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Maru 01-02-2018 09:37 PM

Sexuality
 
For me it shouldn't be the least bit surprising that people who are very orthodox would not want to keep hearing about other people's sex life(s)? I think that may be part of the Ann's dysfunction that people need to rub this in your face ever so constantly... she is at the very least a prude.

I had a family member that was staunchly anti-sex ("Men only want sex!", etc) after poor experiences with those topics growing up. They were alone and vastly unaware of the joys of the human touch and that humans can have good outcomes romantically.

I think anyone who is repressed, they're not going to be a fan of the subject and anything that rebukes their sterile/innocent-minded perception of how human beings should behave will rub them the wrong way.

I don't think Ann's problem is just with homosexuality, but with human contact and the concept of a healthy happy romantic relationship in general. She can't see past people's more selfish/baser motivators... she likely thinks it will always lead to sin in one form or other, and that things like even dancing can lead someone astray in a major way. Some Baptists are like this and that simple things like trying to get them to open up about their feelings or to dance, even sing would make them feel far too vulnerable... being in those situations are quite uncomfortable for them I think.


Alf 01-02-2018 09:41 PM

She was a politician, she would have hired a gigolo or two in her day, I have no doubt.

supernoodles! 01-02-2018 09:43 PM

If any other housemate had said or acted the way Anne has in bob they would have been kicked out by now

supernoodles! 01-02-2018 09:44 PM

Bb not bob fgs

smudgie 01-02-2018 09:46 PM

Can't say dancing bothers her. She was in strictly after all.
I can see how she lives her life by her religious values, I can only admire her ability to do so.
No way could I .:blush:

Maru 01-02-2018 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by supernoodles! (Post 9842555)
If any other housemate had said or acted the way Anne has in bob they would have been kicked out by now

How is this on topic? :laugh:

Jamie89 01-02-2018 09:58 PM

I agree with what you're saying but the problem with Ann I think is that it's not just a problem with hearing about sex lives when it comes to homosexuality. I don't think she likes hearing about homosexuality full stop whether it's sex being discussed or not. Like when she rolled her eyes at Shane mentioning his sexuality... he wasn't actually mentioning anything to do with sex or relationships, just general experiences in life relating to his sexuality, but sexuality isn't just about sex. I think her problem with homosexuality probably extends beyond just her prudish nature in general.

poppsywoppsy 01-02-2018 10:02 PM

I think you do Ann a miservice.

Who said she has to be how others think she should. She has shown she is very much her own person. She has cuddled a lot in the BB house.

In her previous career, I doubt she ever cuddled anyone because it just wasn't done.
This is a new phenomena, mainly with a younger generation, not hers.

She has been totally removed from her comfort zone, made to co habit with people below her intellect and raring for a fight. She has handled them all. She hasn't sworn, lost her temper or acted in a way she didn't want.

I honestly think she had the patience of a saint. If some of these housemates were out of their comfort zone, say in a care home environment with elderly people, they most probably would wak because they didn't have the stoicism that Ann has showed.

Marches 01-02-2018 10:03 PM

It’s literally not about homosexuality she rolls her eyes at literally every intimate moment anyone has in that house

Jamie89 01-02-2018 10:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marches (Post 9842632)
It’s literally not about homosexuality she rolls her eyes at literally every intimate moment anyone has in that house

Mentioning homosexuality isn't an 'intimate moment' though, as in she rolls her eyes at intimacy between anyone gay or straight, and she rolls her eyes at the mention of homosexuality. When she rolled her eyes at Shane J he wasn't discussing anything intimate. Her problems with intimacy and homosexuality aren't part of the same thing, they're separate things.

Vicky. 01-02-2018 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamie89 (Post 9842681)
Mentioning homosexuality isn't an 'intimate moment' though, as in she rolls her eyes at intimacy between anyone gay or straight, and she rolls her eyes at the mention of homosexuality. When she rolled her eyes at Shane J he wasn't discussing anything intimate. Her problems with intimacy and homosexuality aren't part of the same thing, they're separate things.

There was no eyeroll at Waynes letter from his partner (or husband? Not sure which) though. I think its Shane J she has an issue with tbh. Not him being gay. She rolled her eyes at Ashley when Ashley kept going on and on about something too. Seems she just eyerolls as a natural reaction to someone rambling (I don't think Shane was rambling as it was a nice moment, but I know you know what I mean :p )

Jamie89 01-02-2018 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vicky. (Post 9842688)
There was no eyeroll at Waynes letter from his partner (or husband? Not sure which) though. I think its Shane J she has an issue with tbh. Not him being gay. She rolled her eyes at Ashley when Ashley kept going on and on about something too. Seems she just eyerolls as a natural reaction to someone rambling (I don't think Shane was rambling as it was a nice moment, but I know you know what I mean :p )

Yeah I know what you mean, it would just have to be a big coincidence imo that it happened at the exact moment he mentioned being gay. Maybe it is a mixture of things though... it's hard to tell with Ann because like you say she disapproves of so many things so it's hard to pinpoint in any given moment what it is that she actually has a problem with :laugh: I do get the impression her problem with homosexuality goes beyond just the sexual aspects of it though.

bots 01-02-2018 10:45 PM

i would say it's more of an "i'm bored and have heard/seen this before" eye roll. I can imagine her doing it in parliament until it became second nature

Maru 01-02-2018 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by poppsywoppsy (Post 9842630)
I think you do Ann a miservice.

Who said she has to be how others think she should.She has shown she is very much her own person. She has cuddled a lot in the BB house.

In her previous career, I doubt she ever cuddled anyone because it just wasn't done.
This is a new phenomena, mainly with a younger generation, not hers.

She has been totally removed from her comfort zone, made to co habit with people below her intellect and raring for a fight. She has handled them all. She hasn't sworn, lost her temper or acted in a way she didn't want.

I honestly think she had the patience of a saint. If some of these housemates were out of their comfort zone, say in a care home environment with elderly people, they most probably would wak because they didn't have the stoicism that Ann has showed.

Agreed, she doesn't have to be how others are. My point is there are possibly other reasons for her behavior than the simple labels that we would conveniently attribute to only portions of her behavior. There are easy labels for anyone to apply and I don't think that it applies to all of her behavior...(edit)

She is her own person, and it doesn't fit within the paradigms of what are now considered social "norms" (which is all fictional in my mind). I do know some people who hate to hear about sexuality, and yes, that includes gender identity and sexual preferences. It's not the basis of which they view all of life, but for some it is the basis for which to determine how we are treated and should be treated as people...

poppsywoppsy 01-02-2018 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maru (Post 9842750)
Agreed, she doesn't have to be how others are. My point is there are possibly other reasons for her behavior than the simple labels that we would conveniently attribute to only portions of her behavior. There are easy labels for anyone to apply and I think that it applies to all of her behavior...

She is her own person, and it doesn't fit within the paradigms of what are now considered social "norms" (which is all fictional in my mind). I do know some people who hate to hear about sexuality, and yes, that includes gender identity and sexual preferences. It's not the basis of which they view all of life, but for some it is the basis for which to determine how we are treated and should be treated as people...

You do not have to apply any labels at all.

Accept her as she is, an elderly lady who has lots of guts and has lived her life her way.

Why analyse her, she is a product of her age.

Ask yourself why you feel you must delve into her background for answers, why not take her at face value.

I don't think she rolls her eyes at intimacy, she rolls her eyes at gratuitous exhibitionisms.

letmein 01-02-2018 10:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by poppsywoppsy (Post 9842765)
You do not have to apply any labels at all.

Accept her as she is, an elderly lady who has lots of guts and has lived her life her way.

Why analyse her, she is a product of her age.

Ask yourself why you feel you must delve into her background for answers, why not take her at face value.

I don't think she rolls her eyes at intimacy, she rolls her eyes at gratuitous exhibitionisms.

I've lost count of the number of ridiculous excuses you've made for this retched cow. Come back with you think up something new.

rusticgal 01-02-2018 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maru (Post 9842536)
For me it shouldn't be the least bit surprising that people who are very orthodox would not want to keep hearing about other people's sex life(s)? I think that may be part of the Ann's dysfunction that people need to rub this in your face ever so constantly... she is at the very least a prude.

I had a family member that was staunchly anti-sex ("Men only want sex!", etc) after poor experiences with those topics growing up. They were alone and vastly unaware of the joys of the human touch and that humans can have good outcomes romantically.

I think anyone who is repressed, they're not going to be a fan of the subject and anything that rebukes their sterile/innocent-minded perception of how human beings should behave will rub them the wrong way.

I don't think Ann's problem is just with homosexuality, but with human contact and the concept of a healthy happy romantic relationship in general. She can't see past people's more selfish/baser motivators... she likely thinks it will always lead to sin in one form or other, and that things like even dancing can lead someone astray in a major way. Some Baptists are like this and that simple things like trying to get them to open up about their feelings or to dance, even sing would make them feel far too vulnerable... being in those situations are quite uncomfortable for them I think.


Yes it's sad in a way...but there are many Ann's out there who feel uncomfortable with people showing intimate affection. It doesn't make her a bad person..it's just the way she is.

rusticgal 01-02-2018 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamie89 (Post 9842590)
I agree with what you're saying but the problem with Ann I think is that it's not just a problem with hearing about sex lives when it comes to homosexuality. I don't think she likes hearing about homosexuality full stop whether it's sex being discussed or not. Like when she rolled her eyes at Shane mentioning his sexuality... he wasn't actually mentioning anything to do with sex or relationships, just general experiences in life relating to his sexuality, but sexuality isn't just about sex. I think her problem with homosexuality probably extends beyond just her prudish nature in general.


It's not just about homosexuality...she didn't like Shane L's 'farting' story. If Jess had told her about her sex on EOTB she would have condemned that too but I don't know that Jess has told her about that?...but Jess is aware that she would have thought less of her for it...and that's understandable.

Garfie 01-02-2018 11:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by poppsywoppsy (Post 9842630)
I think you do Ann a miservice.

Who said she has to be how others think she should. She has shown she is very much her own person. She has cuddled a lot in the BB house.

In her previous career, I doubt she ever cuddled anyone because it just wasn't done.
This is a new phenomena, mainly with a younger generation, not hers.

She has been totally removed from her comfort zone, made to co habit with people below her intellect and raring for a fight. She has handled them all. She hasn't sworn, lost her temper or acted in a way she didn't want.

I honestly think she had the patience of a saint. If some of these housemates were out of their comfort zone, say in a care home environment with elderly people, they most probably would wak because they didn't have the stoicism that Ann has showed.

I agree with a lot of what you say here. Ann has been totally out of her comfort zone and has coped really well with that. I think for someone who tends to live her life alone, it must have been especially hard sharing a house with others, but I think she has even enjoyed the companionship, which is nice to see.

Although I find her intolerance and eye rolling frustrating, I do think it has been lovely to see the way she has learned to accept and return affection from others.

Jamie89 01-02-2018 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rusticgal (Post 9842838)
It's not just about homosexuality...she didn't like Shane L's 'farting' story. If Jess had told her about her sex on EOTB she would have condemned that too but I don't know that Jess has told her about that?...but Jess is aware that she would have thought less of her for it...and that's understandable.

That's kind of what I'm trying to say though, that she doesn't just have a problem with homosexuality, but her problem with homosexuality still exists. She has problems with lots of other things too like those you've mentioned, and people recognise she has a problem with those things, but often when it comes to recognising her problem with homosexuality it gets disregarded as being a part of her problem with general sex talk, my point is just that I think her problem with homosexuality is seperate from that and she's shown that she possibly has an issue with it even when the conversation isn't about sex, I think part of the problem in recognising this is that people often reduce the topic of homosexuality down to a sexual act when discussing it even when it's not really relevant to do so.

Edit to add: Lots of gay people have experiences in life that are specific to being gay and that don't have anything to do with sex, and it's some of those things that Shane was talking about when she showed disapproval.

rusticgal 02-02-2018 12:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamie89 (Post 9842864)
That's kind of what I'm trying to say though, that she doesn't just have a problem with homosexuality, but her problem with homosexuality still exists. She has problems with lots of other things too like those you've mentioned, and people recognise she has a problem with those things, but often when it comes to recognising her problem with homosexuality it gets disregarded as being a part of her problem with general sex talk, my point is just that I think her problem with homosexuality is seperate from that and she's shown that she possibly has an issue with it even when the conversation isn't about sex, I think part of the problem in recognising this is that people often reduce the topic of homosexuality down to a sexual act when discussing it even when it's not really relevant to do so.

I see and understand what you are saying. I work with many homosexuals in my work and I love them to bits. However with some I find their sexual banter too much...every conversation with sexual innuendos..but others are just camp and funny and very witty without turning every conversation into a sexual one.
Ann equally doesn't like smutty talk and sexual closeness with heterosexuals...she is consistent though. However, she needs to be more accepting of human contact and affection from both.
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Twosugars 02-02-2018 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garfie (Post 9842853)
I agree with a lot of what you say here. Ann has been totally out of her comfort zone and has coped really well with that. I think for someone who tends to live her life alone, it must have been especially hard sharing a house with others, but I think she has even enjoyed the companionship, which is nice to see.

Although I find her intolerance and eye rolling frustrating, I do think it has been lovely to see the way she has learned to accept and return affection from others.

Well said, Garfie. :kiss:
I think Ann has benefited from this programme, the exposure to different characters etc. For example, I love her taking positive interest in Courtney's costumes :blush: Very sweet of her thinking of Shane's comfort wearing his costumes.
And as you say, the hugging. She seems to overcome her objection to human contact.
A lot of Ann's attitudes could be due to her lonely life and limited exposure to other lifestyles. With patience and intellectually rigorous debate I'd imagine she might be able to rethink some of her views. Some, not all of course. Her interpretation of religious teaching is probably not up for a debate, lol.
Shane J is very patient and intelligent and he would be up to that task, but I doubt those two will have much time together after the show to talk.

rusticgal 02-02-2018 12:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garfie (Post 9842853)
I agree with a lot of what you say here. Ann has been totally out of her comfort zone and has coped really well with that. I think for someone who tends to live her life alone, it must have been especially hard sharing a house with others, but I think she has even enjoyed the companionship, which is nice to see.

Although I find her intolerance and eye rolling frustrating, I do think it has been lovely to see the way she has learned to accept and return affection from others.

Good post Garfie.

Maru 02-02-2018 02:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rusticgal (Post 9842835)
Yes it's sad in a way...but there are many Ann's out there who feel uncomfortable with people showing intimate affection. It doesn't make her a bad person..it's just the way she is.

Quote:

Originally Posted by rusticgal (Post 9842838)
It's not just about homosexuality...she didn't like Shane L's 'farting' story. If Jess had told her about her sex on EOTB she would have condemned that too but I don't know that Jess has told her about that?...but Jess is aware that she would have thought less of her for it...and that's understandable.

Yeah, I don't know enough about Ann's past to feel comfortable slating her when I know that there are people who feel very uncomfortable with a lot of the things that happen on BB (but then why did she go on a show like BB? That's a reasonable criticism as well). I think her religion is by design homophobic (by the common definition of it), but that's a little less than saying she discriminates against people on the basis of homosexuality for fun/evil purposes...

I do think though that having sexuality tossed in the face of people who don't even like to have those very personal conversations out in the open is a quick way to get a negative reaction. I think that can very easily be over-read. :shrug:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garfie (Post 9842853)
I agree with a lot of what you say here. Ann has been totally out of her comfort zone and has coped really well with that. I think for someone who tends to live her life alone, it must have been especially hard sharing a house with others, but I think she has even enjoyed the companionship, which is nice to see.

Although I find her intolerance and eye rolling frustrating, I do think it has been lovely to see the way she has learned to accept and return affection from others.

This is what I love about Ann and why I support her. I've enjoyed watching her on the show.

And like you, the only real thing that "irks" me about her is the eyerolling. :laugh: But that's because her facial expressions can be quite rude to other people in the room... I don't like that she leaves that open to interpretation as she claims that she cares about her reputation. But you know, I've seen much ruder come out of other people on BB... it's not really that much when you compare her behavior to other people like freaking Bear.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jamie89 (Post 9842864)
That's kind of what I'm trying to say though, that she doesn't just have a problem with homosexuality, but her problem with homosexuality still exists. She has problems with lots of other things too like those you've mentioned, and people recognise she has a problem with those things, but often when it comes to recognising her problem with homosexuality it gets disregarded as being a part of her problem with general sex talk, my point is just that I think her problem with homosexuality is seperate from that and she's shown that she possibly has an issue with it even when the conversation isn't about sex, I think part of the problem in recognising this is that people often reduce the topic of homosexuality down to a sexual act when discussing it even when it's not really relevant to do so.

Edit to add: Lots of gay people have experiences in life that are specific to being gay and that don't have anything to do with sex, and it's some of those things that Shane was talking about when she showed disapproval.

This is true, he has tried to get away from the banter (finally) and talk about non-sexual things. But you can see where maybe someone like her would have trouble taking his views about morality, for example, seriously when he's done the dress drop (very likely staged), has spent a considerable good amount of time talking behind her back, talked cr*p with Andrew and then he wants to talk about what he feels is morally correct?...

She's tried to point out this contradiction (in her view) I think, but she's been more or less dismissed as a miserable old hag/homophobe. (By the way, I'm behind a little in eps, so if something has changed, I've not seen it yet)

Garfie 02-02-2018 02:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Twosugars (Post 9842890)
Well said, Garfie. :kiss:
I think Ann has benefited from this programme, the exposure to different characters etc. For example, I love her taking positive interest in Courtney's costumes :blush: Very sweet of her thinking of Shane's comfort wearing his costumes.
And as you say, the hugging. She seems to overcome her objection to human contact.
A lot of Ann's attitudes could be due to her lonely life and limited exposure to other lifestyles. With patience and intellectually rigorous debate I'd imagine she might be able to rethink some of her views. Some, not all of course. Her interpretation of religious teaching is probably not up for a debate, lol.
Shane J is very patient and intelligent and he would be up to that task, but I doubt those two will have much time together after the show to talk.

Yes, you're right. I too believe she has benefitted from her time in the house and, as you say, her exposure to different characters. She has developed a warmth for others she certainly didn't seem to feel at the start.

Although I doubt a lot of her character and beliefs will ever change at this point in her life, I do think the experience she has had might make her reconsider some of her ways. Her recent discussions with Shane/Courtney about the costumes do perhaps indicate a softening of certain views, and her willingness to refer to Courtney as a separate entity to Shane perhaps shows some acceptance.


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