orwell utopian classic, we stand for freedom of expression, absolution from prejudice and the fight for a fairer forum. We've listened to some of the most common complaints about the forum and we promise, if elected, to enact the following:
1) ******** will be banned from playing Brandon Flowers' solo material, to make penance for the time Lee left him on repeat one night.
2) Prior to registering, all members (and spambots) will be asked to name their favourite fruit. Bots will get confused and explode, and trolls don't eat fruit.
3) A relationship between TiBB and http://www.omfgdogs.com/ will be formed, and we will serve as sister sites.
4) The dead and redirected forums will be moved or deleted or decorated with hot men until deletion or movement.
5) The subforum logos will be replaced because they is some fug craycray.
6) The option to "like" posts will be installed, and at the end of the year a "Post of the Year" award will be handed out during TiBB's annual awards season.
7) A small statue of Marc will be erected in Slippery Rock, Pennsylvania.
8) To curb the constant arguing in the chat threads, a naughty step thread will be created where temporarily "cooling down" members (like a ban, but only for an hour) are isolated to post in, will be opened in a private forum. An automated TiBB account will post relaxing music videos and funny, harmless jokes whilst they wait.
9) (in tying with the logo being a star), a new star discovered in the universe will be named Leeroy and we'll monitor its progress over the years. This will be funded by wealthy TiBB entrepreneur and astronomer Sticks. We believe this will create a sense of unity about the forum.
10) For April Fool's Day 2013, James (admin) will insert a series of weird and unusual filters, like little easter eggs throughout the day, whereby members typing normal everyday words and phrases will be replaced by silly stock photos. For example:
Social Policy
The great Lee herself once said:
This clear open-mindedness to phalli of all races and creedence demonstrates Lee's fair and equal approach to penis-worship. If elected, the Leeberal Democrats will continue to fight for racial, gender and sexual equality. We are adamant supporters of gay marriage, and whilst that would appear to be available in the UK, as a global website we shall lobby at international institutions such as the UN, EU and NATO for the furthering of women's rights, racial tolerance and same-sex partners. In our foreign diplomacy with nations deemed to have an unacceptable attitude and unethical treatment of minorities, we will pressure and - in extreme circumstances - withdraw from such ties.
In appreciation of chocolate brown penises, we shall personally hand-deliver an Easter Egg to each and every TiBB member this Easter. We appreciate that, as strictly a Christian festival, this may alienate some members of another religious leaning, and therefore we shall do this on a different day to Easter Sunday.
Local Government
A great number of problems raised by you are concerning the approach to TiBB authority and the furore and controversy with which TiBB meetings are held. As outlined in our 10-point plan for TiBB above, we shall introduce a cooling-off period for an hour. In addition to this, we promise to introduce Moderator Elections. We believe it's about time we found a new administrator of TiBB, and those moderators who wish to stand for the position will be subject to a forum-wide vote. We have constructed a severance package for Mark that involves him spending the rest of his life drinking rum in a hammock in Trinidad, and, thanks to the generous donations of our party members, we can fund this and his replacement with party funds.
Some of our constituents have stressed the need for a Technology forum and separate Films and Video Games forums - we believe that such easy measures can be enacted to countless beneficial effects, and we promise to do that within the first year of power.
We vow to honour the moderator Vicky's baby with a statue of Madonna erected somewhere over the Music subforum. The words "come on vogue let your body go with the flow you know you can do it" shall be engraved, subject to fundraising.
Economy
The TiBB forum is falling apart. Reports of members being struck in the back of the head by falling Shanessa BB8 subforum letters, and tripping over Hell's Kitchen threads, have gone on too long. We need to raise TiBB income, and we've outlined the following plans to help us achieve that goal:
1) A deal shall be struck with Channel 5 with the hope of providing Big Brother exclusives on the forum. We shall lobby for the installation of partial live feeds on the website, that members can subscribe to, with a small fee to pay for administration costs.
2) One-off events and interviews will be conducted with former and current Big Brother stars in an all-new TiBB App, which we plan to release for the cost of £3.99. Users can then pose their own questions and send messages to the stars of reality TV.
3) TiBB-branded t-shirts, baseball caps, wristbands and badges shall be created as the start of a commercial branding campaign of TiBB to raise awareness and funds.
4) Advertising deals are currently left to a randomised outsider client. A separate TiBB team shall liaise with online businesses, reality TV shows and other media sources to secure more relevant and appealing forum adverts.
5) Ben and Scott will solicit themselves in the TV Chat forum on alternating weekends. Funds raised from their services shall go towards repairing the forum skins.
Other Policies - An investigation shall be started into the origins and current whereabouts of KathyIsASexyBitch
- On Wednesdays forum members will be required to wear (something) pink.
- For every five thousand posts a member makes, one member of the moderating team will perform a small song or rap verse for them by PM.
- Nathan is fit
- A movie detailing the life story of arista, with Daniel Day Lewis as the title role, shall be commissioned.
- Every now and then, when she least suspects it, GypsyGoth's posts will appear in Hebrew.
- A special guest moderator on Halloween this year shall be Niamh's husband!
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We would like to thank you for taking the time to learn about our policies. If you have any questions you can contact our press team by Private Messaging Josy with the subject title "Leeberal Democrats". Alternatively, you can follow us on Twitter: @leebdems or our Facebook page.
If you believe in a fairer TiBB, vote Lee in the TiBB Elections.
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