Jokes
 

Time for some bad jokes :thumbs:


Ok, what do you call Batman and Robin after they get run over by a steam-roller?




Flatman and Ribbon!!!!!



Ok I know it's bad, anyone got any more????????

:thumbs:

yes but they got elected :hugesmile:

I have a football related joke - I have to blank out the swear word though. (If it's not ok, tell me and I'll delete it!)

Alex Ferguson is at a Miss World contest, when Miss Chile runs over to him. She turns to him and says, "Alex, I admire you so much, the way you have built up your football team and are champions nearly every year, could you sign my left breast?"
Alex looked a little dumbfounded, but signed, and started to walk off.

Miss France ran over to him, and gushed her praises, "You are a master tactician, and I really admire you, would you sign my right breast?"
Alex again, looked a little puzzled and signed.

Finally, as he was getting a drink, Miss Argentina ran over to him. "Mr Ferguson, you are my idol, could you sign here please?" she asked, pulling aside her pants.

"You're joking aren't you?" said Alex laughing. "Last time I signed an Argentinian t$@t, it cost me 25 million!"

Boom boom.

All the bad jokes I have you'll have heard...........

Hey Glitter_babe

Did Alex say

''That's the way uh huh uh huh

I like it Uh huh uh huh ''


??????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:hugesmile: :hugesmile: :hugesmile:

Complete this Joke



Why did the chicken cross the road ?



[remeber the BB3 chickens ?] Now it's over to you.............. :joker:

ok this is really!!! Rubbish but here we go!
Two Peanuts were in a pub and one was assualted
do dum dum cha!
lol

I like that one BBCeleb, the worst ones are always the funniest :thumbs:


Why did the hedgehog cross the road?




To see his flat mate!!!!!!



Sorry!

lol

that is very naff Janette but so naff its kinda funny

why did the chicken cross the web?to get to the other site.
enough of the chicken jokes lol.
what do you get if you cross a pit bull whith a hooker?your last BJ
ps:apoligy in advance :blush:

Quality

I thought it was to see his squash partner :bouncy:

Bloke is devoted to his parrot.

Parrot sadly falls off his perch one morning and lies panting helplessly on the floor of the cage.

Bloke finds him, picks him up and tenderly wraps him in a blanket and rushes him to the vet.

The vet has a look, tries to revive the parrot, but it is too late. The vet tells him the parrot is beyond help.

Bloke gets terribly upset and begs him to try something, ANYTHING!

Vet agrees, leaves the room and comes back in with a Golden Retriever.

The dog puts his fron paws on the table, sniffs the parrot carefully, looks up to the vet, whines sadly, gets down and the vet takes him out of the room.

The door opens again, the vet comes in with a tabby cat. Puts the cat on the table, and the cat walks round the parrot a few times before jumping down and going to the door.

The vet asks the bloke to excuse him and returns a few minutes later with a bill for £80.

The vet tells him he can't help and hands him the bill.

Bloke gets very upset and asks what on earth the bill is for.

The vet replied:

'Look, I did what you asked. You've had a lab report AND a CAT scan, but the parrot is still dead!'


(Sorry :blush:)

Thanks for that, ROB. It made me laugh out loud. :laugh: :joker: :laugh:

NOBODY

bothered to finish my joke :bawling:

like yours though ROB.[very medical !]

:joker: :joker: :joker: :joker:

Sorry Boris!!

Why DID the chicken cross the road?? :conf: