Ever struggled with your sexuality?
 

Anyone ever get those days where they wonder what life would be like if you were heterosexual? I've always wondered what it would be like to do the whole marriage, wife and kids thing.

this thread is sexualityist

..no, I guess it's just natural to wonder about things..but you’ve always said that it’s the person that you’ll fall in love with and connect to and not whether they’re male/female..you’ve always been quite open to that, which is something I admire...I would try not to struggle with anything or spend too much time wondering Benjamin and just believe that, my lovely...there's no hurry with anything..as you know, it's more important that you find the right person....that's something that's worth being patient for......

I've struggled with being straight in a way - because most people don't think I am, and there's a fad going about at the moment where everyone is 'turning Bisexual' because it's 'trendy'.

And a few people literally tried to make me 'come out as Bi' - and to stick to what I believed about myself, and telling them to ****** off, meant alot to me. So yeah in a way I struggle with being straight because sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to just be Bi or Gay and not have to constantly keep telling people you're straight when they ask.

IMO though, it's only made me more comfortable with my sexuality if anything.

..oh, it this you way of telling us that you've met someone Ben..?....

..I hope it's not Tammi in that thing you keep asking us to vote in because I've been voting her out everytime..I thought maybe she was bullying you or something....you just can't ever be sure with someone who's name ends in ammi....terrible people....

..yeah, sometimes people can make assumptions Patrick and once they do that they can then believe them to be true and try to force them on you as well....so long as you're confident in who you are then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...

..maybe it's harder for people less confident as you though...

No I have not met anyone, lol. Chance would be a fine thing. I've become the complete opposite of what I was. I'm not down, just occasionally that thought crosses my mind and I ponder on it for a while.

But yes people that end in ámmi' can not be trusted. Wicked creatures they are.

I've struggled to get other people participating in my sexuality, if that counts?

..oh and the irony of you bumping your 'help needed' thread as well.....

..Tammi for the win...

:joker:

Pfft, she was evicted last. :idc:

..in all seriousness, I've never questioned or wondered about my sexuality..but then I met my soul mate when I was very young...

I think about this all time time.

Every single member of my family have lived the traditional life. Wife, Husband and Children. I am the first gay member of my family and i feel that is it so bad that I'm going to break the chain in a way. I still want children, I still want a stable relationship (not necessarily a marriage) and I'm 20 now, time is moving on, my mum had her first child at 23, I don't have too long! So part of me thinks that if i was straight i would be settled down by now and thinking of having children of my own - so that's a bit devastating.

I do think however, though, that maybe i will have a wife? I fall in love with the personality not necessarily the gender. I have always said I was homosexual, so sexually a man is more arousing for me, but when it comes to falling in love, its the personality, so if i fall in love with a woman, the sexual part will come along.

I dont know though.
:(

I've definitely sat and wondered how different everything would be. I reckon if I was straight I'd be a lot more outgoing because then there wouldn't be the whole coming out issue and I'd feel more comfortable with people etc etc.

I would probably have wound up getting confirmed under the Catholic Church too. I didn't do it now because I wasn't going to make a lifelong commitment to an organisation that calls me unnatural, but without that argument I'd probably have wound up going through with it. It's a weird thought actually.

It's just so alien for me to imagine a straight version of myself. :laugh:

..do you not think that 23yrs is still very young to have a child though....I don't know how comfortable you are in yourself about who you are but I do think that has to come first...there is so much time to have children and the most important thing is that you'll be the best parent you can be if you feel complete with who you are...

:lovedup:

..I'm straight Niall and still not very outgoing..maybe it's just in your character and you would be the same either way..?..I guess you'll never know so it's best not to 'blame' anything because that could only make you less confident about who you are and shouldn't be..I also think that the Catholic church disapproves of me..I think they're just very negative and disapproving people in general and their opinions aren't very important...

I know I know. But it's more the fact that having to come out holds me back sometimes. Like being in the closet makes certain conversations irl really awkward for me, and I half think it's pushed me into being a bit of a recluse. But who knows, straight Niall might be just as reclusive in a parallel universe somewhere. It's not that I'm blaming anything per se, just pondering over how different I might be. But thank you Ammi, you're so sweet as always. :lovedup:

And yeah I don't hold much value to their opinions either. I don't care what they say, it's just that my whole family is Catholic and I think I might have gotten confirmed if I was straight. I (think) I'd have no massive problem with them.

It's weird to think of all the different things that could change if one aspect of you as a person was different anyway. :laugh:

...oh, I didn't realise you hadn't come out Niall...do you think that family and close friends really know deep inside and that they're waiting for you to say it...?...

..it's amazing how perceptive us parents are but probably woudn't push our children and let them take everything at their own pace....

Well i'm not gay but i've often wondered/worried about my future seen as i'm quite an independent person, I cant see myself getting married to someone :\ and plus I have no idea what I want to do with my life which is worrying because i'll be 20 next year so my time to be young and go through education is running out.. and I often worry that i'm wasting my 'young' life away by doing nothing all day, I don't go to parties and stuff because I don't drink or smoke or anything and although i'm quite a popular person in general, I've never had a proper best friend so I've just gotten used to doing stuff by myself.. which sounds sad :laugh: When I was in year 11 I always thought that by the time I was 18 i'd have my whole life planned out and probably be famous living in LA and that hasn't happened (yet).

and I've just noticed this has nothing to do with this thread but here it is anyway :p

Well it's actually a very weird situation. Nearly all my closest friends know, and a few family members too. Like, my Mum knows and I'm open with her about it etc, but not my Dad. It's all very complicated and stupid. :laugh: But like you said about parents, my Dad probably knows. Hell my whole family probably does and if they didn't then they'd have to be some kinda stupid not to have noticed really.

My whole issue with it all is that I have to go and admit it to everyone, y'know? That's what I have trouble with. I find it difficult to say "I'm gay" to people irl for whatever reason. I mean I wish there was a button I could push that would just make everyone I know that I'm gay without me having to go through the admitting bit. :joker:

"whole life planned out and probably be famous living in LA and that hasn't happened (yet)."


Thats Good as California is Bankrupt



Never give up


Feel The Force

..yeah, I do understand that and that it's not easy for the words to come out..heterosexuals don't have to make any announcements..'hey, I'm straight dad'..they just take someone home to meet their parents or mention that they have been seeing someone..but I can also see that just taking someone home to meet him, when you find someone probably wouldn't go down well either....there is the possibility that your mum has already told him and he already knows, but if that was the case, it would be good if he could open the conversation and not wait for you to have to 'announce' anything.....some men find that difficult though, not just because you're gay but any type of sex/relationship talk....

I'm Bisexual :P Came out to most people before Xmas there - can't tell family or they will disown me, so maybe it's time for Tibbers to know.

I don't really struggle with it anymore, but I kinda agree with Niall - it would be much easier to not have to bother 'coming out' to everyone and having the worry that comes with all that.

But no, I don't struggle :) love a bit of the aul cock

No

Penis>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>vagina

..it's really easy when you're young to think that being 20yrs and not a teenager anymore is 'old'..but it's really not Saph...a good way of deciding what you want to do is to do some work placements if you can...things that you think might be interesting or suit you...I mean you might yet be famous and living in LA at some point but you have to have something to be famous for..and, as you say, you're an independent person, so you could just approach companies/organisations and ask them if you could help in anyway..put together a CV/portfolio...and it's fine not to have a best friend either....not everyone has one, I don't...I just have a few closer friends...

Yeah idk it's all very silly. Maybe in the future having to admit it will be something that will stop happening. I hope so anyway. I doubt my Mum has told him anyhow. She lives in Ireland and they're divorced and my parents generally hate each other. :laugh:

When I'm at Uni i'll probably be more comfortable telling everyone anyway. I don't mind talking about it behind a keyboard, but irl it's a totally different story.

Thank you :) :love:

Still confused cause the way i feel about both genders is ****ed up

Yes. I've always known that I'm gay, I guess. But up until about two years ago I hid it from everyone, including myself. I tried to convince myself otherwise which is why it took so long to come to terms with it. I suppose I didn't want to be gay because if I was I'd have to face up to homophobic people, I wouldn't be able to have a "proper" family and that from my opinion would have been such a difficult life. I knew I found the male body attractive, but I just wanted it to be a phase. I still convinced myself that I found girls attractive when in reality, I didn't. I even convinced myself that I had feelings for a girl, that was the most awkward moment of my life when I told her that I had feelings for her because I actually didn't, but I didn't know that at the time.

I had a close friend. He was male. I spoke to him a lot and made me feel more comfortable about myself. I finally realised that I was gay and there was nothing I could do about it. He gave me the courage that I needed to tell myself but also to tell others. I developed feelings for him, proper feelings, but of course he's straight. We're no longer friends because I found out that he used me and told people the topics of our conversation, so he told everyone I was gay before I did myself. But I didn't know that until a few months ago, I thought I trusted him.

I haven't came out to my family yet, but most people in my school know. I don't know when I'll come to my family, I've thought about it but I just don't know what to say. I'm not sure how long I'll be waiting before I finally have it I me to tell them but I honestly find it difficult to just turn around and say "I'm gay" and honestly, I'm not quite sure why.

Honestly that is so awful that he betrayed you like, absolute twat :/, i hope you do eventually manage to tell your family, and gain acceptance from them all..
And don't worry about not having a proper family and that, what even is a proper family tbh? it's just what society percieves as one.

Yeah, and I didn't even know! I honestly must have been so stupid because I knew he had a big mouth but I was like "no, no, he would never" and he obviously did.

Thank you, I don't think the acceptance will be a problem but it's still there in my mind that maybe I won't be, but that's something I will have to face because not everyone is going to accept me for what I am... Some really stupid anti-gay people out there who believe the Bible is everything.

Oh yeah, I realise that now. I do want to have a family and it doesn't bother me any more that it won't be a "traditional" family because traditions are silly.

Make a sex tape :amazed:

People used to tell me I am a ****** but I tell them, the only things that i paid for are my teeth, my tits, my hair and my nails. All this ass is real.

:love:

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perfection right here baby

I've always thought I was straight(which is weird because all my gay friends say they've always known) I have even had crushes on girls :/. It wasn't until I was in year 7 when I developed this huge crush on a boy I realised I may be gay. Right now I'm openly gay but sometimes I still am sexually attracted to women but I've only had one relationship with a girl because Im a bit too camp for most girls :/

I'm bisexual but I don't like having sex with men. That's the only struggle if you could call it that. Sometimes I feel cruel going to gay bars and scoring men only to have to tell them mid making out "I like you but this is as far as it goes, you know that?". Heck having a cuddle and getting a blowjob with a woman is better than sex, too. Sex isn't overrated - most people love it - but me personally it's not a priority. I fine it quite boring.

The other bollocks is that I do waaaay better with men than I do with women and I kind of would rather if it was the other way around. But I like going out wearing nail paint, black eyeshadow, sometimes there is glitter, I have hair that belongs in a 1986 copy of Smash Hits! etc and whilst that's who I am and what I love and I wouldn't change it to to increase my odds the fact is that it is something gay men will go for and be comfortable with way more than straight women.

To that end most of the women I've got with with are bisexual or at least extremely open to experimentation as well.

no never

Your obviously not doing it right. When me and Stebie get down mmhhmmm
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