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-   -   Where do you stand on non-binary palaver? (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=385526)

Redway 16-05-2023 04:02 PM

Where do you stand on non-binary palaver?
 
Inspired by the recent Bud-Light shenanigan. I thought I'd string it out into an actual thread.

Oliver_W 16-05-2023 04:04 PM

Gender as a whole is a load of nonsense. It's nothing more than a social construct, we are our bodies, nothing more.

Redway 16-05-2023 04:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oliver_W (Post 11292037)
Gender as a whole is a load of nonsense. It's nothing more than a social construct, we are our bodies, nothing more.

Something a lot of people forget is that clothes/accessories (just to use that as example now) that are highly feminised as we know them now were originally intended for men. Make-up, wigs, high-heels and even the colour pink were originally intended for men. As far as contrary doctrine goes you get certain Nigerian churches (Deeper Life being a notorious example, not that the church as a whole is too bad) banning women from wearing trousers despite the fact that hardly anyone wore trousers up-until about 200 years ago (and even then they were only made for a specific purpose, i.e., horse-riding) and even places that have earlier history and experiences with trousers often reserved them for women (India being a prime example). They try and push post-colonial indoctrination that only applied to a very particular time in history in the grand scheme of things as not just "African culture" but the actual word of God and we all know that ain't it. Even the overseeing superintendent himself (pastor Kumuyi) low-key admits that and actually wants to abolish all that crap. I can understand the bit about not wearing jewellery in church and women covering their hair in the house of God but the rest is just copy-cat truckster garbage. And it’s not like the men in the Bible ever wore trousers so y’know.

"Non-binary" per-se is utter nonsense, too.

Crimson Dynamo 16-05-2023 04:20 PM

Its narcissistic bollocks
 
For the narcissist, the world is a mirror. The narcissist must always see ‘his
“grandiose self” reflected in the attentions of others’,. So it is with the
trans movement. It expects every realm of society – every awards ceremony,
every woman’s space, every linguistic tradition – to bow and scrape before its
post-truth, ahistorical belief that people are whatever sex they say they are.

https://www.spiked-online.com/2023/0...-of-nonbinary/

Oliver_W 16-05-2023 04:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292041)
Something a lot of people forget is that clothes/accessories (just to use that as example now) that are highly feminised as we know them now were originally intended for men. Make-up, wigs, high-heels and even the colour pink were originally intended for men. As far as contrary doctrine goes you get certain Nigerian churches (Deeper Life being a notorious example, not that the church as a whole is too bad) banning women from wearing trousers despite the fact that hardly anyone wore trousers up-until about 200 years ago (and even then they were only made for a specific purpose, i.e., horse-riding) and even places that have earlier history and experiences with trousers often reserved them for women (India being a prime example). They try and push post-colonial indoctrination that only applied to a very particular time in history in the grand scheme of things as not just "African culture" but the actual word of God and we all know that ain't it. Even the overseeing superintendent himself (pastor Kumuyi) low-key admits that and actually wants to abolish all that crap. I can understand the bit about not wearing jewellery in church and women covering their hair in the house of God but the rest is just copy-cat truckster garbage.

"Non-binary" per-se is utter nonsense, too.

Clothes mean next to nothing. Some fully grown men wander around in nightshirts, doesn't mean they're going to bed :joker:

Beso 16-05-2023 04:26 PM

You are either a male, female. Gay male, or gay female. That's where I stand.

You cant be a nothing.

Redway 16-05-2023 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oliver_W (Post 11292045)
Clothes mean next to nothing. Some fully grown men wander around in nightshirts, doesn't mean they're going to bed :joker:

It’s a pity the likes of Deeper Life spoil their image just by enabling the cycle of man-made indoctrination (‘don’t wear this; wear a skirt that’s so long it extends to the hell-fire we’re trying to avoid instead; ah, you mustn’t wear that one, o’). As a church itself (putting all the indoctrination aside) it’s perfectly fine, potentially one of the best, but women are really limited when it comes to clothes in churches like that. Guys/men get it too but on nowhere near the same level and it just reeks of oppression that doesn’t need to be there. Pity as the teaching itself is otherwise actually really good but considering there are people who’ll run to the toilet and call the police on a pastor during extended services for “keeping them hostage,” oppressing women in 2023 doesn’t look too good. People wouldn’t even mind staying long as much if they could dress in a way that didn’t make them look like an underpaid house-maid sleeping in long coco-sacs. The police are bound to make an arrest in that church one day but only for crimes against fashion.

I’m just using the church as an example anyway. But I’m sure you catch my drift.

hijaxers 16-05-2023 04:36 PM

Its all nonsense and they can shove their pronouns where the sun don't shine.

Redway 16-05-2023 04:37 PM

I wouldn’t say gender per-se (tangible gender) means nothing whatsoever (not that those innate differences aren’t over-exaggerated) but that’s neither here nor there with regard to what I’m getting at with the crux of this thread. One thing I’d say for that though is that when you start to see someone of the opposite sex (I mean, depending on which way you swing, really) as a fully-fleshed person with an actual personality than a sex object you start to view them on their own terms (which is how everyone is entitled to be on some level) and not just within the rigid box of men and women.

There are some things that only apply to women and certain things that only apply to men (or at least predominantly) just by mere virtue of gender and stuff like that does need to be acknowledged but the way young ‘wannabe-alpha’ lads often talk about women comes from the fact that they’re often not socialised to see young women as actual people. They want to be earning 100k+ a year in fraud-money and have a pretty lady who they can eventually marry, cheat on, tell to shut up whenever they feel like it and expect to do all their laundry and cooking for them. Having a bit (or a lot) of N.S.A. fun is absolutely fine but when I’ve had to listen to other guys banging on about their increasing body count when they’ve already got a main woman/young woman on the go and had to pretend to be interested doesn’t bear thinking about. But to them “girlfriend” might mean “main side-ting on da go until I’m actually ready to get married” so in one sense I can’t even judge them too much. But what I do know fo-sho is that slag-shaming while actually being an out-and-out stud-cheat with actual strings attached (not just a high B.C. that’s accumulated over time) is not the one. I know it’s always been there but guys under the age of 30 often talk about it like it’s totally normal for the guy to cheat. Not even an ounce of shame or embarrassment. They don’t value the true meaning of relationships anymore.

Beso 16-05-2023 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292059)
I wouldn’t say gender per-se (tangible gender) means nothing whatsoever (not that those innate differences aren’t over-exaggerated) but that’s neither here nor there with regard to what I’m getting at with the crux of this thread. One thing I’d say for that though is that when you start to see someone of the opposite sex (I mean, depending on which way you swing, really) as a fully-fleshed person with an actual personality than a sex object you start to view them on their own terms (which is how everyone is entitled to be on some level) and not just within the rigid box of men and women. There are some things that only apply to women and certain things that only apply to men (or at least predominantly) just by mere virtue of gender and stuff like that does need to be acknowledged but the way young ‘wannabe-alpha’ lads often talk about women comes from the fact that they’re often not socialised to see young women as actual people. They want to be earning 100k+ a year in fraud-money and have a pretty lady who they can eventually marry, cheat on, tell to shut up whenever they feel like it and expect to do all their laundry and cooking for them. Having a bit (or a lot) of N.S.A. fun is absolutely fine but when I’ve had to listen to other guys banging on about their increasing body count when they’ve already got a main woman/young woman on the go and had to pretend to be interested doesn’t bear thinking about. But to them “girlfriend” might mean “side-ting until I’m actually ready to get married” so in one sense I can’t even judge them too much.



I can see them as someone who believes they wish to be neither, not someone who is neither. That's what I would say to them.

user104658 16-05-2023 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oliver_W (Post 11292037)
Gender as a whole is a load of nonsense. It's nothing more than a social construct, we are our bodies, nothing more.

That's a little reductive; for example language itself is "nothing more than a social construct" ... or all sorts of concepts; friendship, family, love, any and all forms of entertainment, art, philosophy. I think it's quite unambiguous that social constructs, while yes indeed "constructs", are nonetheless very real.

My stance on the gender binary is actually quite different to (and yet related to) my stance on the ability or even the need to change sex ... I think the two are entirely different and have become confusingly intertwined in ways that were never necessary. And in ways that (from an LGBTQ perspective) actually completely clash. Transgenderism (physical/hormonal transition) for example as a concept is completely incompatible with a belief in the gender spectrum (non-binary nature of gender).

Short answer: I believe that gender is 100% non binary, I believe that sex is 100% binary and how an individuals gender manifests has NOTHING to do with their sex, pronouns, or whether they're a man or a woman.

Interestingly I think this seems to have been BETTER understood, or was at least starting to be better understood, back in the 70's and 80's. For example David Bowie (and others), did not conform to the gender binary at all in a huge number of ways and yet they were very clear on still being men/males, and that their external presentation and personality traits had nothing to do with whether or not they were "still men". That's exactly how it should be. Should men (and women) be able to dress and present however they want, wear make-up, engage in non-gender-stereotyped activities whenever they want? Absolutely. And they should be able to do so whilst still being their natal sex.

IMO we've gone absolutely arse-backwards into a belief that if one does not conform to gendered stereotypes (of appearance, personality, activity and presentation) then that means they can't be that thing and must be "other". And that if they want to fully self-realise they need to literally physically alter themselves, and be "grouped" with whichever sex happens to match their stereotyped personality traits most closely. It's just nonsense. Gender presentation should be whatever people want it to be without judgement, things that need to be segregated by sex should continue to be segregated by sex.

Like I said I think society understood that better at one point or was getting there. A man can hate football and "other manly stuff" and like "frilly girly stuff" and still be a man ffs. I actually find a lot of the current gender zeitgeist really troublingly judgemental, oddly enough. "Males if you don't like BLOKE STUFF you are actually a girl! Get it sorted out silly!" - "Females, if you like BUTCH MAN STUFF you are actually a boy why do you have boobs and where is your beard??"

Beso 16-05-2023 04:48 PM

You can call a turnip a Swede all you want, it will still be a turnip.

user104658 16-05-2023 04:49 PM

Also - EVERYONE is gender non-binary. Any person who was not non-binary (100% masculine or 100% feminine) would be a cartoon caricature, not a real human being.

Again the idea that this means there's a gender tipping point that suddenly alters one's sex, or that pronouns mean ... really anything at all ... is verging on impossible to fathom out.

Crimson Dynamo 16-05-2023 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by parmnion (Post 11292068)
You can call a turnip a Swede all you want, it will still be a turnip.

:fist: Stop denying Swedes exist you TERF

Redway 16-05-2023 05:05 PM

I remember filling out an application (a serious one) the other day and gender-wise there were options treble Methusala’s age in number between female and male.

Nah, nah, nah. This has gone too far.

user104658 16-05-2023 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292081)
I remember filling out an application (a serious one) the other day and gender-wise there were options treble Methusala’s age in number between female and male.

Nah, nah, nah. This has gone too far.

On forms it really is just about over-the-top inclusion no matter how you look at it - there's no need for anything but, at most, "male/female/other". With a box to fill in for "other" if so inclined.

Redway 16-05-2023 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy (Post 11292065)
That's a little reductive; for example language itself is "nothing more than a social construct" ... or all sorts of concepts; friendship, family, love, any and all forms of entertainment, art, philosophy. I think it's quite unambiguous that social constructs, while yes indeed "constructs", are nonetheless very real.

My stance on the gender binary is actually quite different to (and yet related to) my stance on the ability or even the need to change sex ... I think the two are entirely different and have become confusingly intertwined in ways that were never necessary. And in ways that (from an LGBTQ perspective) actually completely clash. Transgenderism (physical/hormonal transition) for example as a concept is completely incompatible with a belief in the gender spectrum (non-binary nature of gender).

Short answer: I believe that gender is 100% non binary, I believe that sex is 100% binary and how an individuals gender manifests has NOTHING to do with their sex, pronouns, or whether they're a man or a woman.

Interestingly I think this seems to have been BETTER understood, or was at least starting to be better understood, back in the 70's and 80's. For example David Bowie (and others), did not conform to the gender binary at all in a huge number of ways and yet they were very clear on still being men/males, and that their external presentation and personality traits had nothing to do with whether or not they were "still men". That's exactly how it should be. Should men (and women) be able to dress and present however they want, wear make-up, engage in non-gender-stereotyped activities whenever they want? Absolutely. And they should be able to do so whilst still being their natal sex.

IMO we've gone absolutely arse-backwards into a belief that if one does not conform to gendered stereotypes (of appearance, personality, activity and presentation) then that means they can't be that thing and must be "other". And that if they want to fully self-realise they need to literally physically alter themselves, and be "grouped" with whichever sex happens to match their stereotyped personality traits most closely. It's just nonsense. Gender presentation should be whatever people want it to be without judgement, things that need to be segregated by sex should continue to be segregated by sex.

Like I said I think society understood that better at one point or was getting there. A man can hate football and "other manly stuff" and like "frilly girly stuff" and still be a man ffs. I actually find a lot of the current gender zeitgeist really troublingly judgemental, oddly enough. "Males if you don't like BLOKE STUFF you are actually a girl! Get it sorted out silly!" - "Females, if you like BUTCH MAN STUFF you are actually a boy why do you have boobs and where is your beard??"

I think the difference between being trans. and being autonomously gender-binary (whatever the heck that actually is) is that being transgender and going through with surgery is a choice, not a default birth-position. And ultimately the transitioning is based on the two actual sex categories that truly exist (male and female). The very definition of being non-binary is that it’s outside the box of male and female altogether.

Redway 16-05-2023 05:14 PM

A 3-year-old can so badly want to be an 85-year-old wrinkly (somehow) and even identify as one but a toddler will always be a toddler.

Alf 16-05-2023 07:40 PM

When i was growing up, these things didn't even exist. We were too busy having fun.

I think you're all totally brainwashed and bonkers.

Redway 16-05-2023 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alf (Post 11292116)
When i was growing up, these things didn't even exist. We were too busy having fun.

I think you're all totally brainwashed and bonkers.

What things didn’t exist and who’s bonkers?

Redway 16-05-2023 07:53 PM

Maybe it was hasty of me to assume you’d actually read the whole thread, Alf. Most people here are firmly anti non-binary.

Alf 16-05-2023 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292121)
What things didn’t exist and who’s bonkers?

Binary, that was just some word for posh people for when two things were binded together.

Most people besides me.

Alf 16-05-2023 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292124)
Maybe it was hasty of me to assume you’d actually read the whole thread, Alf. Most people here are firmly anti non-binary.

Your title to the thread asked a question. I answered that question.

If you want me to read all the drivel, then don't ask the question in the title. Ask it in the drivel.

Redway 16-05-2023 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alf (Post 11292128)
Your title to the thread asked a question. I answered that question.

If you want me to read all the drivel, then don't ask the question in the title. Ask it in the drivel.

There’s little point taking your cue from the title alone to call everyone bonkers and brainwashed because most people here aren’t arguing for the non-binary status at all. You’re free to comment however, wherever but without deeping the context at least a little bit you’re not going to add much to the discussion. You should’ve stopped at “we were too busy having fun.” “You’re all bonkers” makes no sense when hardly anyone here actually disagrees with you. Oliver_W (who even thinks trans. peeps are mentally ill) and LeatherTrumpet are the last people in the world to be non-binary allies and you know it.

Mystic Mock 17-05-2023 12:48 AM

Being honest I don't fully understand Non-Binary, especially the ones that go with the pronouns he/them or she/them as you're telling me that you think you're binary and non-binary, that makes no sense to me.

However I don't hate Non-Binary people as they're not harming anyone with this stuff, but it's just something I need to try to understand better I think.

After all when I was growing up our generation was probably the last generation that didn't know what a gender Non-Binary person was, so it's probably a generational thing for a lot of us.

Redway 17-05-2023 10:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mystic Mock (Post 11292156)
Being honest I don't fully understand Non-Binary, especially the ones that go with the pronouns he/them or she/them as you're telling me that you think you're binary and non-binary, that makes no sense to me.

However I don't hate Non-Binary people as they're not harming anyone with this stuff, but it's just something I need to try to understand better I think.

After all when I was growing up our generation was probably the last generation that didn't know what a gender Non-Binary person was, so it's probably a generational thing for a lot of us.

I don’t think that there’s anything real to understand, Mock.

user104658 18-05-2023 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway (Post 11292491)
I don’t think that there’s anything real to understand, Mock.

One of the main issues with trying to understand it is that there's no consensus even amongst people who consider themselves to be non-binary. So you could listen in depth to several people and feel like you'd developed a good understanding, only for someone else to tell you that it's all wrong and you don't understand it at all.

The crux of the whole thing is hyperindividualism so there's no over-arching concept to understand ... it's just people's vague thoughts about themselves as individuals, and ham-fisted attempts to group, categorise and label individual personality traits.

What I find amusing is that the circle seems to close but in a really confused way. "I am in fact so different and unique that NONE of the pronouns fit and I need my own 100% unique pronouns!" ... yes that already exists... it's called a proper noun ... i.e. your name...

GoldHeart 18-05-2023 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mystic Mock (Post 11292156)
Being honest I don't fully understand Non-Binary, especially the ones that go with the pronouns he/them or she/them as you're telling me that you think you're binary and non-binary, that makes no sense to me.

However I don't hate Non-Binary people as they're not harming anyone with this stuff, but it's just something I need to try to understand better I think.

After all when I was growing up our generation was probably the last generation that didn't know what a gender Non-Binary person was, so it's probably a generational thing for a lot of us.


When it comes to the " not harming" thing , social media has become a huge influence with this whole ' non binary' nonsense now. As you said ...it doesn't make sense ,and I honestly think majority of people who go by " they/ them" pronouns just want attention or they're confused,plus they enjoy making people just as puzzled as them... And they seem to get argumentative when anyone ' misgenders' them ,and they expect us all to be mind readers. It really is a clown world now .

Yes people can identify how they please, but if ' non binany ' means NIETHER gender or INBETWEEN, then why are they putting themselves under the ' trans' umbrella ...and also using like you said they/ them / her / him aswell :conf: :facepalm: ,it literally makes no sense.

I honestly think alot of the people now identifying under the LGBTQ+ category..... likely would have been goth or emo back in my childhood & teen years at school & college,as that was the 'trend' back then . But now the new trend is LGBTQ+ related stuff.

user104658 18-05-2023 10:59 AM

Honestly on all sorts of issues when I boil them right back I keep coming up with "... the internet" as a major cause of a lot of things. I don't think it was meant to happen. In so many ways a great thing, the whole world interconnected, but I don't think the unfathomable scale of millions (billions) of people in easy/instant contact with one another is quite compatible with human psychology. It's resulting in some really bizarre sociology :joker:.

Zizu 12-05-2024 08:45 AM

Not sure if this is the correct place for this so please move it to a more appropriate thread if necessary


https://x.com/TTExulansic/status/1789508307839017361


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

Redway 12-05-2024 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy (Post 11292576)
One of the main issues with trying to understand it is that there's no consensus even amongst people who consider themselves to be non-binary. So you could listen in depth to several people and feel like you'd developed a good understanding, only for someone else to tell you that it's all wrong and you don't understand it at all.

The crux of the whole thing is hyperindividualism so there's no over-arching concept to understand ... it's just people's vague thoughts about themselves as individuals, and ham-fisted attempts to group, categorise and label individual personality traits.

What I find amusing is that the circle seems to close but in a really confused way. "I am in fact so different and unique that NONE of the pronouns fit and I need my own 100% unique pronouns!" ... yes that already exists... it's called a proper noun ... i.e. your name...

Yep. I absolutely agree. Human diversity in personality is so incredibly varied and complex and rightly-so but biologically you’re either male or female (hermaphroditism aside). “I’m female but don’t like pink so must be gender-fluid” is like … nah. Pink wasn’t even a stereotypically feminine colour until comparatively recently. You don’t need to use gender to express your individuality. You say you feel like gender boxes construct you, so why are you going back to said concept just to be your own person and expand on your individuality within your own limits?

Biologically. Non-binary just does not exist. It’s more man-made than societal constructs arising from gender. And it’s so 2018. It was cringe. then.


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