Help! Fake tan disater!!!!
 

As many of you know I fell flat on my face and broke my nose... as you do. tomorrow I have a family event so thought why not get a haircut, spruce myself up.

I asked for crew cut she gave me cone head. I then went to boots to buy fake tan as I need to cover up all this brusing on my face. I thought why not go all out and look all exotic.

As I applied the tan, it kept getting darker and darker till finally I looked Somalian.

I tried scrubbing my face but nothing! Then noticed my eyebrows and eyelashes were brown. So right now im sat in front of a handheld mirror applying mascara to my eyebrows. I must say the sales girl at Boots was very unsympathetic.

How do I get this stuff off my face coz I look like ive been rolling around in sh!t.

:laugh2:

I have no advice, sorry. But this is all quite hilarious :D

This :laugh2:

oh Dan.... :joker:

I feel like crying but laughing at the same time.

I do the dumbest sh!t.

My nan has dementia im gonna scare the sh!t out of her.

Just go with it changing race is the new thing. (Lil Kim and Beyoncé's impact).

:laugh2:
I think you can buy fake tan corrector in Boots? If not, I think lemon juice can correct small mistakes but I'm not so sure you should scrub your face with something so acidic.

Maybe a photo would help us advise you? :)

:joker::joker:

Tbh

Yes :D

Well I might aswell just throw acid in my face.

My god im the elephant man :( but brown.

:laugh2:

I'm sure it will fade in time, Daniel. :hug:

Lemon juice is quite good for removing fake tan. I've removed streaks with it. Good luck!

Get some cream dulux

:laugh2:

You cant even make this **** up.....Just went to pick my stuff up from the dry cleaners and a gravy stained t-shirt was hidden in the white linen so not only is my face mahogany but now so are my bed sheets or should I call them bed sh!ts.

Im cursed!!!

Its more like Jodie Marsh body builder colour. Definitely not the summer glow advertised on the bottle.

:joker:

:laugh2:

FINE!

Attachment 2697

So the girls name was Jackie...."Yeah Brackie".

Jackie the thorn in my side.

omg please post a pic of your face

Tenner says Daniel looks like this right now
http://i.imgur.com/o74H3Fk.jpg

OMG I was gonna post about the friends episode with the black light.

"Why do you have a black light its 1999?!?!"

who wouldn't want to look like mooriah who they also call the elusive chanteuse?

Go for it then.

Just visit Boots on Albany Road. Loreal tanning mouse £14.99 but lucky you they have slashed the price by £5.

I look forward to your thread.

:laugh2: hope it fades

:joker:

A conehead Somalian with a broken nose. Oh dear. :laugh:

Dencia can help.

http://uptownmagazine.com/files/2014...itenicious.jpg

Are you sure you took your sheets to the dry cleaners, how posh!

Use a facial scrub or face mask that will tone it down

:joker:

Dry cleaners are posh? :conf:

Still no photos? Tut tut.

Did you get it off?

Lemon juice and baking soda on an exfoliating glove takes it right off.

Zee 2... :joker: I would have thought a facial scrub too.

It looks good today lol.

Just needed a bath. Loving how the mascara frames my eyes aswel I may become one of those gays who wears make up.

I likey.

OMG reading back on this is hilarious lol I was genuinely distraught.

What a tw@t.

For sheets yes, everyone I know bungs their sheets in the washing machine.

To me washing machines are posh.

I don't own one.