Feeling Down/ Anxious and unhappy in life
 

Hi guys, To be honest I think this time of year can be so difficult for a lot of people, and admittedly I'm finding it very difficult, I'm unhappy with my situation in life at the moment and there seems to be this image of christmas where we all have to be happy and are having such a good time and doing well in our lives and it's just so far from reality, Also just reaching out to anyone on here who is feeling the same. I'm obviously not a qualified mental health professional but sometimes a listening ear can be so important as well

Feeling Down/ Anxious and unhappy in life
 

How odd .. I am battling with moodswings and anxiety as we lead up to Christmas holiday period - so much to plan and do


I have actually just had a mini meltdown in a huge Tesco … just got overheated and overwhelmed ..

Me and the Mrs had ‘words’ over something or nothing- Christmas related

We had split up to supposedly ‘save time’ but it all resulted in me finding a quiet corner on their cafe area ..listening to TalkSport - as we speak .

Soon be home where its nice and safe then its footie at 4.30pm

Besides the usual, don’t forget Samaritans (116 123) is there for you, free, 24/7.

I'm on board with all of these posts, very good!

Kev and Zizu, don't hesitate to pm me for a friendly chat if you'd like to do so.

Red, you're a sweetheart. The Samaritans is a charity very close to my heart. Not ashamed to say I've used them in the past. Thanks.

aw Kev, its not the easiest time of year for some, and the dark nights can contribute to a sense of isolation, try and focus on the positives, and at the very minimum get the basics in, good sleep, exercise and nutrition, do you have good relationships with your parents /siblings, have you a good friend you can go out with? basically Christmas is just one day and by this time next week we willl be looking forward to 2025, think of one change you would like to make in the New Year dont overwhelm yourself just one positive step that you can carry forward into 2025

you are lucky to be still alive Zizu, so she is doing all the shopping while you listen to the radio.... :laugh: this is why I go lone wolf for food shopping I know what I want and where it is located, Mr C would be half a mile behind with the trolley 'looking' at stuff and I would have steam coming out my ears :joker:

:joker: hilarious Cherie

Hi Cherie, Thank you for your kind words and great advice as well, Appreciated, I do have a very good relationship with my parents and they are very understanding which Is a big plus, In terms of social life and friendships I live in rural ireland on a farm where getting to the nearest shop is even a 20 minute drive and have no friends as such which is obviously a big problem and very bad for my mental health, I would love to be in a relationship as well but hopefully Thing's will start to happen in 2025, All about taking action

…absolutely, so many people can struggle at this time of year and it’s so easy to feel that we’re alone in that struggle when there are so many feeling exactly the same …I know that you’ve mentioned about trying to travel next year and it’s good I think, to set small very achievable goals because achieving them can then build so much emotional strength to stretch those goals further, you know…?…I was thinking, though…do you have a local homeless centre who will be serving Christmas lunch…?…I wonder how you would feel about volunteering there, I see there’s one in Cork for instance, called Cork Penny Dinners and that also serves meals to the homeless on Christmas Day…I don’t know if that’s something that you feel would be something to consider …

…oh, that probably wouldn’t be a possibility for you actually, Kev…if you live very remotely and would have a reasonable travel to get to a town…

Hi Ammi, Thank you for that, yes on Christmas day it would be quite difficult with lack of transport, however I will have a look at volunteering opportunities in Cork for January

…I think that’s a good plan/goal…because it really will help your own confidence to build in feeling that difference that you’re making to others, you know…?..and try to think of Christmas Day as just a day with some …(hopefully…)…great TV…

Absolutely Ammi, It's important to get out there and take small steps in which doors can open up for us at some stage as well

…making some goals, just one goal at a time and starting with baby steps with things that you know are achievable is a great build back/build up to confidence because there’s such a feel good with the sense of achievement, isn’t there…the more that you can tick off that list then the more it will motivate you in your next step…so many things can pass us by in positive things we’ve done and can do as well and even excel at…?..because they’re things that we just take for granted with ourselves …so that’s why lists and ticking off is a good plan as well…

Nailed it

I have visions of Mrs Z reaching the tills and texting Zizu, Im ready and at till no 6 meet you there with your half of the shopping


Zizu.....MY HALF, im in the cafe keeping Talksport company

If you dont drive Kev, maybe that could be a goal? that would open up a whole lot of options

I find driving very difficult with my Dyspraxia Cherie however I do have free travel here on buses and trains which is really good, Must admit I hate driving to be honest

…yeah, I think that if you hate driving then it’s not a goal that you’re going to find very achievable…that’s not to say that it wouldn’t be something for the future but something that will fill you with enthusiasm/as oppose to dread and something that won’t make you anxious is the type of baby steps to begin with, possibly…and that can be your first goal, to think of some of those goals and the one that you’re going to try to take steps to achieve first…?…

…I’m not a driver, I have to say in that it’s not something that I enjoy doing…I love train journeys, though…so a travel pass would be a great thing…

I'm not a driver either, I'd be utterly utterly hopeless being honest. I like train travel as well, really enjoy it.

oh okay, free travel good.... maybe the first step then is identify a club you would like to join in the nearest town and push yourself to join up in Jan, just once a week, nothing that is going to take you out of your comfort zone too much, is there a gym, or a football club, or Art or Adult learning or whatever....I come from a little town in Cork and the range of activities they have on offer during the week would put alot of cities to shame :laugh:

Christmas is a tough time for many experiencing the same feelings as yourself..you are not alone believe me.
I just hope you can see yourself through the next few days and like Cherie said everyone will be looking towards the New Year. Stay positive and set yourself some realistic goals for the New Year…you can do this. Have you sought help through your GP?

…just to say also, Kev…from my time here on the forum…?…I’ve found TiBB to be a open 365 days a year and there may not be anyone online all through Christmas Day but off and on there will be people popping on so it’s always here for you to say hey, if you feel that you want to…Christmas Day evening will be a lot more active I think and Arista will be keeping up with the latest news stories etc…

:thumbs: I'll second that, I'll be around on and off as usual really, and that goes for anyone who'd care to chat.

Thank you so much, Yes I have made an appointment with my GP for tomorrow afternoon

Thank you all so much, the support on here from everyone has been amazing

That’s excellent…my son has been through it this year. He moved away and found a GP who has been brilliant. He was very anti anti depressants but these have helped him immensely along with something to help him sleep. His anxiety struck at night time and as a consequence lack of sleep… He has had dips but then after a few days got back on track…if we can find out how to circumnavigate those dips then hopefully his life will improve dramatically.

I hope you have a good Doctor…so I will be thinking of you x

…:love:…

what has your avatar pic moved from portrait to landscape?

I do feel very lucky to have an amazing life. Hope y’all okay this christmas. Kisses

Christmas is a tough time for many. I have had loss every holiday season of recent. I have family struggling with homelessness. I do still look forward to the season but I find I have to take care of the bulk of the tasks involved in order to fully enjoy it. I do enjoy end of year prayers the most and taking the time to myself to identify things in myself to work on, but yeah... New Years is usually the peak for me.

Edit: Oop, messed up... I have to talk care of the bulk of tasks.. forgot to put "in advance".. timing is always hard at the end of the year for me... :spin:

YES.

I also go much earlier in the day when the crowd is better. I can be in and out if I really need to be.

I was looking forward to Christmas this year mainly because last years was depressing as we lost our dog in November last year, so was hoping this one would be more positive.

However I found out about a month ago that my job is being made redundant at the beginning of the year. The firm I work for is going through a big restructure and they’ve lost a lot of money in the last 2 years so by the end of January I could be out of a job.

My boss mentioned that there will be a job within the firm that I can apply for (which I obviously will) and he’s really hoping that I get it but there isn’t any guarantee that I will. I’m just trying to stay as positive as I can for the most part but it’s very hard. It’s been on my mind every night since I found out.

so sorry DeD hate it when firms do this just before Christmas, there is never a good time, but this time of year is particularly harsh, the good news is that your boss is pushing you to apply for another job within the firm so that sounds very positive, I know its easy to say but it really does sound like they want to keep you x

:love:

Pretty damn close tbf

Yh it’s really **** timing tbh. I’m not gonna lie tho I did see it coming for a long while. The way that the firm has been run for the last couple years has been dreadful and I’ve sat back and seen how so much money has just been wasted on absolute nonsense. I’m not in a position in the company that can decide these things, if I were to suggest something that would need changing they wouldn’t listen because the people above know best (which they clearly didn’t) and I knew what the end result would eventually be.

I’m kinda unsure whether I actually want to stay or not. On one hand I do because I like a majority of the people I work with and my boss really wants me to stay but on the other hand, if the firm doesn’t turn things around within the next year we will all be out of a job and that’s something that only time will tell.

How does that concern you in the slightest?

Tbh this is a fairly common issue for people all over the country.

You're certainly not alone.

I'm not an expert in how to help you personally (because I'm also not a mental health expert) but I hope that there is at least someone on here that will be able to give you sound advice.