ThisisBigBrother.com - UK TV Forums
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ThisisBigBrother.com - UK TV Forums (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/index.php)
-   Chat and Games (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=41)
-   -   My girlfriend... (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=124846)

Captain.Remy 19-12-2009 05:43 PM
My girlfriend...
 
"My girlfriend is a porn star.

She is going to be so pissed off when she finds out."

I love Sickipedia. It's the future. :laugh::hugesmile:

Jack_ 19-12-2009 05:44 PM
Sickipedia is my life :love:

Captain.Remy 19-12-2009 05:47 PM
My current fave:

"No Youporn I do not want to play poker, I'm at work."

Z 19-12-2009 05:50 PM
I love Sickipedia. I went off it when I told some of my friends about it and then they all went overkill with it, kind of ruined it for me, but they've stopped going on about it so I use it more now.

"I remember the first time my parents caught me masturbating. I was so startled I nearly dropped their wedding photo." muahahahah.

Captain.Remy 19-12-2009 05:51 PM
Some of the MJ jokes are nasty tho lmao You just can't help laughing.

Jack_ 19-12-2009 05:51 PM
Quote:
what is 12" long and makes a woman moan all night?

Cot death.
Quote:
i'm josef fritzl and no windows was my idea.
Quote:
i'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow.
I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels.
I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and, while in the bank, i'm going to **** the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, i'll take a **** on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock.

Let's see crimewatch ****ing stage a reconstruction of that.
:joker: :joker: :joker: :joker: :joker:

Patrick 19-12-2009 06:39 PM
^^
Lmfao

I havent been on this, or heard of it..but is it like a Joke Site?

Tom 19-12-2009 07:19 PM
One on the first page

Joe McElderry:
"I'm straight - and I don't fancy Cheryl!"

So you're gay then?

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:23 PM
pmsl

Smithy 19-12-2009 07:24 PM
lmao
i remeber hearing about this from some woman who i worked with in an office and shes like 38, i was thinking how do u know about this and i didnt???!?!?!?!!?!

Ross 19-12-2009 07:26 PM
What's Susan Boyle and me got in common?

We both look **** dressed as a woman.

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:28 PM
So Joe McElderry has admitted that he is a virgin.

It could have all been so different if Louis Walsh had been his mentor.

Jack_ 19-12-2009 07:31 PM
Quote:
I was checking into a hotel the other week. At the counter, a guy in front of me said curtly to the receptionist, "I hope the porn channel is disabled."

Unbelievable what some people are into.
Quote:
Zebo, a half blind 5 year old African orphan has to ride 7 miles a day to school with only one leg on a bicycle with buckled wheels and no brakes.

Please give just a small donation of £2 and we will send you the video; it's fucking hilarious!
Quote:
Disabled toilets.

Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in.*
*No offence intended.

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:35 PM
LMAO JACK!

:joker:

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:41 PM
Day 1 in heaven and Jade Goody is already up for eviction.

CaraRawr 19-12-2009 07:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tom (Post 2776649)
one on the first page

joe mcelderry:
"i'm straight - and i don't fancy cheryl!"

so you're gay then?
don't bring my bb joe into this. </3

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:55 PM
Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents?
"He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter."
"Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family."
"They died together, the perfect couple till the end."
Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife.
Kind of makes me immortal.

Tom 19-12-2009 07:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephanie (Post 2776698)
Day 1 in heaven and Jade Goody is already up for eviction.
:laugh2:

Ross 19-12-2009 07:56 PM
Try saying "Whale oil beef hooked" without sounding like an Irish man swearing.




Creased. :joker:

Stephanie 19-12-2009 07:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ross (Post 2776738)
Try saying "Whale oil beef hooked" without sounding like an Irish man swearing.




Creased. :joker:
i don't get it LOL.

EDIT: OH PMSL I GET IT NOW/

Jack_ 19-12-2009 07:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephanie (Post 2776734)
Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents?
"He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter."
"Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family."
"They died together, the perfect couple till the end."
Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife.
Kind of makes me immortal.
:joker: :joker:

Jords 19-12-2009 07:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ross (Post 2776738)
Try saying "Whale oil beef hooked" without sounding like an Irish man swearing.




Creased. :joker:
Hahaha! That is great :laugh:

Smithy 19-12-2009 08:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ross (Post 2776738)
Try saying "Whale oil beef hooked" without sounding like an Irish man swearing.




Creased. :joker:
it doesnt really work for me :(
even though i get the joke

Stephanie 19-12-2009 08:00 PM
A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub.
She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men".
So he stabs her & nicks her purse.

Jack_ 19-12-2009 08:01 PM
Quote:
Jade Goody wanted to be cremated, so that at her funeral everybody could take home a Goody bag.
Quote:
Apparently you can get swine flu by fucking an infected pig.

Jack Tweed must be ******** himself.
:joker:


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